Cloned Lessons
by Jarris Shepard
Summary: Q tries to force the command team together. Rating mostly K until much later.


149

TITLE: Cloned Lessons

TIME: Takes place in the fourth season, apparently. After The Killing Game II through to whenever it decides to stop.

RATING: PG

NOTES: Spoilers for Killing Game through to most likely Endgame. Please take into account that I have yet to see much of the Seventh and final season of Voyager, The channel that carried it in my area moved it to a different channel that for some reason I could not receive. I finally got the channel in time to see the last four episodes of Season seven, and I have seen only up to Spirit Folk of the Sixth. Any thing after Spirit folk is based on my reading the episode guide at the StarTrek Continuum website. So any deviation from cannon, please forgive.

^^ indicates the being actually speaking to someone when he's non-visible.

** indicates the comments, thoughts and observations of the being in his void.

Chapter 1

The week after the caretaker's array was destroyed.

The day had started like any other day of the last week since the Caretaker's array had been destroyed stranding Voyager and her crew in the Delta Quadrant. Kathryn Janeway, Captain, got herself out of bed, showered and into her uniform complete with command pips and communicator and obtained herself some breakfast compliments of Neelix, still a rather strange addition to her crew, but no stranger than Chakotay and his Maquis crew members. She'd made her appearance on the bridge, stayed long enough to make sure everything was as status quo as it could be, and then retired to her ready room to poor over the endless reports that were coming in, the complaints that the Starfleet crew had sent her regarding the Maquis crew, and the louder cries of all crew to ban Leola Root from the ship. She'd

read the Leola complaints later, she could use a good laugh and the complaints usually ran from serious to down right hilarious.

The captain had been in her ready room for two hours before someone tried to contact her. That someone was her new First Officer, Chakotay. Janeway had already admitted to herself that he was very handsome, and his tribal tattoo was interesting to say the least.

He used the door signal and awaited her command to enter. When it didn't come he signaled again, and waited a few moments. He got worried when again she didn't answer, and he opened the door hoping she'd fallen asleep at her desk reading reports, but knowing, even so early in their journey, she'd never do that. He was slightly surprised to find her ready room completely empty. She usually swept through the bridge, if she decided to visit another part of the ship, to double check that things were running smoothly and let him know where she was going. "Computer locate Captain Janeway."

The emotionless voice was infuriating as it answered, "Captain Janeway is not aboard Voyager."

"How long since the captain has been aboard Voyager?"

"Seven standard minutes."

Chakotay immediately went back to the bridge to speak with Tuvok and have Harry Kim run a scan of the area to see if she'd been beamed to another ship. The scan revealed nothing, and the bridge crew looked apprehensive. Chakotay told them to keep things quiet until they knew for sure that she was gone. He tried again to locate Janeway via the computer. This time the matronly monotone stated that, "Captain Janeway is in Sickbay."

Chakotay handed the bridge to Tuvok's capable leadership and headed to Voyager's medical bay. He found the holodoc fretting over an unconscious Janeway. "Doctor, what happened to the captain?"

"That's what I'm trying to ascertain, Commander. From the scans I've run there is nothing fatally wrong with her, nor has she been obviously injured in any way that I can tell. As far as I can tell she's under some kind of anesthetic influence as though someone knocked her out to perform surgery. Not to worry, my scans reveal that nothing of the sort was done. She does have a small scrape on her hand, but that is hardly life-threatening. I'll let you know more the minute I find it, or if she comes around."

As though she'd heard them Janeway stirred on the bed. She opened her eyes with a groan. "Ugh, what happened?"

"Take it easy Captain, you've been missing for half an hour. We'll explain later, but I need to run a few tests on you first."

"Okay Doctor, proceed." Janeway settled herself back against the bedding. "My head feels like it's about to split in half."

"That'll be the anesthesia wearing off. Other than that you're in perfect health."

"So is she cleared to return to duty or at least a debriefing?"

"A calm debriefing. Then she is to rest-"

"Ahem, I am still cognizant and in the room." Her annoyance was tangible.

"Of course, you are to rest and relax for a period of twenty-four hours. Return here before going back on duty." The EMH stated in his most serious voice.

"All right Doctor, I'll take it easy, I certainly don't want to be shut-up in here for that long." She eased herself to a sitting position and let her feet hang to the side of the bed. Uncharacteristically, Janeway accepted Chakotay's steadying shoulder when she stood herself up and wavered on her feet.

By the time they reached the lift she was steady and determined that she was fine. They settled in her ready room and Chakotay began the debriefing. "Can you tell me where you went when you were found to be missing?"

"Not really, Commander, I - everything is vague and blurry. I remember a sort of face. It was long with a softly pointed chin, a midsize nose and dark hair atop it. The room. It had to be a room, it was dark all I could see was the area immediately around me. Like I was in a spotlight on a darkened stage. It fades further the harder I try to focus on it. I'm sorry Commander."

"Don't try to force anything, Captain. It'll come back in time."

"I hope so. Am I dismissed, I'm suddenly very tired." She sounded almost like an ensign, but smiled to ease any worry.

Chakotay chortled at her joke and answered. "Yes, ma'am. Take it easy, Captain. Voyager is in good hands." He watched her exit the room and went back to the bridge. He decided to stop by after his shift and see how she was feeling.

_*_In a void somewhere in the universe a man sat watching this scene as though it were a movie. He even had a bowl of popcorn to munch as he watched them._*_

_** Well, well, well. Events are set in motion. I just hope these ungrateful mortals appreciate what I'm doing for them.**_

Chapter 2

Somewhere in the dark void in a place outside our universe.

_A bright light filters across a portion of the darkness and within the light appears a moving picture. Like a video, The picture was fuzzy through the growth solutions though. He'd learned that these people and places were very real. He liked to watch them. The being kept saying that he'd be going to them soon. He was here now, the being, watching with him again._

_** See them down there, little human, there's our favorite. She's supposed to be relaxing. Ah, well, she never does know when to take a break. You'll teach her though, won't you? Of course you will."_

_"I still like her the best sir." Came the thoughts from the growth chamber. "She_

_seems the most interesting and fun of all the others on this place called Voyager."_

_"Oh she is the most interesting, and she's learning how to have fun. Its almost time for you to go to her now."**_

Almost four years had passed since the mysterious disappearance of the captain, and they'd all but forgotten the incident. Voyager had seen some tough times in the last four years, but they'd seen some good times too. The crew could now work together as a team with no difficulties. They no longer classified themselves as `Fleet or Maquis, they were Voyager's crew.

Currently the crew was enjoying the end of a week of shoreleave on a small colony populated by a furry species that measured about 1.3 meters in height. They called themselves the Ortelians. Their faces looked like that of a reptile, large round eyes on a long, pointed face, no ears to speak of, like a lizard race, but in the place of scales they had a fine, smooth fur, that varied in color from one to another of the people, covering every visible part of their bodies. The ambassador they were liaisoned with was called Ri'stal. She was coordinating their shoreleave and would be overseeing the transfers of goods to and from Voyager. Captain Janeway had

assigned Tom Paris and Harry Kim to work with her after their leave ended. The week was a welcome break and an ease to tension that had risen from the recent first contact with the Hirogen, and then the rescue of a member of species 8472 and his return to fluidic space and the subsequent take over of the ship by the Hirogen to prolong the "hunt" of the crew. Janeway had already had her shoreleave and was back aboard her ship prepping it for its journey away from this peace to continue home.

_** We'll leave you down here. Don't forget you need to hide in the boxes to get on Voyager. I'll see you at the end of the expirament.**_

Tom Paris and Harry Kim were on the planet's surface, in the pleasantly warm sun and the even more pleasantly cool breezes, sorting goods and supplies for transport to Voyager. "Harry, I'm not saying that, I just don't have the interest in the Delanny sisters that I once did, and at the moment I'm more than happy with that." Tom said as he set a tube of buttery looking goo with the food items going to Neelix's mess hall.

"But it would be fun to double date again, Tom. You, me and the sisters, think about the possibilities." The slight blush gave him away as he rolled his eyes to the softly toned lavender heavens.

Tom dropped what he was doing for the moment to watch his friend. "That doesn't sound like the Harry Kim I met on D.S. 9. Besides you're blushing, Harry. What's the real problem here?"

"Ever since you and B'elanna started spending more time together, I don't really have anyone fun to hang out with. Tuvok isn't exactly the most animated of people to play games with especially Kal'toh. In his words `it is a game of logic for those of serious mindset'." He did his best Tuvok imitation as he quoted the Vulcan tactical officer. "I'm dying to get a game of Velocity going or play another of your Captain Proton adventures."

"I've been missing the heroics of Captain Proton myself. I'll talk to B'elanna and see what I can come up with in the way of free time to meet you on the holodeck. Maybe I can even talk her into playing Constance Goodheart." Harry gave a look that told Tom to keep dreaming. "But in the meantime let's get everything loaded on Voyager."

"Sure thing." Harry turned back to his task.

Paris tapped his comm badge, "Paris to Voyager, I have medical and food supplies to beam up to their respective locations."

During their conversation and the noise of moving heavy boxes of food and equipment neither man heard nor saw the small child crawl into an open space between two boxes. Paris stood beside the pile of medical supplies and awaited the transporter lock and the sensation of being transported. He reappeared in Sickbay to deliver the Doctor's highly anticipated supplies. "Here ya go, Doc. An upgrade for the neural scanners and plenty of replacement supplies to make up for what was used when the Hirogen were on board."

"Thank you, Lieutenant. I -" He was cut off by a shrill cry from the vicinity of the boxes. The cry became a full blown conniption that only a very small child is capable of throwing. Both the EMH and Paris began searching for the origin of the cries. Unsurprisingly, it didn't take long to find the squirming child from which the shrieks were emanating. Tom tried to lift the little one from his hiding place but was rewarded with a viscous four-toothed bite-mark to the back of his hand. "Ah! damn that hurts. He got me with every tooth he has up front." He was shouting

over the cacophony.

"Allow me, Lieutenant. I can't feel the effects of small teeth. I suggest you contact Captain Janeway and inform her of the situation. I am going to take a look at our small stowaway, and make sure he was not harmed by the unexpected transport."

"Right." Tom let himself out into the corridor so he could hear what the captain said in reply to his report.

Chapter 3

In the void.

_** It's been rather dull. I can't wait until the discovery is made. Poor little guy, he was scared nearly to death by that transport.**_

Kathryn Janeway had been settled behind her desk for no less than two hours and four cups of coffee going over reports and the spatial grid that they were about to traverse, when her comm badge chirped for attention startling her so that she spilled the coffee. Apparently she was still on edge even after the shoreleave. "Janeway here," she answered dabbing at the spill.

"Captain," Tom's voice came over the badge, "I've got a small problem, it appears that I've brought aboard a stowaway." The door to Sickbay opened as one of the Doctor's newest trainees answered his summons and the noise level of the corridor went up about ten decibels. "A very loud stowaway. He was beamed aboard with the Doctor's supplies."

"On my way Lieutenant. Janeway out." She dropped the report she was reading and left the rest of her coffee, still steaming, sitting on her desk.

"Yes, Ma'am." He turned and reentered Sickbay. His ears protested immediately. He groaned but continued on to where the doctor was using the tricorder to get some readings while the crewman restrained the wriggling, wailing tot. When Tom entered the room the EMH dismissed the crewman and Tom took over his job. Before too long the Captain joined them. Her hands immediately went to her ears. She took a moment to get used to the piercing roar coming from the bio-bed.

"What is all the fuss about?" She said looking down at the little one crying the injustice of his predicament.

"The sensation of being transported has frightened him, I believe." The Doctor answered. "He doesn't appear to have suffered any injuries or ill effects from the transporter beam. I have also surmised that he is a healthy two year old human male. With a surprisingly strong set of lungs."

"Indeed." Janeway nudged the EMH out of the way and motioned to Tom who allowed the boy up. He sat up quickly still squealing at a very high pitch. She leaned down to the level of the tear streaked face, and as he stopped screeching to take a breath she spoke softly to him. "Hello there, little face, what is wrong, hmm?" Tom and the Doctor exchanged surprised looks as the wailing calmed to a distressed hum and healthy hyperventilation. A set of red-rimmed, brilliant blue eyes looked up at her with tears pooled in them and threatening to spill. The tiny patient reached up with his little arms and Janeway plucked him off the medical bed. "There now, is that any better little fella?" The little tike smiled at her and his crying ended with the thumb he stuck in his mouth. "See that was all it took, he just needed a little comfort. I guess I'd better contact the Ortelians. Ambassador Ristal can probably help us find his family."

"Captain, I didn't know there were any humans on the planet." Paris watched the Captain bounce the child gently. The little boy continued to suck his thumb and rested his head contentedly on the captain's shoulder looking drowsy.

"Neither did I Tom, I plan on asking about this." She turned back to the doctor. "Is there any reason to keep him here in Sickbay?" She indicated her passenger. "No, Captain, I don't think so. He appears happy and healthy, now. I'm sure it will help Ri'stal to have a face to help find the parents."

"That's what I'm counting on. See you later." The captain exited Sickbay with the two year old on her hip. The little one lifted his head to look around curiously at the crew and the monitors that they passed. Tom turned to the Doc.

"Did you know that she was so handy with kids?"

The hologram shook his head, "I had no idea."

By the time she got back to her ready room her small friend was again drowsy and had added cranky just for good measure. She settled him on her lap in her office and contacted Ri'stal. While she waited for the ambassador to answer the call she watched her companion drift off to sleep.

"Hello, this is Ri'stal." Her accent was gently British with an odd but pleasant mix of Italian to it as well.

"Ahh, Ristal." Her pronunciation of the name was slightly different than the ambassador's due to the differences in the accent that came of not knowing the Ortelian language. "There's been a slight problem here. It seems a child from the surface wandered into a transporter beam with our supplies and has been beamed aboard the ship. I am in need of your help to find his parents."

"I will do all that I can ma'am." Came the soft reply.

"I hope it won't be too hard. It shouldn't, other than my crew, I didn't see any humans on your world."

The ambassador looked confused the blue fur tufts, in contrast to the soft red of the rest of her fur, that were the equivalent of human eyebrows scrunched together in quandary. "There are none. You and your crew are the first humans we have encountered."

"But this child we found, he is human, and currently on Voyager we have only one child. A girl, Naomi. I believe you met her briefly on your tour of my ship."

"Yes, I remember her, but I promise you that the child did not come from this world. We have many travelers here, but none that are human besides you. Still you will require proof." She left the field of view for a moment. "I'm sending the hospital records from my world to you. Also the spaceport records containing passenger manifests and the photos of all crew and passengers from ships. I suggest you study them and see for yourself. When you are convinced you are cleared to depart."

"So, bluntly, you don't care about a child that has been separated from his family. What are we to do with him assuming we don't find his family?" Janeway was completely baffled by the turn in events.

"I suggest taking him with you and finding him a family where there are more of his kind, it would be in the best interest of the child. Leaving him here would serve no purpose. In fact it would be to doom him to a life of servitude." The view screen went blank at that suggestion. The brusque manner was typical of the Ortelians.

Janeway looked dubiously down at the soundly sleeping baby and smoothed a locke of hair that had fallen across his forehead. `Well,' she thought, "I guess you're staying with us for a while, little fella." She finished aloud and rose to settle him on the couch. She returned to her desk to begin going over the data that Ri'stal had sent.

Her door signaled for attention after a few minutes. The sharp noise startled her companion awake. He began his high pitched wail again. "Come in, already." She called as she hurried to quiet the child again.

"Spirits, I didn't believe Tom, but it appears that the kid does have a large capacity for air. I could hear him through the bulkhead." Her first officer stood just inside the door with a PADD in his hands watching her bounce the boy on her knees while the curious little bundle twisted and tried to grasp the rank pips on her neck.

"Yes, he does, and it appears that the Ortelians have no idea where he came from. I have information that may help us find his family, but Ristal seemed fairly certain. Leading to the predicament we have now, we'll be holding orbit until the records are studied and I'm convinced that there is no one missing him. If that turns out to be the case, this little fellow," she paused to look down at the child, "is going to be joining us on our journey home." She answered as she craned her neck away out of his reach.

"He is?" Chakotay came further into the room.

"Ambassador Ristal has informed me that the Ortelians have no official position on what becomes of him, and she suggested that it is in his best interests to take him with us."

"Ahh, good old governmental concern for the little people. Literally in this case. So what are we going to do with him?" He reached out to chuck the boy under the chin. He was rewarded with a slap at his hand and a giggle then the little one went back to his attempt to obtain the captain's pips.

"Well, take him with us. I surely won't leave him here with out human parents. That isn't proper decorum, but the Ortelian culture still allows for a type of slavery. The lower class citizens work for the upper class to earn food, but they don't have a chance for any advances in that type of work. They'll do it for the rest of their lives. I'm not leaving a human child behind thereby dooming him to that kind of life." She stopped bouncing her legs as the little one started to squirm. She let him down gently and steadied him as he wobbled on his feet. He took a few unstable steps tentatively, eventually giving up and crawling over to the desk and climbing onto a nearby chair. The first thing he went for was the nearest PADD, and straight into his mouth it went. Neither officer noticed as they continued their discussion and began to peruse the data together.

Janeway sent some of the information to Seven of Nine in astrometrics. Seven was the only one that might be able to speed the process and still be efficient. By the time Janeway did notice the boy a few minutes later, the PADD was completely sodden. Chakotay laughed heartily as the little boy smiled up at his captain while she cleaned the baby goo from her work area. "I think, I'll just take him back to the doctor until I figure out what to do with him. Besides we should be just about done with loading and he needs to be checked out more thoroughly before we head out. We are almost ready aren't we?"

"Yes, Captain. Six more loads and we'll be ready to go. All we have to wait on now is Seven's report and your own conclusions."

"All right, keep me informed if I'm not on the bridge by the time they finish." The two command officers went separate ways out of her office. The captain was soon back into the room to collect her tiny stow-away. "Sorry about that, fella, this has turned out to be one heck of a day." He smiled up at her innocently, as though nothing was amiss. She thought for a moment that the smile looked familiar, but had more important things on her mind. The two of them entered Sickbay and she informed the doctor that he had a new patient to look over for the time being.

"Make sure that he isn't carrying any dormant illnesses, and find out what he is and is not allergic to. I don't want to chance it that he might have an allergy to the foods we serve here in case he does join us on our way. I need to get back to the bridge. He's in your care Doctor, for a while at least. I'll be back once we've found something."

"Of course, Captain." The doc looked dubiously at the little fellow gracing his bio-bed. "Well, my little friend, shall we get started." He pulled his medical Tricorder out to begin his scans. At the first noise from his equipment the chubby face screwed up and the wailing began in full force. Janeway heard the wailing and paused with the most peculiar urge to return to him, she dismissed it as Chakotay called her back to the bridge.

Chapter 4

In the void again.

_** Well it was good for a while, but this is getting boring. All work and no play. Oh well, They're almost finished then we can really begin.**_

"Captain, we're ready to head out." Harry Kim's voice projected across the bridge. It had taken Seven four hours to peruse the data and come to the same conclusion that Janeway ultimately did herself two hours after Seven delivered the report. There was no one on the planet nor had there been ever, that the little one could belong to.

"Take us away, Mr. Paris, set course for the Alpha Quadrant, warp six."

"Yes Ma'am." Tom's hands moved over his station gracefully and the Starship Voyager left orbit of the Ortelian planet. "Permission to inquire, Captain?" He asked once they were on their way.

"Of course, Tom." She knew what it would be about. She hadn't informed anyone other than Chakotay, the Doctor and Seven of the fate of the child.

"What happened to the boy? Did you find his parents?" His chair swiveled so that he was facing her.

"No, as a matter of fact, he is currently in Sickbay under the Doctor's care. I'll be announcing his incorporation into Voyager's family and crew as soon as I figure out what to do with him. I've got the Doctor running some tests to see if we can figure out, through the medical database, who, if anyone, the little fella belongs to. Until I know more his existence remains on the bridge. Understood?"

There was a chorus of `yes captain' from every station. With that Janeway turned the bridge over to Chakotay and headed for Sickbay.

_**Oh goodie, it starts. I hope.**_

The doctor had informed her of the child's complete health well before their departure time. He had no dormant illnesses and he didn't appear to have been sick for quite some time.

The doors slid aside and she walked into the medical bay. Her EMH was hovering over a screen near the bio-bed where their small crew member sat playing with some toddler friendly building blocks, seemingly content to listen to the hologram, who was reading the test results aloud to him. "Doctor, report." The little one on the bed looked up at her voice and sent her a four-toothed smile, as she made her way around equipment to the doctor's side.

"So far, Captain, I don't have anything to report about his genetics. It will be at least four more hours before the computer is finished running it's scan. Until then, all I can say is that he's a very healthy and happy little boy. There is one thing to report that is rather disturbing. He doesn't speak. He uses grunts and gestures to make himself understood. At two years of age he should be able to make simple two or three word sentences."

"Is he deaf? Is that why he can't speak?" She reached out a finger to caress the smooth cheek of the boy, gurgling happily on the bed. She was rewarded with a smile and a giggle, and little fingers that tried to latch onto hers, they succeeded and held on tightly.

"No oddly enough, he hears very well, and there is nothing wrong, that I can find, with his larynx. He just doesn't know how, as though he's never heard a spoken word. I suggest we start working right away to teach him to speak. I know of several programs that can help him. If we can at least bring him up to the level he should be on he will, hopefully, learn the rest naturally."

"Okay, how do we do that." She was now watching the child getting to his feet, even more unstable than he had been in her ready room, on the soft surface of the bed.

"I further suggest that he be left in my care while whoever is going to take over caring for him is on duty." The Holodoc reached out to steady the determined boy who was tying to walk toward the captain.

"I haven't announced he's even aboard let alone decided who'll care for him. I suppose that until we know more about him I'll keep him in my quarters and leave him here while on duty, which I am now." She reached out with her other hand, the one that the child didn't have a hold on, and took over for the Doctor in keeping the little one from falling as he got closer. He walked straight to her and then sat himself down leaning into her hip, where she slouched against the bed, clapping chubby hands and then chewing his pointing finger vigorously.

"It appears he's fond of you, captain."

"So it would seem." She looked thoughtful for a while absently stroking the auburn down on his little head, then took a deep breath to rouse herself from thought. "I get off duty in about two hours. Why don't you start that speech program and I'll be back for him when my shift ends."

_**Oh, geez back to the dull stuff. Oh well, the foundation has begun to establish I can wait for a few more hours. Really, what are hours when I've got eternity.**_

"I can do that captain. See you in two hours." The doctor began dictating to the computer to call up the program he'd spoken of. The captain gently scooted the boy to the center of the bed and bid him farewell. She didn't notice the look of consternation as he watched her leave, change to sorrow when the door closed behind her. Fortunately, the Doctor turned back in time to catch the toddler before he climbed over the edge of the bio-bed.

"Oh no, young man, you are going to stay here and learn to talk." The little boy blew a raspberry in reply. "My boy when we are through you'll still be quite capable of that, but will have a much more efficient way to make yourself understood. Shall we then?" The doc carried his patient over to a chair and sat with him to watch the screen of the computer, and listen to the lessons.

The bridge was in full duty mode when she returned. "Welcome back, Captain. I trust everything is calm in Sickbay."

"Yes, Commander Tuvok, calm as can be." She walked around the railing to gain access to her seat. "Is everything status quo here Commander Chakotay?"

"Yes, Captain. It's quiet at the moment." He was standing at easy attention as he always did.

"Good, you have the bridge. I have quite a bit of work to do, I'll be in my ready room." With those orders she left the bridge and settled in her office with a cup of coffee. Janeway dove into the reports on her desk and had them finished with thirty minutes to spare for her thoughts about the newest member of Voyager's family.

Chapter 5

In a void somewhere outside the universe.

_**La, la la, I'm so board. How can I record data from this experiment when the subjects aren't doing anything.** _

She thought of giving him a name now and saving some trouble, but she didn't want to take that right away from someone else if another member of the crew took the boy in. She was tempted to set the child in Tom Paris's lap. He was the one that brought him aboard, and the responsibility of a dependent may help the young man to grow up some. Yet, that didn't seem right, to unload the boy on Tom for a superficial reason, even if he did show concern for the kid. Possibly Samantha Wildman, she had a child and the two would benefit from each other's company. If she was going to go on a feeling, though, she'd have to say that it would be easiest on everyone to take him in herself, she did like the little guy. She hoped that the Doctor's scans would shed a little light on this problem and help her make this decision. She was just too involved to make her own unaided decision at this moment.

_**Oh look, movement, goodie.**_

She looked at the time and decided that getting off a little early for once wouldn't hurt anything. After setting all her equipment on standby she walked out through the bridge.

"Commander Chakotay."

"Yes, Captain?" Chakotay looked up from the console between their chairs.

"It's a bit early but I'm done, and the rest of the shift is yours. I'll have my communicator, of course, but I'm officially off duty for the evening."

"Aye, Captain. Good luck." He offered, knowing where she was headed, flashing the dimples that could be classified as a dangerous weapon. They had the power to weaken the knees of any female member of the crew. Janeway fought her own weakening knees and nodded as she left the bridge behind. As she entered Sickbay she noted the silence was only disturbed by the usual bleeps from the computer.

"Doctor?" She inquired softly. "Hello?"

"Ah, Captain, here we are." He stated from behind the desk in his office. "You'll be pleased to know that our young friend is already, Umm, potty trained, I suppose is the most polite term. Very well, I might add."

"How is that possible, he can barely walk?"

"He needs help, of course, but he'll let you know when he needs to go. You'll have to hold him on the toilet but the rest he takes care of himself."

"That's a relief. No diapers to change tonight, huh pal?" Kathryn asked as she stooped to the child's level. "What have we been up to in here?"

"Lessons, of course, he's very fond of the Flotter stories, but takes to any story told to him."

"Is that all his lessons are? Reading stories to him? I can do that, I'd enjoy it." She gathered the child closer and lifted him off the deck. "Hello there." The same almost familiar crooked smile with four tiny teeth flashed at her. His little hands finally grasped the pips that he'd been trying for earlier and he tried to put one in his mouth. Janeway re-appropriated it and put it back into it's place. "Those aren't toys little fella. They aren't food either."

"That's not precisely all, but it helps. There is a separate part of the therapy that I conduct here. Let him listen to stories while he sleeps too, he'll hear and learn from them even though he's asleep. At least, he should, I admit that there are some cases it didn't work, but he's shown improvement already, that's a good indication that it will work."

"Oh really, already?" Slight surprise and admiration on her face belied her interest.

"I'll show you. Set him on his feet." She complied, the little one immediately started to hold up his hands to her, with whines and grunts composed of an ugh sound.

"Now, ask him what he wants." The doctor instructed.

"What is it, little fella? What do you want?" She watched him concentrate on her words and then consider for a moment what to do about it.

"Up," was the succinct statement. The word was clear, though, the child's voice was tentative.

_** Very impressive.**_

"Up." This time the statement was more insistent and the voice more bold and with a hint of distress. She raised an eyebrow, with a little more time his statement would turn into a demand.

"You want up?" She asked. The tiny head nodded.

"Wah up." Again the arms held high and the hands open. Janeway lifted him off the deck once more.

"Very good, you see, he's taking the initiative already. Still needs some work, but he's getting the idea. Just remember, Captain, when he starts to grunt and point ask him what he wants until he at least attempts to tell you with words. Also remind him to use his words, when he gets frustrated he may revert to non-verbal communications.

"Right, I have been around children before doctor. What about food? Should I replicate something special for him, like a bottle, or will our mess hall suffice?"

"Nothing special really, just make sure you cut the pieces very small so he can chew them. I would suggest you keep him away from the Leola root dishes. It tends to be hard for small children to digest. I've had Naomi Wildman in here more than once because the Leola root had upset her little tummy. He's rather a little old to be sucking a bottle, but a toddler's cup such as this one," he held up a small cup with a bespouted lid secured to the top, "should suffice. He can drink it while falling asleep if need be. This will prevent any spills."

"Okay, doctor. As soon as that analysis is finished you'll be sure to contact me with the information."

"Of course, Captain. It shouldn't be too much longer."

_**Ahh, time for her to start her lessons.**_

"We'll be in my cabin then. I do believe that someone here needs some dinner." She looked intently at the child in her arms as she brought her face closer to his until their foreheads came into contact.

"Go," came the softly excited reply.

"Yes, go. Go home."

"Hum," was the attempt.

"Close enough, for now." She answered indicating his attempt and the fact that her quarters were a temporary arrangement.

"Dink." His little hand reached for the cup the doctor still held.

"Here you go." He handed the drink over and the boy tilted his head back to drink from the spout. After gathering the blocks into a bag provided by the doctor Kathryn Janeway carried both the bag and the boy out of Sickbay and straight to her quarters. She felt the strangest inclination to stop by the mess and grab something to eat, and show her companion around, but she refrained and took him to her cabin to get him a bath and a meal.

_**Darn it, I guess that step will come later. I admit it would have upset my predictions had she gone in there and shown the child off. The inclination does exhibit a motherly impulse to flaunt her offspring. Interesting.**_

The Doctor found the captain and her guest reading a story after the computer finished it's analysis and returned the results to him. He studied them further when the puzzling results arrived. He ran his own tests, between administering a hypospray to cure a headache and treating the minor burns an engineer had sustained when he'd not listened to careful instructions that the Leola Root tea was very hot. He finally decided that it was best to have Janeway there in person to run a counter analysis by.

Chapter 6

The call was later than she'd expected, but still not so very late. The little one was sitting in her lap just barely starting to nod off as Janeway read to him allowing him to gum her index finger into wrinkles. He'd been overly cranky with a mild fever since his meal and bath, and she'd remembered a friend's baby acting much the same while teething. She'd bravely stuck a finger in to feel his gums after contacting the doctor and she'd discovered a small bump where he was getting a new incisor to go with the rest of his upper teeth. The doctor had suggested allowing him to chew something soft and rubbery like his blocks or some crushed ice in a cloth. She'd tried but the boy rejected both, and reverted to chewing his fingers grumpily, whining every now and then to voice his frustration. He wasn't getting the right contact with his fingers and the sensitive gum where the new tooth was slicing through painfully and had whimpered miserably. Janeway looked in the database to see what methods she might try to help ease his pain. There were many and some he'd taken to, but they hadn't worked. Unable to stand by and watch his discomfort, she'd come to the last resort and stuck her finger back in his mouth and gently massaged his gum over the tooth, and he'd calmed almost immediately snuggling closer. So she was still sitting with him in her lap, one finger in his mouth keeping a soothing pressure on his gum and reading to him hoping he'd be able to fall asleep peacefully with the pain in his mouth when her com beeped.

_**The discovery is revealed, let's see how you like it.**_

Kathryn set the book aside to answer her comm badge. "Yes?"

"Book," the fatigued, insistent whine almost drowned out the Doctor's voice even when it was muffled around her finger.

"In a moment, little friend." She turned back to her badge. "Have the results finally come in?"

"Yes and no, Captain. I'd like for both you and our friend to come back here. I want to run a DNA reference scan between the two of you."

"Why? Did something abnormal come back to you?" She looked down at the child in her arms.

"Actually, yes. With what I have here it appears that the child is either your son, or the son of an immediate family member."

"But Doctor it's impossible he can't be my son. I haven't given birth, and if he's a nephew or a cousin how did he get to the Delta Quadrant?"

"No that's true, you haven't and I don't know how he could have appeared here, but the genetic analysis can't be wrong." She could just see the holographic shoulders shrug in bewilderment.

"We'll be right there."

_**Here we go, oh boy, oh boy. This is so much fun. I love my job.**_

"Okay, Doctor, what is going on?" Captain Janeway entered with a flourish and a small human shaped tape recorder.

"Go on?"

The EMH was taken aback for a moment. "Has he been like this all evening?"

"Yes, besides finding archaic ways to deal with a teething toddler, we've been practicing. Now, what is going on?"

"Oh, right. I need you both to sit,"

"Sit." The little one liked small words and repeated them when he recognized one.

The doctor continued uninterrupted by the repetition, "up on the bio-bed and I'll take a small, fresh sample of your DNA to run against his.

We're looking for matches in the strand. Matches mean that I didn't make a mistake as I think I did, but they also mean that he is your flesh and blood."

"I'll say again that's impossible."

"Iposle." The large words were harder and didn't come out right.

_**Just accept it, woman. How stubborn you can be.**_

"I agree with you, Captain, but as I said earlier, genetics don't lie."

"Of course, you're right, Doctor. How long will this take?"

"Not long. I've got both sides to work with now. Earlier I had only one piece of the puzzle."

"How could this have happened, and when, with all that we've been through? When could someone have gotten access to my DNA sequence?"

The doctor had nothing to say to her, at the moment, to offer a solution so he said nothing and watched the analysis closely on the screen. The sequencing started to show the matches in the two strands of DNA. He knew that for her to be the child's mother the matches would have to be at least half of the genes, but when the match percentage hit one-hundred and didn't move, and the computer declared the DNA to be an identical strand, he stared in shock at the boy sitting calmly in the captain's lap. This was next to impossible.

_** Never tell me it's impossible to do something. I'll prove ya wrong.**_

"Captain, the analysis is complete. It confirms that he is of your bloodline but you are not his mother. I've rechecked this twice now, and there is no mistake. Slight differences in his chromosomes, but no mistake. Captain, that child in your lap is a clone."

"A clone of who, exactly?" She asked though she had a sneaky suspicion that she already knew.

"You, Captain."

"That can't be. Look at him; he's a, and I'm a..." She almost dropped the little boy before the Doctor made it to her side and lifted him to the bed to sit beside her. It was starting to make sense. The smile that seemed so familiar, the big blue eyes that even now watched her every move.

"It's true, Captain. I don't know how or why, but if your mother had given birth to a son when you were born," the doc pointed to the boy beside her, "he would be you."

"How? No, when? How fast can you grow a clone and it be functional still?" She was running through a mental list of the enemies that they'd made in the Delta Quadrant so far. Seska, she certainly seemed the type to do something like this, but she was dead and they were far from the Kazon-Nistrom holdings.

"Theoretically, no less than the normal growth rate of the species being cloned, Captain. As you know, cloning a being is illegal in Federation space, and is not a fully developed practice."

"But then how is this possible?"

The Doctor was quietly pensive for a moment. "Captain, I've been pondering that question myself, and although the aging is a bit off, I wonder if it-" He trailed off momentarily and started over. "Do you remember the week after Voyager destroyed the Caretaker's array?" She nodded thinking back and then grasped what he was saying.

"My disappearance, but that's been three years at least. He's only two." She thought for a moment. "I suppose that a clone could be grown slower than the normal growth rate, or the creator didn't begin right away."

"Yes, it's been proven that a clone grown slower is actually the more successful clone."

"But why would someone clone me, and for that matter to what end have they deposited him on Voyager?" She watched the boy beside her on the bed, knowing what measures the federation stated should be taken, and knowing that after spending the afternoon and evening with him it was already out of the question.

"As I said, I don't know. What should I do with him Captain?" The Doc asked in anticipation of her rejection of the child, due to stated protocol within Starfleet.

"He'll definitely stay with me, Doctor. A clone is a genetic replica, but he's not me. I've never agreed with the decree that all clones should be destroyed for the greater good nor the theory that they are less than a human being. Our life experiences are what make us who we truly are inside. Those can never be duplicated. What this makes him is more like a twin. Same face and genes, but a completely different person." Her chin was set with determination. "He's my genetic duplicate so he's, my son, sort of. At least in the sense that he was made from my genetics. He's my responsibility, at the very least. Who knows, motherhood might be good for me." She said the last with a lopsided grin, secretly ecstatic and terrified at the prospect.

_** That's the spirit. This is almost too easy. Wait, I forget, she still has to adjust to the responsibility of having a child.**_

"I'll see you in the morning, Doctor, when I drop him off for his lessons." She gathered the sleepy child back into her arms. "Oh, before we go, is there anything you can do about this teething problem, I can't very well sleep with a finger in his mouth."

"You stuck your finger in his mouth, Captain?"

"Rubbing his gums was the only thing that worked, I went through the database for anything that might help without having to come here and disturb your work. He'd tried chewing his own fingers but it didn't work, and I couldn't stand to watch him suffer."

"Mr. Paris would think you recklessly brave. He's got a nice bruise from our small crewman's bite earlier. I offered to treat it, but he said that it wasn't necessary. He needed the reminder that it wasn't smart to stick his hands out to strange children. His humor wasn't all that successful."

"I'm sure." Janeway was mildly amused.

"I can replicate an analgesic cream that is safe to put in his mouth. It numbs the gum so I'd use something other than a finger to apply it. It'll leave the finger numb as well." He came back from the replicator with the tube of salve.

"Thank you, Doctor. See you in the morning. Come on, little one, time to go."

"Go, hum?" Came the sleepy inquiry from the region of her shoulder.

"Yes, we're going home. Our home." She kissed the tiny forehead and off they went, home to her, their, quarters, leaving behind a thoroughly bewildered, yet strangely satisfied Doctor.

Late that night she met her first challenge of parenthood when the little one woke and started his unique squall. At first she couldn't figure out what the problem was. She'd applied the cream to his gum before turning in and her finger was still numb from it, so his mouth should be too. She'd decided to heed the doctor's advice next time.

After a few moments she realized that he needed to relieve himself so she rose from the bed and helped him as the doctor had suggested. That done she cleaned both his and her own hands and carried him back to her bed, he again began to cry and she rocked him trying to calm him. When it didn't work she pondered what he might need, and remembered the doctor's words from this evening.

"What do you need, little one?"

"Cup," came the strained answer. She mentally kicked herself for not realizing that sooner as she reached behind her to the bedside table and retrieved the half-full cup.

"Here you go, sweetheart?" She handed him the cup and the little one immediately had it in his mouth sucking greedily on the milk; his whimpers muffled and finally stilled as he became content. She settled down on her side to watch him drink in the soft starlight. The little one turned onto his side, as well, facing her and scooted so that he was close enough to her that the cup brushed her ribs while he drank. His right arm came up from under him to hold the cup in place while he began to rub the bunched folds of her silken night-dress between the fingers of his left hand in the way she'd seen Naomi play with her mother's hair while she fell asleep a few weeks ago at a crew gathering. She caressed his cheek with the back of her fingers and smoothed the hair from his brow.

When she realized what he was doing she felt a here-to-fore unknown emotion rise in her and tears gathered in her eyes, and for once didn't try to define it only to feel it. She lay enjoying the first realization that she was now a mother to this precious child. As she watched him the cup began to droop closer and closer down between them and finally, when it rested fully against her, she gently lifted it and set it back on the nightstand. His little hand had stilled against her gown, while he still sucked at the ghost of the cup, and he sighed into a deeper sleep. She smiled softly and turned back to watch him until she joined him in slumber.

Chapter 7

The next morning Janeway's alarm went off twenty minutes earlier than normal. She wanted to make sure she had time to get the little one ready to go, and still be on time for her shift. She left him sleeping while she showered and dressed then replicated him a jumper and shoes. When her guest was dressed and ready she went to meet Chakotay for breakfast. Her companion was only just waking as she walked to the mess.

The doors opened and she entered there were quite a few double takes and assorted gasps, she pointedly ignored them and continued to the serving line. Neelix greeted her and inquired about the baby in her arms while she gathered their plates. "He's going to be with us on our journey Neelix, and he's my responsibility."

"I'm ecstatic Captain. Another child on Voyager will be wonderful. Let me help you with those plates."

"That's all right Neelix, I'll help the Captain." Chakotay had arrived while she and Neelix were chatting. "Good morning, Captain, how was your night."

"Fine, I didn't have any major crises. Just a minor one easily handled."

"I heard. I was reading when he started crying around midnight."

"We're getting on nicely so far." The three of them left Neelix and went to the table in the corner where she and the commander always ate. "But then it's only been an evening. The next few days will tell the tale."

"If you need anything just call. I'll be announcing his presence as soon as I get to the bridge."

"Thank you, for handling that, let them know that he'll be staying with me permanently. I've thought it over and that is the best recourse considering all facts. I suspect that it will take the crew time to adjust to him. Keep me apprised of the general feel of the crew." Chakotay seemed to take this declaration in stride, and continued unfazed.

"I suspect you won't need my help there Kathryn. They'll let you know themselves. Our crew is very bold that way. So how was your first night of parenthood?"

"Interesting, he's teething and I spent part of the night with my finger in his mouth, and the rest with it numb from the medicine that the doctor gave me to help his pain. I had a wonderful time though. It's been a long time since I played with a baby. We had fun." She had been eating her food while the little one looked groggily around them. He now made his presence known with a whine and a demand.

"Dink." Kathryn pulled his cup out of the bag she'd gotten last night and handed it over. He settled back against her while he drank the juice she'd filled it with.

"Are you hungry yet little guy? Let's give this a try." She looked over at Chakotay watching her. "You might want to be ready to duck. I don't know if he'll like this or not." She lifted a spoonful of oatmeal and offered it to the child. He lowered his cup and took the bite from the spoon as though he were starving.

"Num." He swallowed and opened his mouth for another bite, which she offered. After the third bite he grabbed for the spoon and she relinquished it. He was clumsy, but able to feed himself satisfactorily with only a moderate mess.

"At least you're getting along well." Chakotay said as he watched the little one work with the spoon. He was as surprised as the doctor and Tom had been that she was so natural with the little boy. "May I?" He asked when the baby started to squirm and fight.

"If he doesn't mind go ahead." She lifted the baby up and Chakotay accepted him. The tot looked up into the commander's face for a moment before reaching back across the table. Kathryn moved to retrieve him, but he didn't seem distressed so she waited. He re-atained the spoon and stuck it in his mouth.

"Let me help with that, kiddo, I don't want Oatmeal down my front." The captain rolled her eyes dabbing at the glop on her uniform.

"Oh well, at least it's on the black, once it dries it won't be noticeable." She watched her first officer with the toddler for a moment. He was as much of a natural with children as she was with this child. It was a moment that ended all to soon. "We need to get moving, little one."

She retrieved the child from Chakotay. "I need to get him to sickbay before I go to the bridge. See you there, Commander." She piled the tray and bowl and returned them to Neelix then departed for Sickbay.

"Good morning, Doctor, here we are." She was greeted by the EMH and passed the boy to him. "I'll be back for lunch. If I can find a few free minutes, and I'll see you both at the end of my shift." She kissed the little forehead and made her way to the bridge. Chakotay's announcement came over the system while she was on her way to the turbolift. She smiled at the passing crewman, who looked at her a little oddly.

The following day was as much of a challenge but also as much of a blessing as the previous had been. She'd had very few problems getting the little one to sleep or eat, but having to keep normal meal and sleep schedules were driving her system to the brink. Every time she came up against an obstacle and wondered how she would be able to continue the tiny replica did something to bring that undefined elation to the surface anew, and she decided that any obstacle or amount of frustration was well worth the feelings that he brought forth. She was learning to read the boy and he was learning to speak at an astounding rate, which made it easier to discern what he desired. His progress was amazing, until she remembered her mother commenting on how fast she'd learned to talk as a baby.

The few crises had been minor ones, and Janeway was looking forward to a quiet evening with, well, she really would have to get around to naming him soon, wouldn't she. In fact, on this particular evening that is exactly what she was trying to do when Chakotay showed up at her door.

"What is it Commander? We're very busy here."

"Busy. Hmm." Her little companion was busy with some newly replicated toys as his hair dried from his evening bath. How he got dirty on a starship with no dirt was beyond her.

"I just wanted to talk for a bit, about our newest crew member."

"Well, that's one of my favorite topics of late. I've been trying to get input from others for a name. I know I want to name him after my father, but that leaves me a name short."

"I don't know, Captain. I would agree that he needs a name though. We can't keep calling him little one, or boy."

"Please Chakotay, we're off duty, and in the most informal setting I could have ever imagined myself in. I've just given my child a bath and am covered in his dinner. Call me Kathryn."

"That is what I wanted to talk to you about, Kathryn. He's not your child. What happens when we find his parents?"

"We won't find them, Chakotay. I know this much."

"How do you know? Kathryn! Your judgment is clouded here, this child has a family somewhere."

"That's right, Commander, he does. The fact of the matter is, except for me, he won't be seeing them, in all likelihood, for seventy years. Give or take a few." Her tone was certain, not reproving in the least. She knew that he didn't have all the facts. The captain of Voyager turned back to watch the two-year-old child sitting in the middle of her floor playing with his toys.

"You mean you know who they are? Why didn't you tell me?"

"Yes, I've known since the day he came aboard. I didn't say anything because it's taking me a while to get used to the truth behind his origins. I've known his family for quite some time actually." She thought of the oddities of life for a moment and her lips turned up in her trademark crooked grin.

"It doesn't change the fact that he is not your son." Chakotay's voice hardened and the tone left her thinking he felt hurt that she had kept information from him.

Kathryn Janeway turned to fully face her tall first officer, a sort of passive anger written on her face. She was more than annoyed but less than enraged. "No it doesn't, but Chakotay neither does it change the fact that he is as close to being my child as he can get without my actually giving birth to him. He's my genetic replica. In the words of the Doctor, `If your mother had given birth to a son when you were born. He would be you.'

"That means he's not a just of a family relation to me. He is me, Chakotay. He's my clone. A clone that has had the chromosomes altered to change it's sex. It's amazing and frightening and wonderful and horrible all in one breath, Chakotay." She was breathless herself at the moment, and Chakotay could already see that she'd fight for this child if necessary. "At the very least it is scientifically fascinating and at the very most a miracle. At least to me. So, no, I'm not literally his mother, but I'm the closest thing he's going to get to one so long as we're all alive. I seriously doubt that my mother would rear another child at her age, even if we got back to the Alpha Quadrant tomorrow." He could see that she was waiting for him to quote regs to her and he purposefully avoided them. He didn't want her to feel she'd have to fight him on this.

"A clone." His shock was evident in his features. "Of you," and in his stilted speech. "But why make a clone of you, for that matter who cloned you and how did he get to where we found him?"

"I'm not sure, Chakotay, in fact I asked that very same question two days ago, it would appear from his age that he was created some time in the last two or three years, but he is my clone and therefore my responsibility. Look at him. Not just a casual glance Chakotay, really study his features. It's all me. Same chin, nose, mouth shape, eyes both shape and color. He's me. I've compared him to photos of myself at 3, and aside from my having had longer hair the two are absolutely identical. I'm going to have the doctor do some passive testing and see if he can find anything suspicious, but until he does find something I'll be caring for him when I'm not on duty, and most likely thinking of him when I am. He'll be in the Doctor's care when I'm on duty, at least until he learns to talk a little better. After that I suppose I'll have to hire baby-sitters like Sam Wildman does. It wouldn't be fair to Neelix to just expect him to care for both children. I'll find someone that won't mind. So, if that's all Commander, I have someone to get better aquatinted with." The comment appeared to be an aside because she had already moved to sit across from the little boy on the floor.

"I suppose that is all Captain." He turned to go, then thought of something and turned back. "Except to ask what you'll tell the crew and find out what you'll be naming him, for the official record."

"As for what to tell the crew, nothing. The doctor, you and I are the only ones that will know he is my clone unless I decide to tell Tuvok. As for a name, I'm not sure, as I said I know I want my father's name, Edward, to be a part of it, but the other I haven't figured out yet. I've been thinking of some of the great captains from Starfleet, but they don't seem to fit.

"Kirk's first name was James, that doesn't fit this child, neither does Jean Luc, Leonard for the doctor of the original Enterprise but that's a horrible name, Montgomery is no better. I thought about Jonathan, and decided against it, also Justin Edward as a tribute to the two men who died in that horrible crash, but I don't know if I can live with it.

"Scott is a possibility, but I'm not jumping into any decisions. What do you think about Scott Edward? I like it, but I like others too, William Edward is nice. Matthew I like, but then I can get creative too. Daren, Kieri, I just can't decide. Maybe I should start a pool."

"I think that whatever you choose will be fine. Edward is a good choice though. Maybe you should stick with that line of traditional names. Even look at the person the name comes from. Your father had a great impact upon your life and career, is there anyone else like that with a name that would fit to Edward?"

"Well, there's Admiral Paris, Tom's father, I served as a science officer under him for quite some time. He's the one that introduced me to Voyager while she was still docked. Owen is his first name. Owen. Owen Edward. Edward Owen. Owen Edward Janeway. I like it," her voice had taken on a softer tone that could only be described as maternal, "I like it better than anything I've come up with before now. Owen Edward it is."

"All right then, I'll fill it out and make the announcement, and I'll see you tomorrow morning." He waited for a reply, but the captain had gone back to playing with the child aquatinting him with his new name, and didn't appear to have heard him, so Chakotay grinned at the scene his captain and friend made, sitting Indian style on the floor holding a toddler and watching him try to figure out which hole the cube went into, and let himself out.

_** Don't these two ever stay angry at each other? I think it's time I livened things up on my own.**_

Chakotay bolted up out of bed reaching blindly for a phaser that wasn't there, and was half way to tapping his combadge and calling security when the shrill wails coming from the opposite side of the bulkhead registered as Owen's unique pitch of supreme discontent. He sighed and rubbed his face wearily. This was the third night in a row that Owen had awakened this way. Chakotay pitied the captain, if he was awakened by the squeals through a bulkhead then she surely was suffering being that she was in the same room with them. He again reached for his badge, but hailed the captain instead of security.

"Chakotay to Janeway." There was no response and he realized abruptly that with the cacophony she probably couldn't hear the hail. So he threw a robe over his tee-shirt and sweatpants and pulled on a pair of socks, then made his way out of his quarters and down to the captain's. He sat on the door signal until she opened it, with a howling Owen in her arms.

"I'm sorry for the disturbance Commander. I can't seem to calm him down tonight." She turned back to re-enter her quarters and let him follow her in.

"That's all right, Kathryn. I just came to see if maybe I could help a little." He watched her pace the room and bounce Owen gently patting his little bottom to try and calm him. He noticed Owen's small bespouted cup lying on it's side on the floor as though it had been dropped there. "He wasn't thirsty, I take it." Chakotay stated as he went to pick up the cup and set it on the table.

"No he wasn't. I handed it to him while he was still in bed and he tossed it across the room and out the door. I'm open to suggestions. He was a wonderful sleeper until I replicated that crib and put him in it. Now he wakes up at least twice a night, and I'm afraid my neighbors are about to mutiny. Tom has complained already; he said that Owen's screeching reminds of the raptors in one of his old movies about dinosaurs, you're here now, I'm sure that B'elanna won't be far behind."

"I'm not here to complain, I want to help if I can. He was sleeping with you in your bed wasn't he?" She nodded, Owen's earsplitting wails still piercing the serenity of the night. "It might be that he doesn't like the sides of the crib, Kathryn. I always felt like I was interred in a crib or a bed with force-fields around it. Try leaving the side down when you put him back to bed. If that works have the crib's energy reabsorbed and replicate a low sitting toddler bed. He wont feel trapped and he'll have the security of a short drop if he rolls off in the night." She seemed to ponder this while still attempting to calm Owen.

"I'll try anything to help him sleep. He's wearing me out. The doctor suggested that it might be he's started to teethe again." Chakotay chuckled softly at her statement. "What's so funny?"

"Hearing you say that, Kathryn Janeway, the captain who defeated the Kazon, Hirogen, 8472, and the Vidiians, not to mention the Borg. She gets worn thin by a toddler after three nights of insomnia." He dodged the small stuffed bunny that she hurled carelessly at him. "Anyway, let me have a go at that, you're pretty wound up. He might be having trouble calming because you are so tense." She relinquished the blanketed child to her First Officer and watched as he stood and swayed from side to side like some supple reed in the wind while soothing Owen's back with a circular rubbing motion. He shushed the child softly and held him securely, close to his heart. After a few minutes of this, Owen's wails calmed to whimpers and then fell into a sedate silence as he dozed off his little face buried against the commander's shoulder.

Janeway sighed in relief as Chakotay stopped swaying but continued to soothe the baby's back. He continued this for a few minutes more and then nodded to her room. Kathryn retrieved the small cup and led the way in and pulled down the covers of the crib she'd replicated. Chakotay placed Owen into the crib. She then deposited the cup in one corner of the crib and arranged the blanket and covers around him delicately, leaving the side down as Chakotay had suggested. He still stood beside the crib watching Owen's breathing and the tiny eyes behind his lids moving back and forth.

"Thank you, Chakotay. I'll have to get you to teach me that trick sometime." The statement and the gratitude were as sincere as he'd seen her in quite some time. Since their encounter with the Borg, in fact.

"You're welcome, Kathryn. Remember, you're not alone. If you need help with anything or anyone, no matter how large their little lungs may seem, I'm here if you need me. So are the other Senior Officers, Tom and B'elanna, Harry and Tuvok, we are all quite capable of helping with a certain little someone that is already as stubborn as another Janeway we know. Any time you need it just call me." He reached out a hand and caressed the little boy's tiny face. "I'll see you on the bridge tomorrow, Captain."

"Of course, thank you again, for the help and the offer. I'll take you up on it some other time though. Right now I'm going back to sleep." She walked him to the outer room and then secured the door, not so much against intruders, but possible escapees. She returned to the room checked Owen one last time, placing a feather-light kiss to the hairline on his forehead, and then turned in.

Chakotay returned to his quarters and lie thinking about the scene that had just transpired in his Captain's cabin. He'd settled that boy as though he'd done it a thousand times before. It had felt right to hold the child and make him feel secure and loved. He wondered how it had looked to Kathryn, finally dozing off sure that she'd been touched by his actions.

Chapter 8

It was two weeks later that the crew finally settled down starting to accept the idea of their Captain as a mother. Janeway had spoken to her First and Tactical officers about what to tell her crew, and it was officially decided that they need not know the details of Owen's origin, just that he was formally adopted by the captain and was now member of their ship wide family. They'd just recaptured an identity thief two days earlier. That had been potentially disastrous, and now this.

**Computer, shut down Emergency Medical Hologram. Hi there, little guy. I understand you've earned yourself a name.**

"Owen." The toddler on the floor indicated himself and smiled up at where he'd be standing if he were visible.

**And you're learning to speak. That's wonderful. It's time to play a game though. This game is called Hide The Baby.**

"Hide." His little face fell. "Alone."

**I'll stay with you. Sounds like fun doesn't it? I'll just open this door for you. There we go.**

Sickbay's main door stood wide.

**There now. Here why don't you take this along. It'll help them find you later. If they figure out it's missing too. **

"Ssiny." He said as he took the piece of equipment from what appeared to be thin air. The mysterious voice began a, not-quite sinister, laugh, and little Owen toddled himself out the door.

**Hmm, somewhere they won't see you right away. Ahh, of course, one of those Jefferies tubes. That will work nicely. Come on little buddy, we'll see how she reacts to this.** One of the tubes stood open for Owen to enter.

** Let's sit back and watch the fun.** But Owen had other ideas and began crawling down the tube. **Or we could explore. I'll just make sure you don't get hurt and tag along.** Eventually, Owen had had enough exploration of the Jefferies tubes and found a warm, quiet spot to curl up and take a nap. **Well you've certainly been hanging out with humans if all you want to do is sleep.**

The incident had started in Sickbay around lunch time. Chakotay had gotten a summons to join the Captain there.

The doors slid aside to reveal a concerned Janeway speaking to a flustered Doctor. "What exactly do you remember Doctor?"

"Well, Owen and I were learning about the pronunciation of some letters he's still slurring and then I was deactivated. When I reactivated, you were here and he was gone."

Chakotay didn't like the sound of that. "Are you saying you lost Owen?"

"I suppose so. There is a bright side. We know he has to be on the ship somewhere."

Janeway looked scared as a thought struck. "I wouldn't be too sure. Remember that he appeared from nowhere. It's quite possible he's returned to wherever he came from."

Chakotay had been looking around the room for any clues. He found a pile of abandoned blocks out of the way on a pallet in the Doc's office, but no sign of Owen in the entirety of Sickbay. "I'll have everyone take a look around them, if they spot him they'll get in touch with us." Janeway nodded.

"Strange things keep happening around this little one. His arrival, origin, now you conveniently being taken off line, I'm beginning to think someone is playing with us." Chakotay's announcement sounded over the ship's intercom and everyone that was awake at that time began looking around for the wayward boy.

Chapter 9

In the Jeffries tube Owen slept on as the mysterious visitor watched the crew search for him.

** I suppose that it is too much to ask for a frenzied panic from her. So far all she's done is pace the floors.**

"The reports have all been a negative, Captain. I suggest we let the security detail try to locate him, and once we do find him we put a Comm Badge on him and keep it there at all times."

"I agree, Chakotay." The captain was pacing her office, like a caged tiger, while listening to her First Officer. "I'll be glad to know that I'm able to locate him with a single command to the computer."

"You're pretty worried, huh?"

She came to an abrupt halt with her pacing. "Yes, what if whatever brought him here decided they made a mistake. I was just getting used to having him around. I _like_ having him around." Her voice was filled with fear and worry.

"We'll find him, don't think about what might happen. We'll find him."

He stood facing her looking into her eyes with a certainty he hoped was sincere. "It's been at least four hours since he was in Sickbay, how are we going to find him. He's got to be hungry by now, and scared. If he's not hurt." Her worries were getting the best of her and running rampant in her mind, Chakotay could see that, as she resumed her pacing.

"I -" He was cut off by the comm flaring to life. The doctor appeared on screen.

"Captain, I just thought you should know that my portable emitter is missing. I have looked everywhere and quite frankly I just can't find it."

"Chakotay have Harry scan for the metal in the holo-emitter. Owen likes shiny things he might have it with him."

"I guess it's worth a try. I'll get Harry on it right away." Chakotay left her office.

**It's about time they noticed that. Unfortunately this kid hasn't even twitched since falling asleep so that moving target I was hoping for won't be-, maybe it will at that. Owen, Owen wake up. It's time to explore some more.**

"Sweepin'," a drowsy voice replied.

**I know that but it's time to wake up and explore.**

"Tay, uppin'." The little one sat up and rubbed his eyes. He looked around and picked a direction to start off. His mysterious companion followed close behind.

Harry Kim reconfigured the internal sensors and scanned for the Doctor's emitter. The results were almost immediate. "Commander, according to this the Emitter is in Jefferies tube 19 it's just sitting there, no wait, it's moving. I'm sending the data to the search team's tricorders. They should have it and Owen in just a few minutes."

"Thanks Harry. I need to inform the Captain." Chakotay turned to find Janeway had followed him out of her office.

"I heard Commander, and I'm on my way to meet them." That was said over her shoulder as she left the bridge. She made her way to the access panel of tube 19 and found the search team exiting with a red-faced Owen crying his eyes out. "I'll take it from here, gentlemen, ma'am." She stated to the Security officers. "Thank you very much for finding the little fellow." She accepted Owen from the sole female officer of the group, and they took their leave.

"Ssiny," Owen said still distraught, holding up the doctor's emitter with one hand, the other rubbing his eye. His tears were still rolling but his turmoil began calming as she held him securely.

"Yes, it's shiny." She held him closer as relief overtook her. "You gave me quite a scare, little man."

"Hide." He said softly to her.

"Yes you hid yourself very well, but let's not try it again, okay?"

"No hide?" He asked shaking his head.

"That's right. No hiding in the Jefferies tubes. It's dangerous in there."

_**As if I'd let my creation come to harm. Humans and their worries. Oh well, I'd contaminate the experiment if I appeared now, so I won't correct her, and now he'll start to forget I exist. By the next visit I make here he'll think I'm a complete stranger. My plan is still on track.**_

"Otay, Mama, no hide." Owen said snuggling into Janeway's arms.

Janeway felt as if the world had stopped. He'd finally designated her as mother. This was a moment she had strictly refused to imagine over the span of the intervening weeks. She had known that he would associate her as his mother since she would be his primary care-giver, but she didn't know how she'd react to that, and she hadn't encouraged it. Really, as much as she'd hoped to be a mother someday she was a little apprehensive and, she didn't know if she was ready for him to designate her as mother. Now she reacted as any mother would. "Thank you, my little Owen. Don't scare Mommy like that again." His big smile wiped away the remaining worry and she headed to Sickbay to return the doctor's emitter.

"Hungy, Mama."

"I'm not surprised in the least. You've missed lunch, young man." She

kissed his chubby cheek delicately.

"Eat, now?" He inquired.

"After we return the emitter and I hand the bridge over to Chakotay."

"Mander Chotay." He looked around as if to find the Commander. "Not here." A little hand went up with Owen's shrug.

"Right, he's on the bridge." She'd wound her way through the corridors to Sickbay and found the Doctor beside himself with anxiety. "We found them, Doctor."

"Oh thank goodness, I was just thinking of being confined to this room and the holodecks once more, and I think I was about to burst a sub-routine." The anxiety evaporated when she handed the emitter over. "I'm terribly sorry, Captain. You'll have to encode my programming to prevent this type of shut down again." He put the emitter away and returned with a tricorder to check Owen over. He nodded satisfaction when the scans revealed nothing abnormal.

"That won't be necessary. I've done what I can today, I'm going to take a late break until the shift's end. Also, I think that his speech has come as far as it needs to, he can learn the rest on his own. I'm going to keep him with me for the next couple of days until I find an appropriate baby-sitter. You need to be readily available in case of emergencies, and having Owen under foot does not constitute as readily available, not if you have to worry about where he is."

"I hope he gets along well with Neelix."

"I'm not sure Neelix is the answer. He's already got Naomi to look after."

"He's the only crewman that has no emergency duty. His duty is to have a meal ready and to watch over Miss Wildman."

"I know, but I'll leave the decision up to him. I won't force another duty on our cook, morale officer, ambassador, nanny, can you think of any other duties he performs?"

_**Oh come on, force the issue. He's the "logical" choice as the Vulcan's say.**_

"Not off the top of my data base."

"Hum, Mama. Eat." Owen broke into the conversation.

"Okay, Owen, just one minute more. I'm going to ask if he'd mind it, and I don't think he will, but I don't want it to sound like an order."

The doctor was watching his small patient in shock after his designation of the captain slipped. "Of course not, but I don't think he'll take it as one either. Neelix loves children."

"I noticed. Anyway, I want to get Owen something to eat and speak with Neelix. Thank you for the help Doctor."

"Right. I'll need to see him in here at least once a month to be sure he gets the allergy hypos that you needed as a child. We may be in space but allergies find us no matter where we are. His care should be quite easy in that respect. I only have but to follow your own early medical records."

"I knew those would come in handy one day. All right, to the bridge, my little explorer." She waved a hand as she departed with her hungry burden.

"He's already his mother's son." The doctor intoned to the empty sickbay.

The bridge was as calm as it had been when she'd left to get Owen from the security team. The only sounds were from the LCARS and the crewmen doing their respective duties. "Commander Chakotay."

He turned in his chair to look at her where she stood beside tactical. "Yes, Captain?"

"The bridge is yours, contact me on my communicator if you need anything. At the moment I need to speak to you and Tuvok in my Ready Room." Janeway headed in that direction with Owen still on her hip.

Her officers entered behind her and she motioned them to the seats in front of her desk. "Have a seat, gentlemen. I'll be with you in a moment."

She walked over and replicated a small stuffed bear with buckles, buttons and shoe strings to keep Owen busy for the few minutes they'd be here. "Okay, young man, you be a good boy and sit here and play with this for a moment." She set Owen on the deck behind her officers so that she could watch him while they spoke, then went to perch on the front of her desk facing them. "In accordance with the regs I'm informing the both of you that I'm going to activate a new communicator for Owen to avoid this kind of incident in the future. I also want to know what happened today, was it deliberate or a malfunction. If it was deliberate I want to know who was in Sickbay today."

"Personally, Captain," began Tuvok, "I think the decision to activate a communicator is late in the coming, but very logical after today's events."

"Thank you, Tuvok. When can I expect it to be ready?"

"I will inform Security as soon as we finish and they will need you to give them the information to input into the computer. As soon as that is done the badge will be activated. If you give the information to me now it will be ready in one hour."

"Good, just enough time to get some dinner for him. I'm going to take the rest of my shift to teach Owen where, on this ship, he can and can not go. Commander, anything to report before I go?" Owen had apparently gotten bored with the toy and toddled over to the three of them to stand in front of Chakotay looking up at him innocently. The commander absently lifted the boy off the deck as he answered the question.

"No Captain, with Owen found the crisis has ended. I'll have the report on events in sickbay by the beginning of my shift tomorrow."

"Okay then, dismissed Commander." Chakotay nodded as he stood and left

the room, stopping on his way to deposit the little boy next to the bear once more. He smiled back at the captain and then left. "Now, Tuvok," She said when the door had shut, "the information you need from me?" She entered the necessary data into a PADD then handed it over to him. Tuvok exited the room and she moved to sit beside Owen, and settle him in her lap for a moment, where he continued to play with the bear. "Well, little man, let's get to the mess hall, get something to eat, and see Neelix about a caretaker for you." She stood with him in her arms and had the computer reabsorb the bear's energy.

"Eat?"

"Now we eat." They left her ready room and made their way at an easy pace to the mess hall.

Chapter 10

In the Void

_** It's going to be harder to test her attachment now that she can find him with a single command but not that much harder, and he can still catch the reliable children's illnesses that human children have contracted for millennia. Still plenty of possibilities to teach our captain that life should be lived to the fullest.**_

The doors swished open and Janeway entered the half-full mess hall. She ignored the startled looks of crewmen that hadn't yet gotten used to seeing her with Owen, and made her way to Neelix's counter. The jovial Talaxian noticed her well before she came near. "Ah, Captain, good evening. I see that the crisis has ended. What can I get the two of you?"

"I'll have whatever is ready for dinner and Owen wants something that won't upset his stomach. The doctor has warned me away from any Leola root products until he's older, so anything that doesn't have Leola root. How about a small helping of plain cheesy macaroni and a couple of chicken bites?"

"Roni. num." Owen confirmed.

"All righty then, one child-size helping of Macaroni with Cheese and a serving of chicken bites, and a plate of deviled throk with a side of Felada onion crisps smothered in mushroom sauce."

"Sounds delicious. I also need to speak with you Neelix. If you have a moment."

He nodded as he got their plates ready, "Of course, I'll have to replicate Owen's meal, unless you have time to wait."

"No, Owen needs to eat. Go on and replicate it use my rations." She took her own plate and found an empty table to occupy. Owen stood in the chair beside her while they waited for Neelix to bring the macaroni. She kept an eagle eye on the boy standing in the chair banging the table with a spoon. She laughed softly at his antics.

"Here we are, young sir. Enjoy." Neelix set the small plate of round chicken bites and a small steaming bowl of macaroni in front of Owen.

"Hot, Mama? Bhow it?" Owen asked before trying to eat it.

"Yes, blow on it, and it'll cool off." He set about blowing on the noodles. "After today, I think it would be better for Owen to have a caretaker that can't be shut off at some whim. I'd like for you to ask for volunteers on the Briefing with Neelix broadcast tomorrow."

"I would captain, but it's not necessary. Just leave him here with Naomi and I."

"I don't want to over burden you Neelix." She said trying to ignore how Neelix actually looked hurt that she'd considered anyone other than himself to care for Owen.

"Oh, Captain. It's no burden. In fact, it would be a great help. Naomi needs a playmate close to her age, and they'll keep each other occupied while I cook. I think it best that we keep the children together so that they get the chance to play with a living peer rather than a holo-character."

"If it wouldn't be a problem that would solve my dilemma with finding someone suitable to care for him while I'm on duty."

"No problem what-so-ever, Captain. I look forward to it. Any special orders for his care."

"Not really, he's like other two year olds. He's having a relatively easy time learning to talk, still make him use his words. Other than that I have full confidence in your abilities." She smiled over at the mess Owen had made trying to feed himself. "I'll clean that up Neelix. I should have been helping him."

"I'll get a towel." He knew better than to argue with her.

"B'elala," Owen was looking toward the door.

The half-Klingon engineer made her way to their table. "Hello there, Owen. How was your adventure today?" Two big blue eyes just stared at her not grasping what she'd asked.

"Pay game, B'elala?"

"Well, I would, but I need to get back to work, I just took a break for a moment." B'elanna addressed the little one. "Besides there's so much cheese on you I think I'll pass."

"Otay. Eatin' `ronis" He looked proud of himself for making himself understood.

"Actually, Captain, I came to talk to you about some strange readings we're picking up. I don't believe it's life threatening, but it's odd."

"Can I look at them tomorrow if it's not life threatening?" She had taken the towel from Neelix and begun to wipe the table and Owen's face as best she could with him struggling and fighting as small children will.

"Sure, they can wait a few hours. Is there something on your agenda for tonight?" She asked even though she knew full well what the captain had planned. She also knew that the agenda wouldn't take too long.

"Of course there is. Owen. I've been worried sick all day and I'm going to spend time this evening showing him places he absolutely can not go without me." Neelix returned for the dish towel and Janeway relinquished it. Owen had already gone back to the meal this time attacking the small circles of chicken. "I'll help you with the rest, young man." Janeway confiscated the fork that Owen was reaching for once more. She speared a couple of noodles and offered them to her little boy. He ate them off the fork and took a small bite of chicken, and she repeated the process. B'elanna watched for a moment, but finally decided to ask anyway.

"I thought I'd ask if you were going to show up at Sandrine's later on. Tom, Harry, Chakotay and I will be the only ones there most likely and we need someone that can beat the pants off Tom. Harry has the night shift so he can't stay too long we'll need a fourth player."

"I don't know. Sandrine's isn't somewhere I'd take a small child, would you?"

"Normally no, but Tom has agreed that he and the characters will be on their best behavior."

"I suppose I can drop by after Owen's tour of the ship. I want to get him cleaned up first, of course, but it shouldn't be too late when we finish. We'll stop in on our way home." Owen was now pushing the macaroni away trying to climb into Janeway's lap. "All right, if you're done then. I'll have mine and we'll go." She allowed him to crawl across and settle in her chair with her.

"Eat, Mama." He looked up at her from his seat now on the chair in between her thighs. "Num. Eat."

"Have fun, Captain. I'll let them know you plan on stopping in." B'elanna, smiling, stood to go.

"Thanks, B'elanna. Owen, oh!" The little one had taken her fork from the plate and tried to feed her a bite to return the favor, unfortunately the piece of food wasn't secure on the silverware and tumbled onto his clothes before she could catch it. B'elanna chuckled, shaking her head, and made her way back to Engineering.

"Dwop it."

"Oh well, you'll learn how not to drop it soon enough." She kissed the still slightly cheesy face. "I guess this is another outfit that can be reabsorbed to make a clean one." Janeway and Owen eventually finished their meal and headed to their quarters to get cleaned up.

Chapter 11

_** She's taking to motherhood faster than I anticipated. I suppose this is a good development. She show's innovative techniques in the care of the child and in his education of practical knowledge that human children of his age would normally learn at this stage of development. In short, she's still as unconventional as the last few times we've met. The erasure of myself from Owen's mind should be complete now. I'll test that theory out before too long.**_

Janeway explained simply to Owen that Jeffries tubes were not to play in, and carried him into Engineering saying that it was a place that he could not go. He'd been mesmerized by the swirling lights of the warpcore and she'd taken him to the railing so he could get a better look. She'd shown him other places that he'd not be allowed to go on his own, such as the transporter room and the bridge, and now was making her way to Holodeck one to meet the others as she'd said she would. It was still early enough that the two of them passed a number of crewmen in the corridors. She nodded acknowledgment to the crew that acknowledged her. Some of the more brave members of her crew stopping to ask her how she was and play with Owen momentarily.

The holodeck doors opened at her command and she and Owen stepped onto a street in France that was lit by a colorful sunset. The water front wasn't far away by the sound of the waves and the gulls squawking and ships sounding their horns. Janeway walked down the street for a moment and then changed her mind about going straight to Sandrine's. Instead she herded Owen toward the waterfront. She and Owen neared the edge of the street and she showed him the water. She watched as Owen became fascinated by the waves and Janeway wondered at his reaction. Hadn't he seen rivers before. She wasn't sure and surmised that just because they'd found him on a planet didn't necessarily mean he originated there. She decided that she should bring him here to experience different environments. His fascination with the water and the holo-sky compelled her to believe that he'd never seen either before.

"Look at the water, Owen." She pointed to the waves gently lapping at the side of the street. She noticed some steps that led to a small dock for the gondolas she could see out on the water, and decided to show him more. "Let's get a closer look."

"No baf. Not tired." He said intently.

"No, you're right, this is not for bathing in. There's lots of water, see." She had carefully descended the moistened stone steps and now knelt down to let Owen see for himself that it was indeed water that filled the channel they stood beside. "Big wader, Mama." He splashed a little with his hands.

"It most certainly is, isn't it?" She began to understand how Owen must perceive this body of water, at his size it must seem immense. "You bring about a new perspective for those around you, little one." Her voice was awed as she watched him play in the water. Finally, she snapped herself out of it and lifted Owen, who was quite wet from all the splashing, and just as before, carefully ascended the steps back to the street. "Shall we continue to Sandrine's?"

"Go." He clapped his wet hands between them and Janeway felt the misty spray hitting her face.

"We need to dry you off as well." She walked slowly down one street after another as the sky continued to darken. By the time they reached Sandrine's it was fully dark, and the stars were shining brightly above. Not that they could be seen with the city lights around.

Chapter 12

In the Void.

_** Subject exhibits tendencies to steer child in the proper direction rather than discipline. Also an interest in child's previous encounters with different types of scenery and exposure to places other than his home on Voyager.**_

The door to Sandrine's opened to admit both of Voyager's Janeways and the Captain closed the door before descending the steps into the main area of the pool hall and bar. She was greeted jovially by the spitfire bartender and the other holographic occupants of the seedy-looking joint. Her first officer and pilot were in the middle of a serious game of pool, so she didn't expect a greeting from them at the moment. She stepped up to the bar and ordered herself a glass of synthetic wine and handed over Owen's spill-proof cup asking for water. Sandrine served them and she made her way to the table that B'elanna was standing beside watching Tom and Chakotay locked in a duel that was soon to come to an end, by the looks of the contents on the table.

"You two made it. I was beginning to wonder." Harry didn't even take his eyes off of the game to acknowledge their arrival.

"It's not that late. We took a little detour to the water front to look around. Owen's never seen a river, or stars, or sky or anything like that. It's sad to think that he's never seen them, but at least I have the privilege to watch him discover them. I'll have to bring him to the holodeck more often, and show him some different environments."

"Sounds interesting. Maybe I can show him my homeworld sometime." B'elanna had turned away from the game to greet them more officially. "Hello there, Owen." Torres reached out a hand to play with the little boy's chin.

"Belala. Big Wader. Out dere." He pointed over Kathryn's shoulder back the way they'd come. "I spash it." His little arms became animated.

"I've noticed, your shirt is still damp." She lifted him out of Janeway's arms, and the captain rummaged in a bag that had become a constant when she was off duty and had Owen with her, which was all the time. She pulled out a dry shirt and pulled the wet one off of Owen as he curiously touched B'elanna's brow ridges. B'elanna stiffened slightly when he touched her brow, but his face was curious and his hands gentle and wore a softly crooked smile that was identical to Janeway's which put the half-Klingon at ease.

She was further placated and even flattered when the little one uttered "Pwetty." while tracing the ridges with his soft fingers, and his other hand joined the first while his face broke into a full smile. He was as tactile a person as his mother. At this point Janeway re-appropriated Owen sitting him on a table top to change him. She put the dry shirt over his head and pulled his arms through the sleeves. "Who's winning?" The captain asked as she set Owen on his tennis shoed feet.

"Chakotay, surprisingly. It's been a long set, but Chakotay is ahead at the moment. I think we'll be playing doubles as soon as this is over. If he's careful Chakotay could end it now." Both women watched the game intently. Owen toddled around exploring his new surroundings. Harry was just there to watch for this round, he'd have to leave in a few minutes to sit in the `big chair' for the night shift.

_** The officers have apparently gotten used to the new status of their captain, and react as if this is a natural thing that their captain has a child. It is interesting that they aren't more disturbed by the development. Maybe the fact that these officers know her better than the rest of her crew has some merit to it.**_

Owen wandered over to the table where Chakotay was lining up a difficult bank shot. He wasn't aware it was a tense moment, all he knew was that this man was a familiar face in the crowd. He'd lost sight of Kathryn when he'd rounded the table. Owen was a hairsbreadth from grabbing onto Chakotay's leg and ruining his shot when a slender, masculine arm curved around his middle and scooped him off the floor. "You don't want to be responsible for breaking the commander's concentration just now." Tom Paris whispered into the boy's ear. Chakotay made his shot and it ended the match. "Nice. Have you been taking lessons from the captain?" Tom teased.

"No, but I got tired of losing to a lieutenant. Did I hear that there was a saboteur looking to ruin my shot?" He grinned at Owen gripped contentedly by Paris.

Tom laughed. "Only a very small one. Shall we report him to the captain, have him thrown in the brig maybe?"

"No, I doubt she'd agree that it was intentional sabotage." Chakotay joined in the joke and lifted Owen from Tom's arms.

"Mander Chotay." Owen stated with his hands on either side of Chakotay's face.

Chakotay's grin widened into a smile. "That's right little one, and who is that?" He pointed to Paris.

"Tom. He bight wight. Scawy." Owen's eyes had gotten large and he was shaking his head vigorously to show mock fear. Chakotay looked confused toward Tom and the captain where they stood nearby.

"He's talking about the transporter beam, I think. The light and sensation scared the living daylights out of him." Janeway answered the unspoken question.

"That explains it." He returned his attention to the wriggling toddler in his arms. "How was your adventure today? You had the entire on-duty shift in a frenzy looking for you."

"Pway, hide. No hide again. Mama scawed." Owen looked penitent and Chakotay surmised that he'd grasped the concept that hiding was not a good thing to do.

"That's good. What else have you done today?"

"Eat roni's, wif Neewix, and Belala. Make mess feedin' Mama. Got dirty. Mama make cwean. Go walkin'. Not goin' wif no Mama. See big wader. Open door. Talkin' to Chotay." Owen's stilted speech was a tad hard to follow, but Chakotay got the gist of the events of the day. "Want down."

"Well, who am I to stop you?" Chakotay set him on his little feet and he ambled to his mama's side.

"Up." Owen looked at her with his big blue eyes.

Chakotay and the other officers watched as the captain melted into the decks over this little boy. "Up what, Owen?" She teased him with a twinkle to her eyes.

"Wan up, Mama, pwease?" The cute look undid her and she lifted him into her arms.

"You're up, now what?" She asked him. He snuggled close for a moment holding tightly to her making content sounds.

"What that?" He pointed to the cue stick in B'elanna's hand.

"A pool stick, we use it to play this game." She indicated the table.

"Too big." Owen looked dubiously at the tremendous pool table.

"Well, you are a bit small to play. You'll have plenty of time to play when you're older. Right now why don't you play with your own toys." With that she pulled a few of Owen's favorite's from the bag and set him beside them, where he promptly attacked them and scattered them across the barroom floor. It was surprisingly clean for Sandrine's floor. It was usually dirty and riddled with several different alcoholic puddles. Tom really did clean up the place. He had explained that the grit and grime added to the authenticity. He didn't like to alter his programs either. She stood and the adults paired off, guys against gals and played a couple games that way.

The talk of the night was mostly inconsequential. Janeway thanked Tom for cleaning the place up. She was surprised that the sleazy character hadn't hit on her for a dance yet.

The next time any of the officers looked at the time it was much later than any of them had anticipated staying. Janeway looked around for Owen and found him curled up atop the table asleep on the blanket she kept in his bag. Chakotay sat beside him making sure he didn't roll off the tabletop. "When did this happen?" She asked her companions.

"About ten minutes ago." Chakotay answered. "I was holding him during your game with Tom and he dozed off. I looked through his bag and found the blanket and B'elanna helped me make him comfortable."

"Thank you, Chakotay. I guess, I neglected my duty to him this evening." She gathered the scattered toys into his bag and settled it on a shoulder. Then she gently lifted him blanket and all from the table and shifted him to a one armed grip while he burrowed closer to her bosom sighing softly in his slumber. She said her good nights and waved before leaving the tavern. Unsurprisingly, Chakotay found her a few minutes later before she'd left the Holodeck.

"Mind if I join you on your way home? I have that report ready, I can leave it with you." He informed her.

"No, I don't mind, but I have to detour down to security and pick up Owen's Comm Badge. I almost forgot about it. We'll get to the report after I put him to bed." She let him ask for an exit from the program. She assumed that Tom and B'elanna were going to spend a little more time here before turning in.

"No problem, but if we're going all the way down to security could I take some of that burden off your hands it's not very polite to let the captain carry everything when I don't have anything."

"It's not much, Chakotay, really. Besides it's all mine to carry anyway."

"Captain, it's no problem, I offered, remember?" He raised his brows mischievously at her. This was another of his habits that unnerved Janeway, as much as she'd allow it to anyway.

"All right, could you take the bag then. It'll free up my other arm to carry Owen." Her first officer slid the strap down her arm and up his own.

"Better?"

Janeway shifted her grip on Owen and sighed. "Much. Thanks." Chakotay nodded and they continued to pick up Owen's badge in comfortable silence. They made small talk on the way from security to Janeway's quarters, mostly about Owen and his progress with language skills and the adjustments she'd gone through to adapt to the little one's presence.

Chakotay followed her into her quarters to deposit the bag on her couch. He then trailed her into her bedroom and watched her put Owen to bed. She'd taken his advice and had the crib reabsorbed and replicated a toddler's bed for him. It stood against the wall perpendicular to her own bed. She looked like a natural, like she'd been doing this her whole life. Owen was soon settled for the night and Janeway offered a cup of coffee to Chakotay as thanks for his help. He declined stating that they had an early day, handed her the report, bid her goodnight and then retired to his own quarters. Janeway went to bed herself after one last look to make sure Owen was peaceful. She'd read the report in the morning. It was just as well she waited, the report stated that as far as could be ascertained the Doc's deactivation was accidental, apparently on Owen's part, and as to how he'd gotten in the Jefferies Tubes, that was a mystery they weren't likely to solve without a witness.

_** Well things were almost cozy in there. I thought for sure she was going to soften up. I wonder what that Commander was thinking declining her offer. I guess it'll just take a bit longer than anticipated. Soon though, she'll be human again and not all protocol this and that. Owen is working his magic.**_

Chapter 13

In the void the one watching events on Voyager recorded his latest findings.

_** This is rather daunting, Janeway has taken to motherhood faster and easier than I had anticipated. I'm beginning to wonder if I read her right before. Even way back at the beginning I think I've underestimated her emotional situation. It appears that she was telling the truth that her distance is related to duty alone in all areas except one. Her first officer, she lets him closer than any other, yet holds him furthest from her heart. I'm finding this the most puzzling thing about the experiment. Maybe I should throw them together on a mission and see how things go when events turn tragic. I already tried stranding them on an uninhabited planet_

_and the darn crew ruined everything.**_

~After Unforgettable through to the events of the first 2 unseen months of

Night.~

The ship had entered the blackness of this starless space a week previous and things were as uneventful as they had ever been in the last four years. Janeway had more time on her hands than she knew what to do with, and time spent with Owen took up much of the freedom that this region had granted to all the officers of the ship. All the reports had stated, for the past week, was that systems were running within optimal parameters. It didn't take long to read a one line report, even from 150 crewmembers.

Owen's speech had surpassed the level that the EMH had been shooting for, and she'd begun to introduce him to the Holodeck and different environments. His reactions to grass and sand were as satisfying as his reaction to the river had been. She'd decided to show him animals and had Tom help her design a Zoo holo-program. She'd show her Owen his home even if he might never get the chance to see it in person. It had taken the better part of the two intervening weeks, but the program was finally ready.

_**Janeway has begun to integrate human culture into Owen's curriculum. Even if it is a trip to the zoo. Owen has already forgotten his origins here with me and sees no one but Janeway as his parental unit. The First Officer of Voyager is also a prominent figure in the child's life, but then he is in love with the captain. Such a human emotion. It's time for the next phase of the experiment. It was delayed several weeks ago by the appearance of a female that the first officer was apparently involved with. Needless to say that was a part of the study that I didn't expect to see until later, but it went well. The captain was jealous of this woman and the peculiar thing is, she refused to acknowledge that she was, in fact, jealous. At any rate, I hope to begin the last phase of testing before too long.**_

On board Voyager.

She didn't know exactly why she'd asked Chakotay to join them in the Holodeck except that Owen really did seem to enjoy the Commander's company. "How were things on the bridge today?"

"Just fine, Kathryn. Are you going to make an appearance there tomorrow or are you still going to be indulging in the perks of being the captain to spend more time with Owen here." He bounced the little one in his arms as they strolled to the next habitat.

"I'm probably going to indulge. I haven't had much to do and spending time with Owen playing is invigorating to say the least. It's the strangest feeling. Playing is invigorating, but watching him sleep is completely relaxing. Keeping tabs on him is exhausting, but feeding him or bathing him is refreshing. I love every moment of it."

"And to think you didn't know what to do with him when he first arrived." Chakotay laughed, but it wasn't because of the humor he'd tried to impart. He was glad to see how alive his captain looked since becoming a mother. She'd been so wrapped up in getting the ship home that she'd never taken time for herself, to just be. Not be the captain or even be Kathryn, just time to be whatever she felt like being at that moment. He was glad she'd found a way to do that. She looked much happier than just a few short months ago.

"I know. Oh, look Owen. Monkeys." She pointed to the tops of the holographic trees. Above them the trees stood tall and proud as they would in a real jungle. Zoos had come a long way since the Twentieth Century. They no longer implemented bars or cages. It was all natural habitat that separated the populace from the visiting humans or various other races that visited the only remaining live zoo on earth. It was easier to do as they were now and visit a holo-zoo. Less cost for up keep, and no danger of animal attack if one of the crowd did something risky.

"Mokey's swingin' high up there, Mama. They don't fall?" He looked at her questioningly.

"No, sweetheart, they're made to swing in the trees and be high up there." She smiled at her little boy, who was comfortably perched facing forward on one of Chakotay's arms, Chakotay's other arm was around Owen's middle to hold him securely. His little head was leaned back resting on Chakotay's shoulder and he was pointing up at the mammals swinging from the branches. Chakotay was looking up at the tree tops with him and Janeway had to push aside her feelings once again. She found it was becoming harder and harder to push them aside the more time Chakotay spent with Owen and herself. "Lets see, the next section should have snakes and other reptiles." She pulled her thoughts away from her first officer by leading them away from the monkeys.

"Nakes. Ohhhw. Big Nakes, Mama, look at `em." His eyes had gotten even bigger than they usually were as they neared the snake exhibit and he'd almost jumped out of her first officer's arms with his excitement.

Chakotay pointed out a rather large albino constrictor with the yellow and white spotting customary to albinism among snakes and stated, "That one could make a meal of the three of us. Look at him."

"Yes, that one is a replica of the largest python on record, it's a she by the way." She informed with a grimace, if there was one thing that she hated more than the Borg it was a snake. It disturbed her a bit that Owen appeared to be so fascinated by them. "I just hope he never asks to get one of the slithery things."

"No nakes, Mama. Want a wilzard." He stumbled over the l sound, but he was learning his sounds adequately. He squirmed in the commander's arms and Chakotay set him on his little feet. Owen tramped a little further to get a look at the iguana's next door.

"What's the matter Kathryn, don't you like reptiles?" He asked as he noticed her cringe watching the large snake slither through the dank leaves and mold on the `forest' floor.

"Let's just say I'm very glad there is a forcefield between me and this particular hologram. I've never liked snakes and lizards aren't much better. I hope I can placate him with a dog someday." She turned to look for her son. It had taken a little while but she'd gotten used to that term. She'd never dared to dream that someone would call her mommy or that she'd have someone to address as son or daughter, but it had happened, albeit in an unusual way. At this point she couldn't get any happier.

"It's not that bad, he could want a Tiger or worse he'll want a shark." His voice was filled with a grin.

"Don't even joke." She was beginning to relax again as they moved on.

"I've been meaning to ask. Why does Owen still slur some of his letters, and yet at other times the same letter is no problem at all."

"The Doctor says that it's all got to do with the syntax and how he said them before. With snake his hearing misses the 's' sound before the 'n' sound. He says snail the same way, it only happens with the 'sn' sound together. He'll grow out of it. Apparently, I did too. It's a little unnerving to know that he and I are the same person essentially, that in a sense I'm raising myself. I try to forget that little detail, and it's easier now than it was at first. It does make life easier knowing that his likes and dislikes are the same as mine were, so it's rare that I have to clean food that he spit out because he didn't like it, or deal with tantrums about something he doesn't want."

"Kathryn, it's plain to everyone how much you love him." She could feel his eyes on her as she watched Owen looking at the animals around him. "Everyone is happy for you Kathryn. We're happy that you've found something other than Voyager to worry about. I'm happy that you found a little peace."

"Are you saying that I've been overbearing where the ship is concerned?" She looked at him from the corner of her eye.

"Not really, it's just good to see that you're getting out more. Before Owen arrived you barely left your ready room except for meals in the mess or official parties or talent night. Now it's a regular pool night at Sandrine's every Wednesday, informal no matter who's around, dinner in the mess hall almost every night. Some how I think that doesn't bother you too much. You get more coffee if you eat Neelix's fare. Not to mention you got Tom to clean Sandrine's up. Everyone is grateful to Owen for that. Anyway, while you were accessible to the crew, you weren't really approachable, they didn't want to add to your worries, or your supposed worries. Whatever else Owen is, he's certainly gotten you to `let your hair down,' to coin a phrase." He watched her for a reaction. He wasn't disappointed when she stopped to turn and face him.

"Was I really that bad?" She looked shocked.

"No, not on duty. Socially, though, the crew lacked the captain." Her face was pure shock. "It's not all bad, Kathryn. They knew you were busy with the ship, and that captains are supposed to maintain a certain amount of distance. That's all that you were doing. I didn't mean to make it sound so bad, but I did." He apologized. In truth he'd been teasing her, but apparently this was one of the things that had been bothering her, and he did know how much she valued the crew's opinion of her. He remembered when they'd been offered a place with the thirty-seven's. She'd been so worried about who would stay on the planet and who would leave with them. It had been a truly great honor that every member of the crew had chosen to stay with Voyager and Janeway. "You're better than any other Starfleet captain I've met. I know that the other Maquis were impressed as well."

"I tried, well, maybe I didn't. I didn't want to get too close to anyone for fear of loosing them. I don't know Chakotay. It's been a long road, and it's getting harder to stay aloof from all of them. From you and the other command staff too. With Owen there isn't a choice of remaining separated. He depends on me, and I've come to depend on him too, in some ways." Her expression had softened, it was a look that Chakotay saw only when she was thinking about Owen.

"I know, Kathryn." Things were getting too intense between them and Janeway had to get some space. He grabbed her shoulders and turned her back to face him. "Don't build those barriers again, Kathryn, not because I noticed they'd slackened. The new you is as respected as the old you was. This new one is just a bit more outgoing and easier to approach, and we all know how to keep our recreational time off the bridge."

"I know. So do I, apparently." They walked along in companionable silence as Janeway thought about what he'd said. "I do like the new me." She said eventually. "I have much more fun now."

Chakotay threw a friendly arm around her shoulders. "That's more like the Kathryn I know." She smiled as she looked to where Owen had been a few moments before.

"Where did Owen go?" Worry took over her content look as she pulled out of his arm and walked ahead. "Owen!" Her voice rose a bit.

"I right here, Mama." The voice came from around a bend ahead. "I lookin' at big wilzards, Mama." The excitement in his voice brought a smile to Janeway's lips which in turn brought a smile to her first officer's.

"He's found the crocodiles. Come on Chakotay, let's go see some dinosaurs." She then led the way along the holo-dirt path to a swampy area.

Owen was standing with his face as close to the forcefield as he could get it. Neither adult had any doubts that, had the barrier been a glass window, Owen's face would have been pressed against it. It was disconcerting to see him standing mere inches from a carnivorous animal that was capable of swallowing him in one gulp. "A mother's reaction is one of the things I'm having a hard time getting used to. That is a very nerve-wracking sight." She had taken a tight grasp on the urge to rush over and pull him away from the animal. She knew that he was completely safe with the force field and the safety protocols engaged, but an instinct that went back to the beginnings of humankind was hard to ignore.

"Owen, why don't you come over here and stay close to us." Chakotay noticed her tense stance and tightened jaw.

"Okay, Chotay. I stay wifth you." The youngster practically bounced with excitement as they walked up to him. "Look it, Mama, BIG wilzards." Owen pointed toward the Crocodile. Unfortunately he forgot that he was so close to the forcefield. As his finger came into contact with it the reaction startled him and he let out a yelp of surprise, and started to cry.

"It's okay, little man." Chakotay knelt down to his level. "Let me see." He took Owen's finger and examined it seriously even though it couldn't possibly have hurt him. "Hmm, looks like we'll have to see if this needs a doctor to fix it." He used his free hand to tickle Owen's ribs, that elicited a giggle from his `patient.' "Well, I don't think we need to visit Sickbay for this. What do you think?" He asked Owen. The little back straightened and he took a deep breath. "No, I okay now."

Chakotay let out a sigh as he smiled at the bravery the two-year-old showed. "Okay, let's continue then." He looked up to see Kathryn's slightly surprised smile. He smiled back and stood lifting Owen as he did. "Shall we."

Chapter 14

In the void.

_** The first officer has begun spending more time with the subject and Owen. The new development started on the Holodeck as a result of Janeway's desire for Owen to experience more of Earth's culture, but the project has hit a snag. Janeway has begun to exhibit signs of severe depression. Owen has been spending more and more time with his caretaker and the morale officer of Voyager, Neelix.**_

In the Mess Hall of Voyager.

"Owen, get out of the batter. It needs to be cooked first." Neelix's voice carried over the general noise of the crew in the room.

"But tastes good, Neewilx." Again a little finger dipped into the cookie batter that Neelix had left unattended to deliver a special order directly to the table. Neelix caught his other hand before it could disappear into the batter as well.

"Hold it, I think that's enough of helping in the kitchen, young man. Thank you, but why don't you go play with Naomi?" He lifted the boy off the counter and set him on his feet.

"Okay, Neewilx. I go now." He took off around the counter to find Naomi Wildman somewhere in the crowd of stir crazy crewmen. He found Tom Paris before he could find Naomi and settled himself with the helmsman. "Hi, Tom. What doin'?"

"I'm waiting for B'elanna. We're going to play another game tonight." He answered his small friend. "What are you doing here?"

"Wlooking for Nomi. Eated too much batter. Newilx tell go find Nomi. I find you astead." Was the animated answer.

"Where's your mom, huh?" A shrug of his tiny shoulders was all that Tom received as a reply.

"Chotay come soon. He take me home." Tom didn't like that answer. It had been at least a week since the captain had graced the bridge, and none of the excuses that had first been given when she was taking time to spend with Owen, had been heard for as long as two weeks. His thoughts were cut short as Chakotay and B'elanna entered the mess hall.

"Hey, there's my assistant first officer, what have you been up to today, Owen?" Owen bounced around on Tom's lap holding his hands out to the Commander. Chakotay lifted Owen into his arms. He smiled as the little one snuggled close and hugged him, humming his content as only Owen could, he hugged back for a moment then listened to Owen's answer.

"I pwlayed wifth Nomi. I helped Neewilx cookin'. I pwlayed wifth Harry. I talk to Sevin of Nine."

"I'll bet that was enlightening." Tom and B'elanna joined Chakotay in a chuckle.

"I go home now, Chotay?" The look on Owen's face was mostly hidden from Tom and B'elanna, but the sad eyes that Owen gave him almost broke Chakotay's heart.

"That's where we're headed right now, little man." Chakotay bid the other officer's a good night and went to thank Neelix and gather Owen's things. "See you tomorrow, Neelix. Thanks again."

"Commander, can I speak with you for a moment?"

"Of course, let's either go in the kitchen or out in to the corridor though, it's loud in here." As soon as they were in the quite privacy of the corridor Neelix began.

"I'm worried about the captain. Owen has been getting harder and harder to handle. I did some research on behavior changes like this and generally there has to be something really wrong at home for a well behaved child like Owen to start acting the way he has."

"What has he been doing, Neelix?" Chakotay glanced at the boy in his arms.

"Well, he usually gets along with Naomi quite well, but this week he's started to fight with her. She avoids him, Commander. Naomi has never done that before. He hasn't been listening to my instructions, and has been completely uncontrollable for the last week." Neelix didn't sound angry so much as extremely worried.

"I'll have a talk with him, but the captain's home life is none of my business. Thank you for the concern though, Neelix." Chakotay left with out another word. He was definitely going to have it out with the captain now.

The door opened and shut without Kathryn's acknowledgment. Owen didn't even go to greet her where she stood at the view port staring out at the absence of stars. The little one just stood and watched her for a few moments before heading to his toy chest. He knew she'd come and play with him as soon as the commander left. Chakotay shook his head at the scene, he remembered a few months ago doing the same thing only it was with bewildered happiness instead of the sadness that threatened despair he felt now. He decided to give his report for the day before talking to her, and before that he was going to get Owen into a bath so that if this conversation turned into an argument he wouldn't be privy to the raging emotions in the room. So, he turned and left Janeway without saying a word. After

getting Owen in the bath he returned and gave the daily reports ending with the radiation detected by Seven and Tuvok.

"It's probably nothing, just some background Theta Radiation, but it could mean there's someone nearby." He was all business for the moment.

"Distance?" He noted the almost desperate tone with a pang.

"Approximately, twenty-five light years." She didn't even turn to face him as they spoke.

"It's a long shot, but alter course" Her tone had changed to apathy.

Chakotay felt himself faltering in his resolve to confront her about his concerns so he steeled his resolve. "Yes Ma'am."

"If that's all commander." She was impatiently dismissive.

"Actually, I'd like to make a request. I've been saving up my Holodeck rations, and I've got three full hours coming. Any chance I might persuade you to join me for a few rounds of Velocity. It'll help clear your mind." He kept his tone light and friendly.

"My mind is perfectly clear." She said with a hint of anger.

"Then what if I told you I'm not leaving `til you join me." He challenged.

"I'd say have a seat. It'll be a while." She countered.

His anger at her continued aloofness almost got the better of him. "Then I'll be blunt, you've picked a bad time to isolate yourself from the crew. This ship needs a captain, and Owen needs a mother, especially now.

Janeway spun around at his last statement and he could see her anger clearly across the darkened room. "You leave Owen out of this discussion. It's about your concerns. Owen is just fine." She visibly calmed herself and crossed the room as though to confront him, at the last moment she turned to give her attention once more to the void, and now sounded taunting. "Would you be satisfied with I'm just catching up on some reading." She sighed, resolved to having to talk to him. "I'm not sure I understand it myself. It started when we entered this, what does the crew call it?" She turned to look at him waiting for an answer.

"The Void." He supplied for her.

A long hard exhale, "charming." Her voice was oozing sarcasm. She reached up and began to rub her face as she continued speaking. "Ohhh, what I would give for a few Borg cubes about now. Anything for a little distraction, strange as it seems, I almost long for the days when we were under constant attack. No time to stop and think about how we got here." She turned her head to speak over her shoulder. "How did we get here, Chakotay?" Her voice was now filled with a challenge and she turned to face him with an aggressive stance. When he didn't rise to her bait she commanded, "answer me."

Chakotay now stood uncomfortably and if Janeway had had to describe the look on his face then it would have been pensive and reluctant. "We were faced with a difficult choice." He finally began. "We had the means to get home, but using it would have put an innocent people at risk, so we decided to sta-"

"NO, no," she interrupted him, "I decided to stay. I made that choice for everyone."

"We're alive and well," he cut her off, "and we've collected enough data about this quadrant to keep Starfleet scientists busy for decades. Our mission's been a success."

Her voice was quieter now pensive herself. "You're saying words that I've been telling myself for the last four years, but then we hit thisss.." she dragged the word for emphasis, "void and I started to realize how empty those words sound-"

"Kathryn!" He tried to cut her off to say something to prove to her she was wrong, but she'd have none of it and continued yelling over him and her hand and arm movements became choppy and agitated.

"I made an error in judgment, Chakotay. It was short sighted and it was selfish, and now all of us are paying for my mistake." Her voice lowered dangerously, and Chakotay really began to worry. "So if you don't mind, Commander, I'll pass on that little game." She crossed the room away from him to where she'd been originally looking out the view port. "I'll leave shipboard morale in your capable hands. If the crew asks for me, tell them the captain sends her regards."

Chakotay became confrontational now crossing to where she stood. "Should I take over Owen's care too because it feels like I already have, Kathryn."

"I told you to leave him out of this."

"How can I? How do I know that he's getting proper care with you. Neelix has expressed concern over Owen's behavioral changes. That generally indicates a problem at home. Maybe it's the lack of interest in the child by the parent." He goaded her.

She took the bait this time and came into this yelling. "How dare you say that?! What gives you the right?! I have nothing but love for my son, and he is the only thing I'm really sure of right now. I'm sure that I love him dearly and that he's the only thing bright in this `void' of a life. Watching him play or sleep or anything is all I do anymore. I thought that if he continued to spend time in the mess hall it would make my dark mood easier for him, apparently it hasn't, so if you would be so kind as to tell Neelix I won't need him to watch Owen for a while that will be all." She turned from him and the view and entered her room closing the door behind her. Chakotay waited for a while before going to the door and knocking.

"Kathryn."

"Leave, Chakotay, Owen and I are busy. Go rest, you'll need it to run the ship tomorrow." He decided that was the last he'd hear from her and the only thing he did hear were the muffled sounds of Owen's splashing in the bathtub.

"Fine, you win, Kathryn." He let himself out.

After she heard the door close behind him she opened her bedroom door. Owen was in her arms, wrapped in a towel, wet hair plastered to his forehead, subdued and quiet for the moment. She half hoped that Chakotay would still be there. She longed for anything to get her mind away from the feelings she was experiencing. She sighed at his absence.

"What wrong, Mama?" Owen's wet hands pulled her face to look at him. "You mad at Chotay?"

"No, baby, Mama just doesn't feel well." She kissed his forehead.

"Doctor make better. You go see him." Owen stated practically.

"No, The Doctor can't help, but you can." She planted a feather-light kiss on his nose, taking comfort from the smell of him. He smelled of the lilac add-in Chakotay had used in his bath water, baby powder to dry him and keep him from getting a rash, and he smelled of Owen, he smelled like her baby and she was comforted by a mere thought of her little boy.

"How I help?" He asked breaking into her thoughts quietly. He looked eager to assist her in any way he could. She wondered if she was making him uneasy, but the twinkle in his eye said no, while the balled little fists holding her shirt said yes. "Mama, how?"

"Give mama lots of good hugs and kisses." Owen's arms went around her neck and he hugged for all he was worth. When he broke away he gave her a sloppy baby kiss and burrowed against her humming his satisfaction to be home. "Oh thank you, my Owen, let's get you some pajamas on and play for a little while. She turned back into her room and seated him on the top of her covers. She pulled a shirt over his head and his underpants and pajama bottoms up his legs. She then set about drying and brushing his soft hair. He sat still and held tightly to her the whole time she dried his hair and she smiled fighting back her tears. By the time his hair was dry Owen was sleeping soundly, but he still held her desperately as if he knew something wasn't right with her.

When she tried to settle him into bed he squealed in protest and she hurriedly lifted him back into her arms. She knew Chakotay was on the other side of the bulkhead and she had decided she didn't want him back here after all. So she draped Owen's blanket around him and went back to her sitting room. She settled in her favorite reading chair and rested Owen on her stomach and chest letting him sleep while she felt as if she were drowning in the darkness both from without and within.

It was some days later that she was sitting in the exact same position dozing herself that the power died and she jumped into action. She had Owen in one arm and a phaser in the other as she headed for the larger weapons down in security. She grabbed a weapon and headed for the spare power cells in the cargo bays with Owen in one arm and a phaser rifle in the other. She ran into Chakotay and Neelix before she got to the bay. Kathryn handed Owen to the Talaxian instructing them to follow her. She then continued on her way to the bay and engineering to find out what the problem was.

_** I'm getting rather alarmed. Janeway has completely lost all interest in her ship and her crew. Owen seems to be her only link to happiness. She is amidst a deadly depression. If she hadn't fallen to Owen for happiness I might have terminated the experiment prematurely. She's started to come out of it a bit since the aliens attacked them. She didn't like that at all, but now it seems she's become determined to be a martyr. Oh, thank goodness, her crew has mutinied and reminded her that they and Owen need her. Now, oh good, they've found a way out of this endless dark and saved that race in the process. I'll hold off on the last phase of the experiment for now and let her get back to normal.**_

Chapter 15

On Voyager

They'd been out of the void and back to normal for quite some time. They'd birthed and raised a Borg Drone. They'd conquered B'elanna's depression, as effectively as Janeway had conquered her own, with the help of Chakotay and the distraction of building the Delta Flyer, and negotiated the beginnings of a peace treaty with Species 8472. Currently Tom Paris, Ensign Wildman, and Tuvok were on an away mission that wouldn't be classified as a risk normally, but they were in an area that was experiencing ion storms that seemed to be growing in severity.

Kathryn Janeway was in the process calming her rambunctious son down for bed

when she was contacted by the bridge.

"Yes, what is it?" She asked over Owen's play.

"Captain, the away team has not reported in yet. Commander Chakotay suggested I call you to the bridge." Came the voice of one of the night shift bridge

crew.

"I'll be there as soon as I possibly can." She signed off and gathered a pajama clad Owen in his blanket. She hadn't gotten out of her uniform yet and was still presentable, miraculously. She gathered what he might need, not forgetting the spongy Flotter toy that Chakotay had given Owen when he'd first come on board, and headed for the Wildman quarters. Neelix would be there with Naomi. Owen latched onto Flotter and held tightly, while chewing on the soft, rubber hands. Janeway made a mental note to see the doctor about Owen tomorrow, he'd begun to chew on the toy more and more and he was generally in a state of crankiness. She had suspicions he was getting a new tooth. She filed the thought away as they reached Sam and Naomi's home.

The Talaxian greeted them and graciously accepted the now sleeping toddler and asked what was happening. "There may be a problem with the away mission. Don't worry just yet. I'll let you know. For now just take care of the children. I think Owen may be teething again so be prepared for tantrums, and thank you Neelix."

"You're quite welcome, Captain. Don't worry they're both in good hands. I know just the thing to help Owen out." Janeway kissed Owen a last time and left the room. Neelix settled Owen into the bed beside Naomi.

Janeway entered the bridge in time to hear Chakotay's last call for a command staff meeting. "What did I miss?"

"We can't raise the away team. Their last transmission was a distress call. I've called a staff meeting and sent the Doctor to sit with Naomi and Owen while Neelix attends the meeting." She nodded and left him to his pre-meeting preparations. She knew that if she demanded the whole story now, she'd delay the meeting and the actions that may save the lives of the away team. Besides if the doctor was going to be with them he could check Owen to be sure he wasn't coming down with something, she could contact him while she waited for the officers and Neelix to assemble.

In the void.

_** The predicament that Janeway's team finds themselves in allows for an unexpected observation for my study. One of the missing crew members is the mother of Voyager's first child and Janeway must be starting to think of her own mortality and what could happen.**_

Aboard Voyager, Captain's quarters

Janeway had overseen the preparations of the search and rescue team and stayed on the bridge to keep an eye on things; she'd only left long enough to eat breakfast with Owen, and learned that he was indeed teething. The Doctor informed her that he was getting his first molar, which was why he'd been so temperamental. She had then returned to the bridge to wait for word, and taken her lunch there.

She'd had an argument with Neelix earlier in the evening about Naomi's predicament. She'd claimed that humans generally identified with Naomi's situation. She, now, almost wished she didn't identify with the little girl's possible plight. After her argument with Neelix, Chakotay had beamed back aboard to get more supplies and ordered her to get some sleep. She'd collected Owen from Neelix's care and was now sitting beside him watching him while he slept peacefully in his own little bed. She knew that it was going to take a serious toll on her psyche if the away team was found dead. Not only would Naomi lose her mother, B'elanna would lose her newly discovered love, and she herself would lose a very dear, very long time friend. The aspect that she hadn't expected was the worry that had surfaced when she thought of what would happen to Owen if she were ever in the same position as the away team.

This thought was what was keeping her awake to watch her Owen sleep. She wondered what to do to prepare for that possibility. She knew that he'd be well cared for here aboard Voyager. She just couldn't stop thinking about it. Her mind had drifted off into the horrible possibilities again when Owen grimaced in his sleep she reached over to caress his cheek with the backs of her fingers, he sighed and stretched lightly calming once more. She smiled at his serene repose and finally decided that she needed to sleep. She lifted him from his bed gently and carried him to her own, lie them both down and curled around him then she let his even breathing lull her to sleep.

She next awakened to a summons to the bridge it was late morning. She gathered Owen out of the bed and had the computer locate Neelix. It stated that he was on the bridge, so she took Owen to her ready room and settled him on the couch leaving his comm badge on his person, and setting protective pediatric forcefields around him so that if he did wake up he wouldn't hurt himself. She then entered the bridge and took her seat. Chakotay was reporting what they'd found so far, and it didn't look promising. Neelix was beside and slightly in front of her watching the proceedings. No one had noticed the half-Ktarian girl exit the turbo-lift as the team was delivering it's report, until Neelix turned and saw her. The way he said her name as he stared at the girl had quite a few of the crew feeling uncomfortable. Janeway was quickly out of her seat and ready to comfort the girl, she felt guilty that she hadn't pushed Neelix harder to tell her, but Naomi was returning to the lift, and Neelix was frantically trying to catch her.

"I'd hoped to avoid this." Janeway stated as she settled back into her seat for the rest of the reports. She then went to check on Owen and lowered the forcefields in favor of leaving her ready room door open. This was against every regulation, but it was an emergency. By the time anything decisive came through Owen was back in Neelix's care. Janeway was able to re-collect him before Samantha was out of surgery so that Neelix was free to escort Naomi to greet her mother. Tuvok and Tom were already back on duty, and Kathryn was in her quarters with Owen and Chakotay going over the day's reports before dinner. She and Owen had just returned from the holodeck where Naomi and her mother were playing a Flotter story.

"What's eating at you, Kathryn? I know that look." Chakotay had been watching her watch Owen for the last five minutes.

"I was thinking about how close Naomi came to loosing her mother, and what might happen to Owen if something were to happen to me. It shouldn't be a big thing but I've never had to think about someone else in that context. He depends on me for his care and security. I am someone's mother, and the oddest thing about it is I already knew I was his mother. This has just made me feel that wonder I felt a few months ago when he called me mama for the first time. I'd forgotten how amazing it is, and it took this crisis to make me see it again. It's just been weighing heavily on my mind. I wasn't worried about him, but for him. Does that make any sense?" She turned to look at him.

"Yes, I had similar thoughts myself, Kathryn, but you shouldn't worry. He'd be very well taken care of. The crew adores both of Voyager's children. There'd be a lot of disappointed crew members lined up to take him in, and it wouldn't be out of a sense of duty to the captain either, although it might be a small part. Owen has won the hearts of quite a few of your crew, Captain. The Delany sisters dote on him when they see him. They seem to think he's a ball the way they pass him back and forth. Rumor has it he's even had a similar effect on Seven."

"Why would they be disappointed?" She was puzzled by his earlier words and pulled him back to it.

"If something happened and you couldn't take care of Owen I'd be the first one to step in as his guardian. I don't want to scare you or sound bizarre, but Owen is like a son to me Kathryn. I'd do anything for him. I love him as much as I've loved anyone in my life, probably more so. I'd do anything for Naomi, but I'd move heaven and earth and the stars for your son. He's helped me to regain something that I thought I'd given up." Chakotay's voice was heartfelt and his expression was dead serious. She smiled through misted eyes and impulsively hugged her first officer.

"Thank you, Chakotay. It's not bizarre, and how could it scare me that you love him. I know you Chakotay, and I'd rather you than, say, Tom be his father. You are such an inherently good person, I want Owen to be that way too." She stopped thinking how that had sounded, but Chakotay didn't acknowledge her tension. He was watching Owen try his little hand at coloring a drawing. She watched for a moment as well and let the tension drain, but for some reason she could not force herself to disengage their embrace. "How did you do that?" She pulled back finally.

"What?" He looked at her warily.

"Know exactly what to say to dissolve all my worries on this."

"It's a gift, and I know you." His voice had lowered as he watched her, again watching her son. His tone prompted her to look up and their gazes met. Her breath caught in her throat, and Chakotay shivered slightly. Just as things really began to get serious between them Owen toddled into the middle of their laps stating he was hungry and demanding food. The moment broke and the tension between them dissipated. Both smiled shyly at one another.

"I'll get us some dinner." She rose and they returned to their earlier ease.

"Okay, Owen and I are going to wash up." He lifted the little one and headed for her bathroom.

_** Oh, so close. Owen you really shouldn't have interrupted, but at least I know that they are ready for my last phase. Well, I guess that it would be prudent to wait a bit and give them a chance to calm down after this crisis.**_

Chapter 16

Janeway sat in her captain's chair wondering what it was that had been happening lately. She'd been relaxing more and more in her resolve to keep to protocol in the relationship between herself and Chakotay. She wondered why. Protocol just hadn't seemed so important recently. She'd wanted to kiss him so many times now that she almost wished they had so that the frustration would end. She'd have to get him away from everyone else for a change. So far every time they'd started to act upon these impulses the kiss had been interrupted before it began by either a com call or a crew member, but mostly they'd been interrupted by Owen. She was convinced the boy had radar against kissing.

Abruptly her thoughts were interrupted by a sense of foreboding. It was as if something were terribly wrong. She called for a sensor sweep of the area of space they were traveling. When Harry reported nothing in the area, Janeway settled back and tried to chase down the feeling. Just as she decided that she'd imagined it her com badge chirped. "Sickbay to the captain."

"Janeway here, go ahead Doctor." The feeling was getting stronger.

"You are needed in Sickbay Captain." The hologram's voice was tense and distracted as though he was working and talking at the same time.

"Has there been an accident, Doctor? Are there any injuries to report?" Maybe it was the fact that she'd started to worry about an unknown feeling that made her respond so, maybe it was the fact that she'd been thinking of something other than duty, but she shook her thoughts and the nagging sensation off to pay more attention to what was being said.

"There's been no trouble in that sense that I'm aware of, but I am informing you now that there has been a problem in the mess hall. It seems that something the crew ate is making them ill, and to warn you ahead of time the children have been affected as well." The doctor sounded distracted, and the sense of foreboding came back to Janeway full force, and finally she honed in on it's source. Owen.

"I'll be right there Doctor." She was out of her chair as she said this and leaving Tuvok in command of the ship. Chakotay was right behind her, his face as worry filled as her own must be.

The scene in Sickbay was startling to say the least. Ten crewmen were seated on the few bio-beds and chairs in the room. Naomi Wildman was prostrate on one of the bio-beds in the outer area of the infirmary holding her mother's hand. She looked ill, her skin was pale as though nauseated and the monitor beside the bed showed that she had a low grade fever, but Kathryn didn't see Owen anywhere, until she found the doctor in the surgical bay. Owen was on the bio-bed there under the diagnostic apparatus. His skin was paler than Naomi's and his little lips had a disturbing blue tint to them. She could see that he was unconscious at the very least. "What happened?" The voice that asked didn't sound like the Kathryn Janeway that everyone in the room had heard before. This was the voice of a frightened mother.

"Apparently, some of the spices that Mr. Neelix used in the evening's meal reacted badly to one another and the result was toxic for the crew."

"I thought that the captain ordered spices and such scanned to prevent that from occurring." Chakotay stated as he watched the captain approach her child. He was as upset by the boy's appearance as she was.

"They are, and they were. I scanned them myself. I'll conduct an investigation once I get everyone stable. The adult crewmen have fared better than Owen and Naomi. Their size is mostly to thank that they aren't more affected. Naomi apparently didn't like the dish and only ingested a few bites, but Owen was a different story." Neelix interrupted here.

"As I told the doctor, he didn't eat much for lunch and I guess he was hungry because as soon as the evening meal was ready he was asking for a helping. The stew was still hot but he was getting cranky and I thought that if I made sure to cool it down and gave him very small portions at a time it would be okay. He had two helpings before the crew started theirs. In all I'd say he finished a normal sized bowl of the stew, Captain." Neelix swallowed nervously when she turned her attention to him. "Owen was the first one to get sick. I brought him here immediately. Then the other's started to come in as whatever happened, well, happened."

The doctor took over for Neelix at this point. "I examined Owen and ascertained that it was food poisoning, but he was reacting strangely to it. Normally, one will begin to regurgitate the food and along with it the toxin. Owen was wheezing as he took each breath but showed no outward signs that his reaction would deteriorate into serious respiratory distress at that time. I was a bit puzzled at first, then discovered that he was not only reacting to the toxin but also experiencing an allergic reaction to something in the food. At that point, Naomi's fever spiked and I had to administer a hypospray to counter it. When I got back here, Owen's lips were blue and he was barely breathing. I put him on the respirator and he lost consciousness. I've gotten him stabilized, purged the remaining food from his stomach, and had Neelix bring me a sample of his stew. The computer is analyzing it now."

"What about Owen? How is he now?" Her voice was still filled with terror. Chakotay stepped up closer to her and put comforting hands on her shoulders. It was a testament to her worry when she didn't pull away, but instead let him comfort her.

"As I said he's stable and I'm waiting on the analysis before trying to treat him for the allergy and the toxin. That is why they are here too." He indicated the other crewmen. "They are all awaiting treatment." He turned back to the results that were starting to trickle in from the analysis. "Ahh, there's our problem."

"Can you treat it?" Chakotay inquired annoyed when the doctor didn't go into detail.

"Yes, this is quite easy to treat. I'll need to administer a hypospray to all of the affected crew. We'll start with Owen. The allergy is untreatable at the moment. The medication I need to use to render the toxin benign will interfere with the medication that I could use to counter his allergy. I would suggest that you not ingest this particular condiment either Captain. I don't need two critical care patients in here." He had been preparing the hypospray as he'd rambled on and administered it to Owen and Naomi before he'd finished speaking. Immediately some of Owen's color returned, and Janeway let out a sigh of relief. She reached up and squeezed the fingers of Chakotay's left hand in gratitude, then stepped to her son's side.

She delicately caressed his tiny ashen cheek. "I'm here, my Owen. Mommy's right here." She didn't notice when Chakotay and Neelix stepped away to give her some privacy. All her focus was on the tiny form on the bed. His lips were still discolored but not as badly as before. The doctor returned to her side before long.

"Captain, I can't administer the Allergy medication for a period of twelve hours so that the toxin has completely disappeared from his system." She nodded her understanding. "That means he'll be staying here until he's completely stable. He's safe for now with the apparatus monitoring and, if necessary, controlling his breathing and I'm recommending that you get back on duty. I'll call you if there's a change."

"I'm staying with Owen." To punctuate the statement she turned to Chakotay. "You've got the bridge for the next twenty-four hours, at least, Commander."

"Yes, Ma'am." He turned and crossed to a chair then carried it over. "Here Kathryn. You're going to be here a while, you might as well be comfortable."

"Thank you, Chakotay." She sat down and continued to watch the inanimate child on the bio-bed, so different from his usually happy and playful demeanor. Chakotay watched for a second and then left with Neelix to get the events on record. "Doctor, what caused the food to go bad?" She asked after they'd gone.

"It wasn't the ingredients themselves. They are all compatible to each other and the diverse physiologies present on board. The problem arose from one of the other spices that Neelix used. It must have gotten damp somehow because it had started to mold. The fungus is what caused the reaction between the different constituents in the stew. You, and Owen, are allergic to the ferelinas spice that we picked up on the last supply stop. We'd never encountered this spice before so there was no way to know that you were allergic until we tested it. I'll admit that I hadn't gotten around to it yet."

"That's okay, but why hasn't Owen woken up?"

"His body is fighting the allergy with all it's got, it's easier for this to happen if Owen is inactive or asleep. He should wake up when I counteract the allergic reaction."

"Should?" Janeway looked up at him with all the intensity of a mother and a captain in Starfleet.

"Yes, should, if something else happens he could slip into a coma, but I seriously doubt that will happen." The doctor tried to sound as firm and encouraging as possible in the situation.

"But he is going to be okay?"

"Yes, he's already improved greatly. He may wake up before I estimate. It wasn't the toxin that prompted this unconscious state. It was the fact that he couldn't breathe properly. I'm going to check on Naomi and write up my reports for the other patients. I'll check back here when I'm finished if nothing arises." At her nod he left the surgical enclosure. Sam Wildman entered a few seconds later to allow the doctor to work and see how Owen and the captain were she returned to her own child before long and Janeway was left with her thoughts. Janeway sat beside Owen watching him, sometimes speaking to him, always holding his hand, three hours later the doctor came back to check on them. He informed her that Owen was still improving, and that she needed to get rest herself. Again she refused to leave him. Eventually, Chakotay returned and pulled another chair over.

Chapter 17

In the Void.

_** I turn my back for one day and my whole experiment is in jeopardy when I return. Owen is unconscious from some type of poisoning and an allergic reaction. The bright side is that Janeway has turned to her first officer for support in this matter. I almost went down there and interfered, but the child is improving and I think I'll sit and watch them for a while.**_

Around the tenth hour after the doctor had counteracted the toxin in Owen's blood, Janeway had dozed off with her head touching the bio-bed holding her son. Chakotay sat watching over them both. Owen, himself, began to stir by the eleventh hour and Janeway stood as soon as the whimpers reached her slumbering ears and awakened her. She moved into his line of sight and soothed him softly. "Shh, it's okay. Mommy's here, Owen. Just a little longer and you'll feel better."

Meanwhile, Chakotay called to the doctor, as he watched the captain's stress abated slowly. He could actually see the muscles in her neck loosen.

The EMH appeared and took some readings. "The toxin is completely absent from his system, but he still needs the respiration monitor. It hasn't been breathing for him for some time now, but I don't want to leave it to fate that he'll stop breathing again if we remove the monitor." He got a nod from the captain. The wait was almost over.

"At least he's awake now." It was all she could say, the relief she felt was so overwhelming.

_** I wonder what would happen if...**_

Without warning Owen's eyes drifted shut again and the monitor started screeching for attention. Janeway did a very un-Janeway-like thing and panicked, "What is that?!"

"I don't know. Owen, open your eye's. He's not responding to voices," he looked over at a monitor, "respiratory distress. Back away please." The doctor moved to Owen's side as Chakotay forcefully pulled the captain away from the bed. The respiratory stimulator came on and the alarm stopped blaring. With the doctor busy Chakotay was left to deal with the hysterical captain.

"Kathryn, calm down! The doctor is with him. Stop fighting me, the doctor needs room to work right now. It's going to be all right, he won't let anything happen to Owen. Look at me!" That got her attention finally. She stopped struggling and sagged into him as the adrenaline left her while they watched the doctor work. After a few minutes the activity calmed and the doctor beckoned.

"Doctor what was that?" Her distress over Owen's reaction gave her voice a harsh edge that made Chakotay's heart ache with a need to take her pain away. "I'm not sure. He was stable, in fact, I was about to say he may not need the allergy medication. I'll be administering it after that for certain. I've stabilized him and he appears to be just fine, but I would have said the same thing before this attack. I can't find anything that would have prompted this." His voice was puzzled as he turned back to his patient. "He's sleeping now, Captain. I suggest that you get some sleep yourself."

"I'm not leaving unless Owen is going home with me. If you want me to sleep then make my son well." Her voice had recovered and there was as much steel in it as either the Doctor or Chakotay had ever heard.

"I will make this an order Captain. Please don't make me."

"You can try to order me to bed, you can escort me out of this room, but I can assure you that I will be standing in the corridor outside until Owen is out of danger. I will be court-martialed before I leave my son." She had pulled violently out of Chakotay's grasp and stood fully erect as if she were a cadet in front of an inspection board, but her posture held nothing of the nervousness that cadets were subject to. Janeway's posture was a threatening challenge. She was asserting her rank privilege and refusing to move.

"Kathryn," Chakotay put a gentle hand on her upper arm. "At least let's take a break. The doctor needs a little time to check Owen over. I know you missed your evening meal and suspect you didn't have lunch either. Accompany me to the mess hall, have something to eat. You'll do no good if you collapse from a lack of nutrition." He saw her start to protest his suggestion. "You're already exhausted, Kathryn. If you don't eat something you'll be in the bio-bed next to Owen."

The tension in her posture uncoiled and she visibly relaxed. "All right. I'll get something to eat, and I'll be back as soon as I'm done, and the doctor will inform me immediately if anything changes." Her tone held a threat as did her look at the doctor.

Once in the deserted, at this late hour, mess hall Chakotay confronted her. "That was uncalled for, Captain."

"Chakotay, I'm not the captain, not right now. Not when all I can think of is the way Owen looked when I walked into Sickbay this morning. With his lips blue, not breathing that I could see, like a rag doll. I ceased to be the captain at that moment, and became only Owen's mother. That's why you were on the bridge all day. I wouldn't have been capable of making a command decision. When he is better then I will be the captain again."

"I won't argue with you there that is one image that is going to haunt my dreams for weeks to come. Kathryn, I am trying to understand why you just tore into the doctor for expressing concern for your health."

"Because next to Owen's health, my own means nothing to me. You said that you felt like a father to him, if that were true how could you not understand that I'd rather he be healthy and I be the one in Sickbay turning blue." The strain of the day was showing clearly on her face and Chakotay decided that he shouldn't argue with her now. He really did sympathize with her situation and took a moment to ponder her words. `How would I react if it were my child?' He wondered. `The same as she is.' A small voice stated in his mind and then he understood.

Kathryn stood trying to collect her self when her friend sighed, "I'll replicate some dinner, find us a table with a view."

He caught the stirrings of a smile before her face fell again and she walked over to their regular table. When Chakotay got to the table he was surprised to see tears in the captain's eyes. He set the food on the table and seated himself beside her. "What is it, Kathryn?" She turned away and tried to regain a little dignity.

"A few weeks ago I was worried what would happen to Owen were I to be killed. Now I wonder what would happen to me if that were to happen to him." Her voice was ragged as she tried to hold her fear and her tears at bay. "I don't think, I would make it if anything happened to him. I can't tolerate even the thought of losing him." Her voice trailed off as two tears raced one another down her face. Chakotay didn't wait to see which would reach her chin first. He pulled her into his arms and held her for as long as she'd let him, trying to remember that she was hurting and afraid. That to do anything but hold her in comfort would be taking advantage of her. So, he let her calm and pull away when she'd composed herself. She didn't speak again, but began eating. She was finished before him and left him in silence with a touch of her palm to his cheek in thanks for his actions. He understood.

The sight when she entered Sickbay this time was quite the opposite of the earlier scene. Owen was awake and wailing his discontent. He was still lying prone on the bio-bed, but he was awake. "Doctor."

"While you were out I gave him the second medication. He's back to his vocal self." The EMH disengaged the forcefield holding Owen in the bed and the distraught child rolled onto his stomach and pushed himself off the bed onto all fours. Tears streaked his face, and a bit of drool crept out his mouth to drip on the bed as he continued to scream. If they'd noticed his tantrum had wakened Samantha who had been sleeping next to Naomi.

For all of a full minute, Janeway couldn't move. She rejoiced, eyes closed, in the loud shrieks emanating from her Owen. Chakotay entered and touched her shoulder. The contact brought her to her senses and she crossed to the bio-bed. "Owen," came the whisper. She looked at the doctor for confirmation that she could lift him off the bed. As soon as it came she gathered him into her arms. "Hey there, it's okay now, my Owen. It's all right. You're okay. I've got you. We're okay now." The crying continued but it wasn't as severe as it had been and the start-stop breaths that come with a hard cry accompanied his gentler sobs. Janeway's tears had returned, but these were tears of relief.

"Thank the Spirits." Chakotay watched mother and son together. Once Owen figured out who it was that held him he quieted and grasped her uniform jacket burrowing his face into the front of it. Janeway calmed as Owen did and hugged him tightly while kissing and nuzzling the fine red hair gracing his skull with the side of her face, and shooshing him quietly. She sat herself down on the chair that was still beside the bed and cradled Owen rocking him until he'd fallen into a natural sleep. She looked up at the doctor then.

"Doctor, I'm sorry for earlier. I was scared for him and I took it out on you. I'm the captain, I shouldn't do that."

"Really, Captain. There's nothing to apologize for. You were acting as a mother would, protecting her young. I can't hold that against you. Doubtless, if it had been Naomi instead of Owen, Samantha Wildman would have acted the same." He smiled his sincerity, and caught Sam's nod over the captain's shoulder.

"Thank you, Doctor, for taking care of him. When can he go home?"

"It was my pleasure. I'd like to keep him until tomorrow afternoon, just to be certain he'll be okay. I'm moving him off the critical list and into the main area of Sickbay. You are quite welcome to stay so long as you get some sleep too." This time his voice was firm. He wasn't going to tolerate resistance and she wasn't prepared to give any.

"All right, Doctor, so long as I don't have to let go of him." She sounded exhausted even to herself.

"I'm not even going to try to make you." His voice held a compassion that was seldom heard from the self-righteous hologram. "The bio-beds aren't huge but I think that any of them could hold the both of you. In fact, Ensign Wildman and Naomi are quite comfortably sleeping on one of them now, or were until Owen made his recovery known." He escorted her out of the surgical area. One of the bio-beds was occupied by Sam Wildman and Naomi, Sam smiled at them showing relief that Owen was okay, another bed held a crewman that had continued to complain of pain after the toxin had been neutralized. The doctor had discovered that the crewman had been suffering from more than food poisoning and was monitoring his condition.

Janeway carried her son over to another of the beds and handed the boy to Chakotay as she settled on her side on the bed. She beckoned for him and Chakotay set Owen into her arms. She kissed the soft cheek and smiled at the sleep sounds he made. These she was familiar with and further reassured her that he was okay now. The doctor stayed long enough to make sure they were settled and then deactivated himself for a rest cycle.

Chakotay sat beside the bed watching the captain watch her son. The look of peace there made the ache from before recede. When, finally, the ache was no more, Chakotay stood. He placed his large gentle hand on Owen's forehead. "Sleep well, Owen." He looked from the boy's face to the mother's to find her watching him. "Sleep well, Kathryn." He leaned closer to them and finally, delicately kissed Owen's forehead. "Take care of your mother, Owen. She needs to rest now." He addressed Owen, but Janeway knew he was pleading with her to rest, to get well herself. He looked back to her and then turned go.

"Chakotay," her low voice brought him to a halt, "thank you too, for caring, for staying, and for understanding. I have never had a better first officer, nor a better friend than you've been today. I'm sorry I caused you whatever grief I did today."

He crossed back to the bed and put his hand on hers where it rested on Owen's side. He squeezed her fingers. "Get some sleep, Kathryn. We'll talk later." He then, boldly, kissed her forehead as he had Owen's moments before. He left the room, and before the door had completely shut behind him Janeway was fast asleep curled around the clone that had become so much more to her than just a clone.

Chapter 18

Back in the void.

_** I've been convinced that Janeway is firmly attached to the child Owen. She has show great distress over his recent illness. I wonder if it would be a better study if _

_I were to leave the boy with her and continue to observe for several years the impact his presence has upon her interactions with other people. Her command ability has changed, but little. Her decisions are as they always have been. Utterly unique to Janeway herself. I've delayed the last test of the experiment so many times that I doubt a few more years would change the outcome. I think that if the boy were taken now, Janeway would fall to her first officer for comfort, that possibly strengthening the relationship between the two to something more. I will need more time to decide.**_

"Captain's log, Stardate -.-" Kathryn Janeway began the recording of her thoughts on the past few days aboard her ship as she sat with a cup of coffee in her ready room. "Since the Slipstream trip the spirits of the crew have been higher. Even the problems and crises that we've dealt with in the last weeks hasn't daunted them in the least. I, on the other hand, am probably the least favorite person to grace any on or off-duty gathering of the crew. First my sanctioning the use of Cardassian techniques to separate the alien being from B'elanna, then Tom's insubordination and incarceration for thirty days and subsequent demotion. There has been a rift between the pair and myself for quite a while now. I have not gone to a gathering at Sandrine's for over a month.

"Kashykk and his betrayal were hard for me to deal with simply because I allowed my self to feel something for him. I should have taken Owen's dislike for him at face value and not gotten involved. Children can see through a deception faster than a Borg will assimilate a new species.

"On the bright side, a recent encounter with photonic beings has bridged the gap between Ensign Paris and myself to some extent. I had the pleasure of taking part in his Captain Proton scenario, my role was Arachnia, Queen of the Spider People. I admit I was dubious of the part at first, but it was amusing to see what the crew does in their off time. Unofficially, I'd like to try it again sometime. Other shipboard news really nothing of interest to report. The crewmen and the children are fully recovered from the food poisoning scare, and Owen is as happy and healthy as before. He's the main reason I regret that a few members of the crew are upset with me, he misses his time with them when we don't go to the Sandrine's pool nights.

The decision to allow the doctor to remember the events of his insanity and helping him through the feelings of guilt over the death of Ensign Jetal, were rewarding personally. It helped to remind me how to deal with my own feelings of guilt over Jetal's death. It also prompts questions as to the Doctor's level of sentience. He expressed feelings of guilt and self-depreciation. He berated himself over the choices he made. It makes me wonder if his intelligence is in reality artificial. I find it hard to decipher that line between artificial and organic intelligence. I'm just glad he came back to himself quickly. I was in my quarters for two days with a cold that Owen had been so kind to share with me. If the doctor hadn't gotten better I would have been confined to quarters for at least a week. How Owen catches a terran cold out here is just beyond me, but he did and it's gone through almost every member of the crew now. Owen's finally walking more steadily too. I don't worry that he'll fall into a low table every time he takes a step, and I no longer feel the need to cringe when he takes off running.

"That's another thing I've been puzzled about with Owen. The diversity of his development has me at a loss. Looking back over family records, my own development was normal. I learned everything that I should in the order that I should. He was two years and possibly some months old when he arrived here. I have no idea the actual date of his creation, but its been six months since he arrived here so he must be three by now. At any rate, he arrived fully capable of using the bathroom facilities on his own without prompting and there were no accidents, even if I did put him in diapers at night to be safe, but he didn't have any. Yet, speech was virtually non-existent. He had no knowledge of environments other than Voyager until our sessions in the Holodeck, and the few times I've taken him down to the planets where we've enjoyed shoreleave. He walked as though he'd never before used his legs, yet his mental development was mostly normal for a two-year-old. I've been assured by the Doctor that he's at a perfectly normal stage of development now, and despite the mysteries and the confusion surrounding him, I'm thoroughly enjoying my son's presence."

_**I may as well get on with it. I can always leave him here and observe while he grows.**_

Janeway had just ended her log recording for the day and was preparing for the end of her shift. She'd just contacted Neelix to have him get Owen ready for her arrival when the feel of the room changed. There was a slightly malevolent feeling present and the air seemed thicker. She knew this feeling, and she was curious of the difference of the feeling she recognized. It was more playful now than it had ever been before. "Q, it's impolite to enter a room without knocking." The omnipotent being appeared on the couch.

"Sorry, Kathy, really, but I didn't want to arouse suspicions as to my visit."

"Speaking of your visit" her voice held thinly disguised disdain "why are you here?" She joined her hands and rested her forearms on the desk in front of her awaiting his answer.

"You have been wondering about a certain small member of your crew." He raised an eyebrow in her direction watching her startled reaction from the corner of his eye. "You have a few questions about him. It could be that I know the answers."

Janeway gasped at his offhanded mention of Owen. She pushed down the shock and tried to appear stern and professional. "Exactly how do you know that. Have you been hanging around again, Q?"

"You could say that I have a vaulted interest in this member of your crew as well." He knew precisely how she would react to that. He was not disappointed when the protective maternal instinct was evident in her statement.

"I don't see how Owen, that's his name but I'm sure you knew that, is any of your concern, and I suggest that you loose interest in him quickly." The last was full of threatening overtones.

"Oh, Kathy, don't you worry your pretty, red head about it. I'd never let anything happen to my little creation." That revelation shocked her beyond belief for a moment and there was silence.

She recovered enough to sound breathless and bewildered. "It was you." She stood to her full height abruptly, sending her chair crashing backward, as she called for security.

"Kathy, calm down. I'm not here to do harm, not really. I'm here to answer your questions. Some of them at least."

"You are not going to threaten him in any way." She stated resolutely with a hand instinctively where her phaser would have been had she been wearing one.

"Please, as I said, I'd never allow harm to come to him, and yes it was me."

"Why?"

His lips pressed into a thin line. "Can't answer that yet. I'm still working on some things that deal with that question."

"Is this a test of some kind?"

"I'll tell you as much of the reason for this as I can. I wanted to see how you would react. I wanted to know if you were really that cold calculated captain that you tried to appear, or if you were capable of being a mother, a woman and not a superhuman."

"As to the other wonderings of your little mind, Owen didn't speak well because he had no need for speech when all he had to do was think of what he needed or wanted. His ability to walk was undeveloped because he spent all but that last day in a growth chamber. I taught him the basics of walking that last day. I then dropped him off beside your officers, the ones doing all the loading. How did I get him you ask?

"Well, my captain, there was a half hour a very long time ago in which you disappeared from this ship. It was discovered upon your return that you had little more than a headache and a scrape on your hand. I took blood, skin and hair samples from you that day. That is what your Owen is made of. He grew at the normal rate of a human. His insertion into your life had been approved by the continuum for that date which you found him. I'm afraid I got a little antsy though and sent the two-year-old clone into the future instead of waiting for him to turn three. Oh, and Kathy, he's your clone, his birthday is May twentieth. Same as yours."

"You are the most-" She was furious but still she thought 'he isn't three yet after all. Not for almost three weeks.'

"Now, now, Kathy. No need to get nasty. You adore the boy after all."

"Yes, I do. I love him with all my being to be exact, but you still had no right to create him. That was an arbitrary action that he will most likely suffer for. What will happen when he asks where he comes from? How do you tell a child that he is a clone? It's wrong, that's why the practice was outlawed. He, no one should be put through that."

"Please, Kathy, he'll be fine as long as his mother reminds him that he is loved. I could always take him away if you don't want him. I suppose I'll have to find someone else, oh I know. That Doctor Crusher woman that Picard refuses to love. She'd be happy to have another child I'm sure. Possibly the councilor, Troi."

"NO!, I didn't say I didn't want him. I said that it wasn't right for you to arbitrarily create a child and deposit him in someone's lap. What if I hadn't taken him into Voyager's population? What if I'd followed that stupid decree that all clones should be destroyed? What would you have accomplished?" She stood before him with arms crossed.

"Please Kathy, you have the largest sense of duty in this quadrant. I knew you wouldn't leave him behind. Now, I know you have one of the biggest hearts in this universe and it's out of the question for you to leave him or destroy him. I think that even if he'd been a different species you'd have taken the boy in." He watched her remain stoic visibly, but he read her feelings and knew he'd surmised correctly.

"Why the charade? Why not tell me about him before?"

"If I'd told you about him before, then I'd have contaminated my own experiment." He looked at her like she should know these things.

"Is that all he is to you?" She looked and sounded annoyed.

"I'll admit that it would be better if he were, but no I find I actually like the kid. He's a lot of fun. That day in the Jeffries tube he explored more of this ship than I'd have thought he could. He did all the climbing and walking, well crawling, to get to tube 19, by himself. I only made sure he didn't hurt himself too severely."

Janeway looked furious. "You've been interfering. Did you poison him too?"

"No, I did not, I did however turn my attentions elsewhere that day, and I did cause the unexpected problem that day just as he was starting to get better, but that was just to see your reaction. I truly don't wish him harm, but your reactions were a very nice addition to my research."

The captain made an exasperated noise and exited her ready room. She joined a group of crewmen, who were going off duty, in the turbo-lift and stated her level preference. She could still feel Q following her, she wondered if she'd be able to see him if she turned around. She doubted it.

The lift let her out on the level of the mess hall, and she strode purposefully toward it. She hoped fervently that Chakotay would already have joined Owen there. He'd agreed to meet her and Owen for a dinner debriefing of the day's events, and she hoped he'd decided to get there early. Relief flooded her as she entered the room. Chakotay was indeed there and Owen was perched on the Commander's shoulders. From his vantage point he spotted her before the commander did.

"Mama! Put down, Chakotay." She watched him squirm and hastened to get there before Chakotay could set him on his feet. She wouldn't feel better until he was in her arms. She reached Chakotay's side and took possession of Owen just as he was being lowered to the deck.

"Commander, are we ready to eat?" She sent him a look that he knew all too well. He nodded and indicated that she should lead on. Her relieved sigh put Chakotay on guard, but he was silent as she thanked Neelix and ordered her and Owen's meal. They walked over to a table after Chakotay had ordered, and Chakotay became uneasy with the way she wouldn't even put Owen down in his own chair to eat. He felt a heaviness in the air and could see the nervous set to her jaw.

"Kathryn, what's wrong?" She looked behind him and he turned as well. The sight of the being he knew as Q, with his customary smirk and waving in his Qish way, was unsettling to say the least. "I see." Janeway's tension drained a bit when her first officer was able to see the being. Something told her he was here to do more than fill her in on Owen's missing details. They finished their meal and headed toward her quarters. She sighed in relief when Chakotay put himself between her and by extension Owen, and Q.

She opened the door to her quarters and let Chakotay precede her. She then shut the door in Q's face. "Now, Kathy, that wasn't nice." His voice projected into her living-room. He turned, back against the door in the silent corridor, and decided to give them a moment.

Inside the room was another matter, as soon as the door closed Kathryn sat on the couch with Owen standing in her lap as she looked him over. "Are you okay, sweetheart?" The little one nodded solemnly.

"Who that?"

"Who, Owen?" Chakotay asked hoping the boy hadn't seen Q.

"Man outside. Following."

"His name is Q. You don't remember him?" Kathryn answered her son's question. Chakotay looked surprised for a moment at her question but then the revelation dawned and he looked as worried as she felt. Owen looked reflective as though he was trying to remember something beyond his grasp.

"Don't know him, Mama. Where he from?" With his head cocked to one side and an inquisitive look on his little face Janeway thought, briefly, how much he looked like her father.

"He's from a far away place. He's just visiting, I hope." She pulled him closer and held him to her. "Owen, Mama needs you to sit in her lap and be a good boy, okay?"

"Okay, Mama. What wrong?" He sounded as worried as a two year old could possibly sound.

"I'm just a little unsettled, baby. It's okay." She tried to reassure him. The room's adult occupant's heard a disembodied voice then.

"Good work, Kathy, keep him calm, and there's nothing to worry about. As I said I'm not going to hurt him. I'm here to answer your questions and I want to check the progress of the memory purge, on my last visit I set a command, of sorts, in his brain to erase all memory of myself. Please, may I come in and talk to my crea..., ahh, the child?" He corrected quickly.

Janeway's expression darkened to malice. She looked to Chakotay, who shrugged. "Chakotay, stay here and ready a phaser." She'd come to an abrupt decision.

"I doubt it would do any good, Kathryn." Chakotay looked dubious.

"No, it probably won't but it will let him know we mean to protect Owen at all costs. He's not going to threaten my son, I don't care if he is omnipotent." There was an asperity to her voice. The tone made Owen nervous, Chakotay noticed.

"Easy, Kathryn. I'm ready." She noticed he'd retrieved the Phaser she kept hidden in her quarters, just in case they were boarded while she was off duty. She nodded and Q appeared in the room.

"Hello Chuckles, don't shoot. I'm unarmed." The playfully irritating tone infused the room. "Ahh, there he is. How are you doing, my boy?" He advanced toward Janeway, addressing Owen. He knelt lightly in front of them and continued talking to the boy, as Janeway tensed.

Owen startled, when Q approached, her little boy turned around in her lap to hide his face, as small children sometimes do in the presence of a stranger. Q watched in fascination. "Just as I suspected, good work, Owen. I can see that the mother/son bond between you is very strong. I'm sure you'll miss him." Q said as he stood, and in the blink of an eye, with a flash of light Owen and Q disappeared. Janeway stood in fear.

"NO! Oh Gods!" Janeway's startled shout cut into the quiet room as she shot off the couch trying to retain her grasp on Owen.

"Computer, locate Owen Janeway." Chakotay called out.

"Owen Janeway is not on board Voyager." The emotionless voice stated coldly.

Janeway slapped the com badge on her chest. "Janeway to the bridge. All stop! Do a sweep of the area. Look for anything out of the ordinary. Look for Q-like life forms, and Owen's bio-signature. The commander and I are on our way."

"Aye, Captain," came the slightly confused voice of the ensign on duty. With that she was on her way to the bridge, Chakotay trailing closely. The trip to the bridge seemed to take hours the tension was so thick between them. Janeway's fear was palpable. Finally, they arrived and the doors opened wide. The on-duty commander of the bridge stood to relinquish her chair, but she waved him away and headed for the sensor station on the starboard side of the bridge.

"Report. Have you found anything?"

"No, Captain. What am I scanning for anyway?" He asked as she moved over and took control of his station.

"Commander, go to red alert. Get the senior officers back here."

"Yes, Captain." The ensign made the announcement and waited to be relieved of his position.

Chapter 19

In a void, Owen's cries of fear can be heard.

_** Man they weren't kidding you have quite a large capacity for air. Let's see, we are turning down the volume. There, much better.** The Owen's wails silenced even though it was clear that he was still screaming at the top of his little lungs. **Oh, calm down. I'm not going to hurt you. I just want to see what will happen. I'm only going to keep you here a little while. Look you can even watch them from here.** He waved his hand in front of Owen's little face and a screen of mist appeared. On the screen Owen recognized the bridge of Voyager, and his shrieks really did quiet this time. "Mama. Chakotay. Take home, now." He said, his voice thick with tears, turning back to the strange man that seemed somehow familiar. "Who you? Want go home." His sniffles were almost enough for Q to comply, but he wanted to see the outcome of this test. _

_"I am Q, my friend. I'm going to take you home but not yet. I won't let anything happen to you. I promise." Out of thin air a couch appeared and Q plopped down resting on it comfortably. "Come sit down and watch, Owen." He gathered the frightened little one into his lap and they watched as Kathryn Janeway pushed herself past exhaustion trying to find little Owen. _

_"Mama!" Owen started bawling again._

_"Oh, me oh my what have I gotten myself into." Q stuck his fingers in his ears to drown out the sound.**_

"Commander Chakotay, it's been thirty-seven hours since the captain had any rest. Before that she went for seventy hours. She is making herself ill. It would be prudent for her to get some sleep and then continue to search for Owen. I have tried to approach her with this logic, but she refuses to listen." Tuvok sounded as upset as a Vulcan could. The two of them, along with the senior staff, except Seven Of Nine and Captain Janeway were in the briefing room for the day's staff meeting.

"How would you be acting if one of your children were taken by a Q, Tuvok? She's scared to death and she's worried about Owen, and she's not going to stop looking until she drops from exhaustion or he is returned. I've tried to get her to sleep too, but Owen is too important to her for her to give up easily."

"It might be wise to inform the doctor and have him sedate her. It may be the only way to get her to calm down and look at the situation from a different angle. She's trying to locate a Q, and we don't know anyway to do that." Kim said meekly. It was apparent that he was worried about the captain. They were all weary.

Tom spoke up then. "I wouldn't suggest it. We'll have to deal with her when she wakes up and she won't be a happier person just because she's had a little sleep. She'd be harder to live with. Look how she reacted when her body shut her down last time. I don't know which of the on duty officers was happier to see her head for astrometrics this morning, and she only slept for twelve hours. If she keeps going she's looking at a total shut down and she'll be out for as long as it takes her body to heal."

"I agree. Let her look for as long as she can then we'll take over when she's out." B'elanna put in her two cents. "I do think that someone should keep an eye on her though. Someone she trusts with Owen as well as herself. I think that covers anyone in this room, but I think that the best choice is either of the commanders. She's known Tuvok longer, but Chakotay, you can provide an emotional sounding board that Tuvok probably can't. Besides I think you have as vaulted an interest in finding Owen as she does, you're just handling it differently. It's pretty much up to the both of you though."

Chakotay, of course, volunteered. "Where is she now, Tuvok?"

"In Astrometrics with Seven. She surmised that Seven might have some ideas to help locate Q by using Borg technology." Was the monotone answer.

"All right then, dismissed. Tuvok you have the bridge. I'll be in Astrometrics." The meeting dispersed and Chakotay made his way to Seven Of Nine's duty station in search of Captain Janeway.

The doors opened and Seven turned to greet the commander. Janeway didn't turn from her current study of the star charts in front of her. At present her theory was trying to prove that there was some sort of pattern in the locations that Q had appeared to them. Seven explained this to Chakotay softly.

"Any luck?"

"No, there is no pattern in the appearances of this being. I believe Captain Janeway is desperate." Seven's cold assessment could be proven as true with the least bit of effort. All one had to do was look at Kathryn's face and see the fear driven determination that barely masked the utter and complete devastation and exhaustion.

"You would be too, Seven." Chakotay moved to the captain's side. "Kathryn, have you made any progress?"

"Some, but nothing that will help us locate Q or Owen." She sounded detached and didn't even look in his direction.

"Have you taken a break yet? You really should eat something and get a little sleep." He was testing the waters to see how far he might get this time.

"I'm not tired and I most certainly am not hungry." So, he wasn't getting anywhere then. Well, damned if you do and damned if you don't it is then. "Kathryn, Tuvok and the rest of the senior staff have threatened to go to the doctor, you need to take a break. I've held them back for now, but I agree with them. You need to, at least, get something to eat. Come with me. We'll go to the mess, bring something to work on if you like, but make a point of coming out of this room and getting a meal." He was pleading and he knew it.

"I can't, Chakotay, not right now." She ignored the concern and continued tapping in commands.

"Kathryn, please. We're all working to find him, but you need to take a break before you breakdown." He was surprised when she turned her attention on him. She looked haggard and the worry was beginning to take it's toll on her sanity.

"Chakotay, working on finding him is the only thing keeping me from breaking down right now. If I stop that's it, I'll lose it. I'm not ready to lose it. I need to keep going right now." The tiny voice that spoke seemed to emanate from a little girl rather than a captain in Starfleet.

"You may not be ready to loose it Kathryn, but it's well past time. He's your son, it's okay for you to lose it. It's the natural response," He motioned for Seven to vacate the area quickly as he captured Janeway's attention with this statement. He knew he was stepping out of the frying pan and into the fire, "Spirits Kathryn, don't you care?" He was goading her and he hated to hurt her like this but it had to be done or they'd lose her as effectively as they'd lost Owen. Someone had to pull her back to reality and take the brunt of her anger and pain. Who better than the man that loved her?

The smoldering anger in her eyes proved that it was wise for him to send Seven out. None of the crew needed to see the breakdown he was provoking. Her almost defeated posture disappeared, and became defensive. "Of course I care! WHY do you think I haven't been able to eat or sleep in a week! What would you have me do, give up, on my little boy. What kind of mother would I be! What kind of mother am I that I let him be taken in the first place?" Chakotay grimaced at her pain.

"Kathryn, you didn't let Q take him. We did what we could against the being and with his powers that is just not much. We didn't have a chance, Kathryn."

Janeway took two aggressive steps toward him and presently collapsed in exhaustion. Chakotay caught her before she hit the deck. He reached across her back to slap his communicator.

"Sight to sight transport to the captain's quarters." The beam consumed them and they reappeared in the captain's living room. He rearranged her and carried her into her bedroom. Laying her on one side of the bed, he rolled the covers down on the other. He then pulled her boots off and removed the outer jacket leaving the Starfleet issue turtleneck shirt and pants on her he finished rolling the bed clothes out from under her, and covered her with them. He then called the doctor and requested he come to her quarters.

"She finally shut down then." Were the first words from the doctor's mouth when Chakotay admitted him.

"Yes, check her and make sure she's okay." He was worried about his friend, his love. "Let me know how she is. I'm going to the mess to get something to eat. Yes, I intend to bring a plate back to her." He cut the doctor off anticipating his statement.

"I was going to say you might want to wait. The captain may be asleep for quite some time. She will need someone here when she wakes I imagine. She'll be upset. She's experiencing almost the exact same thing as when Owen was sick a few weeks ago. The mother trying to protect her young has been replaced by a mother searching for her young. This is stronger, and knowing Captain Janeway she'll be angry at herself when she does wake up. She gave in to her body and lost, what she thinks is, precious time that she could have used to look for Owen."

"I'll stay here tonight. I know her as well as anyone and I'm here. I'll be right back." He made his way out of the cabin as the doctor went to the captain's side and checked her condition. When Chakotay returned he informed him of the diagnosis.

"It's as I thought Commander. She is suffering from a lack of food and sleep. She'll be out for a while, I prefer that she sleep as long as you can possibly allow her to. She is to eat as soon as she wakes and if you can get her to return to bed after her meal it would be good for her. Reassure her that Tuvok and B'elanna and the rest of the crew have taken over the search for Owen."

"The captain is in good hands, Doctor. Thank you." The doctor merely nodded and returned to Sickbay leaving Chakotay alone in the captain's cabin with her sleeping the rest of the day away in her bedroom.

_** Well, it looks like she really does care. Little guy, your mom is one determined lady." _

_"Mama falled. She sick? Doctor can make better." Owen was standing against the mist screen with his little hands pressed to it looking over his shoulder at Q sniffling with worry for his mommy. _

_"She's just tired. She's been looking for you for almost five days straight, I guess that proves that the mother son bond is as strong as I thought."_

_"Go home now? Want go home, want Mama." The little voice was showing signs of distress._

_"None of that, Owen. It won't be long now. Just a couple more days." Again Owen began to howl his objection at staying here. "Oh, wonderful. If there wasn't a purpose for this I'd have given in two seconds after arriving here.**_

Chapter 20

Captain Janeway had slept for twelve full hours, awakened long enough to eat what Chakotay brought her, but weak as she was from lack of food, eating tired her out again and she subsided in to slumber for another twelve hours. Chakotay stayed with her the entire time, sleeping on the couch when he was tired and keeping up with reports from the regular shift crew and the search team and watching over her when he wasn't tired.

"How long have I been out?" The first words from her mouth in twenty-four hours and they weren't unexpected.

"An entire day, Kathryn." Chakotay supplied looking up at her from where he sat at her dining table. "You need to eat more. Doctor's orders." He added quickly at her look.

"I can't, I need to keep looking, I already wasted twenty-four hours sleeping that I could have been searching." She moved into the room despite her denial, and sat at the table. Chakotay was surprised he'd anticipated a lengthy struggle.

"Not wasted Captain. We continued to search while you slept. Unfortunately we found less than you did, but I suppose that every theory we negate is still making progress. In it's own frustrating way." He informed her as he brought some coffee and a plate of food.

"I suppose so. I just wish that I knew more. How do you contact a Q? Should I just yell out, `Hey, Q, get your omnipotent butt out here.' Somehow I don't think that will work."

"You'd be surprised at what might work." Chakotay spun to face the new, decidedly feminine, voice. "What is it that you want mortal? I'm quite busy."

"Mrs. Q?" Kathryn stood.

"None other. Come on, what do you want?" The tone was annoyed.

"Do you know where your husband Q is, or what he's been up to here?" Chakotay asked in answer to her question.

"Yes, he's in his void somewhere. Said he was conducting some new research. I generally don't bother him when he's in there. It keeps him out of my hair." The statement was matter-of-fact. "Although, if he's the cause of this, I may need to monitor him more carefully in the future."

Kathryn spoke now. "I assure you he is solely responsible for this. Settle in and I will tell you the whole story."

"Afraid I don't have that time. Is there a condensed version?"

"He kidnapped my son." Janeway was short and to the point.

"That's condensed enough for me. Q? Get out here now! Husband, don't make me call again."

_** Oh, drat, and damn it all. She had to bring the wife in on this. I'm in for it now. Especially with that imperious tone.**_

"Coming, dear. I just have to tie up a few loose ends here." His voice echoed in Janeway's cabin as though he were calling from the bathroom or out in the corridor.

"You had better have a young mortal with you." The matronly command could not be ignored, and on Kathryn's sofa Q appeared. Owen was in his lap. As soon as the being appeared Owen started to fight and squeal in protest to the hands that held him. "Release him, Q." Her voice was filled with venom.

"Yes, dear." The hands holding her little boy fell away and Kathryn fell to her knees. Owen came to her crying his little eyes out, scared as could be. She gathered him close and held on tightly, shooshing him softly and cooing to him, and crying herself.

"Thank you, Mrs. Q. We've been looking for him for over four days now." Chakotay watched the reunion of mother and son for only a moment, proffering to give the captain her privacy, and knowing that she was unable, at the moment, to extend the shared gratitude herself.

"Think nothing of it. He should know better." The russet haired woman turned to her husband. "You should know better. It's wrong of you to take a child from his home. What if that were to happen to little Q? You'll just have to stay out of that void for a while. I can't get a moments peace between you and your son."

`She brings new meaning to the term nagging wife.' Chakotay thought.

"Watch it, I may have to start on your shortcomings. You don't want that."

He wondered how she'd done it, but answered her promptly. "No ma'am." The female Q went back to berating her husband and they faded from view. When Chakotay turned back, Kathryn was still sitting on the floor rocking Owen and sobbing with relief, murmuring words of comfort when she could. "Is he all right, Kathryn?"

"He seems okay. I'll take him to Sickbay to be sure. I'm sure the doctor wants to see me anyway." She tried to rise, but Owen's weight and the way he sat on her lap made the movement awkward and she gave up finally and asked for the commander's help. He reached out to take Owen temporarily and his little body stiffened and he latched onto Kathryn crying out for her to help him. "It's okay, Owen. It's just Chakotay. I'm right here, and I won't let anything happen to you again. Go to Chakotay and let Mommy stand up."

"No! Stay with you. Don't wanna go, Mama! Don't wanna go." The distress he was emanating pierced her heart. Chakotay pulled his hands away and let his own tears fall.

"Okay, my Owen, okay. We'll stay here a little longer. Shhhh. It's okay, we're

okay." She soothed him as his sobbing started again.

"Here, Kathryn. Let me help." Chakotay walked behind her and gave her leverage to stand without letting go of Owen. "Better now?"

"Yes, thank you, Chakotay." She still rocked Owen from side to side, bouncing gently hoping to calm him. "I think we'll stay here a little while though, give him time to feel comfortable again." She turned her attention back to her son. Chakotay noted her taking inventory of her little boy, he had all his fingers and toes, and no cuts or bruises that she could see.

In that moment he lost his control over his urge to hold them and engulfed both Kathryn and Owen in his arms. "It's okay now, Owen. You're Mama has you. We're on Voyager and you are very safe here." He kissed the little head buried deeply against Kathryn's neck. The boy's face would hold the mark of the lapels on the robe she wore. He stood there a long time holding them giving support to both whether it was wanted or not. He felt them both shaking against him, they were purging the tension and fear of the past week. Eventually, he left them to call off the search teams, and give them some time alone.

The captain and Owen, in due time, made a trip to the doctor. He ordered another day of rest for her and declared Owen as healthy as ever. He also explained that Owen would most likely experience separation anxiety for the next few weeks. It wouldn't be pretty when she returned to duty, but it was best to deal with it now. If she tried to take more time to spend with him it would get harder and harder for her to leave him. He'd throw fits but he'd ultimately go back to being the same Owen as before Q's stunt.

A few weeks later, Chakotay found them in the Holodeck with Naomi Wildman. Naomi was introducing Owen to Flotter, but Owen was being a spoilsport and wouldn't leave his mother's side. She knew why he was doing it, but it was frustrating to watch. He wanted to go and play with Naomi, but he was scared to let Kathryn out of his reach let alone his sight. He'd gotten better in the familiar routine of her bridge shifts. He no longer cried when he was left with Neelix, or other familiar members of the crew. He'd readily go to Chakotay or Tom or B'elanna. He was still getting used to Harry and Samantha Wildman, but he spent a lot of his time with Naomi and loved to play with her. Kathryn had decided that he wasn't ready for a gathering when their birthday arrived and only invited Chakotay to dinner in her quarters. She felt for a while that she'd broken Neelix's heart when she refused to allow him to throw them a party.

Recently things only got complicated when Owen was in unfamiliar surroundings or around an unfamiliar crew member. His tantrums were as severe as they'd always been and the only one that could calm him was Janeway herself. Chakotay watched for a minute as Owen got more and more brave watching Naomi interact with the characters. Finally, the little spitfire took tentative steps toward the action. He looked back to his mama to see if she'd disappeared. When it was proven she hadn't he continued on to the two others playing in the forest of forever.

"Afternoon, Captain. He's making it, I see." Chakotay indicated the three-year- old interacting, now, with the character himself.

"A little. We're hoping this program will help more. It's been designed to bring him back from the problems Q created. It will entice his curiosity and eventually he'll learn nothing will happen if he can't see me." Her smile was a little sad. "I wish it wasn't necessary. He used to be so happy, and now he's scared all the time."

"I thought it was better." He was puzzled by her admittance.

"It was, until the Equinox, as if I didn't have enough to feel guilty about with that. I scared Owen half to death with my obsession. Then there was B'elanna's accident. He was in sickbay when she went into arrest. He was worried about her. I think he just might have his first crush on her." The smile that graced her face, Chakotay had seen a million times, but it seemed somehow different when she was talking about Owen. "He's three now, it amazes me how fast the time has gone, before I know it he'll be four. It's already been almost two months since our shared birthday, I love watching him grow, but at the same time I want him to stay this way. I'm enjoying being his mother completely, even this frustration I feel over his anxiety pales in comparison to how much I adore him."

"That is plain to see, Kathryn, and I'd bet he's acting this way because he adores you just as much as you do him." Chakotay watched as Owen chased Naomi and Flotter in a game of tag. The boy's laughter was a sorely missed sound on Voyager, and Chakotay smiled softly at it. "Anyway I came to update you on B'elanna's progress experimenting with the new communications that Lieutenant Barclay sent through the micro-wormhole."

"How's it coming?" She finally pulled her thoughts from the boy in front of them though she still watched him play.

"She says it'll take a few months before it's ready but it looks like it might work. Another thing, Tom's working on a new Holodeck program and he's being intensely secret about it. B'elanna can't even pry any hints from him. It should be good."

"I look forward to it." She hadn't even taken her eyes off the children a few meters away.

"I guess that's all then." As he turned she called him back.

"Stay a while, Commander. Unless you have some place to be?" She raised an inquisitive eyebrow at him. "It occurred to me recently that I'm probably not the only member of the command staff that was worried sick about him. It also occurred to me that I haven't thanked you for watching out for me, and saving my dignity when I went to far, and giving both of us comfort when I was too stubborn to ask for it. Thank you, Chakotay." Her hand rested on his cheek for a moment.

"I admit we all were worried and scared. B'elanna may have a crush of her own, really, she enjoys spending time with Owen. She swears he'll be an engineer when he grows up. I don't want to predict anything, but I doubt he'll be very interested in engineering. He's your son after-all." He was attempting to keep the situation light, but she had to say it.

"I meant you, Chakotay, I wasn't the only one that stayed on duty for more than two full days. You love him too. As much as you've done for him, I'm not surprised. He adores you as well. He's ecstatic when you come for dinner. You're very good for him to have around. A positive role-model, and well chosen I'd say."

"Thank you, Captain." He smiled remembering the conversation they'd had about how he felt like Owen's father.

"It's true, and my name is Kathryn. I'm not on duty and I doubt that you are either." She smiled playfully. "I do have a small favor, well, maybe not so small, to ask you. I'm supposed to vacate the area here in a few minutes while Owen plays, but I need someone to stay and show him he's safe no matter where, on the ship or off it, I am."

"I suppose I could do that. I'll do anything to help."

"Are you sure? He's going to get quite loud. You may have noticed that Owen is very, uhm, vocal when he's upset." She flashed a wry smile at him.

Chakotay chuckled softly, "I've noticed. It would be my pleasure, Kathryn. I might just stay and finish another program with him. If I'm granted permission by his mother?"

"Fine with me. Dinner is at 1900 hours, bring him home and join us." She stood. "May as well get this over with."

"See you later, Kathryn." He watched her leave the room and settled in to wait for the inevitable fit. He didn't wait long once the game of tag ended and Owen's attention wavered from the temporary distraction he looked up to find Janeway missing. He began to search for her tears running down his face already. When he'd checked everywhere he looked at Chakotay as though he'd been betrayed and the wailing began.

"Owen, stop that, you're okay. The captain probably had an important meeting to attend." Naomi tried to console him, to no avail. Chakotay stepped over to them and knelt down on Owen's level.

"Owen stop crying for just a moment." He'd been struck by and inspiration. "Look at me," the teary blue eyes met his, "take a deep breath, little man, and calm down for me. I'll show you a way to find you're mama when you can't see her." Owen was still sniffling but Chakotay had his full attention. "Listen to what I say and try it yourself." He instructed and then commanded, "computer, locate Captain Janeway."

"Captain Janeway is in her ready room." The computer stated efficiently. Owen's eyes dried further.

"Computer, locate Captain Janeway." He said softly, there was no response. "You have to talk louder, Owen. Like this," Naomi said. "Computer, locate Ensign Wildman."

"Ensign Wildman is on the bridge, at the science station."

Owen raised his voice and tried again. "Computer, locate Captain Janeway."

"Captain Janeway is on the bridge." Owen smiled at Chakotay, "It worked, Mama's on the Bridge."

"Now if you ever get scared and can't find her Owen, you just ask the computer to tell you where she is." His pupil nodded and latched onto his leg. He lifted Owen and hugged him. "Why don't we go play with Flotter, he looks bored over there alone." Owen nodded eagerly and they went to play.

Chapter 21

_** Finally, I've been released by my wife to return to my study. It appears that Captain Janeway has taken to spending as much time on the Holodeck as possible. Her crew has created a quaint little Irish town, and with the equivalent of an interstellar Hurricane on approach to the ship, Janeway has `battened down the hatches' and approved an open door policy concerning this Fair Haven program. She has spent a lot of time in the program. This visit tonight makes the fifth in three days. She's spent all her time with one character there. They've spent time in the pub, on a walk in the hills, and I do believe she's taken a romantic interest in this holo-man. I wonder what old Chuckles thinks of this.**_

It was the middle of the night cycle on Voyager. Kathryn Janeway walked silently down the quiet corridors of her ship. The distant hum of the engines was all she could hear, the subtle vibrations through the deck enhancing that sound only slightly. She was once again on her way to see Michael Sullivan. She had been restless in her quarters, Owen's even breathing, normally soothing, had kept her awake, or the star streaks outside shined too brightly in her eyes. Any little, insignificant thing that could have kept her from sleep assaulted her senses. She even fancied that she'd heard the bathroom faucet drip, which she knew was preposterous.

So after making certain that Owen was soundly sleeping, not worried about him waking up and panicking; there'd been no trouble since his afternoon with Chakotay on the holodeck. With thoughts of sleep lost she had decided to go for a walk, she ended up on her way to talk to Michael. Tom and Harry had just finished rebuilding the fair haven program, but, she reflected, she didn't need the surroundings, just the man.

It had been almost six weeks since they'd punched their way through the storm and Fair Haven had been all but destroyed. She and the rest of the crew were glad to finally have it back online, so she wasn't entirely surprised to find that someone was already in the running program. She was, however, surprised to find out who it was in the program. Then she found herself feeling more than a little guilty, she should be going to him to talk until she fell asleep. She longed to show him how much she did feel the same about him as he did about her, but her sense of duty was firmly ingrained and she wouldn't go against it, not until they got home. So she tried to fill the emptiness with a harmless hologram, who could be deleted at any time, but she still felt wrong doing so.

She wanted to turn and go back, but she was here and she did want to talk to someone, hopefully, Chakotay wouldn't be in the pub. That hope was dashed when she entered the familiar dimly lit room. Chakotay was sitting on a corner stool at the bar, conversing with the very man she was looking for. They were deep in conversation it seemed, for neither had noticed her yet. "Evening, gentlemen," she said in her unique, almost sultry voice.

The hologram's face brightened as he looked up to answer. "Hello, Katie."

She hadn't seen Michael's face light up. She'd been watching her first officer. His whole demeanor had brightened when she'd spoken. "Good evening, Kathryn. Owen sleeping?" The half-smile, punctuated with a dimple, made her feel a little light-headed.

`Get a grip, Kathryn,' she thought before answering him. "Like a rock. I've got an open com to my cabin, so if anything happens I'll be notified, just in case he does wake up."

"I was just getting ready to head home, I could sit with him for a while if you like." He almost looked hopeful.

"Be my guest, Commander. I couldn't sleep, so I don't know exactly how long I'll be." She touched his arm gently conveying her gratitude in his most favorite of ways.

"Okay, I'll be going now. Michael, it was, uhm, enlightening. Good night, Kathryn." Janeway and the hologram bid him goodnight and then he was gone.

"That is one very uncommon fellow. Not that it's a bad thing mind ya." The man added quickly at her expression. "We just don't see many like him here. Very illuminated in his beliefs."

"Yes, he definitely is, I don't know what I'd have done with out his friendship over the years."

"Katie, if I may, who's Owen?" He inquired cautiously.

"My son, Michael." The look of shock on his face prompted her to add, "it's a

long story."

"I'd like to hear it. Why haven't you mentioned him before now, Katie?" This with a raised eyebrow.

"I didn't quite know how to explain him to you, and I didn't really think he was any of your concern. So I just didn't say anything." She stated candidly.

"Ah, but darlin', anything concerning you, I'd like to think it concerns me too."

"There's a lot you don't know about me, Michael. A lot you can't know. As far as Owen is concerned, I'll bring him around when it's a better time for him." Her tone and the raised eyebrow told him to drop it, and he'd learned early to listen to those warnings unless he felt like watching her storm out. The room felt awkward for a while, but they eventually overcame it and chatted easily. When she heard the muffled sounds of Chakotay entering her quarters and speaking softly she closed the comm channel.

Chakotay entered the captain's quarters to find a wide awake little Janeway sniffling softly as he ambled around the rooms. "What's wrong, Owen?" Chakotay stooped to gather the boy in his arms. "You're supposed to be sleeping."

"Woke up. I had to potty and get a drink. Mommy's not in there." He pointed back to the bedroom. "Was lookin' for her. She not anywhere. Where Mama?" His little voice was clipped with emotion and punctuated with some tears and a trembling lower lip.

"She couldn't sleep, little man, so she decided to go for a walk. She's on the holodeck now. She's trying to make herself sleepy, and sent me to look after you." Chakotay answered him softly being as comforting as he could. "I'll tell you what, if your mommy says it's okay, do you want to stay in my quarters tonight?"

A deep breath and a thoughtful expression later Owen agreed sleepily. Chakotay almost contacted Janeway to inform her before he remembered where she was. So he left a message flashing on her Comm letting her know where Owen was. Then he gathered some of Owen's clothes for the next morning and carried him to his quarters. By the time they arrived Owen was sleeping as peacefully as ever. Chakotay settled the boy into his bed, readied himself, and got into the bed with his small guest. By the time that Janeway returned from the holodeck Chakotay was long asleep, so she decided to just go to bed and worry about collecting Owen in the morning.

_**Well, Chuckles seems to be trying to accept the captain's new interest in photons and forcefields. He really needs some lessons in how to stand up for what you want. Maybe I've been concentrating on the wrong human.**_

Chapter 22

"Captain's Log Stardate -.- The citizens of Fair Haven seem to have taken the news that I and many others of their friends are from a starship that has been visiting in stride. The decision to close the open door policy seems to have cut down on the wear and tear to the Holodeck, and the crew have had few problems with the shut down. The interest of the new program had already begun to wear thin and only a handful of crewmen still go there. I was worried about the reactions of the townspeople to the news, especially Michael, and how they all could react.

It's been a pleasant surprise that they continue to accept us as friends. I will admit that Michael's knowledge of our origins makes it easier to discuss Owen and explain his presence. In fact I intend to introduce them this evening. The Borg children seem to be adjusting nominally well to their severance from the collective, it was a tragedy that the infant didn't survive after all that was tried to save her. On another front, the encounter with the living memorial has many of the crew shaken to the core. Naomi was frightened severely when Neelix held security at bay with a phaser keeping her in the kitchen against her will. It's taken a little time but the barrier between them seems to have fallen.

Owen is another matter. The Doctor assures me that he didn't experience the more frightening aspects as the adult crew did, but he did experience the fear in the colonists and I'm afraid that the hysteria I, and others he is close to, projected at times did little to help his recovery. He still distrusts new people. I could strangle Q for this. At any rate, things have run smoothly since the crisis on the holodeck, and I can only hope that tonight's meeting goes off without a hitch."

_** "This should be interesting." The words were dripping with sarcasm.**_

As the holodeck doors went silent Janeway, Owen's left hand held in her right, noticed that the twilight lit streets of Fair Haven were still. It was as if the air itself had decided that dusk was a time for rest. The roads, so busy in the daylight hours, were virtually empty except for a lone dog trotting off home. Owen looked around curiously at the buildings and wondered where they had come this time, as they made their way to the pub at a leisurely pace.

The music could be heard long before the undulating shadows of dancers could be seen through the windows. When the doors opened they were hit with a wave of sound, the band's vivacious tune mixed with the patron's merriment. Owen was startled by it and clung to the skirts of the traditional dress she'd changed into. In order to reassure him she lifted him off of his feet to settle on her hip. "It's okay, you'll get used to the noise, sweetheart." He nodded and she carried him into the bar.

Kathryn was greeted enthusiastically by the dancers closest to the door. She received some surprised looks, but it didn't appear that Owen caused too much of a stir. She nodded hello to Tom, B'elanna and Harry, who sat at one of the tables on the sidelines watching the dancing and Tom, of course, betting on the Arm Wrestling. "Ahh, Katie, darlin', are ya gonna dance for us tonight?" Seamus asked from his perch on a barstool. Michael looked up from his conversation with another of the holo-characters as she stepped closer and away from the press of bodies watching the dancing. Apparently they hadn't seen Owen because the look of shock that passed between them was raw and unmasked.

"I think not, Seamus, I have other responsibilities tonight." Janeway replied finally coming abreast of the bar. Owen's perusal of the bar finally included the officers at their table. He gasped his excitement, "Mama, look B'elanna and Tom and Harry. I can go play now?" The dumbfounded look grew on Seamus's face, but Michael smiled softly.

"Not yet, my Owen. I want you to meet my friend. She settled onto a stool and sat Owen on the bar facing her, while Michael served two customers that had called for service. He tentatively made his way over to them. "Michael Sullivan, I'd like you to meet Owen, my son. Owen, this is Michael, Mommy's very good friend." His little eyes watched the man filled with uneasiness.

"That's a fine name there, lad." Michael held a hand out to the boy. Owen leaned away from him to hide his face in Janeway's neck.

"You'll have to excuse him, Michael. He's very shy around new people." She kissed her son's head to soothe the fear in his little body. "Say hello, sweetheart." Owen shook his head vehemently. `This is going wonderfully,' she sighed mentally as she soothed his back. During a brief lull in the music she heard the door open and shut. Owen began to struggle in her grip.

"Put me down, Mommy." She set him down, finally, to avoid dropping him. As soon as his little shoes touched the floor he was off winding his way through the bodies. "Owen, where are you going?" Janeway called watching him. She looked around to see what might have garnered his reaction just in time to see him lifted off the floor by her First Officer.

"Chakotay!" The unabashed joy in his voice could be heard even over the music, and his little face was alight like a palm beacon.

"Your Owen seems to like that one a bit, Katie." Michael observed.

"Yes, he's gotten very close to Commander Chakotay. They've spent quite a bit of time together since Owen's arrival." Chakotay was making his way over to them now with Owen in his arms. The little boy was fervently describing his exploits of the day.

"Michael, Kathryn, good evening." He nodded to both of them. "Owen's been telling me about his day. Apparently, Neelix over cooked the snacks and Flotter got himself frozen when it snowed in the Forest of Forever this morning." Owen broke in here continuing the story. Kathryn felt a little guilty, she'd been so focused and worried about his meeting with Michael, she'd not asked about his day.

"He turned into ice, Mama. I couldn't fix him, but Naomi came and helped cause I can't play with fire. It took a long time to warm him up. She said we found a hot spring and put him in there a little at a time. Treebus carried him. But he, Treebus, he got termites and we made him take a bath in Flotter's water. Those bugs, they didn't like it at all. They all jumped off him and flew. He's okay now, not itching anymore." Owen was clearly excited about his discoveries and accomplishments. Over the last three weeks he'd become a little jabber box when he was excited.

"I'm so glad he is, Owen. How is everything, Commander? Something come up?" She wondered.

"No, I promised to meet B'elanna and Tom for some down time." He smiled to assure that the ship was running smoothly.

"In that case, I'll take that little rogue off your hands and leave you too it." She reached out for Owen, but the three-and-a-half-year-old protested.

"I wanna stay with Chakotay, Mama." He pushed her hands away.

"Owen, Chakotay is here to relax and have a bit of fun. I doubt he wants-"

"It's all right, Kathryn. I don't mind if he sits with me for a while." He could see that Kathryn wanted Owen to stay and get aquatinted with her new love interest. Chakotay felt bad about it, but he didn't want Owen to get to know the man. He liked being the father figure in Owen's life. "Besides since the other children were brought on board I haven't spent as much time with him. I'd like the chance to make up for it."

She sighed defeat. "If you don't mind then, by all means, have fun. You be good, little fox. I love you." The last was whispered in her son's ear as she leaned over to place another kiss on his face, it was judiciously returned and he answered, "Me too, Mama."

"I'll collect him as I leave, or send him back over when you're ready to go."

"I'll be around somewhere. Probably outside before long, I think I'll show Owen some Earth Constellations. You know where I like to go to stargaze?" She nodded. "We'll be there." He turned to make his way to the table where the others were chatting.

"Bye, Mama." Owen called back.

"I'm sorry, Michael, I wanted so much for you to meet each other. I should have brought him on a different night."

The man smiled tenderly, "don't worry about it, Katie. There'll be another time." For some reason, watching her son, across the room, sitting in the middle of the table where her friends and command staff fawned over him, the words didn't comfort her any. `I should be over there with them,' she thought sadly. It didn't even occur to her that she could have walked over and joined them.

Much later after many of the patrons had gone, and the music had died down, Kathryn left in search of Owen and Chakotay. It was more silent now than it had been at dusk. The stars flickered beautifully overhead. She took her time following the path to the top of a tall hill where she knew Chakotay liked to sit and take in the sounds of a holographic natural world.

There was a gentle breeze and the night was just the right temperature for a relaxing stroll. Climbing to the hill top was a bit harder than she remembered due to the costume she'd worn, but she made it without fuss.

She reached the pinnacle and the first thing she saw was a sky-full of twinkling stars and a low-hanging half moon unobstructed by the branches of trees bordering the trail. The second sight she beheld was her first officer stretched out on the soft, downy grass with her son sprawled atop his chest. Both had dozed off watching the stars. One of Chakotay's hands was spread over Owen's chest holding him in place protectively.

Kathryn Janeway felt something she'd buried deeply stirring within herself. Something that she hadn't felt in quite a while. Seeing her son peacefully asleep in the company of her first officer, her secret love, it was almost her undoing. She caught herself before she went any farther. She was glad that they were asleep because she knew her feelings would be written on her face. Her love for him had to remain aloof until they were safely in the Alpha Quadrant.

_** Oh, Kathy, you delude yourself, and you deny happiness.**_

"Chakotay," she kept her voice low so she didn't disturb Owen. When neither stirred she touched the hand holding Owen steady. "Chakotay, it's just me. Time to go home."

"What, Kathryn. I must have dozed off." His voice was groggy.

"Here, let me take Owen." His hand moved from under hers and Kathryn lifted Owen off of Chakotay. The little one protested being moved and awakened with a whine. "It's okay, my little fox, Mommy's got you."

"Sleepy, Mama." His voice was thickly laden with sleep. He leaned into her pulling his arms compactly between them and nestled closer to her.

"Then sleep, baby, we're going home." She rubbed his back softly with one hand.

"Okay, Mama." With that he was sound asleep once more. Chakotay was standing now, dusting the grass and dirt off his uniform.

"What did you two do, Commander. He was so rambunctious when we got home earlier I didn't think I'd get him to sleep tonight."

"Not much, as soon as we got to the table, B'ela had him out on the dance floor. When she got back with him we decided to come out here. B'ela, Tom and I stargazed for a time while Harry chased Owen around and helped him collect fireflies. He had a grand time. So did the rest of us."

"And I missed it." She sounded despondent.

"Come back with me sometime. Thank you, by the way, for allowing me to spend time with him." They'd left the Holodeck and were enroute to her quarters.

"You're very welcome, Chakotay. I'm just glad he likes one of the men in my life." A soft blush colored her cheeks as she thought how that must've sounded. "He didn't give poor Michael a chance."

"I'm sorry about that. If I hadn't shown up, he wouldn't have abandoned you."

"No that's all right, Chakotay, he'd already asked to go to Tom and B'elanna's table. It was just a matter of time before he disappeared. I really don't think he liked Michael anyway. Owen wouldn't even look at him."

"But you wanted them to have a chance to get to know each other."

"They did, sort of, I introduced them. The more I think on it, no, I don't think my sly little fox liked Michael at all."

"Had he agreed to meet Michael earlier when you told him where you were going?"

"No, I didn't even think to ask, I was excited for them to meet." They were nearing her quarters now.

"Next time try to remember to ask him, Kathryn. He's a very perceptive child, and I've noticed he likes to be included in decisions regarding himself." They drew abreast of her door.

"You're right, next time it's his decision." She hesitated for a moment and finally threw caution to the winds. "Would you like to come in for a cup of tea and relax for a bit?" She opened the door and entered without waiting for him.

"No, thank you, but where would you like his bag?" She hadn't even noticed Chakotay holding the bag.

"Just toss it on the table. I need to get it ready for tomorrow. Where did you get it anyway?" She asked as she carried Owen into the bedroom.

"Neelix stopped by and found us outside the pub. You'd forgotten it in the mess hall. I figured since I had Owen with me I may as well keep the bag too."

"Mama, I'm thirsty." Owen's muddled voice drifted out of the bedroom.

"Okay, little fox, we'll get you a drink, and then into some pajamas." She said gently to the half-asleep child. He heard the tap run for a second and then the muffled sounds of Janeway returning to the bedroom.

"Here you go, Owen. Don't spill it. Mama's going to change out of this ridiculous costume real fast, stay here in my bed."

"I will, Mommy." Again Chakotay heard the muffled sounds of her walking to the bathroom and the door closing. There was silence for a bit and then the door opening.

"Okay, let's get you into some pajamas too." He doubted that Owen was still awake enough to care. "Where are those...Chakotay, on second thought could you bring me his bag?" She called softly.

He chuckled lightly retrieved the bag and took it to her. "Here, Kathryn." He held out the bag trying not to notice how her silken, royal blue, dressing robe clung in some strategic places with her movement. To distract himself he looked around her room. It hadn't changed much, he noticed, since Owen's arrival. Everything was where it had been before. The only difference was a small bed off to one side in a spot that once was open space, and the dresser near it and a box of toys in the outer room.

"Thank you, Chakotay." She pulled out a set of pajamas and tossed them on the bed beside Owen. Deposited his bag on her dresser and crossed back to the dreaming child on her bed. "Okay, little fox, it's time to get your clothes changed."

The small blue gaze was unfocused as Owen opened his eyes momentarily. "Okay, I can help, Mama." It was clear that the child wouldn't be moving under his own power in the immediate future as the eyes slipped shut once more.

"Anything I can do to help, Kathryn?" Chakotay lingered in the doorway.

"Sure get his shoes and pants, if you would. I can get the rest while you do that." The smile she flashed lit the room.

"I get the easy part then." It was silent while they worked to get Owen changed. After Kathryn got the boy settled into his bed, and they retired to the outer room, Chakotay asked. "Would you tell me why you've started to call him `little fox'?" She answered as they settled on the couch.

"No big secret there. A few weeks ago I went to the holodeck to pick him up after my shift. He and Naomi had been in there for a while playing a Flotter adventure about the mud monster, one of my childhood favorites actually, anyway, they were covered in it. Mud, that is. As soon as I saw him all I could think of was getting him into a bath. I said as much and he looked up at me with the most innocent expression, those big blue eyes of his twinkling, and said casual-as-can-be, `but Mama, it's just simulated dirt, can't I just pretend to take a bath?' I was completely speechless." A smile graced her face and he could see her slip back there and remember her son's comment and the way he'd stood commandingly with an adorable expression on his smudged face. He'd been very much her son at that moment.

"Anyway, I explained that dirt was dirt, simulated or not, and he was taking a real bath. Naomi said that he'd given Tom an equally brilliant answer earlier in the mess hall, and Tom had commented that he was getting as sly as a fox. It just kinda stuck and it fits so I use it like a nickname."

"I never figured you for a nickname kinda girl, Kathryn." Chakotay meant it as joke but Janeway took him seriously.

"Well, I had a similar nickname as a child, it's one of the better memories I have of my father. He used to call me `little bird', don't ask me why, but it was something special between the two of us. I want Owen to feel that secure too."

"So, fox is your special name for him." Chakotay looked startled.

"Yes, I guess it's a little silly."

"Not at all, Kathryn, there is a similar practice among some of the families among my people. The parent of a child sometimes took to calling their child the name of an animal or plant that the child reminded them of. My mother came from such a family. She called me her gentle bear. She explained that a bear seems fierce and angry to those who do not know it, but with those who do know it, those it loves, a bear is infinitely gentle for all the power it has. She thought I was like the bear." He explained in a voice that was revisiting a good memory.

"It fits you well, Chakotay. I've never met anyone as gentle with the people he loves." The silence settled heavily between them after her comment. Chakotay knew that they were treading dangerous waters, so he chose a strategic retreat before Kathryn caught herself and inadvertently caused them both pain.

"Look I've got the early shift tomorrow, so I better head home for some sleep." He stood, brushed a delicate kiss on her cheek and left her sitting there looking after him with her fingers covering the spot where his lips had rested briefly.

Chapter 23

_** That Chakotay, I was wrong about him, he doesn't need any help catching the things he wants at all. Kathy remembered to ask Owen when she decided to try again. Owen, surprisingly, gave the hologram the cold shoulder the whole time, and after that flat out refused to go. She hasn't spent much time with the hologram since then preferring her son's company. I admit I don't really know most of what took place that evening when the changes started to occur. I just observed the conversation on the couch. Something big must have happened though. Chuck has been joining Owen and Kathy for more and more `working' dinners. On the down side, Q2, my son, has been nothing but trouble. I'm afraid the continuum is very displeased. I'm going to ask, no, beg Kathy to help me with Q2. She's doing an admirable job with her clone. Here goes nothing.**_

Captain's personal log Stardate -.-

"The events of the past few months have hopefully begun to settle down. First the away mission I took with the so-called misfits aboard Voyager. In retrospect I am glad that I didn't take Owen. He'd asked to come and it being just an exercise to integrate the ensigns and crewman I didn't expect problems, and almost relented. At the last moment I decided it better he stay behind I didn't want them to have the impression that it was a joke to take them out there. Owen's presence would have made light of the exercise and I couldn't allow it. So I left him with Commander Chakotay. They were both there when I woke up in sickbay. Then there was the return of our beloved friend Kes, and her irrational anger toward us. It was quickly dispelled thanks to a recording she made for herself in the past. She and Neelix spent a little time together, and she was amazed at how fast Naomi has grown since the last time she saw her. Her reaction to Owen was as expected, and Owen adored her as well. She has a way with children that amazes me.

The encounter with Unimatrix zero was unsettling. On the bright side of that, it appears that Owen has finally bounced back from the residual side-effects brought about by Q's actions. According to Tom and Neelix he was worried about me while I was unavailable to him during that whole fiasco and scared of the Borg, but he told them that he knew I'd be back before long.

"Speaking of Tom Paris, he and B'elanna have gotten married. Officially I approve and personally I'd say it's about damn time. The doctor's disappearance was frightening. Owen had a very high grade fever at the time the doctor went missing, I'm glad that Samantha has experience with childhood illnesses. She talked me through the worst of it, and by the time we got the doctor back Owen was back one-hundred percent." Kathryn drifted off track for a moment thinking about how sick Owen had been.

Voyager had been quiet for the last few days. The visit of an Alien being by the name of Gar was the only excitement they'd noted. It was very early morning the night that Harry and Tom had discovered that the doctor was missing. Kathryn was in her quarters sitting in her favorite chair reviewing the reports. She thought nothing of Owen's occasional cough or sneeze. He did have allergies the same as she, at this time of year. She had finally decided to turn in around 0230 and checked on Owen to make sure he was comfortable as had been her habit since he'd entered her life.

She discovered Owen sweating profusely and his teeth chattering. She immediately felt his head for fever and was surprised how scalding he was to the touch. She tapped her communicator. "Janeway to Chakotay."

A drowsy voice answered. "Yes Captain what is it?" He had clearly been sleeping for quite some time.

"Chakotay, I need help. Something is wrong with Owen. If his fever gets any higher I'll be able to fry eggs on his head." Her statement would have been playful if it hadn't been for the fear in her voice.

"I'll be right there. You might call Sam, she's been through this with Naomi quite a few times." She could hear the sheets of his bed snap as he threw them off and rose from his bed.

"All right, see you in a bit." The link between them ended and Janeway called Samantha Wildman.

"Yes Captain, can I help you." Her response was groggy, and Kathryn felt bad for disturbing her rest.

"Sam, I'm sorry to wake you, but Owen has a very high fever, and Chakotay suggested you might know what to do better than he. I don't know how to get his temperature down without the doctor."

"It's okay, Captain. Get his wet clothing off of him and run him a warm bath. Get him into it and then call the crewman that is on duty in sickbay. They can get a hypospray to help with the fever. Hopefully Tom will be on duty he's gifted. He's taken care of Naomi quite a few times."

Chakotay had entered her quarters now and heard the conversation; he began undressing the struggling child on the bed.

"Sam, thank you." Kathryn crossed the room and turned the water on in the tub. She was suddenly very grateful for her captain's prerogative.

"My pleasure Captain. If you need anything else call me back."

"I will, Janeway out." The tub was filling with warm water as Chakotay entered with a shivering Owen cradled delicately in his arms. "It's still filling." She sounded small and frightened.

"He's going to be okay, Kathryn. We'll take care of him." He held Owen closer to his chest to share his body heat with the boy. "It looks good, Kathryn we don't want it too full, unless one of us is getting in with him."

"I am, I want to hold him, I want him to know I'm here with him. I'll need you to get the on duty crewman from Sickbay to make a house call." Kathryn had stripped to her tank top and skivvies. She lowered herself into the lukewarm water and accepted Owen from Chakotay. She held him in the water, careful to keep his face clear of it. "Who's on in Sickbay anyway?"

"Tom, this shift. He requested it. I think that B'elanna has been hard to live with recently, Klingon hormones. I'll have him bring a medical tri-corder and a hypospray."

"Thank you Chakotay." Kathryn said dribbling water over Owen's brow, while she held him gently.

"I'll be right back." He stepped out to call Tom, leaving her with her Owen. He also needed a little time to compose himself. That had been more Janeway skin than he'd seen since New Earth. Tom arrived shortly and Chakotay apprised him of the situation in more detail. Tom entered the captain's bathroom as prepared as he could be. She was in the bathtub with Owen on her stomach, thankfully, hiding her state of undress. His face had a determined expression as he set about taking readings over Owen. A few minutes passed and he programmed the hypospray then applied it to the boy's neck.

"He should get better now, Captain. He's got a cold and don't be surprised if he's congested for the next couple days. Have him drink hot chocolate. That's how my mom always made me feel better when I had colds as a kid. Get used to them too. He'll catch this quite a few more times during childhood." Tom reached in and felt the water temperature. "I'd get him out of this water too. It's done it's job for now and cooled him down, but you don't want him to chill."

"Right. Chakotay, grab that towel please." Kathryn indicated a large fluffy white towel hanging on the sonic shower door. He handed it to her and the men left the room. Kathryn raised herself and Owen out of the water and then stepped out of the tub. She wrapped him securely in the towel and pulled on her bathrobe. They were conversing on the other side of the door in her bedroom and she stepped out to join them. Chakotay stepped forward with a blanket for Owen. He wrapped the boy in it while Kathryn pulled out another set of pajamas for him. They got him dressed again and the two men retired to the main room, Chakotay carrying Owen, so that Kathryn could change out of the wet clothes in peace. When she entered her living room Tom was gone and Chakotay sat rocking Owen softly. Janeway walked over and put a hand on her first officer's shoulder. "Thank you for all your help, Chakotay. I very much appreciate it. I panicked when I felt how hot he was. I should have been able to figure this out myself."

"My pleasure, Kathryn, I was the same way, that's why I told you to call Samantha. He's settled down a lot since the bath and the hypo, he should sleep comfortably now."

"I hope so. I'll take him off your hands so that you can get some sleep." He looked reluctant, but transferred Owen to Kathryn's waiting arms.

"Kathryn, would you..." He trailed off hesitant to ask lest she get the wrong impression.

"What, Commander?"

"Nothing."

"Chakotay, what is wrong?" She was concerned for him now.

"I was going to ask if you'd mind me staying for a while, but you're tired too, I'll go. I'll be just next door though, Kathryn. If you have anymore problems or just need some relief call me." He was sincere and the offer sounded more like a request.

"I will, good night, Chakotay." She shifted Owen to a single armed grip and placed her free hand on his chest. "Sleep well."

"You too, Kathryn. Good night." The door had closed behind him and Kathryn returned to her bedroom. She settled herself and Owen in her bed, pulled the covers up over them, and dozed lightly the rest of the night until Owen's fever broke and didn't return.

Captain Janeway shook herself out of the memory and continued with her log. "Chakotay says that my more recent disappearance had a greater effect on Owen. He has had trouble sleeping, but nothing as severe as when Q took him. I think that the fact he was still aboard Voyager and surrounded by people who love and care for him is the reason that it wasn't worse. Apparently, Owen was terrified I wouldn't return. Chakotay left Owen with the Doctor, the psychology he used was perfect. He told Owen that while he was off ship Owen was acting first officer and that he was to help the doctor protect the ship. That put Owen's mind at ease. Owen and I have talked about his fear and it has helped his sleep to ease. I know I shouldn't say this, but what else could happen that could be any worse than that which we've already survived."

Captain Janeway stood to return to the bridge. As she did she heard a knock on the door leading from her ready room to the corridor. "Come in." She called returning to her chair. Her reaction to the person that walked into the room was immediate and instinctual. "Computer locate Owen Janeway."

"Owen Janeway is on Holodeck 2 with Commander Chakotay."

"Janeway to Chakotay."

"Yes, Captain." His voice was distracted and she could hear Owen's laughter over the comm.

"Keep a close eye on Owen, Commander, we have an uninvited guest on board. I'm sending security to you." She informed him. The entire senior staff had discussed what to do if Q ever returned.

"Aye, Captain. I've got Owen here. So far we're fine. Check back in five."

She sent a security team to the Holodeck and turned to face the being gracing her ready room with his presence. "What are you doing here?"

Q had decided to be as formal and reassuring as possible. As he'd observed Owen since the abduction; he'd come to feel guilty for his actions and wanted to make amends for the problems he'd caused. "Captain, I have a request to make. Really, a favor to ask of you and your crew. I apologize respectfully, for my previous actions, I beg your and Owen's forgiveness and I did knock this time."

She was intrigued by his actions, but that didn't mean she was going to let her guard down. "What is this favor?"

"I'm sure you remember, Q2. My son, he's grown considerably since you last saw him. He's become a, well, a discipline problem. Much as I love him I don't know what to do with him. I am requesting that you take him under your wing. Be his guardian for a time and teach him discipline and diplomacy. He has caused quite a few problems in the continuum. I'm afraid that this is his last chance."

"If I refuse?" Her voice was cold, unbending steel.

"I'm not here to threaten Captain. If you refuse then I ask that you take the boy in. The continuum is going to take his powers and leave him a mortal. I admit he's more like me than I'd like him to be. He's impertinent and disrespectful."

"A chip off the old block." Janeway's voice was filled with venom.

"I deserve that. What can I do to get you to concede and help me." He looked sincere enough. Still she didn't trust him. Wouldn't trust him after what he'd done.

"For the moment, I need to think about this. Come back tomorrow at this time, and don't forget to knock." There was such hardness to her command, that if he'd been a mortal he'd have been afraid.

"I'll see you tomorrow then." He faded from view.

"Transporter room, site to site to the corridor outside Holodeck 2." The beam engulfed her and she found herself face to face with Tuvok who stood guard outside the holodeck doors.

"Captain, is there a problem?"

"The situation is clear for the moment Tuvok. Q is going to return tomorrow at the same time. He was here to make a request. It was very surreal, old friend." The last sentence was a signal to Tuvok that they were clear. "I'd like to go in and see Owen now."

"Of course, Captain." The Vulcan stepped aside and she entered the room.

"At ease gentlemen. The crisis is past for the moment." The guards relaxed their stances and exited the holodeck leaving Chakotay and Owen alone with Kathryn. She looked around at her surroundings as she made her way to them. The area was lush and green Chakotay stood beside a lake with Owen held tightly in his arms. Owen didn't look happy at all. His hair was dripping wet as was Chakotay's, apparently they'd gone for a swim. That would account for the defiant look on her son's face at the moment. He wanted to go back into the water. She neared and extracted her son from Chakotay's protective grip. She didn't even care that she was still on duty and Owen's drips were soaking her uniform.

"Sorry to interrupt the camping trip. Are you okay, little fox?" Owen nodded.

"I wanna go back in the water Mama, and Chakotay won't let me," he pouted.

"There was an alert, sweetheart, he was under orders to keep a hold on you. You can go back in a little while, but I haven't seen you in two days don't I get a hug?" He threw his little arms around her and hugged with all his might.

"Can I go back now?" He looked hopeful.

"Are the safeties on?" A vigorous nod. "Okay, get going then." He ran off at top speed. "I should have known that hug was a bribe."

"How is our situation, Kathryn?" Chakotay looked worried still.

"Safe for the moment. Q wants a favor. His son is causing problems in the continuum and he wants us to teach the boy respect." She raised an amused eyebrow.

"And if we don't?"

"I asked the same. He said that he wasn't here to make threats and that he'd ask we take the boy in. He will be doomed to be a mortal if he doesn't reform. I'm sorry for interrupting you both." She carefully kept her eyes on the little boy playing in the water. Chakotay was sans shirt in his swimming attire, he was almost irresistible, unless she looked at the hard planes of his chest, then he was completely irresistible. She shook her head to clear it. They were in the middle of a crisis. "How are you progressing?"

"He's taken the basic principals to heart. We're working on survival skills now. Today he's learning to swim." Chakotay's voice had taken on a tone of pride.

"How's that coming then?"

"He's like a fish in water. Just watch him." They did for an endless moment. His swim trunks were a little big but that didn't deter the boy. He dove under and resurfaced and splashed and righted his trunks then went back to his play. He was having a grand time in the water. "What are we going to do about Q?"

"He's asked what he can do to prove that he means us no harm. I have an idea, but there's no guarantee it will work. I'm going to make him swear that he will never interfere with Owen's life again. He can appear to me or you or anyone else for that matter, but never again can he contact Owen. He can observe all he wants but he'd better not come near my son again." Her voice was as deadly as he'd ever heard it.

"It might work if you say it like that, but that's a long term thing, what about an immediate demonstration."

"I think that he's already gotten a good start with that. He was here and he even knocked on the ready room door before entering, he even asked for Owen's and my forgiveness for the damage he did taking Owen like he did. I'm testing him for the moment."

"Then why come here now?"

"Chakotay, please, I wouldn't rest until I made sure he was safe, you know that. I'd like to ask you though, if it would be okay to postpone the rest of this trip until another time. I'd like to have him home tonight." He studied her as she watched her son. Despite her outward calm and almost flippant appearance and attitude her body was tense and he could see that her jaw was clenched in fear. He knew that it was just for her peace of mind that she wanted Owen back in her quarters tonight instead of the next day, and truth to tell the extra time wasn't really needed here. He'd taught Owen all the survival training a four-year-old could understand. It was all precautionary and he'd finished yesterday. They'd been here for three days already, and the final day was just for Owen to have fun.

"I think it would be okay, he's learned everything I wanted to teach anyway. I decided to hold off on helping him contact a spirit guide. I don't think he's quite ready yet. He needs a little more mental discipline. He can't enter the spirit world if he can't clear his mind and stay focused. He's too curious to concentrate on one thing for long. We've been playing all day."

"So you sprung for a vacation and got busted." She was teasing and he knew it.

"Not for me really, for him. Although, I doubt I would have wasted it. We've been enjoying ourselves, and you know how much I love to spend time with him." He was an honest man after-all. "I'll have him home for dinner. How's that."

"Sounds fine, and bring yourself too." She smiled evilly, "just make sure you are presentable Commander. This attire is inappropriate for dinner in the Captain's quarters."

"Yes, ma'am." He snapped to attention and saluted smartly wearing a dimpled grin the whole time.

His captain turned away and took a few steps toward the water. "Owen, Mommy's leaving." She called, the boy surprised both Commanding officers when he emerged from the water at a trot. He came up to his mother and hugged her once more.

"Bye, Mama. I'll be home soon." His smile was a perfect replica of her own.

"I know you will, little fox. I asked Chakotay to bring you home early. There's a danger and I want you at home, okay?" Janeway spoke as she knelt down to gather him closer, dripping and all. He nodded ascent and wrapped his arms around her neck.

"Okay with me, love you Mama. See you later." Owen planted a kiss on her cheek and was off again in all his half-naked glory toward the water.

"Commander, I'll see you both later." She turned and exited the holodeck to finish her shift.

Q reappeared as he'd promised and knocked as he'd promised, "Well?"

"I want your word on this. It's a long term promise and I want it observed. If I help your son, you leave mine alone. Period, for the rest of Owen's life you have no contact with him that can harm him in any way. No carting him off to a different dimension, no more kidnapping. I doubt I could stop it, but I want you to promise you won't take him from me again. I don't care if you observe, go ahead, but don't take him unexpectedly."

"I can do that Kathryn. I have finished my research in that area anyway. I like the boy, he's so much like you, but he's yours. I learned that the last time I saw him. Through and through that child is you. He's the reason I'm asking for your help with Q2. Owen was a perfectly behaved child, for one that has been separated from everything he knows. I truly didn't want to cause harm and I did. Sometimes my brilliant plans aren't so brilliant, but your guidance has shaped him into a very well-behaved child."

"Thank you. I try. When will Q2 arrive here, I'd like a little warning."

"As soon as you are ready for him I'll call him here." The Omnipotent being waited patiently while Captain Janeway had quarters prepared for Q2 and informed her crew of his imminent arrival. A week later both Q were gone and the routine settled back to normal parameters.

Chapter 24

_** I'm quite pleased with Q2. He learned well from Janeway. I'll honor the bargain I made with her. I'll only interfere with Owen's life to help, not hinder. Observation is still the key anyway.** _

"Owen, come here please. It's time for dinner, sweetheart." Janeway had retired to her quarters for the evening after Chakotay and Seven returned and the civilization of the Ventu was saved from desecration. Tom had unfortunately failed the test he'd been taking, but it was a small price to pay to save a civilization.

"Okay, Mommy, sorry, I was practicing. I want to get really good at this game and kick Tom in the pants. He always wins and he gloats. I'm gonna beat him next time for sure." Owen came to the table after washing his hands. He seated himself beside her and Janeway served him the meal.

"I'm glad you're enjoying that early birthday present, but right now, I want to just spend some time with you. How was your day, Little Fox?" She kissed the top of his head.

"Good, Neelix let me go with Naomi to Astrometrics to see Icheb. It was fun, and I got to see some of the charts of star systems that we were in last week." He was, thankfully, oblivious to the fact that Chakotay had been missing for over twenty-four hours. He was as happy as a clam, while she'd been worried and restless to find her friends, he'd been suitably distracted. So she was understandably tired and knowing that he'd had a good day helped to drag her mind from work. "How was your day, Mommy? You look tired. Maybe you should go to bed early tonight. I will too."

"That's very thoughtful of you, sweetheart, but there are reports to go over, and we're going to check up on Chakotay after dinner. He and Seven had some trouble on their away mission."

"What happened, Mama?" He was innocently interested now.

"The shuttle crashed, they're okay, but Chakotay broke his leg. He's in Sickbay right now." She sighed in relief. The worry had been unbearable.

"But he's okay. That's what is important, right, Mama?" Her nod eased his little mind.

"That's right. How's the stew?"

"Just right, not to hot and not too runny." He said around a mouthful.

"Good, but don't talk with your mouth full." He nodded acknowledgment as he'd just taken another bite. She shook her head relaxing even further as their meal continued along with the conversation. True to her word, when they were finished they went to check on the second half of Voyager's Command Team.

Sickbay was as quiet as always, the doctor was in his office and stood when they entered. Janeway waved him away as Owen pulled her along to Chakotay's bedside. "Welcome home, Chakotay." Owen greeted him enthusiastically. He stood next to the bio-bed his face just clearing the top of it, and he was standing on his tip-toes. "Mommy said that you got a broken leg, so you have to stay in Sickbay. Does it hurt to have a broken leg?" The curiosity was genuine. Chakotay reached over and lifted Owen onto the bed beside him. Owen took the opportunity to give Chakotay a big hug.

"Thanks for the welcome. It hurt before we got back with no painkillers. My leg is okay now, but the Doctor insists that I stay here for observation. Seven gets to go regenerate in her alcove, but I have to stay here." The first officer was a little pouty.

"It's just one night, Commander." Janeway admonished him. "You're lucky it wasn't permanent. That's the last shuttle you ever fly from my ship, mister."

"That's two I've wrecked isn't it?" Her nod confirmed it. "Take it out of my pay check when we get home. By then I may have enough to pay for a shuttle."

"I'll think about that, for now just take it easy, Commander. We just wanted to see how you were doing. I think if you can make bad jokes you're doing just fine. What do you think Owen?"

"He looks okay to me." The little boy was getting antsy sitting around. He, like Kathryn, couldn't sit still for long.

"I suppose I should get Owen back and ready for bed. See you in the morning Commander." Seeing and hearing Chakotay had relaxed her even further and now she was ready to sleep for a week.

"In the morning then, Owen, you'd better come to see me too." He ruffled Owen's hair.

"I will. I'll be just down the corridor in the mess hall. Neelix won't mind." He replied straightening Chakotay's efforts.

"Go home, Kathryn, ignore the reports and sleep. You look dead on your feet. If you need to send Owen back here he can keep me company tonight. I'm not going anywhere." Chakotay was scrutinizing her appearance now. "Everything's back to normal and you need rest for whatever the Delta Quadrant throws at us next." Chakotay caught her nod as she lifted Owen to her hip and they departed Sickbay. Janeway took his advice and went to bed, Owen kept his end of the suggestion he'd made earlier and went to bed early too, she'd made a concession to his deal and pulled him into the bed with her snuggling with her little boy while they both fell asleep. The next crisis didn't occur for a few weeks, and she was rested, but none of the crew was ready for the events that took place. Least of all Voyager's first children.

The Mess Hall was swinging with the mid-twentieth century tunes coming from the equally ancient Jukebox in the corner. It was the celebration of First Contact. Neelix was buzzing from group to group as jovial as always when he had a party going. The doctor was complaining good-naturedly about the lack of nutrition in the food, and Naomi was chatting with Owen and Captain Janeway. Neelix crossed and offered a tray of goodies. The captain appropriated two and offered one to Owen. Owen thanked her just as Neelix handed her the entire tray and called for attention. He gave a speech, and Tuvok recited the first words spoken by the Vulcans to Zephraim Cochrane. Then Neelix began to dance. Owen was laughing hysterically at his friend and caretaker watching him. Chakotay entered and called Neelix over to speak with them.

"We've picked up a signal. It's Talaxian." The Command Team and two sets of small eyes looked to Neelix for his reaction.

"Talaxian. Where? Near here?" Neelix's interest was genuinely shocked, but very curious.

"Yes, come to the bridge, I'll show you." Chakotay turned and led Neelix out.

Janeway turned back to the children, "Owen stay here and have fun. Tuvok is still here, mind him." Owen nodded watching her leave the room behind her first and morale officers then went to find Tuvok. A few hours later Voyager was stationary outside the asteroid field that Tom, Tuvok and Neelix had reappeared from. Neelix brought with him a female Talaxian, Dexa, and her son, Brax. He was giving them a tour of the ship. They'd seen the bridge and Astrometrics, and were now on their way to engineering. Before they got there, though they bumped into Naomi and Owen. Owen glued himself to the Jovial man's leg.

"You're back, Neelix. I'm glad you're okay, we were worried."

"Oh, we were safe Owen, Tom was piloting. I'm glad to be home though." He turned to his elder charge. "Oh, and Naomi, I'm sorry I forgot about our game of Kadis-kaht."

"That's okay I know you're busy. Owen and I played against Icheb."

"We won." Was Owen's enthusiastic inclusion.

"That's quite an accomplishment. Icheb is very bright." He smiled gleefully at them.

"Anyway I wanted to meet your friends." Neelix introduced them. "I also thought that Brax might like to join us on the Holodeck."

"Yeah, Tom made a new program. It's called Invaders from the ninth dimension." Owen used a creepy voice to emphasize the program. "It's not even a Captain Proton."

"Sounds scary." Neelix said.

"Very." Naomi added with rolled eyes and the tolerance of an older sibling at Owen's dramatics.

Brax looked confused. "What's a holodeck?"

"Neelix is right, it might be too scary for you." Owen giggled at the older child's challenge.

"I'm not afraid." The young Talaxian looked up to his mother. "Can I?" At Neelix's nod she consented and the two older children ran off. Owen turned to follow, but Neelix scooped him off the floor.

"How have you been, keeping up your lessons young man." Owen nodded. "Good. Dexa, I'd like you to meet Owen Janeway. Owen this is Dexa."

"Hello there." Dexa said in a soft voice.

"Hi, can I go now Neelix. Naomi is gonna start without me. Mama gave me special permission to go with Naomi. I don't wanna miss anything."

"All right. Have fun, Owen." Neelix smiled at the little boy running to catch up with the others.

"I will. Hey! Wait for me, Naomi. I'm coming too." Owen called trailing them to the holodeck.

A day later the atmosphere was not quite as light. The miners had refused to compromise, and the Talaxians were packing to leave their home. Meanwhile, Neelix was devising a plan of action to save them. Janeway knew that her Morale officer felt obligated to help and she wasn't going to stop him. He'd returned to the colony on his own ship a few hours earlier. The sensors had just begun to pick up weapon's fire. "Chakotay, you've got the bridge. Tom, Tuvok, you're with me."

"Captain where are you going?" Chakotay asked with an edge to his voice.

"To render some assistance to a good friend, Commander." She spun on her heel and exited the bridge.

"Captain, where exactly are we going?" Tom asked.

"Neelix is going to need a hand, we're taking the Delta Flier and lending one." Janeway led them into the shuttle bay and they boarded and launched the Flier. Tom sailed the little ship smoothly into the asteroid field.

"Looks like we were just in time Captain. Neelix's ship just lost weapons."

"Intercept that charge before he can, Tom. It'll destroy him." Her order was worry filled.

"Yes Ma'am." The ship lurched forward, and if it hadn't been for the inertial dampers Captain Janeway would have found herself on the deck. "Almost in range, Tuvok any time you're ready." The phasers opened up and the charge exploded just as Neelix's ship flew into it. Janeway announced their presence.

"Captain, what about the prime directive?" Neelix sounded more worried about the directive than his own well-being.

"We're just helping out a friend, we didn't violate anything. Take your time Neelix we'll be waiting for you. Tom take us home." She hoped that reassured him and gave him time to get his obvious dilemma solved.

"Aye, Captain."

Many hours later, after he'd returned, Neelix found himself standing outside the Wildman quarters, Naomi had just driven home the fact that times had changed aboard the ship. She no longer required his doting godfather routine, and Owen never really had, though he loved the boy dearly. He found himself thinking more and more about Dexa and Brax. They did need him. He decided to have a cup of tea and think about it for a while, so he made his way to the mess hall. It was here in the darkened room in the middle of the night that he found Captain Kathryn Janeway staring out the viewport at the stars.

"I didn't think anyone else stayed up this late." She'd turned at the noise he made pouring himself a cup of coffee. Her voice held a hint of humor.

"Well I wouldn't want you to have coffee by yourself. Ah, where's Owen?" He knew she tried never to leave the child alone.

"He's staying with B'elanna and Tom this evening. B'elanna had to cancel his sleep over two weeks ago and wanted to make it up to him."

"I see, she was stuck in engineering as I recall." Janeway nodded while taking another sip of her drink.

"Have a seat." She waved him to a chair, but he chose the foot stool in front of her.

"I've been thinking about something. It's a little hard to put into words, and I haven't really made a decision yet. And of course I'd never ignore my responsibilities on Voyager." His speech was stilted and nervous.

"Of course not." She waited for him to continue.

"I take them very seriously." He added.

"I know you do." She suspected she knew where this conversation was headed and she knew he felt torn between the two places he felt he was needed. He took a sip of his coffee unsure whether to continue or just let the issue drop.

When silence reigned she decided to take pity on her friend and make his decision easier. She wouldn't begrudge any of her crew the happiness they sought. "I've been thinking about something myself. Maybe you could help me."

He straightened in his seat, always eager to help. "I'd be happy to."

Janeway took a moment to strengthen her resolve. What she was planning would be hard on the crew. Especially the children, who'd grown up with Neelix's caring spirit to guide them. "It's an idea I'd have to talk to Starfleet Command about."

"It must be important."

"It is." She stated in a solemn tone. "Now that we've established two-way communication with Earth, it seems to me that Starfleet could use a permanent ambassador in the Delta Quadrant. This ambassador would have to stay in frequent contact with Voyager."

"Certainly." The wheels in his head had begun to turn.

"It would be difficult for me to run this ship without you, Neelix, but that may be a sacrifice I'd be willing to make, for the greater good of Starfleet. Of course the assignment would be entirely voluntary. You wouldn't be interested would you?" She offered the position that Admiral Paris had mentioned in the last communiqué. They'd wanted her to find someone elsewhere that was suited to the job, but by offering this to Neelix she wouldn't worry that she'd made a bad judge of character concerning the representative, and she'd free Neelix from his sense of duty to Voyager's crew.

"Me? I'll need a little time to think about it." There was a grin on his face. She smiled then knowing his answer already, but realizing that he needed to make the decision itself on his own.

"Take all the time you need. I think I'll try to get some sleep before Owen gets home tomorrow. Goodnight, Neelix." He didn't acknowledge her, he was so deep in thought, and she quietly left the room.

Late the next afternoon he informed her that he'd take the job. She arranged a proper send off for him. The emotion in his eyes, as he walked down the corridors lined with officer and crewman alike, left more than a few with tears in their eyes. Tuvok even danced a few steps after a little prodding from the captain. Neelix saw his goals realized and left the ship with a clear conscience. Janeway was surprised at Naomi and how professionally she'd handled the send off. Owen had broken at the last moment and given the Talaxian a final hug good-bye.

Chapter 25

_** The fuzzy faced cook has left to join a colony of his people, Owen misses him greatly, I can't imagine why. He's having a tough time at the moment. Janeway and the Doctor were missing, they'd been captured by those bubble headed hierarchy aliens. The doctor almost got the captain killed, and Owen has suffered because of the worry it caused. Upon return, Janeway spent an entire week with Owen, completely off-duty, assuring him that she was uninjured. That proves to me how much she loves him. I didn't see her sneak a report even once, and the vacation has done her good. They have just, earlier this week, found a nebula that is simply infested with Borg, and wisely chose to steer clear of it. It appears my original plan to prod the captain into finding her heart and following it to her first officer, yes since marriage I've become a hopeless romantic, has produced no results. Even more daunting is the fact that Chuckles has started a relationship with Barbie of Borg. They've had two dates so far. It's thoroughly disgusting to watch. Another surprise has just crossed the Temporal Rift. It looks like our Captain in her old age has gotten soft where protocol and following directives are involved. She's come back in time to change the future, or should I say her past. Ugh, these time paradoxes give me a headache, and I create the damn things.**_

Janeway stared at herself on the view screen for a moment, before allowing the admiral to beam over. She looked the same except for a few more lines on her face and the distinguishing gray hair. "Commander you have the bridge, Tuvok..."

"Captain, if you don't mind," Chakotay interrupted. "I'd like to accompany you." He was worried about this. If that really was an older Kathryn Janeway, he wanted to be there to offer support for his captain and friend. She nodded to his relief, that alone proved that she was just as uptight as he thought.

"All right. Tom you have the bridge." She turned and exited the bridge.

"The admiral is ready for transport, ma'am." A young ensign informed them as they entered the transporter room.

"Good, energize." Janeway ordered. With a flash of the transporter's blue light an elderly Kathryn Janeway Appeared on the pad.

"Good morning, Captain. Sorry for the abrupt intrusion. I know what you're thinking and I suggest we go somewhere more private before I answer any questions. I suppose I should introduce myself first. I'm Admiral Kathryn Janeway, pleased to see you, both, again." For a moment there appeared in her blue eyes, longing and pain as she looked upon Chakotay.

A look passed between the captain and her first officer, she finally nodded and they escorted the self proclaimed Admiral to the ready room. Chakotay retreated to his seat on the bridge leaving his captain to handle this situation. He was a little shaken by the way the Admiral had looked at him, and wanted to calm down before speaking to her.

The captain had left her counterpart in sickbay under the doctor's supervision and went to have lunch with Owen, as she'd promised. The meal was refreshing until her combadge chirped and the doctor said that his charge had pulled-rank on him and left sickbay. Just as the connection broke Admiral Janeway entered the mess hall.

"Mama, who's that, she looks like you." Owen looked confused between the two of them. Kathryn pulled him into her lap and kissed his forehead.

"I know my Owen, I'm as confused as you, but don't worry, I've got you." She didn't know why she felt the need to comfort him as the Admiral walked over. She just felt that she should.

Admiral Janeway smiled poignantly at the little boy on Kathryn's lap. The same sadness and longing that had been in her eyes as she'd looked upon Seven and Chakotay could be seen now. Owen smiled softly and the old blue eyes filled with tears. This scared Kathryn more than she cared to admit, and she held her baby more tightly. Owen, being Owen, greeted the admiral before him enthusiastically.

"Hi, you're new, I never saw you on Voyager before, except that you look like my mama. I'm Owen. You probably already met Mama, she is the first to meet everyone that comes on board." He was more subdued than usual, but sounded sincere.

"Yes I have. Thank you. How are you today, Owen?"

"Good. We're having lunch right now. How'd you know my name?"

"I heard about you from your mother, little one."

"Oh, you want to eat with us?" He offered, warming to the older woman, and the Admiral looked as if she was about to cry. Kathryn watched her reaction and fear grew within her.

"I think the Admiral has already eaten, my Owen." She stressed the my for the way the admiral had looked longingly at him.

"She's right, and it looks as if you've finished your own meal, so I'll just have to eat dinner with you later."

"Okay. Mommy, can I go find Naomi now? We have lessons in sickbay this afternoon." She nodded.

"I'll help you, my Owen. I don't have to be back to the bridge for a little while yet." They left the mess with the Admiral trailing along.

"Owen would you mind terribly if I carried you?" The Admiral asked, she couldn't resist. Owen looked to Kathryn for a moment and though she didn't really feel comfortable with this request she knew with out a doubt that her elder self wouldn't harm their little boy, and she nodded slightly.

"Okay." He didn't seem to have picked up on her discomfort, and allowed the Admiral to lift him off the deck. This time a few tears escaped the woman's eyes as she held him a little tighter than was necessary. Owen wasn't bothered by this until she loosened her hold to a normal grip. "How I've missed holding you, little fox." Her words upset him, she shouldn't have known his special name that Mama called him. His mama was the only one to ever call him that. He turned in her arms to reach for his mama.

"Mama."

Kathryn pulled her Owen from her older self just as startled as her son. The Admiral looked as though she were about to break down, and Kathryn didn't know what to do. Before she could decide on a course of action though the elder woman turned and left them. Owen was holding tightly to her. "Mama how did she know my special name? Only you call me little fox, not even Chakotay does." She set Owen on his feet, there in the empty corridor, and knelt in front of him.

"Because she is me, my Owen. She used a device to come back in time from the future. Do you understand that?" He nodded.

"MmHmm, but that's against the Prime Directive right. So why did she do it?"

"Yes it is, and I'm trying to find out why she did this. But Owen, she is me, and I know that she would never hurt you. Just as I could never hurt you. I think that maybe in her time you're all grown up and she doesn't get to hold you like I do, and she misses that. I know I would. So, don't be afraid of her okay?" He nodded softly.

"Okay, I wasn't really scared just confused and I didn't know why she hugged me so tight like that. I was just a little worried." She smiled and kissed his little nose.

"I know, sweetheart, I was too. It's okay though. Now let's go and find Naomi." He smiled and nodded and off they went. Things continued to get more and more complicated over the next two days, until Voyager had exited the hub, destroyed the Borg sphere, and were on their way to earth.

Captain's Log Stardate -.-

"Two words. We're home. Gods I didn't think it would ever come true. Owen and Seven and the other crewmembers that I would have lost are safe. We're home. More specifically we've been back in the Alpha Quadrant for less than an hour. Tom is down in Sickbay where, B'elanna and their daughter, Miral, are doing just fine. Admiral Paris has decided to debrief the crew as soon as we make orbit so Starfleet has enough time to contact the families of the crew. He's also given me his personal guarantee that the former Maquis will not be prosecuted. I'm grateful. That just leaves the prospect of my shattered hopes. The Admiral told me that Chakotay and Seven will marry. I had convinced myself that she was delusional until I saw the way Seven watched my First Officer accept the con, not ten minutes ago. Now all I can do is wish them well and stay away. At least I have Owen.

"It was very surreal to walk onto the bridge and see an older version of myself debriefing the crew, or to enter the mess hall and see Owen sitting on her lap listening in rapt attention to a tale she was spinning. Her reaction to him startled me, even scared me, but she didn't threaten him in anyway, and when I stopped it was plain to see the utter devastation on her face as she watched him. That scared me even more, but when she told me that Seven and Owen were going to be killed, and Tuvok would effectively loose his mind, I was determined to get them out of the Delta Quadrant. She obviously survived loosing him, but I am not her and I didn't want to try to survive.

"I'm so very glad that we did have our cake and eat it too. I'm very glad to have met her, and I'm still getting used to the fact that we're home. I foresee a lot of adjustments that will be hard for the crew, and I fear most of all for Owen and Naomi. Voyager's first children have never spent more than a few days on a planet neither have they been separated from the rest of the crew and each other, and I don't know what kind of problems to anticipate. Despite the age differences that are now between them they remain close, Naomi looks on Owen like a little brother.

"I also find myself dreading the debriefings. I'll have to explain Owen's existence and I fear for his life now. Especially after the Admiral's warning. They took her Owen from her; will they do the same to me? By Starfleet Law he is an abomination, a clone. It took years and years and a lucky break for the doctor that proved cloning organs was prudent to saving lives. Owen is not just an organ, he's a person. I'm afraid of the reaction Starfleet will have to him. Seven and Icheb's acceptance should be moot by now. Icheb wishes to enroll at the Academy, and it remains to be seen what Seven's desires are. The doctor already has job offers in Starfleet medical. Harry has decided to take some leave after the debriefings to spend time with his family. Tom and B'elanna are going to do the same, no doubt Tom will introduce his beloved to the real Sandrine. Tuvok, I assume, I know better than to pry, will return to Vulcan to acquire the cure for his degenerative disease."

"As for me, I'm going home. I'm going to Indiana, as soon as I can. I fear it will be a while. I'll be leaving Owen with Tom and B'elanna for a day or so to try tell my mother that she's now a Grandmother. No matter what Starfleet thinks of him or decides about him, he's staying with me. I'll kidnap him if I have to. I also want a little time to just be her daughter. Somehow I never got around to introducing my mother to my son, but in some ways it will be easier to tell her about him. Then there's Phoebe, I can't wait to see my little sister again, to meet her husband and children, I want to find out what happened to Molly, my dog. Perhaps she's still with Mark and his wife. I suppose I'll find out. For the moment, Owen is on his way to me, and I'm going to let him sit with me on the bridge for the final approach. We're home." The recording ended just in time to miss the call of the door.

Owen entered in a frenzy a look of apprehension on his face. The look changed as soon as he saw her, "Mommy, you're okay! It was really scary in Naomi's quarters. There was a lot of crashes and bright flashes, and I was crying. I wanted to be with you." She gathered him close into her lap.

"I know, sweetheart, I'm sorry, there was a battle, and the ride got rough. That's all over now, though. Guess what, we're home in the Alpha Quadrant, near Earth. Back in the places I've told you about, and the places we saw on the holodecks, now I can take you there for real."

"But, Mama, what about Voyager? Voyager is our home."

"Little fox, we're going to a new home. People get new homes all the time." He looked thoughtful for a moment.

"Is it gonna be a big home, cause if we're all gonna live there it'll hafta be big enough."

"Owen, the crew will have their own homes to go to. It will be just you and me like in our quarters."

"You mean, they're gonna leave like Neelix left, and I won't see them anymore. I don't want them to go, Mama." The alarm in his voice caused a tightness in Kathryn's chest.

"I know you don't, but they have lives that will take them away for a while. You'll still see Tom, B'elanna and Harry. You can go visit them and they can come and see us. You're going to meet new friends too, Owen. You'll get to meet your Aunt Phoebe, and your grandma."

"But what about Commander Chakotay, I don't want him to leave either. I want to stay here, and see them all the time. If I don't see B'elanna all the time who's gonna help her with the baby?"

"You'll have to go see her very often, Owen. It's going to be okay. As for Chakotay, he is from a different planet, not Earth, he may want to go there and see the family he has left. You'll still see him too, just not quite as often."

"You promise?" Tears had gathered in his eyes.

"I do. Owen, it's going to be different and things are going to be hard for a while, but it will be good, I promise you." She poured every ounce of sincerity she had into the promise. While holding him tightly.

"Okay. Mama, you're not gonna go away too, are you?!" This time there was panic coloring his voice.

"No! I am not going to ever leave you. You're stuck with me, `causeyou are my little fox, and I love you." Her statement had started out fervent to make him understand that she'd fight for him and had ended soft to comfort and reassure.

"Good, I love you too, Mom." He held her back in relief.

"Let's go sit on the bridge, you can be my first officer for a little while until Tom gets back from Sickbay." She stood and took his hand leading him toward the ready room door.

Owen stopped and tilted his head to one side in consternation, "Did he get injured in the battle, Mama?"

"No, B'elanna had her baby. Tom went to see his daughter."

"She did! Wow, I'm supposed to help her you know."

"Yes she did, and you'll do a wonderful job. Come on. You can sit in Chakotay's chair." They entered and she got him settled into the second command chair before taking her seat.

_** "I'll be damned, she got them home early, and in one piece. I'm so glad."**_

Chapter 26

The debriefings took two weeks, but finally they'd ended. Admiral Paris went to bat for his namesake when Starfleet balked that he was a clone. They were now in the sixth day of the board of inquiry. She'd handled the whole of this trial alone. She was still hurting at the loss of Chakotay, and the only other people that knew he was a clone were on Vulcan or still being examined by the best holoprogramers in Starfleet. Admiral Paris had finally taken matters into his own hands today. Tom and B'elanna were sitting behind Kathryn and Owen where they stood in front of the line of Admirals.

"Captain, you know full well the policies of Starfleet concerning clones." The admiral waited for her nod. "Why then did you not follow those policies when you found this clone?" There was a gasp from Janeway's officers.

"I've never agreed with Starfleet policies in this area, and by the time I found out about his unique origins, it was way past too late for the stated actions to be taken. He was already a part of me. I wasn't going to lose the only chance at happiness I had out there. I followed protocol concerning shipboard romance and the captain. I was alone, and he gave me back the life I'd lost over the first four years of our journey. If I couldn't have a husband I was at least going to keep my child. He is my child too, I may not have given birth to him, but he is made up of me, solely of me, and I will not lose him.

"He let me be myself and not a captain twenty-four hours a day. I loved him from the moment I saw him sitting on that bio-bed. Two years old and scared to death. I wasn't allowed to love anyone else aboard, not tangibly, so I followed my heart and loved my child. Finding out that he was my genetic match was just icing on the cake. I have raised this child to believe he is a normal child. I've never treated him any differently than a mother would her child. He's my son and he always has been." Her arms had gone around Owen who stood tucked against her side. He held tightly to her right leg as his tears fell. He was afraid of the people sitting above them and his mama was worried about something. He was feeding off of her emotions at this point and was disturbed by her tension.

She lifted him off the floor and held him tightly, but tenderly. Her little fox held her back and buried his face in her shoulder. "It's okay, baby. Mommy's got you." She whispered to him. "I love you, my little Fox. Hold tight now." He did and she continued to listen to the Admirals debate and berate her actions. A voice behind her silenced all the other chatter in the room.

"Admirals, please, may I speak." Tom had stood and was waiting for the answer.

"Of course, step down and speak." The admiral conducting the hearing indicated the floor where Kathryn stood holding Owen.

Tom walked down the isle and came to stand beside Janeway. "I want to speak on Owen's behalf. Captain Janeway was the most unhappy person aboard at the time Owen appeared. She was aloof from the crew, and had almost become a hermit in her ready room. Morale was fair, but would have been better if she'd felt better. When Owen came aboard and she started to care for him and took him in, she became the person I had heard my father speak of. She was out going, fun and loved to be around her crew. Owen made her see that she could still control the ship and have a life outside of her duty. I promise you that if the rest of her crew, no her family, were here we'd all be standing right where I am now. No I take that back. We'd be standing here." He moved in front of Kathryn and Owen, and B'elanna came to join him. "We'd gladly stand between a little boy that we all love and the people who wish to harm him. I'd go back to New Zealand before I'd let any of you touch this little boy."

"And so would I." B'elanna added. She stepped back and linked hands with her captain. "So would everyone else from the crew of Voyager."

Owen Paris stepped down from his seat on the board and took up Kathryn's other side. "I would too. Just read her logs concerning this boy. He's not what Starfleet feared a clone would be." He lifted Owen from Kathryn's arms and into his own, and she started to protest. Owen reached for her.

"Mama!" Paris would not let go, but stayed by Kathryn's side.

"Owen give him back, he's scared," Kathryn stated as her baby wailed for her. She reached up and took his little hands when it became clear that the admiral was not letting go of the child. "Its okay sweetheart, I'm right here." Still he continued to wail for her. Ever since Q had taken him from her arms he'd reacted this way to someone taking him from her unexpectedly. She was furious at her former commanding officer, but there was nothing she could do for the moment.

"This child is his own person. He deserves the right to exist as much as my granddaughter, as much as your children do. Yes he may be more like his mother than other children are like theirs, but so what. I, for one, think it wouldn't be a bad thing to have another Kathryn Janeway out there." He watched his peers above him and gauged that this was the right moment for his coup of this hearing.

"I say we vote now and end this nonsense. I want to go home and enjoy being a grandfather, I want to spend time with my newly returned son and there are other parents out there waiting to see their returned children as well." The rest of the admiralty agreed that it was best to vote now. Paris gave Owen back to his mother, and resumed his place in the line. Her Owen latched onto her in terror. She held him just as tightly to reassure him. "I've got you now, little fox." Kathryn, her officers and Owen were dismissed to an anteroom to await the decision.

"Why didn't you tell us, Captain?" B'elanna asked her.

"I was going to be in enough trouble with the crew for adopting Owen like I did. I didn't want him to experience the ridicule and scorn that some would have shown him had it been widely known just how unique he was. Tuvok and Chakotay were the only ones that knew aside from the doctor, who was the first to know it anyway." She was still holding onto Owen like a lifeline, and Tom came up behind her to give both Janeways a comforting squeeze. Both he and B'elanna noted how she hadn't referred to him as a clone even once.

"Don't worry, Captain. We're just a little shocked, but we're on your side. Owen is a part of our shipwide family. We aren't going to let anything happen to him." B'elanna joined them for an embrace and the tears that Kathryn had held back through the whole process finally broke free and trailed down her face.

"Thank you." All she could muster was a whisper as they disengaged. She sank onto a bench and rocked Owen as the tears continued to fall. B'elanna sat with them until they were called back into the courtroom. The admiral that had been questioning and berating Janeway looked irate, and the three Voyager's took this as a good sign.

Janeway retained full parental rights, and the officers breathed a collective sigh of relief. During the whole process Kathryn had avoided contact with Chakotay and Seven. She even declined an invitation to the banquet thrown in honor of their return. She'd spoken with Tom and B'elanna as soon as the court session ended and asked them if they'd watch Owen for a couple days while she went to talk to her mother and sister.

They agreed to watch him, readily, and were going to take him to the party with them. She'd asked Owen if he'd mind staying with them and had to promise once again that she'd never leave him, she stayed with him the night of that last day in court. They'd stayed in Tom and B'elanna's extra room and Owen slept while Kathryn watched him reveling in her victory with him tucked against her side protectively. In the end he was happy to stay with Tom and B'elanna.

Chapter 27

"Tom, take the baby, I need to get Owen ready." B'elanna Torres-Paris, closed the distance between them to hand over his newborn daughter and share a brief kiss.

"Here, I've got her, but I could help Owen." The infant slept soundly in his arms, and he still, even after almost a week, marveled at how much joy he felt just holding her.

"I still haven't decided what he's going to wear, Tom. Just take care of her while I get him ready." He nodded and B'elanna led their guest out of the room. Tom took the time to study his daughter again. He'd been doing that a lot over the last few days. She was perfect in his eyes. Her skin was a little lighter in color than B'elanna's and the brow ridges a bit softer, but she looked just like her mother, and she already had her father wrapped securely around her little finger. All too soon, B'elanna and Owen were back and the four of them left their temporary home to attend the party.

Like the Captain, not all chose to attend, but except for Janeway the entire command staff was present. Harry had brought his parents along, and delighted in introducing them to his friends. Chakotay and Seven were present, but they didn't appear to be together. Seven looked a little forlorn where she stood with Icheb. Chakotay was chatting easily with Admiral Paris when the four late-comers entered the room. The two men stood as they approached the table.

"You're late, son. Baby, hold you up?" The Admiral asked.

"No, the captain's son and my wife. She hadn't picked out anything for him to wear until it was past time to leave." He shook Chakotay's hand and hugged his father. Their relationship was on the mend finally. Apparently grandchildren can bridge all gaps.

"Where is your mom, anyway?" He asked Owen. Owen Paris hadn't seen his surrogate daughter since the last day of the tribunal regarding her son's fate. "She better not be back to work already."

"No, she left two days ago and went to Indiana. I think she wanted a couple days to talk to her mother about Owen, and in general get to know her family again. If she doesn't show tonight she's going to contact us in the morning." B'elanna answered for Owen, with a close eye on her long time friend. The quickly masked disappointment explained a lot.

Owen pulled his hand from Tom's and threw his little arms around Chakotay's leg. "Hi." Chakotay laughed in spite of himself.

"Hi yourself, little man. How have you been?" He smiled as Owen's arms tightened on his leg.

"Good, I haven't seen you, but that's okay `cause Mama said that things were gonna be different and I wouldn't see everyone as much." His little head was leaned back to look up at the man who was once a Commander. He, as many others, hadn't decided whether to return to Starfleet or not. They felt it was time for a little peace. "She said that you might leave and go back to the planet that you lived on."

"I hadn't really decided, but the last few days I was in deep conversation with my Spirit Guide, there were some things that I had to work out." He looked across at Seven. For a split second B'elanna and Tom saw guilt and regret in his eyes.

"What are you gonna do now then?" Owen called his attention back.

"I don't really know, look for a house, find a few hobbies, decide which anthropology grant is best for me. I don't want to be stuck behind a desk for the rest of my career, but I don't think I'll miss any of the excitement that we saw before." Chakotay lifted the five-year-old off the floor. He'd turned five just days earlier.

"Mommy said the same thing. She wants me to get to know her family. I'm kinda scared to meet them though." The others had ceased to exist for Owen, he was talking only to Chakotay now. They knew they had and conversed among themselves taking seats around the table after B'elanna relinquished her daughter to Admiral Paris.

"Why are you scared?" Chakotay settled into a chair with Owen on his lap.

"What if they don't like me? What if because of the trial, `cause I'm different they don't want me around?" To Owen this was a legitimate concern.

"They won't be like that Owen. When they see how much your mother loves you they will love you too."

"I hope so, and I hope Mommy comes tonight. I miss her." Owen turned and settled back against the only father he'd ever known to watch the dancers sway to the soft music.

"I'm sure she misses you too, Owen." Chakotay's arms encircled the confused little boy and hugged tight. Owen held onto Chakotay's hands and began to feel like everything was going to be okay for the first time since they'd landed on this new planet that his mama called home.

Chapter 28

Two days earlier

"Mom, she's here." Phoebe called and opened the door. Walking up the sidewalk and onto the porch was her older sister, once believed to be lost forever, now back to ease the worry that had taken residence in their hearts since learning of her plight. As soon as Kathryn was close enough Phoebe threw her arms around the sister she thought she'd never see again. "Oh, it's so good to see you, Kath." Unbidden the tears came to both women's eyes, and to the eyes of the older woman as she watched her daughters embrace.

Kathryn pulled back when she saw her mother in the doorway. "Oh, Mom. I never thought I'd see either of you again." She clung to her mother trying to make herself believe it was real, that it wasn't a dream. She was home. The strong grip her mother put on her helped to drive it home that she was indeed awake, and then the sobs of joy started. The two of them sank to their knees on the hardwood porch and clung to each other. Phoebe joined them in their embrace and they reveled in the happiness for a long time.

It was Gretchen that finally pulled them all back and got them into the house. Dinner was on the table, after all, didn't want it getting too cold.

The conversation was raucous during their meal. This was their time to get reacquainted and women love to talk. Kathryn spoke of a few of her adventures, and listened to her sister tell about her husband and daughters. Gretchen adding her own stories and comments. They talked long into the night and then resumed as if they hadn't stopped the next morning. Phoebe had to return to her family a little after the noon hour, but promised to return before too long. She wanted to bring them to meet Kathryn. It was then that Kathryn took her mother for a walk in the fields and along the stream surrounding her childhood home.

"Mom, there's something I wanted to tell you without Phoebe here. I wanted you to be the first to know, and I want you to keep an open mind." Gretchen had slowed her pace as Kathryn talked, her daughter's tone was serious and it worried her.

"What is it, Kathryn?"

"I...Gods this is hard." She took a deep breath. "Mom, I have a son."

"Kathryn Elizabeth Janeway if you ever scare me like that again-" Gretchen was holding a hand over her heart.

"Wait, there's more to it than that. He's more than my son, Mom. It's just been easier on the both of us to say he's my son. He's really a clone of me, mother. The why and how are a very long story, and I'm going to tell it to you."

"How old is he?" She didn't look disturbed at the prospect of Kathryn's revelation.

"He's just turned five, on the thirtieth, and he's as precocious as can be. He's too smart for his own good." She then told her mother the whole story of Owen's origin as they walked. She stopped every once in a while to remember and describe specific things in more detail, but eventually she finished and found that they'd settled on the porch steps of her mother's home. It was late in the afternoon, and Phoebe would be returning soon.

"You shouldn't have worried Kathryn. He sounds like a remarkable child. I'd like to see pictures if you have them."

"They're upstairs with my things, he is remarkable, and I know I didn't have to tell you all of this, but I didn't want to lie to you or mislead you. I just wanted you to understand about him, to accept him. I don't want him to have any problems because of this. He's as much my child as," she paused to search for an appropriate analogy, "well, as I am yours. The tribunal at Starfleet was bad enough. They painted him as less than a human, and I don't want him thinking that way. I hadn't planned on him knowing at all, about being a clone. I was going to let him grow up believing that he was like any other child. Tom assures me that he's doing okay, that knowing hasn't changed him at all, but I still worry, and being cut off from Chakotay isn't helping him at all. Owen misses him tremendously." She lapsed into a depressed silence for a moment.

"Who is Chakotay, Kathryn?"

"He's the Maquis leader that I was sent to capture. He became my First Officer when we merged the two crews. He wasn't the monster that Starfleet painted him, and has become a dear friend." Mother's intuition kicked in for Gretchen Janeway and she wondered if there was something more between her daughter and this man. She watched for a moment and decided not, but it wasn't for lack of desire. She could also see that there was something standing between them now. Something her daughter believed was impenetrable.

"And Owen is fond of him?" She prodded gently.

"He adores him, and vice versa. You could say that Chakotay is the closest thing that Owen has to a father. Chakotay's been in Owen's life as much as I have. He took care of Owen when I was on away missions, and helped me keep tabs on him when I wasn't. He helped me take care of Owen when he was ill, and he'd do anything for him. He spent time with him just to spend time with him. Chakotay scrimped and saved his holodeck rations a few months back just so he could take Owen on a four day camping trip, under the guise of teaching him survival skills. That is so like Chakotay." The exasperation, affection and humor in her voice settled another piece of the puzzle into place. Her daughter was in love with this man, had been long before her son had come into the picture.

"He'll be okay, Kathryn. Kids are very resilient, besides he has you to love him. I always knew you'd make a wonderful mother." Kathryn's eyes filled with tears at her declaration of faith.

"Thank you." After that she retrieved the pictures and told her mother more about Owen. Gretchen marveled at the likeness between Kathryn and Owen, and from the stories Owen was as spirited as Kathryn had been at his age. They continued talking of Owen and others on Voyager until Phoebe and her family arrived. Kathryn met her brother-in-law and her nieces, and let herself get to know them. Her heart was half the country away though in Tom and B'elanna's temporary home. Gretchen could see this and suggested an early evening so that she could retire to her room and contact her son. It was clear that she'd rarely been away from him for more than a few hours at a time. Kathryn was grateful to her and took the out as soon as she'd presented it.

The next morning she sat down with Phoebe and told her about her nephew. The rest of the day was spent suffering Phoebe's prodding and pestering. She wanted to go to the party and meet her nephew. It was Gretchen eventually saying that she wouldn't mind going as well that had Kathryn frantically changing into her dress and fixing her make-up and hair. They were already thirty minutes late. She thanked the spirits for transporters.

Chapter 29

Owen and B'elanna had just gotten onto the Dance floor. She was teaching him a formal waltz when Kathryn and her mother and sister walked in. Owen spotted them almost immediately, and ditched B'elanna in mid-step. He'd been watching the door since it was stated Kathryn might be there. "Hey!" B'elanna protested.

"Mommy's here!" He called back excitedly. B'elanna smiled at his excitement, and then was swept back into the dance by her husband, who'd been watching and waiting for a good chance to cut in. Once they'd gotten through the door, Kathryn scanned the crowd for familiar faces in general, and Owen in particular. She quickly spotted him dancing with B'elanna. He spotted her a scant second later and she waved at him becoming a bit exasperated at the hold up. She and her mother and sister had been approached by and were now talking to one of her father's old friends.

She was being polite and making all the right noises at all the right times, but what she really wanted to do was rush over and cut in on B'elanna. She didn't get the chance, even as she watched, Owen left B'elanna mid-step and weaved his way through the throng of dancing couples. He finally hit the edge of the dance floor and the crowd thinned rapidly. As soon as it did he made a bee-line for her.

"Mama! You're here, I've been watching ever since B'elanna said you might come." He said as soon as he was within range.

Kathryn was thankful she'd decided on the longer dress as she squatted down to hug him tightly. "Oh, my Owen, I've missed you so much." She kissed his slightly flushed cheek and he returned the favor. "I missed you too, and do you know what?" She shook her head in the negative. "I don't like Tom and B'elanna's baby. All she does is cry." Kathryn couldn't help but laugh at his look of childish disgust.

"That's what babies do, sweetheart." She stood and took his hand. "Come on, let's catch up to Mom, and Phoebe. When she started toward her mother, who had pretended not to notice the reunion between mother and son, Owen stooped causing his hand to pull out of her loose grip.

"Mommy?" She turned back worried.

"What, baby? Is something wrong?" The negative head shake eased the worry.

"No, I want up, please." He extended his arms up to her. "Please, Mama, would you carry me?"

"I think I can do that." Kathryn lifted him off the ground. "Ooph, oh boy, you're getting so big." She started on her way again, and smiled when her Owen rested his head on her shoulder and sighed his content to just be carried. Janeway caught up to her mother at the table where Admiral Paris sat with his wife, who was cradling Tom's daughter and Tom, who'd just returned from his half-song dance with B'elanna. When the Parises caught sight of her Mrs. Paris stood and enfolded her, Owen and all, in an embrace.

"Kathryn, it's so good to see you. Welcome home."

"It's good to be seen and thank you." She shifted Owen a little so that most of his weight rested on her hip. "How have you been?"

"Wonderful, thank you, and thank you for bringing Tom home in one piece." The older woman looked as if she were going to cry she was so grateful.

"It's my job to get my crew home, but I can't take all the credit for this homecoming. We worked hard to get home and the fact is we wouldn't have made it without the help of all our crew." At that her gaze swept the room taking in all of her crew members present.

"Have a seat Cap, ah, Kathryn." Tom said. "Owen must be getting heavy, the way you keep shifting him around." At his mention of Owen, Gretchen looked up from her deep conversation with Admiral Paris and finally took note of the child in her daughter's arms.

"This is the Owen I've heard so much about over the last two days?" She asked as Kathryn settled into an empty seat. She studied the boy carefully for a few seconds and rounded the table to get a better look at him. She could see the little girl Kathryn had been, but there were differences that could be attributed to his being a boy. She was amazed at how much the little boy looked like her husband. Kathryn had always and continued to look more like her.

"Yes, Mom, this is Owen. Owen this is my mother, Gretchen, your grandma." Owen lifted his head from her shoulder studying the face that was studying him. After a moment his mouth broke into a soft, lopsided smile, that Gretchen knew was Kathryn's, it always had been, even as a baby.

"You look like Mama." The table broke into smiles then as the tension of a first meeting was dispelled.

"Thank you, you look like her yourself, and I'm very glad to meet you. Would you mind terribly if I held you for a moment Owen?" He shook his head no and reached out to Gretchen. She smiled and lifted him from Kathryn's lap to cradle him in her arms. Kathryn watched almost overwhelmed.

"I'm glad to meet you too, Mama told me all about you and she showed me a picture too. It had you and Mama and another lady."

"Phoebe." Kathryn supplied for him. It was then that Owen noted Chakotay's absence from the group he'd left not so long before.

"Hey, where's Chakotay? He didn't leave did he?" He looked around them slightly panicked. "I wanted to say goodbye. I didn't get to say goodbye." He sounded like he was about to cry.

"He didn't leave, Owen." Tom tried to calm him, but tears were rolling down Owen's little face while he searched the room frantically. "Owen Edward Janeway, look at me." Tom's use of his full name got his attention back, and Tom came to stand beside the boy. "He's making a circuit of the room. He wanted to talk to people that he might never see again after tonight. He said he'd be back. Saving the best for last I suppose. Stick around and you'll see him again."

"Okay. Thank you, Tom." He took a deep breath and calmed down settling back against his grandmother. Gretchen watched her daughter at the mention of Chakotay. Her face fell at the same time her being lit with the anticipation of seeing him again. Kathryn, however, chose to ignore her feelings in favor of steering the conversation away from him.

"Speaking of missing persons, where are B'elanna and Phoebe?"

Tom answered first. "Well, I don't know about Phoebe, but B'e went to find Harry after our dance. She's going to bring him over."

Gretchen gave her the second answer. "Phoebe ran into an old friend, and I left her talking with him when I spotted this group."

"One of the crew?" If one of her crew members had known her sister it would have been nice to know.

"No, one of the family members, I'm not sure who they were. Someone she knew in college most likely." Gretchen supplied, "There she comes now."

Phoebe shortly walked up and greeted the table casually before turning her attention to the little boy in her mother's arms. "You have just got to be Owen." He nodded, looking toward his mama, a little unsure. "Well, I'm your Aunt Phoebe."

"Okay." Kathryn nodded at him reassuring. She had wondered how he'd react to her sister's boisterous nature. Her mother's softer approach was better to use with Owen. She had been the same way as a child, and her dislike of her rambunctious sister had been widely known. She had preferred to curl up, and read a book under the branches of a tree or willow, willows were the best because the branches hung around and hid you from view.

"It's okay to be a little shy. You don't know me after all, but we'll change that. How do you like earth so far?" Kathryn could tell that he was warming to Phoebe as she quieted down. Maybe Phoebe had noticed his apprehension, or more likely she remembered how her sister had been.

"I haven't seen that much of it. Just Starfleet Headquarters and Tom and B'elanna's house. It's okay I guess." His tone indicated that it wasn't nearly as good as Voyager though.

"Well, we'll have to get you to Indiana. It's quieter there. You'll love it. Lots of places to run and play, things to be discovered. I bet you like to study things like your mommy." Owen shrugged.

"I liked my classes at home. Learning to read and things like that. Mommy said that I'd get to go there, to Indiana, soon."

"Tonight actually, that's why I'm here, little fox." She accepted him back on her lap, and hugged him close again.

"Oh good, I missed you Mommy. I mean I like to stay with Tom and B'elanna, but you're the best."

If she hadn't already adored the little pest she surely would have after that comment. "I missed you too, my Owen." The endearment earned her a Janeway trademark smile. Conversations had resumed again after the initial greeting and continued for a time until B'elanna returned with Harry and his parents. Harry introduced them, and after that round of pleasantries and a few more chairs added to accommodate their growing number, general conversation once again started. It was interrupted only by people leaving to dance or returning to grab a new partner. Owen got the chance to make up for ditching B'elanna and learned a few new dances from Kathryn and Gretchen. Kathryn danced with both Tom and Harry, and Admiral Paris too, just for good measure. Eventually, Owen even danced with Phoebe. After a while, as Tom had promised, Chakotay reappeared. He came to the table with an unfamiliar man trailing him. Chakotay greeted everyone, giving a longing look at Kathryn. His greeting was returned by everyone except Kathryn who studied the man behind him. She didn't acknowledge Chakotay until he introduced the newcomer.

"Guess who this is." He was addressing his fellow Voyager crew, but looking solely at Kathryn.

"I have no idea, Chakotay." She answered.

"The first Starfleet officer on earth that we talked to live in seven years." He had a cute smile going.

"Lieutenant Barclay." She stood helping Owen to land on his feet. The boy promptly rounded the table to Chakotay's side. "I've been waiting to meet you."

"The Barclay that made contact with Voyager last year." Tom was slightly in awe.

"The one and only, Son. He went about it in an unconventional manner, but I'm grateful he did. How are you, Reg?" The admiral had risen from his chair and shook Barclay's hand.

"Fine, sir, and thank you Admiral, I was just trying to help." The man sounded shy and his speech held a slight stutter. Kathryn wanted to put him at ease and extended her hand to him.

"Well, Mr. Barclay, I finally get to meet my honorary crew member. I was starting to think you'd forgotten about us."

"Oh, never, Captain Janeway. I've just had other duties to attend." He looked a kind and gentle man, and seemed to be in awe of her and the other Voyager crew.

"I understand all too well about duty, and my name is Kathryn. I made it clear on Voyager that when I'm off duty, I'm Kathryn. Well, at least since Owen arrived."

"Right Capt-, Kathryn. I'll try to remember that, but, ah, if I may, who is Owen?"

"Owen is my son." She indicated the boy now in Chakotay's arms.

"Your...son. How, I mean, I don't want to pry, of course, but he wasn't in any of the logs or data you sent."

"No I did that on purpose. Any data or log entry containing any mention of Owen was encrypted to be seen by Admiral Paris only. Owen is a very delicate subject, considering his timely arrival."

"Oh, because of the fraternization protocol." Barclay stated.

"In a manner of speaking, but only a small part of it." She wished the conversation would move on to other topics.

Barclay could sense her reluctance to talk about the subject further. So he backed down. "He's a good looking boy, Captain, you must be proud."

"I am, very proud, and my name-"

"Give it up, Captain." Tom cut her off. "It's a habit to call you that, and among the crew at least I'd say it's become more a term of endearment than a title. You're _our_ captain."

A new voice cut in from apparently no where. "He's right, Kathy, in all of the organization called Starfleet you are probably the only person that can be referred to as just 'the captain' in a conversation and the participants automatically think of you." The voice came from behind her, but she didn't need to see a face to know it was Q. Like before her reaction was instantaneous.

"Chakotay!" She called a warning as she rushed to them and took possession of her son. Only when Owen was in her arms and Chakotay stood beside them protecting, did she turn around to look at Q. He had a look of boredom on his face. The rest of the table was shocked at her actions.

"Kathy, please, I'm a Q of my word. I believe our time traveling Admiral proved that to you."

"Not much of a reference. You could have saved her Owen's life, you didn't. I'd much prefer a living son, even if it means dealing with you."

"Noted Kathy," he sighed, "I just dropped in to congratulate you on getting home."

"And that's all?" Chakotay sounded suspicious.

"Yes that's all, well, and to thank you again for helping with Q2. He's been so much better since his stay on Voyager."

"You're welcome, and thank you for both the congratulations and the reassurance." Her reply was filled with suspicion and she still eyed him warily.

"You too are most welcome, and I hope you won't mind my dropping in to say hello now and again."

"So long as you remember your word." She warned icily.

"Of course, I'll be taking my leave then. Farewell, take good care of him, Kathy." Q disappeared before she could say anything else. She and Chakotay were oblivious to the questions and exclamations from their companions while checking themselves and Owen. "Thank you, Chakotay, you're always there when I need you aren't you?"

"Anytime Kathryn, you know that." He smiled that smile for her. "How about you Owen, are you okay?"

"Yes, 'cept, Mommy's squishing me." He neglected to add that he was holding her as tightly as she was him.

"Sorry, little fox. I was scared for you." She made herself loosen her grip.

"That's okay, Mommy. I was scared too. I don't like that man." He shook his head for emphasis. The rest of the group now demanded attention standing and asking questions. The loudest voice belonging to Admiral Paris.

"Who the hell was that? What the hell was that?"

It was Barclay who answered him. "That was Q. He used to toy with Captain Picard. He scared me mostly even when he served on the Enterprise when he was a mortal, as punishment or something."

"So that's what happened when Owen went missing those few days. It really was Q." Tom never missed an opportunity to gather more information on a confusing subject.

"Yes that's what happened." Chakotay answered still protecting Kathryn and Owen, who were still gathering their wits. Gretchen and Owen Paris both saw the unspoken communication between the former command team. Chakotay didn't move from their side until Kathryn silently asked him to.

"How did we get him back anyway? All we know is that you called off the search and two day's later Owen was back in the mess hall screaming his lungs out after the captain left for the bridge."

Kathryn answered this time, having found her voice. "We had a little help from Q's better half. You remember that don't you Tom?"

"Unfortunately we all do." Harry cut in.

"I know how you feel Harry. Anyway, Owen and I have had enough excitement for one night. Haven't we sweetheart?" Owen nodded plainly still shaken. "I think we'll call it a night. The rest of you enjoy yourselves. Mom, you don't have to leave now. I'll have us transported straight to Indiana, and get a taxi to the farm."

"Okay dear, just take care of yourselves. I won't be too long." She watched her daughter closely. The exchange between her and her first officer had alluded to a long-standing and deep friendship.

Owen Paris stood to embrace her and Owen. "I see now why you regretted having to take the communicator off him." Other good-byes followed and promises to keep in touch. Finally, she began making her way to the door. Chakotay watched for a moment before deciding to follow her. He heard Gretchen ask if she was okay and what had just happened. Chakotay tore his gaze away from the two most important people in his life to answer her.

"She'll be okay after a couple hours making sure Owen is still with her. Kathryn is always like this after Q makes an appearance ever since Q took him. It unnerves her, she told you about Owen's origins?" Kathryn's mother nodded. "That was the being she told you about. He took Owen from her about two years ago, right out of her arms. He was missing for a week, and Kathryn nearly killed herself trying to get him back."

"I heard that part, not about Kath nearly killing herself, but the kidnapping. Will she be okay with him?"

"She will, but I think I'll walk them out to be sure." He nodded farewell to the table and gave hugs to his shipmates, promising to drop in and visit Tom, B'elanna, and baby Miral sometime the next week, then he followed the path that Kathryn had taken, at a trot.

"He won't be back." Tom and Harry snickered at B'elanna's comment.

"What do you mean?" Barclay asked.

"When Chakotay is worried about one of those two he generally sticks close to whichever one it is he's worried about. We don't see much of him when he's like this. I wouldn't be surprised if he escorts them all the way back to Indiana."

Harry added, "Especially, when he's worried about Owen and Q is involved. He likes to reassure the captain that he's there to help if she needs it. I think he likes to be sure that Owen is okay anyway. Chakotay loves that kid with all his heart."

"Owen is no different. He is very fond of the commander." Seven had joined them after Chakotay and Kathryn had gone.

"Is that so surprising?" Tom asked. "Chakotay has been a father to Owen. He's the one that took over for the captain in the void. When she could barely function Chakotay took care of Owen and the ship. I wouldn't be surprised if he stays the night with them to be certain that they're okay."

Chapter 30

As the speculation and conversation continued inside, Chakotay caught up with Kathryn and Owen outside as she was waiting for a cab. "Kathryn, wait!"

"What is it, did we forget something?" She and Owen were watching him approach them.

"No, I was just wondering if I could give you a ride to the transport station. It would help save on the cab." The look Owen gave made up Kathryn's already half-made mind.

"That would be nice. Thank you, Chakotay."

"Good," he smiled, "right this way, I have a transport." Kathryn settled Owen in the back seat and climbed in after him as Chakotay seated himself behind the controls. He made sure they were strapped in and then headed off. Kathryn's directions to the station were the only words spoken on the way. Chakotay was fine with the silence as he watched them in the rear monitor. Owen was sitting, as close as the restraints would allow, tucked against his mother. Kathryn was leaning over him her cheek resting on the top of his head and her left arm across his shoulders and down his side holding him close. Her right hand was in both of her little boy's hands. From the looks on their faces, Owen was calm but still a little frightened, and Kathryn was shaky and terrified. She'd reacted the same way the last time Q showed. He'd been much the same way, himself. When they arrived they entered the quiet lobby reminiscent of a doctor's office waiting room. The walls were a neutral tone, and the music playing was making the clientele, families and friends waiting for loved ones to beam in, drowsy. The former command team walked up to the on-duty officer, and Chakotay let Kathryn explain where they wanted to go.

The woman passed them through a door into the Transporter Room proper and they stepped up onto a transporter pad. Owen clenched his arms and legs around Kathryn in fear. Ever since his first experience he'd been afraid of the beams. Kathryn was convinced that it was a childhood fear and he'd grow out of it in time. This was Chakotay's last thought before the three of them were enveloped by two beams, and they reappeared in an identical room in Indiana. They exited the transporter room and Chakotay requested a cab. By the time they made their way outside the cab was waiting. Kathryn gave the driver directions and they were on their way. Owen, snuggled between them, fell asleep somewhere in the middle of the fifteen minute drive. Kathryn stopped the driver before he could turn onto the long dirt road to her mother's home. She lifted Owen out of the car and thanked the driver while Chakotay watched her in confusion. The night was mild and the moon was bright enough to see clearly. He waited until the cab was gone before he asked what they were doing.

"I wanted to walk a little while. That might help me to calm down, and it's been so long since I walked under the Indiana sky. I just felt it was the right time to do that again. It's always helped me calm down." She sounded just as scared as she'd looked before, as she shifted Owen's limp form.

"Kathryn, let me take Owen. It's got to be hard to carry him in that dress." She nodded and relinquished the dead weight of her sleeping son. "You look beautiful in it, by the way." He complimented as they began to walk.

"Thank you." Her blush in the moon's light was very becoming. "You look pretty good yourself."

"Thank you." He smiled and then noticed her shiver. "Cold?"

"No," she hesitated a moment before continuing. "I'm still off-balance, from Q's visit. It's crazy but he terrifies me."

"It's not crazy, Kathryn. He scares me too. Why do you think I wanted to hold Owen, other than to make your burden lighter?" She gave her trademark half-smile, and he slid an arm companionably around her shoulders and urged her closer. She hesitated for a fraction of a second, but her fears from the past few weeks and the worries that had piled up over the last seven years crashed in on her and she gratefully sidled closer and slipped her own arm around him. After all, she thought, what's so wrong about taking the comfort that you need from the best friend you have in the world. Even if he is attached to another woman that you look on as a daughter. This last thought brought her up short, and she tensed involuntarily. She forced herself to relax, and hoped that he hadn't noticed.

"What?" He noticed anyway. She pulled back then. "What is it, Kathryn?"

"I, nothing, I just remembered that you'll need the cab for later." She tried, but in the end she couldn't resist adding, "Seven will worry if you aren't back soon."

'So that's what that was about.' He smiled softly. He'd hoped that she hadn't noticed his preoccupation with Seven yet. Especially since their unexpected return ended the relationship before it began in earnest. It did, however, explain why she'd avoided him since they'd returned home. "I doubt it. I'm afraid she's not speaking to me, of late. I'm afraid I've hurt her terribly."

"What do you mean? What did you do to her?" Kathryn was almost irate. She was protective of Seven, she'd been doing it longer than she'd had Owen to look after.

"Well, the last couple weeks, I've found myself in doubt of the actions I took and the decisions I made recently on Voyager. With the help of my spirit guide, I've discovered that I am no longer comfortable with those choices." He had selected the words carefully, he knew how protective Kathryn was when Seven was involved.

"But the Admiral said," She trailed off, hope surging once more in her heart.

"Said what, Kathryn?" They'd stopped walking to look at one another.

"She said that you two, you and Seven, you married, and that her death had destroyed you."

"She did?" He said in shock. "No wonder she looked at me the way that she did. I wondered why I saw the regret and longing in her eyes." He was silent and thoughtful for a moment. "It's beside the point now, Kathryn. Seven is beautiful and kind, but she was a distraction. I needed someone to help me take my mind off of you. Seven was a convenient someone. On a future and alternate Voyager it may have led to marriage, but we're home. You once told me you needed more time. I gave you seven years on Voyager and you don't have any excuses left, Kathryn. I just want you to know, I plan on exploiting that advantage." He put his arm back around her shoulders and pulled her close. "So just enjoy this and let me take care of you for once."

Kathryn opened her mouth to protest. Chakotay anticipated it and had prepared for it. As her mouth opened slightly he leaned closer and kissed her softly. "Please, Kathryn, let me take care of you, let me hold you for a little while, we can talk about everything later, but just now, I need to have you and Owen here, where I can hold you and know you're both safe."

She was so touched by the emotion in his voice, and the sincerity in his eyes that she couldn't deny him anything. She just nodded and allowed him to hold her as they began walking again. A short while later, half-way into their walk, she found her left arm around his waist and her right across his chest with her hand resting on Owen's back. She decided not to fight it for now and let her head fall against his chest as well. His satisfied sigh was enough to make her regret her actions concerning him over the last seven years, fully, once more. About a quarter of the way further into their stroll, Owen began to rouse. Kathryn disengaged herself from Chakotay, and waited for her little one to wake fully. When he did Chakotay set the boy on his feet. He ambled over to her and put his arms around her hips as far as they'd go, and burrowed his face into her lower stomach for a moment. He then looked up at her.

"Is it all okay now, Mama?"

Kathryn hugged him back and kissed his upturned forehead. "Yes, little fox, everything is okay now." She smiled with a secret glance to Chakotay.

"Good." He kept his arms around her as they began to walk again, but he settled between the two adults and let them lead the way. Kathryn reached out after a moment and took Chakotay's hand in her own. When he looked at her questioning, she merely smiled at him. He returned it and lifted her hand to his lips momentarily. A tiny shiver ran up both their spines at the contact. The rest of their walk was spent in quiet conversation with Owen and listening to his adventures over his two day stay with Tom and B'elanna.

Chapter 31

When they reached the house Kathryn gave them the grand tour. Owen noted what she told them, but Chakotay took what he'd learned over the years from Kathryn about her mother and father and saw the personal, military yet tender touch of the late Admiral Janeway in the placement of furniture and certain masculine items around most rooms, and the more delicate, love infused touch of her mother in the knick-knacks on shelves. Photos of the family graced the walls and a few dresser-tops. He had known for quite some time that the Janeway's were traditionalists, but seeing the twentieth-century style furniture and the design style of the approach to the house and the large farm-house itself, drove home, with the physical manifestations of her details in stories, the reality that he was standing in Kathryn's childhood home.

The bedroom that she'd stayed in as a child wasn't as easy for him to discern. He'd expected a room that practically screamed out Starfleet prep student, or Admiral in training, but her room had nothing of the expected Starfleet influence in it what-so-ever. Kathryn Janeway's room was like that of any other little girl in any other time. There was a scattering of dolls sitting at a small table or lying in a wooden crib. The bed sheets were a soft, pastel blue, and the curtains a perfect match. The bedspread was a darker blue and trimmed with delicate lace. The bed itself was a big four-poster without a canopy. The wood of the bed looked like Oak, and there was a dresser and desk to match it. The closet door was like any other door in the quaint old-fashioned house, but it was all beautiful.

Chakotay suspected that the room was currently used for Phoebe's girls when they came to stay with Grandma. He guessed the same thing about Phoebe's old room as well. The decor was geared for young girls, not teens that were looking college, in Phoebe's case, and Starfleet Academy, in Kathryn's, in the face. There were, however, still traces of the personal touches that Kathryn and Phoebe had made to their rooms. The more adult decor of Gretchen's room made it simple to spot. Chakotay noted that all the decoration of the house was twentieth-century, nothing but the appliances strayed from the traditional design of the home. He was thoroughly impressed.

The tour ended in the living room that was open to the entry landing of the house. Kathryn told him to make himself comfortable on the long beige and tan striped couch and excused herself and Owen to change into more comfortable clothing. They reappeared a few minutes later. Owen was clad in a set of pajamas and Kathryn wore a dress similar in design to the ones Chakotay had admired on New Earth. "Make yourself comfortable Owen, I have to find it." Kathryn said and disappeared again.

Owen came over and climbed into his lap. Chakotay pulled him part-way up and let him squirm around to get comfortable. "Hey there, little man, feeling better now?"

Owen nodded, "yeah, but I'm kinda tired so I'm gonna sit with you until I fall asleep, if it's okay." The tone in Owen's voce could be described as meek, so Chakotay hugged him close as he smiled.

"Of course it's okay, Owen. Would you like me to tell you a story too?" Chakotay was hopeful.

Owen shook his head in the negative. "No, Mommy and I have been reading a book before bed, well a chapter of a book a night, and we're almost finished." He fidgeted around some more still getting comfortable. Finally, he settled, rested his small head drowsily on the big man's chest, and waited for his mama to begin reading.

It had taken a while to locate the young reader's novel she and Owen had been reading, but when she did, and began reading to him, Owen was out like a light before the first chapter was through. Kathryn marked her place and led the way to the room she and Owen would share. She and Chakotay got Owen pacified and returned downstairs to the couch. He sat first letting her decide whether to put some space between them or remain close. She left some space between them, but it was a scant few inches that would normally be many more. He didn't protest; he knew she wanted to talk. The fact that she did made him nervous. Would she change her mind now that she'd regained her equilibrium? Would she pull away from him again. He promised himself that if she did pull back, he'd push the issue again. Just as he'd done on their walk.

Her opening question didn't allay his fears. "Why now, Chakotay?"

"Why not?" He finally countered.

"I don't know." That was promising. "Why didn't you try harder on Voyager? Why did you wait until tonight to shock me into talking about this with you. I mean, without the veiled implications starting in a beautiful legend." She smiled softly, and Chakotay was heartened by her mention of his declaration of love, so he thought for a while and chose his next words very carefully.

"You weren't ready for this, you'd said as much. Made it clear, when you 'defined parameters,' and then you were learning to be a mother. A wonderful mother, to a very small and unique child, and coping with that yourself, and I had two sets of Janeway emotions to think about, everything that affected you he felt too. I didn't want to do damage to both. Pushing you would have hurt our friendship, and Owen would have had to deal with the strain. I thought about pushing you a little harder before the Fair Haven program was revealed, but by the time I had determined to try, you were with Michael Sullivan, and that proved to me that you still weren't ready to try at a relationship with me. Again, I didn't want to hurt you or sit through the parameters speech again. So I left it alone."

"Why turn to Seven?" She both dreaded and needed an answer here. He knew that this answer was more important than that of the first one, or any other that she might ask.

"Kathryn, I think that was the idea that if I couldn't have you, I wanted the closest I could get. You practically pulled her back to humanity, in a way you were a mother to her, and the similarities between you are amazing. Those similarities made it harder for me to see that it wasn't her I wanted, it was you. It also made it agony to tell her that I'd made a mistake. I'll be angry with myself for a long time for hurting her. But I'd hate myself absolutely for not trying to be with the one I love most in this world."

Kathryn's posture relaxed a bit as if she'd been afraid that he didn't love her. "I hurt you terribly, didn't I?" She looked down at her hands. She was wringing them nervously.

Chakotay reached out and covered them with one of his own hands. "Only when you refused to let me help you, or rejected my comfort when it was apparent that you needed someone. When B'elanna and Harry were missing a few weeks ago and we feared they'd been killed, it hurt that you didn't take the hand I extended to you. We could have helped each other with that. Even Owen was worried about you. He asked me why you were sad, Kathryn. I didn't know what to tell him; I thought I'd lost two of my closest friends, one of those being one of the oldest friends I have left to me. I wanted to help you, I needed comfort myself. I was crushed that we couldn't be there for each other, not because I wanted to be with you romantically. I knew that you needed me to be a friend not a lover. As I said, Seven was a distraction. Something to fill my emptiness until you were ready. I was using Seven. I realized that, I hated myself for it, and I realized that it was no way to gain your trust, so I broke it off."

"You've always had my trust, Chakotay."

"Yes, trust with command of the ship or trust me to be a distanced friend, but never with your heart. You trusted a hologram with your heart, but you hid from me. That hurt, Kathryn." He sounded bitter and hurt even now, and Kathryn reached out to him by entwining their hands.

"Oh, Chakotay, I'm so sorry, I was just confused, alone, I wasn't think-"

"Don't Kathryn. Don't cheapen both our feelings by voicing the eons old excuses. I don't blame you or hate you for being human. I never could. I just wanted you to know how I felt then."

"If it helps any there were so many times on the holodeck that I wished Michael was you, and I damned my stupid sense of duty because it kept me from going to you. I want you to know, that it was the situation we were in. It wasn't you. I was responsible for all of them being there. I could have taken us straight home, but I destroyed the array and I had to put them ahead of my own desires. If we'd been in the alpha quadrant in a similar situation I never would have pushed you away."

"If you'd taken us straight home we'd never have gotten the chance to know each other. I do need to know one thing though. What about New Earth?"

"What about it, Chakotay?" Tears gathered in her eyes as she asked.

"I told you that I loved you that night, the Angry Warrior Legend, I told you I'd wait until you were ready. What were you thinking then, what didn't you say?"

"A thousand things, Chakotay." Her voice trembled as she struggled to hold it together. "I wondered how long I could resist my feelings, my certainty that I loved you. I wondered how it would feel to be loved like you wanted to love me, and I wondered what we'd name our first child and how long it would be until we had a child. You don't know how close I was, Chakotay, to just crumbling into you."

"How close, Kathryn, tell me now. Please." Tears had flooded his eyes when she'd mentioned children. "I was so close, that day, the day that Tuvok contacted us. I had decided that I was tired of fighting it, I wanted to just be held, loved. I had planned on coming to you that night. I don't know that we'd have made love, but I'd have shared your bed, slept in your arms, loved you for the rest of our lives." She turned more fully to him and raised their hands to caress away his tears.

"We were so close Kathryn, why didn't you come to me? We still had that night and the next day. Why didn't you let me love you like you should be loved?"

"Tuvok called. When he said they were back for us and had a cure, I knew that we would have to return to the friendship we'd had. I knew that if I stayed with you that night that I wouldn't be able to go back to being your friend, but it was the only option until I got them home. I knew that it would crush the both of us to share that intimacy and then lose it in the same moment. I couldn't bear to hurt you and I didn't want to feel the pain I'd have felt, so I did nothing, but Gods how I wanted to." Her hands still framed his face, but Chakotay's hands had fallen to his lap. He lifted them again and pulled her over against himself.

"I wanted you there just as bad, Kathryn." A sob escaped her then. A sob of regret? Chakotay chose not to speculate. She let go of his face to encircle his waist and hold him tightly. He held her just as tight as she cried into his chest. "Spirits help me, I still want you there." At this her sobs turned from regret to relief.

"I still want to be there, Chakotay." She whispered between sobs. "I'm so sorry I pushed you away for so long."

"Gods Kathryn," he cupped her face in his hands and pulled her up to look at him, "don't be. You had to be ready for us. I know you Kathryn, better than you think, if we'd tried then we would have ended up hating each other. I'd rather the wait and have a chance to love you here than hating you there. I'd rather we have the chance to try. We are going to try aren't we?" He asked almost tentative.

"Of course, Chakotay, my Angry Warrior." He pulled her into his lap and crushed her to him. They sat like that for a long time, holding one another as tightly as possible as if afraid that one or the other of them would disappear. Silence reigned except the sounds of their hearts and breaths. When finally they pulled apart, Kathryn's face held an expression that Chakotay had learned to fear though he'd rarely seen it. There was a mischievous glint in her eyes and a quirky smile on her lips. "You know, you did something to me that night, and I neglected to return the favor."

He looked puzzled and protested her standing up until a gentle, slender finger rested on his lips to silence him. She slinked around behind him, and her hands on his shoulders, tilted him back toward her. She then began to knead the lingering tension she found in the muscles there. "Oh, Gods." He said softly as his head rolled back to rest against her abdomen.

"And you thought you were the best." She leaned down and forward until her face was even with his ear so that her next, whispered words would be a caress against his skin. " I'll let you in on a little secret, that night, I was so turned on that I thought I'd burst. That's why I left you so suddenly." He moaned helplessly, whether it was from her whispered admission or the magic she worked on his shoulders and neck, neither was sure, and neither did they care.

"If you think I wasn't just as turned on Kathryn you are terribly mistaken. That's why I let you go so easily." When Kathryn stopped they both were sorry, but she still wanted to talk to him, to be close to him. She rounded the couch and settled with her legs across his lap. "Can I ask you a personal question?" She said as his arms came around her again and she rested her head in the crook of his neck taking in his scent with every breath.

"Can I stop you?" He chuckled softly.

"No, so I'll ask anyway. Could you, and would you tell me when you realized that you loved me. Of course, I'll tell you too." He smiled at the soft admission.

"The first week we were out there, when you disappeared. At first I thought I couldn't get them home alone, then I realized that I didn't want to go without you, and when you got back and admitted that you needed to take a little time off to recover, I was hooked. I knew even then that it would be a hard thing for you to admit you needed help. I just didn't know how hard it was. I'd be lying if I said that was the last time I fell for you though. All the times we argued and put distance between ourselves and almost lost our friendship, you'd do something absolutely self-redeeming.

Being able to watch you fall in love with Owen was the most precious gift I've received Kathryn. The night you named him I fell in love again. How you acted when he was so ill in sickbay, it killed me to see you hurt like that, and then you thanked me for being there. It was all I could do to leave that night I wanted to stay and hold you both. Your turn." She was toying with the middle button of his shirt as she listened to him.

"I think it was the day of the plasma storm on New Earth, that's when I realized what it was that I was feeling for you was love. We had just argued about my research and there you were trying to help me salvage it, after you'd stopped me from doing something stupid, like going out in the middle of a plasma storm to save the equipment. I knew then that you'd never hurt me, unless it was for my own good. I fell in love with you, I thought this one through for a long time, the first time we had an argument over ship's business after you became my first officer. When you pushed for B'elanna to be head engineer. I admired your vehement defense of your people, and knowing that my people were now going to be yours I loved you for the fact that you'd defend them and me, as well, with the same intensity."

He smiled and kissed her temple softly. She responded by slipping a bit closer and kissing the side of his neck. It was her gesture that made his mind up. He became serious and looked down at her tenderly, but resolute. "Kathyrn, as much as we've admitted here and as much as I'd love to take you and devour you right now, and make you a part of me physically, I really do think that the slow and easy approach is the best for us. I don't want to chance losing you and Owen. Not because we sped up when we needed to slow down. We have time, and I am satisfied being a close friend to you, now there's the potential for more. Let's keep it that way until we're settled in and sure of what we really want."

Her face had fallen at his words. He was reflexively giving her an out. She realized again how much she'd hurt him. "Chakotay don't. I'm sure, I have been sure it would happen, I just didn't think I had a chance anymore after the Admiral told me about you and Seven. I love you, even further to your advantage, Owen loves you. He wouldn't have anything to do with Michael. I asked him why he didn't like Michael once, he told me he didn't need Michael because he had you."

"I have a confession about that night you tried to introduce them. Now, I really was there to meet B'ela, Tom and Harry, but when I realized what you were attempting with Owen, I sabotaged the evening. I didn't want them to have a chance to get to know each other. I like being his father figure. I'd do anything for him. Besides it let me get closer to you."

"I sort of thought that might have happened. You needn't have worried about it though Owen refused to have anything to do with him. I tried only once more to get him to go with me. He ignored Michael the whole time and after that refused to go, period. I lost interest after that too." Chakotay was pensive for a moment debating on asking his next question.

"Kathryn, did you really wonder about having a child with me?"

"Yes I did." She answered with no hesitation. "I've wanted children all my life, and I knew that you would be the perfect father because I loved you. But, I knew that on New Earth it was just a matter of when I let myself go to you. After that it would have been a matter of time. I dreamed about children with you, Chakotay. I saw dark haired and blue-eyed boys playing tag in that meadow we found, and a little girl in a home made dress picking the wild flowers with you. I admit they looked more like you than me, besides the eyes. Their skin was a softer bronze than yours but still much darker than mine could be. I saw myself with an infant watching you all. I didn't want to wake up." She sighed and settled in closer to him.

"Four? You dreamed of having four?" He sounded astonished.

"Yes, why, you want more?" She suggested playfully.

"Whatever you want. Even though I think we're getting ahead of ourselves."

"I'd say it's still just a matter of time, my Angry Warrior. It was just a dream, not a premonition, but I love you, and I still would love to have your children. I'd be honored." She slid her legs back to herself. Despite his wish to slow them down they were getting more intense and she needed to put some distance between them if they were going to continue as friends and not lovers. He'd proven his love for seven years. It was her turn to prove herself to him.

"I think we should move to safer topics than this. We can't keep things calm if we are talking about our most secret and intense desires, now can we?"

"Nope you're right, so what's a safe topic?" She raised an eyebrow in challenge.

"How about what you and Owen have been up to while avoiding me." He suggested slyly.

"Okay, I was in the middle of being debriefed, like you, fighting for my son's existence, dodging the press, and I checked in on an old friend and decided she was better off with the family that she belongs to now."

"Molly?" Her head shot up in shock.

"Yes, I didn't think you'd remember." She was definitely surprised.

"I remember everything you ever told me about your family, every time you let me see a little piece of Kathryn with out the captain hanging around hiding behind all that protocol."

She smiled ruefully. "I'm sorry." He knew she needed to do something to make up for hurting him, and took it for what it was, another of the bricks in the wall between them crumbling to dust. "Anyway, Molly is still with Mark and his wife and their two beautiful children. I thought it best if she stayed with them. The children obviously loved her and Molly barely remembered me. I can always get another dog."

"How was that?" She gave him a look. "Your meeting with Mark and his wife."

"Not as bad as I thought it might be. The friendship is still there between us, and his wife is a very sweet woman. Perfect for him really. It was awkward at first, but we got along well."

"And Owen, did you have him with you?" Chakotay stroked a strand of her hair behind her ear.

"Yes, actually. He had a great time playing with Mark's children. He didn't understand the connection between Mark and myself. He actually asked if Mark had been on Voyager before he was. I think I'm going to have a hard time integrating him into normal societal situations. He's been on Voyager his whole life as far as he knows and he is too young, still to understand that it's not the same military structure everywhere."

"He'll get it eventually. What did Mark think of him?"

"He was astonished, and for a moment he thought Owen was his son, I set him straight. He doesn't know the whole story but knowing that Owen was mine alone was enough for him."

"What else have you been up to?"

"Nothing much. I spent most of the time defending his right to exist, and then I came here and he stayed with Tom and B'elanna. I'm going to start looking for an apartment next week. The leave and back pay from Starfleet will last a while before I need to decide whether to go back out on a ship or stay and research the phenomena that we discovered and devote my free time to Owen. Which I'd do anyway. They want me to teach at the academy too."

"I've had a few offers like that myself, I decided not to decide at the moment. I want a little time to relax first."

"How long do you think this vacation will last, Chakotay?"

"Two weeks, tops, before we go stir crazy. We're so used to working now that we won't be comfortable being idle for too long."

"I figured about that myself." They laughed easily, but were interrupted by panicked footsteps on the stairs behind them.

"Mommy?!" Owen sounded terrified.

"What is it my Owen?" She was around the couch and catching him as he launched himself at her. "Why are you so scared, baby?"

He was shivering against her. "I had a bad dream, and you weren't there."

"It's okay now, little fox. It's over, and I'm right here." She returned to the couch with him. "Would you like to tell me about it?"

He shook his head no. "It was bad Mama." Chakotay scooted over toward them and put a hand on Owen's clammy back, clearly the boy had been sweating in his sleep.

"Chakotay's here too, Owen. You're safe, tell me about it. It will help you feel better."

"Okay, Mama. I was at home still and there was a alert, but when I went to go to Neelix like I'm supposed to there was no one there, not even Naomi. So, I went to the bridge, even though I'm not supposed to, I was scared and I couldn't find anyone."

The fact that he'd done something in the dream, that he knew he wasn't supposed to was upsetting him as well as the dream itself and she felt bad for him. "It's okay, that was the right thing to do."

"When I got on the bridge you were both there, and Tuvok and Tom and B'elanna and Harry too. But then Tuvok disappeared, and then Harry and then Tom and B'elanna, then Chakotay, and then you Mama. I got really scared then 'cause I was all alone, but then Voyager went away too, and I was in space and I didn't have a suit on and I couldn't breathe 'cause there's no air in space. It was dark there too, 'cause the stars were gone. Then I woke up and I was still scared and I didn't know where I was and you weren't' there, and I came looking for you."

"I'm so sorry, my Owen, but it's okay now. I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere. I'm not letting go of you either." He burrowed closer against her trying to control the shivers.

"Okay."

"You try to go back to sleep. I've got you." She kissed the top of his head. He nodded and his body began to relax. "I love you, my little fox."

"Love you too, Mommy. I'm okay now." He assured her. Kathryn glanced up at Chakotay and lights on the driveway caught her eye.

"It must be late, your Grandma and Aunt Phoebe are here." She indicated the car now pulling up to the house. "Let's go meet them shall we?"

Owen nodded and stood up slipping off her lap. She and Chakotay stood as well. "I should really get going, Kathryn." Chakotay stated as they did.

"NO! Chakotay I don't want you to go. Please stay." He latched onto a leg.

"It's time for you and your mom to get some sleep, and me too."

"But I don't want you to go away." Chakotay realized that his dream was still fresh in his mind. "You won't ever come back."

"Of course I'll come back Owen, but I can't stay here now." Chakotay was bent over trying to pry Owen's arms from his leg with Kathryn's help.

A new voice broke in on them. "I don't mind if you want. I have a spare guest room sitting unused, two if you count Phoebe's old room. She went home to Benjamin and the girls again." Gretchen stood in the doorway watching them. She was still curious about this man.

"Please stay, Chakotay, please." Owen asked looking up at him.

"What if he stay's long enough for me to shower and change and you to fall asleep again? Would that be okay with you?" Kathryn asked him.

"Okay." He seemed placated for the moment.

"Let's get you upstairs then." Chakotay lifted him and followed Kathryn up the stairs and into the room. Gretchen tagged along behind. They entered the silent, dimly lit room and Chakotay crossed to the bed. Kathryn gathered her clothes while they got comfortable. When she had everything she leaned across Chakotay to give Owen another kiss. "Sleep good, I'll be back in a little bit. As for you, I'll call your cab after I shower."

"Okay. We'll be here, you're going to miss a wonderful legend though."

"I have a sneaking suspicion that I've heard it." She shared a secret smile with him, and he knew he'd been found out. Gretchen was still waiting in the door as Kathryn walked out.

"Sleep tight Owen." She said to the apple of her daughter's eye.

"I will, good night." He replied. The two women could hear Chakotay's legend begin as the door shut softly.

"Has Owen been up this whole time, Kath, it's one in the morning."

"No, he's been asleep for a good while now. He had a nightmare shortly before you drove up, we were trying to get him back to sleep."

"That reminds me, Tom wanted me to pass along to you that they'd had problems with that. He said that Owen was talking about the ship disappearing, and that it was all he could do to get him back to sleep afterward."

"That's it then. I hoped tonight was a fluke and that we wouldn't have a problem with this. If wishes were horses, I guess." She shook her head.

"He's homesick for Voyager then."

"I think so, yes, I'm sure of it."

"Give him time, sweetheart, he's got a lot of adjusting to do."

"I know, Mom, we all do, and I fear that starting him in school will only make things worse."

"Then don't start him in school, dear. What did you do on Voyager?"

"Some of the crew members donated off time to teach both Owen and Naomi."

"Well, then talk to them and continue that, until his transition is finished. Talk to Naomi's parents as well, Kath, she's probably having the same problems as Owen is."

"Good idea, I'll look into it, thank you. I should get busy, and shower and call Chakotay's cab. Sleep well, Mom." She hugged and kissed her mother, and it was returned.

"I will, you sleep well, yourself. Be patient with my grandson, don't be too hard on him."

"Always and never, Mom." The two embraced again and went their separate ways. Kathryn to shower and call the cab and Gretchen to change and get in bed. When Kathryn returned to the room it was silent and still.

The scene she beheld was a close likeness of one about a year earlier. The first had been under the stars and the moon of Earth in the holodeck. This scene was in her old bedroom on her home planet. Chakotay was half-sitting propped up by the headboard, on the bed. He was fast asleep. Owen was snuggled next to him his head on Chakotay's ribs and an arm draped across his stomach. That night last year she'd reflexively suppressed the feelings that scene had conjured. She started to again and remembered their earlier conversation. She took a moment to remember they were home, to remember that there was no need to quell the feelings now.

Smiling softly she walked over to Chakotay's side and sat on the edge of the bed Chakotay stirred only to settle farther down onto the bed. Her smile grew and she placed a hand in the center of his tuxedo-shirted chest. "Chakotay I'm back." He mumbled unintelligibly and soothed Owen's back with the hand placed snugly on her little fox's back, just as his hand had rested on the boy's chest a year ago, steadying and protecting him. She shook her head in affection and tried again. She kissed his forehead this time. He stirred this time enough to figure out who was there before he dozed off again. Kathryn threw caution to the wind and kissed him full on the mouth. Chakotay came from a peaceful sleep to fully awake when her lips touched his, and he responded to her a microt later. His arm came up and encircled her waist he tightened his grip pulling her closer, but keeping the kiss light. He didn't intensify the connection just enjoyed it. Even though it was a light kiss it was the most wonderful feeling he'd had in a long time.

When she would have taken them further he pulled back. "What a way to wake up." He murmured softly.

"I wanted to do that last year when I found the two of you asleep on that hill in Fair Haven. Besides, everything else I tried didn't work."

She smiled not moving from her position against his side opposite her son. "I'm glad you finally did it."

"Me too, I've called your cab, the driver promised not to honk. We'll need to be outside to meet him, he should be here soon."

"Okay, just let me extricate myself from Owen." As soon as he moved though, Owen began to whimper and tightened his grip on Chakotay.

"No," came the half-asleep whine. "Don't leave."

"Shh, it's okay, little man. I'll see you tomorrow or the day after."

"Wanna see you now."

"You're sleeping Owen. Your Mother's here. I'll see you soon."

"Uhnn, no." Kathryn finally intervened once more.

"Chakotay, why not carry him outside and I'll bring him back in when your cab arrives. We'll sit with you until then."

Chakotay nodded and lifted Owen as he finished standing. Kathryn grabbed Owen's little blanket just in case there was a wind blowing, and then they descended the stairs to settle on the porch swing. The night was mild and Kathryn decided that Owen wouldn't need the blanket after all. When the cab pulled into the drive Owen was in a deep enough sleep that the transfer from Chakotay to Kathryn went off without a hitch. "Come for dinner tomorrow night, Chakotay." Kathryn said as she walked him to the steps. "Come a little early and we'll talk and I'll show you some more of my home. I'm sure Mom would like to see you again too, she's got to be eaten up with curiosity by now."

"I'll be here." He turned to go. Her hand on his arm was all it took to bring him back around and he met and returned her kiss. "See you tomorrow afternoon."

"We'll be waiting, and don't worry, I'm not cooking." She hesitated a moment. "If you feel like it bring a bag and stay tomorrow night, stay the weekend. It might be fun."

He'd laughed softly at her reference to their shared joke and then become serious at her suggestion that he stay with them. "I'll have to think about that last. See you tomorrow." He turned and made his way to the cab. She stood watching him until the cab was on it's way then returned inside to the top of the stairs and into her bedroom. She got herself and Owen settled and tried to sleep. Eventually, after listening to his quiet breathing and after he'd gravitated as close as his little body would get to her protection and warmth, she finally drifted off.

Chapter 32

The next morning dawned softly and a blanket of fine mist hung heavily over the Indiana fields, in the pre-dawn light. That light was enough to wake Owen Janeway who was accustomed to the soft starlight drifting past the view ports, and his stretching against her was what woke Kathryn from a particularly pleasant dream about Chakotay. "Good morning, little fox. How did you sleep?"

His voice was dulled by sleep when he answered. "Morning, I slept good." He snuggled back closer to her side. "Do we hafta get up now, Mama?"

"No we can sleep a little longer than usual." She snuggled him back relishing this quiet time with her son.

"I guess you don't have to go on duty here, huh?"

"No I don't, since we aren't on Voyager any more. It's kind of like a very long shore leave."

"How long is it? I want to know when it'll be over." He rolled over to face her looking inquisitive.

"I don't know." She looked seriously down at him, and decided to jump in with both feet. "What would you think about not going back out on a ship? What if we stayed here on Earth and I was more available to you?"

"But you are available, Mommy. I miss Voyager. I miss my home, 'cause it's too quiet here."

Her brows knitted together in consternation. "What do you mean 'too quiet'?"

He propped himself up on an elbow. "I can't hear the engines, Mama, and it's too still. My bed used to move a little bit with the engines, and now it doesn't and I can't sleep good."

"It's just going to take some getting used to, that's all, my little fox." Kathryn tenderly smoothed a locke of hair off of Owen's forehead. "For me too, but I think that it would be good for both of us to stay on Earth for a while."

He was a little distraught as he cried out, "Mommy, I was supposed to go on the Holodeck with Tuvok for class soon to learn about his home world. I wanna go home. It's too bright here."

"Shhh, sweetheart, your grandma will think something is wrong and come charging in here. You really do miss them all don't you." He nodded softly at her. "I can agree that it's too bright. I forgot to close the shutters last night when I came to bed, but I'll bet that if we pulled the covers up over our heads it would be dark enough to sleep a little bit longer. What do you say?" She hoped that seeing Chakotay again today would help Owen feel better about his new home.

"Let's try it." Owen sat up and grabbed the blanket and pulled it up from where it had slipped down with their movement. Kathryn pulled him back down to cuddle and helped him get the covers over her head too. "Hey, that is better, Mama." His statement was punctuated by a yawn as he buried his face into the softness of her abdomen.

"It must be, you're already falling asleep on me."

"Sorry, I'm still a little bit tired." His voice was fading with each word and by the end of the sentence he was fast asleep.

"That's the way it goes when you have nightmares, my love. Don't worry, I've got you." She whispered this softly to him and kissed the top of his head before snuggling down with him into a little extra sleep for herself. The next time Kathryn awoke the sun had long since chased all the lingering blanket of mist off the ground. Kathryn woke to a soft knock at the door. "Come in, Mom." Kathryn uncurled from around her son, pulled the blanket from her head and Owen's, and lie back flat in order to stretch a little.

Owen sighed softly in his sleep and rolled over onto his stomach his head pillowed on her ribs and an arm across her stomach. "That's just precious." Her mother's soft voice came from the door. She stood watching her daughter and grandson.

"He's perfect, Mom." Kathryn hugged her son softly overwhelmed with love and contentment.

"It's a beautiful feeling to have a child, isn't it?"

"Yes, I have loved every moment of the last three years. Even the worries. I love being a mom."

"I know exactly what you mean." Kathryn actually believed her. It was as though they'd gained a whole new understanding of each other, and all because Owen had made her a mother giving them a common frame of reference.

"Anyway, it's about time you two got out of bed. Phoebe and the girls should be here before too long. Ben is going to come for dinner later, he had a last minute problem at work and decided to take the morning to fix it."

At the mention of dinner Kathryn's memory flared. "Oh, speaking of dinner, I almost forgot to tell you I invited Chakotay to join us at dinner tonight. I thought it would be good for Owen."

"He seems a very nice man, dear." 'So,' thought Kathryn, 'we're going with the innocent routine this time.'

"Yes he definitely is. Sorry I didn't introduce you more formally last night."

"That's okay, I met him at the party. Kathryn," she hesitated, her daughter had always been private about her relationships. "I hesitate to ask, and you certainly have a right not to answer, but-"

"Yes, Mom, there is something there between us, more than just a friendship. Just what I don't quite know yet. We're the best of friends and we love each other, but so much has happened between the two of us in the last seven years that, I think, we're afraid to do anything that might destroy this bond we seem to share."

"But do you love each other?" Kathryn thought back over the years all the emotions suppressed and then there was New Earth, she nodded softly as she twisted her fingers around a lock of Owen's red-brown hair. "Then listen to your heart, not your head. What does your heart tell you?"

"To grab on and not let go for as long as we live, but there's so much there that we still need to work through. I hurt him terribly and he needs time for me to prove that I won't push him away again."

"Then talk to each other, dear, the most important thing between you is the ability to tell each other everything. You'll help each other along if you talk about your worries whether they have to do with something between the two of you or an outside problem. You'll grow together that way, and not apart like so many do. Your father and I learned that fact early on in our life and that is what helped us through the tough times."

"We've already been through some of the toughest, and we came out of it better friends. It was even stronger when we disagreed on the actions taken. He is not afraid to tell me when he thinks I'm wrong. He can be the most frustrating man in the world sometimes, but he's also the most wonderful. He is charmed when it comes to dealing with Owen. When I can't get him settled Chakotay can. He's great with him, he always has been, and I think I sound as hopelessly in love as I feel. But I love him, Mom, I've been sure of that for a very long time." How she'd gotten on this conversational track she wasn't sure, but it felt good to have her mother to bounce her thoughts off of.

"Then you're on the right track already. Like I said, just follow your heart." She noticed Owen's breathing changing as he began to stir. Both fell silent in favor of watching him wake. Gretchen, more accurately, watched her daughter more closely than she did her grandson. Kathryn's face was the epitome of motherhood. Gretchen was delighted to see the content smile on her daughter's face as the small replica stretched his body to it's fullest length beside her and then yawned and rubbed his eyes before opening them.

Kathryn absolutely glowed as her son's bright blue eyes opened and fell on her watching him. The drowsy smile he flashed brought a loving twinkle to her eye. "G'mornin' Mama. Is it time to get up this time?" He rolled around trying to get comfortable.

"Yes it is, little fox, what would you like to eat this morning?" Owen shrugged with his back still turned to her, then rolled over closer to where she lie in the middle of the bed. His stretching had inched him over to the edge of the full-size bed.

"I'm not really hungry, Mama. What are we gonna do today?" He asked her and then noticed Gretchen who was now sitting on the other side of his mama at the foot of the bed. "Good morning, Grandma." Kathryn's heart swelled nearly to bursting to hear Owen address her mother as Grandmother without prompting from her. She was as overwhelmed by this as she had been the first time he'd called her Mama. "So what are we gonna do, Mommy?" Owen's insistent voice brought her back to reality.

"What ever we wish, Owen. At least until your aunt and cousins get here. Chakotay agreed to visit again today too."

Owen's smile was immediate and resplendent with joy. "What are we still in bed for then? Let's get up and call him, come on Mama." He stood up in the bed took her hand and pulled on her trying to get her up. She pulled back and he lost his balance toppling over on top of her. "Whoa!"

While he was still unbalanced she attacked his ribs tickling with a vengeance. Finding his most ticklish spots hadn't been a challenge at all. They were in the exact same places as her own. Finally, when he was laughing so hard that tears rolled down his cheeks, and he could no longer protest, she let up on him. "That was a dirty trick, Mommy."

"Yes, it was, but now we can get up." She kissed his forehead and let him go. "You go and change into your clothes, I'll wait until you're done. Besides, I-"

"You need coffee." Owen beat her to it, and shook his head.

"Right." She reminded herself once again never to allow him to taste the stuff. He'd be just as addicted as she was. "Then we'll find something light to eat before everyone arrives."

"Okay." The boisterous child stood up in the bed again and bounced his way down to the end of it like one would on a trampoline. He bounced off the end and there was a muffled thud as his sock-feet hit the rug at the foot of the bed. He grabbed the clothes that his mother had set out the night before and disappeared down the hall into the bathroom. Kathryn shook her head, she'd have to try that lecture again. She'd had to sit him down a few weeks ago for the same behavior on Voyager. It appeared it was time for another mother-to-son talk.

Kathryn noticed her mother's rueful smile and the shaking of her head at his antics. "What Mom?"

"He's as bad as you were. Always full of energy and ready to discover something new. How many times have you talked to him about running in the house so far, not as many as I have with you." Gretchen kissed her daughter just as Kathryn had kissed her son. "Now get yourself out of that bed. I've made your breakfast."

"I'll be down in a moment."

Chapter 33

Kathryn was dressed and in the process of making the bed when Owen came charging back into the room. His now bare feet slapping the hard wood of the floor in the hall way. "Owen, no running in the house. That is for outside."

"Okay, Mommy," his pace slowed, "where should I put my dirty clothes?"

"There in the hamper by that door. They'll get cleaned later." She pointed out a wicker basket by the door. He deposited his pajamas and socks then came back to help her make the bed. A few minutes later they were down in the kitchen eating a light breakfast at the table there. After they were done Kathryn took Owen on a walk to show him around the home she'd grown up in.

Directly behind the house was a thicket of brush and trees. A small stream bubbled and gurgled happily within. Most all other directions that one looked though there were endless fields of emerald grains. The plants were still young and not so very tall. The area appeared as a large sea of green waves in the breeze. Nearer to the house was a flower and vegetable garden. It held almost every flower that one could wish for. After letting his eyes wander from the dull flowers Owen spotted a line of tiny insects. "Mommy, look!" She turned from her mother's flowers and her discussion to see what had him so excited. "What are those?" He'd been in wide-eyed wonder all morning now his curiosity propelled him closer to the scurrying bugs.

"Those are ants, Owen. Don't touch them they leave a nasty sting."

"I won't." He watched them fascinated.

"They'll have a bed nearby." Gretchen informed.

"Where, can I see it? It must be tiny. Are there blankets on it like I have on my bed."

"No, sweetheart, ants don't have beds like that. An ant bed is a mound of dirt. We call that an ant bed. Let's follow their trail and find it. So you can see for yourself." Owen took her hand and they traced the ant's path about one hundred yards from the edge of the garden. It was indeed a small hump of dirt that the line was disappearing into.

"They live in there?"

"Yes, see the hole in the center." He nodded still eyeing the mound.

"It goes through the bed under the ground and they have tiny tunnels and rooms."

"Wow!" Owen let go of her hand to pick up a twig and poke at the dirt. Ants started pouring from the holes he made.

"Owen don't stir them up." Kathryn said from behind them. "How would you like it if someone put holes in your home."

"Well a lot of people tried and I didn't like it at all. Sorry, Mama."

"Oh let him poke around a bit. He can't hurt anything. How's he going to learn about them if he can't explore a little. The holes he made will be fixed in no time."

"He has been taught that it's okay to observe but not interfere."

"Kathryn Elizabeth, you and your sister poked and trampled more ant beds than could be counted." Their debate went on even though Owen had tossed the twig away and lost interest in the ants. He'd returned to Kathryn's side, and listened as the discussion moved back to the flowers he'd gotten bored with earlier. His eyes again wandered and he spotted a trail on the road.

"Mommy," He tugged lightly on her dress to get her attention.

"What is it Owen?"

"Somebody is coming on the road." He pointed back to the dust trail and the women turned to look.

"Well, let's go see who it is." Gretchen headed off to see which of her guests had arrived. Leaving Kathryn and Owen to trail behind her. As the three of them rounded the front corner of the house Chakotay was closing the driver side door.

"Chakotay!" Owen called out overjoyed to see the dark-skinned man. He let go of his mother's hand and took off at a run. Chakotay smiled softly at Kathryn and then knelt as Owen reached him.

"Good morning, little man, I told you I'd see you again, didn't I?"

Owen nodded as Chakotay lifted him off the ground. "Yeah, and guess what I saw today?"

"I haven't the slightest idea Owen, what did you see?" Chakotay was overjoyed with Owen's excitement.

"Ants, Mama said that they sting so I didn't touch 'em, but we followed them all the way to their nest. Grandma calls it a bed, and they live under the ground in tunnels!" The boy was bubbling with excitement.

Gretchen doubted it was from the discovery of the ants though, as she and Kathryn reached them. "Hello, nice to see you again so soon, Mr. ah-"

"Just Chakotay, Ma'am. I'm glad I finally get to meet you properly. The introductions last night were a little clipped off."

"Yes they were, call me Gretchen please, none of this ma'am or Mrs. Janeway. We're relaxing here. You can't relax and be proper at the same time."

"Thank you, I hope you don't mind that I'm a little early."

"Oh, no, you're right on time. I was getting ready to go and start lunch."

"Look Mommy, another car is coming." Kathryn peeled her eyes from Chakotay and Owen to glance at the road. "That'll be Phoebe and the girls. You said that Benjamin was going to be late didn't you, Mom."

"Yes, unless he fixed the problem he was having at work early. He's normally off on weekends." Gretchen watched her daughter and her friend closely noting how formal they were trying to be with each other, and how hard it was for them. She began to suspect that she was the cause of the shyness. "I'd better get in there and start lunch. Those girls will most likely be howling for food when they get here. That whole bunch is probably hungry. Unlike some I know most people get up before mid-morning." She directed a look of mock-reproach toward her elder daughter.

Chakotay chuckled secretively. He'd noticed on New Earth that Kathryn wasn't a morning person. He suspected that the only reason she did it on the ship was because she had no other choice. "The best way to get her out of bed early is a strong cup of coffee under her nose." He informed Gretchen all the while grinning like the proverbial Cheshire cat. Kathryn reached out and lightly slapped Chakotay's arm for the comment. "Or leave it to Owen. He usually has me out of bed early, but it was his idea to sleep in today so I decided to indulge a little."

Gretchen wondered at the two of them. She'd have to get the whole story from Kathryn one day, she resolved, as she entered the house leaving them to themselves for a bit. "Aren't you going to say hello, Kathryn?" Chakotay asked softly. As soon as the door shut behind her mother Kathryn was across the two steps between them and embracing Chakotay as best she could with Owen in the way.

"How was the drive? I hope you didn't have any problems finding us again."

"No problems at all. I take it there were no more incidents after I left." She knew he meant Owen.

"No we slept well. How about you?"

"Fine, I'll admit to sleeping in a little myself."

"And you gave me trouble for it." She poked him in the ribs, and he retaliated with a brief but stirring kiss.

_**Oh now they get together. After I did all that hard work and nothing accomplished my goal for this experiment. I love humans, but they can be so annoying sometimes.**_

"Yuck." This came from Owen who was sandwiched between them. The tone was playful though. The adults released each other and she kissed Owen for his comment. "Yuck." He wiped his cheek more fervently than was necessary still playing with her.

"Oh really." She again retaliated his actions by taking him from Chakotay's arms and kissing his face all over.

"Okay, okay, kisses aren't yucky. But why did you kiss Chakotay?"

She smiled at both of them before answering him honestly. "Because I love him."

"Oh, okay. Does that mean I have to kiss him too?" He looked a little apprehensive.

"No, it doesn't. A hug works just a good as a kiss."

"Oh good. Can I go inside now?" He wriggled until she put him down and then tromped up the steps and into the house.

"Take your shoes off at the door, baby." She called after him, barely catching the 'okay Mommy,' he called back to her.

"Does anything bother that kid?" Chakotay asked watching her reaction.

"No, but I think that his reaction to us was more to do with his adoration of you. He loves you so why shouldn't I." She stepped closer again and encircled his waist with her arms. He held her back a little to look into her eyes.

"That must be it then."

"Would you rather he hated you?" She asked as she rested against him.

"Most definitely not, but it wouldn't stop me from loving you if he did." His arms had circled her back now, and she noted how right it felt.

Lowering her voice she asked, "are you staying tonight?"

"I came prepared to. I think I'll wait to decide until we see how the day goes." Kissing her hairline he released her.

"I can live with that." She held on a second longer and let go except for the hand she captured. "Let's go sit on the porch, hmm?" She pulled him up the steps and over to a large swing at the open end of the porch. They sat together, Kathryn's head on his shoulder and his left arm around her for a few short minutes until Phoebe's vehicle pulled in beside Chakotay's and came to a stop. Phoebe got out and waved at them where they were still sitting together, before disappearing back into the back seat to retrieve her youngest daughter, Elizabeth, who was named after her Aunt Kathryn. Phoebe's husband had apparently finished what he needed to do, and was helping Ally, the six-year-old out of her restraints, and they made their way to the porch. Kathryn stood only when they reached the porch and then only long enough to hug her sister and family. She didn't know Ben well, but the time she had spent with him earlier that week had piqued her curiosity and she found she did want to like him. He was good for Phoebe. The little girls were next. Ally was eager for the hugs from her Aunt Kathryn, whom she'd been told about her whole life. Lissy, was another matter, at three, she was shy and Kathryn understood her shyness with this new person. Owen still acted that way some and he was about to turn five.

After her greetings she introduced Chakotay. Phoebe, like their mother, was curious about this man in Kathryn and Owen's lives. Owen, himself popped up a few seconds later and was introduced to his cousins and uncle. He latched onto Chakotay's leg further raising his Aunt's suspicions. They retired inside at Gretchen's call and took a little time to get comfortable in the house.

Chapter 34

_**Well, well finally the success that I didn't achieve while they were on Voyager. It's about time those two got together.**_

After lunch concluded Ally and Owen went off to play letting Lissy tag along, they didn't go far. The adults sat on the porch in the shade talking and getting to know each other. Around mid-afternoon, the children returned, Lissy was tired and they all were thirsty and needed a snack and a break. Owen sat between his Mama and Chakotay, who'd re-appropriated the swing after lunch. The older two were off again shortly wanting to wander further away since the little one had fallen asleep. Phoebe settled her small daughter in her mother's room and conned Kathryn into taking a walk like they had as kids. She was reluctant to leave Chakotay alone, but he assured her that he'd be okay and sent her with her sister.

Phoebe waited until they were some distance from the house before asking candidly about Chakotay. "We love each other, but I've defined so many parameters that I think we're having problems getting around them all. We're still very formal in front of outside parties. The only person that has ever seen us informal is Owen. He should be privy to what happens in my life when it affects him and everything I do affects Owen. On Voyager, we as in us, was not an option. Not for lack of want, but out of necessity, and it was all me. I couldn't let him in. I came so close so many times and I always stopped myself. Maybe it's just me, I'm having trouble taking the next step because I feel guilty for everything since New Earth."

"Wait," Phoebe stopped her, "what's New Earth, Kath?"

Kathryn sighed a sigh that seemed soul deep. "New Earth is the planet that Chakotay and I were stranded on for four months late in the second year of our journey home. We thought that our journey had ended with that planet." She went on to tell her what had happened. Finding it easier to talk to Phoebe than she remembered, but knowing that she needed her sister to talk to. Phoebe had always been the one to look out for her when she was on a collision course.

"Oh, Kath, I'm so sorry. That must have been horrible to be on the verge of pledging your life to him and then have it all taken away."

"It was, but it got easier, for both of us, I think."

"You have to tell him, and make him understand."

"I have, we talked about it last night, but we haven't had the chance to be alone again since then. He told me to think about what I want, and I already know. I don't want to wait any longer. I want him now, and I want to love him and be loved by him like I should have been for the last seven years. I want to share my and Owen's life with him. I want more children, his children and I want to be deliriously happy for once in my life."

"Then tell him that. Let's go back to the house and you take that handsome first officer of yours for a walk. Tell him now."

They were turned around and on their way back to the house before Kathryn knew what had happened. But by the time that they reached the porch, Kathryn had forgotten all about taking Chakotay for a private walk. There was a nagging sensation that was disturbingly familiar, yet she couldn't place it. As soon as she saw Chakotay the memory of this feeling came flooding back to her. "Where's Owen!?" The urgency in her voice silenced the conversation and wiped the anticipation off of her sister's face. She reached to tap the Comm badge that wasn't there. "Damn it all." She realized that even if she'd had her badge Owen's badge had been deactivated.

"He and Ally are still out playing." Gretchen answered.

One look at her face was all that Chakotay needed and he knew she was serious. He was down the stairs and holding her upper arms before he realized what he'd done. He looked straight into her eyes, "What is it, Kathryn? I know this look, and the last time I saw it was that day that Neelix's food went-"

"I know, something's wrong." She whispered to him as she tried to grasp onto the feeling as it repeatedly slipped through her mental fingers.

"Where were they going to play? Do you know?" Chakotay asked giving Kathryn time to try and figure it out.

"Ally wanted to show Owen the big tree, you know it Kath, it was too tall for the tree house we wanted to build." Kathryn had already set off for the landmark at her Captain's pace. Chakotay was a half-step behind. They'd just entered the thicket when a sense of wrongness flowed over her. "Wait." Then Q's light but insistent voice entered her mind.

"Kathy, you'd better run, I can't get there at the moment." Then an image of Owen dangling below the old tree house from a limb that looked too big for him to really grasp.

"Oh Gods, come on!" She pushed back past the others heading in the opposite direction.

"What?" Chakotay shouted trying to catch up to her as she broke into a full out run.

"He's going to fall!" She didn't need to say more as she went into full mommy-mode trying to get to her baby in time. Chakotay, she knew, was hot on her heels, catching the branches she left swinging behind her. Phoebe too had broken into a frantic dash worried about the children.

Gretchen was just as worried, but remembered that Lissy was still asleep at the house and turned back shouting out to Ben what she was doing. He then followed the other parents. Kathryn and Chakotay arrived at the dilapidated tree house just in time to see the rung that Owen was perched on, just three rungs from the top of the ladder, crumble in Owen's hands as his left foot slipped. Things slowed down for Kathryn as she watched Owen slide on his belly for about four feet down the trunk of the tree that the ladder was nailed to, before he hit the first limb that caught him under his right arm perfectly in the juncture where shoulder and arm connected. His shrill scream hid the pop his shoulder made as it separated. Despite the pain he was surely feeling, Kathryn saw him hook his left arm over the limb as well. Trying desperately to stop his fall. He slipped a little more putting enough pressure on his arm to make him cry out. "Ally, go get my mommy!" The agony and terror was all too apparent in his voice, as he sobbed the command. "Chakotay!" Kathryn ran faster if it were possible. Still at her agonized call, he pulled out ahead of her and started to climb the tree instructing her to stay on the ground, in case Owen fell again.

The little boy was unaware of them in his agony as he slipped little by little until his arms had rotated above his head and he was dangling below the limb. "Hold on, My Owen, just a little longer." Kathryn repeated like it was a mantra. Phoebe came to her side with Ally in her arms. Kathryn was thankful that the little girl was unhurt, but unable to say so being terrified for her son.

Chapter 35

Chakotay made his way, as swiftly as caution and the falling darkness would allow, up the branches of the tree. He ignored the rotten ladder. As he drew even, standing on a limb below and behind Owen, the boy finally lost the precarious grip. Thankfully, Chakotay had presence of mind to grab him around the middle and pulled him back against himself. Owen squealed as the cuts and bruises from his slide came into contact with Chakotay's arm. Kathryn gasped below. "Sorry Owen, I've got you now. Kathryn, I'm coming down. Be ready to take him as soon as we're low enough." He yelled down to her.

"My arm hurts Chakotay." Owen sobbed softly.

"I know, we'll get it fixed up as soon as we get you down. It's okay. Here we go now."

"Okay, I'm waiting," Kathryn called back as she moved beneath them and watched the slow progression once they started down the tree. Benjamin asked if he could help, but was waved away by Kathryn. She wanted her little boy in her arms to see for herself the damage done. When they were low enough she reached up and gently accepted the moaning little one into her arms. "I've got you, sweetheart." She waited until Chakotay was down with her and then started to take stock of Owen's injuries.

Chakotay jumped down the last few feet and came to stand with them as they looked Owen over. His shirt was tattered and the chest and stomach underneath were scratched and bleeding in places and raw red in others. His right shoulder was out of socket and he was hysterical, this much was obvious, they wouldn't know more with out a medical tricorder to assist them. Kathryn was frantic about internal injuries. Chakotay gently re-appropriated Owen from her; holding him with an arm behind his back trying not to touch his shoulder and the other under his knees.

Owen cried all the way back to the house where Chakotay put him into the car. Kathryn got in with him and held his head in her lap wiping away his tears whispering soothing assurances that it would stop hurting soon. She was, in truth, crying with him.

"We'll be at Starfleet Medical, I'll call as soon as we find something out." Chakotay called out to Phoebe as he got into the car and as soon as she acknowledged she'd heard him he sped off for the nearest transport station.

The on-duty ensign at the station waved them straight through to the back as she saw it was an emergency. Kathryn now carried Owen and Chakotay followed her. They appeared in the Emergency Transporter room at Starfleet Medical. They were met by a nurse and she ran a tricorder over Owen. She surmised that he was in no immediate danger, no internal injuries and the bleeding from the cuts and scrapes had already stopped. She asked them then to explain what had happened and fill out a medical history report for Owen. She looked like a brash ensign and Kathryn, being on edge, used her Captain's presence to snap angrily at the young woman. "Does it look like I have time to answer any questions, I want you to treat him now. Get me the DOCTOR, now."

Chakotay knew her mother tone well, but this time it was laden with the captain and the young woman had retreated two steps and was attempting a third when a calm gentle female voice intervened and a delicate hand rested on the nurse's shoulder. "Let's calm down and I'll have a look. We can get history and cause after I've treated him." But Kathryn had meant 'the Doctor,' Voyager's holo-doc, and was about to protest this woman coming near Owen when Chakotay's hand rested on her own shoulder.

"Thank you, Doctor, we appreciate that."

"Chakotay," she began.

"It's going to take too long to find him Kathryn. I think it would be better for Owen if this doctor has a look now. Don't you?"

She stopped for a moment while his words sank in. "Okay."

"Right this way," The red-head doctor led them into a pediatric room and bade Kathryn put Owen on the bio-bed with baby animals on it. "What is your name big guy?"

"Owen." His voice was tight with pain still. He watched as this woman retrieved a tricorder and passed it over his head. The lady Doctor scanned the readings and put the tricorder down. She grabbed a dermal regenerator from the stand beside the bed and delicately pulled the shirt away from Owen's scratches and up over his head. A few of the spots where the blood had dried to the shirt started to bleed again when the material pulled away. Owen flinched, but it didn't hurt so bad as his shoulder did. The doctor deftly passed the regenerator over the angry gashes and they disappeared as the equipment sealed them and made it as though they were never there. She just as gently pulled his pants off to seal the cuts, and heal the bruises on his legs. It again passed over his hands and arms to restore them as well. When she'd finished with the regeneration she helped Owen put a gown on. It would be cleaner and more presentable than the tattered and dirty clothes.

"Okay, Owen. That part is done. That was the easy part though." She smiled at the little boy on her bio-bed, before turning to his mother. "He's not seriously injured, no internal injuries, his cuts are gone now. A couple may leave a scar but they were nothing to worry about, but his right shoulder is out of socket, and in three-hundred years the best way to fix that is still to pop it back into socket. I'll give him a hypo to alleviate as much of the pain as possible, but it will still be very painful for him. If I had to guess at a cause, I'd say he took a nasty fall."

"He did," Chakotay answered her staying beside Kathryn while she held Owen's left hand to make certain that the doctor didn't have to dance around an hysterical parent. "He fell while climbing up to a tree house. The ladder was old and rotten and one of the top rungs crumbled in his hands. He slid most of the way down until his right shoulder hit the limb."

"I see, that would be the reason his shoulder is out of socket." She went back to her patient. "I'm going to have to ask that your mommy step outside for a few minutes so that I can fix your arm up. It isn't something I'd want to watch if it were my son. It's going to hurt a bit." She looked up at Kathryn who had a determined set to her jaw. "Is he allergic to specific medicines?"

"It would be faster if you just called his history up on the PADD."

"Of course," The doctor called up his information and took note of the allergies, "all right then, I've got you." She loaded a hypospray and waited for a few moments while it took effect. "We're ready."

Chakotay nodded and began gently urging Kathryn toward the door. Owen had been quiet for some time now drawing strength and comfort from his mother's hand in his own. As Chakotay pulled her further along her hand slipped from Owen's. "Mommy!" He began to panic at the lost contact.

"Chakotay let go!" Kathryn tried to pull away, but Chakotay had a firm grip and they exited the room.

"You don't want to watch this Kathryn. Come with me, and let Doctor Crusher finish this quickly. She's the best, I hear." The woman doctor smiled at the recognition, but was busy with other matters and didn't acknowledge them.

Kathryn had been so worried about Owen and fearing the worst, and hearing the words of her future self, 'Owen and Seven of Nine are going to die,' and worrying that their fate couldn't be changed, to notice the soft-spoken doctor who was treating him. She was ashamed now, she'd known Beverly in the Academy they'd had a science class together. She nodded then and gave in, letting Chakotay usher her out of the room.

Beverly Crusher had been called to Earth to do some tests on tissue samples for the Admiralty of Starfleet during the trial regarding this child's status. She'd never expected to meet him face to face, but she now was glad that she had been given the chance. He was not what they'd thought when contemplating what a clone would be like. He was his own little person. She tried to calm him by smoothing his hair out of his face. "Owen, my name is Beverly. I'm going to help you okay? Don't be scared."

"Where's Mommy?" His tears still rolled but she'd gotten his attention.

"She's outside, she has to wait out there for me to finish helping you."

"I want her. I'm scared without her. I want Chakotay too. Let them back in here."

"I will in just a few minutes, but I need to help you first. Your arm still hurts doesn't it." He nodded softly. "I'm going to fix it, but it's going to hurt again. It'll hurt worse for a moment."

"I don't want more hurting." He was distressed now.

"It's just for a very short time, and then it won't hurt anymore at all. Are you ready?" She asked him.

"No, but you better go ahead and do it because I don't think I'll ever get ready if it's going to hurt more." She smiled at his brave attempt at humor.

"Okay. Why don't you tell me what you see in those pictures on the wall." He nodded and began to describe the animals he saw in the pictures. Crusher braced herself as she put a hand on Owen's injured shoulder. The other gripped his arm and when he was in the middle of a description of the third poster she simultaneously pulled on the arm and applied direct, precise pressure to the joint. Owen screamed in torment, but she felt the ball slip back into the socket. "Okay it's over, baby, no more pain like that." She pulled him up to a sitting position and held him for a moment to comfort him. "It's going to be a little sore for a bit, but it will go away before you know it. I'm going to get your mommy now, you lie here and rest."

"Okay." Owen said through his tears. His Mama was soon by his side and wiping his and her own tears away. Crusher and Chakotay returned as well.

"Captain, I need your consent to administer another hypospray to dampen the aches and pains that his shoulder will give him for the next few hours. I'll use the regenerator on the pulled muscles and ligaments, but there is only so much a tissue regenerator can do in this situation. It will shorten the healing time considerably though. Instead of a few weeks it will only be a matter of days before he's well and ready to tackle that tree again. She was smiling down at the boy, who was again holding his Mommy's hand.

"Not without an adult next time, right little fox?"

"Yes, Mama, I know better now. There aren't any safeties here." He looked suitably chagrined.

"Doctor Crusher, please proceed, and thank you." Kathryn's voice held gratitude and admiration both. "I'm sorry I acted the way I did. It's just I can't seem to control myself when he's hurt or ill."

"It's quite all right, Kathryn. I know what it's like to be a frantic mother." She administered the hypospray.

"I'm still getting used to it." Kathryn said as Crusher again used the regenerator on Owen. "It's nice to have the Fleet's best doctor around when my own isn't available." The other woman turned off the equipment and put it away.

"Her name is Beverly, Mama." Owen said already bouncing back in the wonderful way that belongs to all children. Kathryn laughed softly and caressed his cheek with the back of an index finger.

"I know sweetheart, but I was being courteous and acknowledging her station and rank."

"Oh." Crusher instructed him to sit up and lift his arm as high as he could. He had it about three-fourths of the way raised when he drew in a sharp breath. "It still hurts."

"The meds haven't kicked in yet, they won't for a few more minutes. The meds I gave him won't interfere with his normal activities. He might be drowsy for tonight, but shouldn't experience any other side-effects. I do want him to take it easy for at least two days."

"Consider it done. I'll stick around a little longer and make sure he gets his rest." Chakotay said from behind Kathryn.

Crusher chose not to speculate at the moment. For now she walked Owen through some exercises to help with his shoulder. He rolled it forward and then back as far as he could. After her assessment she produced a sling for him. "I want you to wear this and let your arm rest as much as possible for the next two days, Owen."

"Okay." He stated as she helped him settle it properly. Kathryn helped him adjust it and Crusher gave him a clean bill of health.

"Now to update his information." She pulled out the PADD she'd used earlier, and began asking Kathryn questions. Chakotay excused himself to call her mother and let them know what was going on. When he returned to them the gathering of information was finished and the women were conversing casually. Catching up with each other and what had been happening other than the obvious since their one shared academy class. "I admit that after the tests I declined to do, I didn't expect to see any of Voyager's crew. It's quite a treat to see both the heroes of the hour at the same time, and in the same place."

"We didn't exactly plan this trip. It was supposed to be a quiet afternoon spent with my family and a good friend helping Owen to adjust to life on Earth. Unfortunately Owen has a knack for changing my plans in the most dramatic of ways."

"That's for sure." Chakotay walked in having heard only Kathryn's last sentence. Owen was now sitting calmly on her lap looking tired. "Come here, little man." He lifted Owen from Kathryn's lap and looked him over. He had the sudden urge to crush the boy to him, but he didn't, only kissed his forehead gently. "That was from your grandma. She said to tell you not to climb anymore trees for a while." He looked over at Kathryn then. "She also said that dinner would be in the warmer and that Phoebe and Ben have decided to stay the rest of the weekend. I guess I'll be heading home when I drop the two of you off. She said that you and Owen will continue to share a room and a bed, as if she didn't know that you wouldn't let him out of your sight for the next, I'd say, twelve or more hours. She doesn't know you like the crew does where Owen is concerned does she?"

"She'll learn. All of you did, and you don't have to leave. We can always make room for one more in the Janeway house. Let's see, Phoebe and Ben will be in the guest room. Their girls in Phoebe's room, you and Owen in mine and I'll sleep with mom. See there, thirty seconds and the problem is solved."

"Unless Owen doesn't want to sleep with me."

"Then you can sleep with my mom." Kathryn teased. Owen giggled softly from Chakotay's arms.

Crusher watched the exchange with interest. It seemed that they'd forgotten she was in the room with them. She wondered if she were the first officer to feel left out when in the presence of these two. "If you don't mind a little intrusion, can I ask how Commander Chakotay got involved in this?"

The man in question stiffened, how would Kathryn react and answer. It started predictably.

"Owen is having a hard time adjusting as I said and I asked Chakotay out to help Owen settle in. Those two are very close," she nodded toward them, "and I wanted my family to meet him. Her tone left room for speculation as to the nature of their relationship. That surprised Chakotay.

"Do I detect something more than just friendship between the two of you?" Crusher asked candidly, and Kathryn's answer this time out and out shocked Chakotay.

"We're working on it. That's unofficial, but there's been a chemistry between us from day one on Voyager, but we couldn't act on it there. This weekend we're testing the water's so-to-speak." Chakotay looked at her unabashed joy and shock warring for control of his face. His dimples showed just the same. Crusher merely nodded as if she knew exactly what they were talking about.

"I know what you mean, and I'll give you a little advice. You don't have to take it, but it's good advice. Hold onto each other while you can. Assert your intentions because if you don't you'll never have a chance. If you want another ship Starfleet command would be crazy to split you up, but they'll try. If the rumor mill is to be trusted they want you back Kathryn, and they want you badly. It gives you a chance to keep your first officer and have a relationship with him if you want another ship, that is."

"I'm not sure about another command. I want to watch Owen grow. I want a chance to have at least one more child, and I think that Voyager was enough command for me. How do I top seven years in the Delta Quadrant?"

"I can understand that."

"Beverly, if you don't mind my asking, where is the Enterprise?" Chakotay wanted a subject change.

"I was recalled by the admiralty during the trial deciding Owen's fate. As soon as I learned what it was for I told them to go to hell, and let you keep your son, but they don't listen to doctors very often. Anyway, I was scheduled to attend a symposium here a week after I was recalled so I just stayed. I was here to check up on a few friends when the three of you came in." She smiled at Owen resting his head on Chakotay's shoulder, wide awake and silent listening to every word they said. "I admit that I was curious to meet the tiny child that split Starfleet Command in half. Frankly, I'm glad that your fight paid off."

"So am I." Kathryn's hushed tones were muffled as she rested her head on Owen's back. "Owen is my light." Silence fell after that. Chakotay finally broke it asking if they were cleared to go home. Crusher nodded and gave some last minute instructions to Kathryn. They then made their way to a transporter room and beamed back to Indiana.

Chapter 36

On the drive from the station to Gretchen's home Chakotay asked how she'd known something was wrong. "I'm not sure. It was like the incident with Neelix's food being bad. I just felt uneasy. Then it coalesced into something more tangible."

"What made you turn around in the woods?" Chakotay asked suspiciously.

"Let's just say I never thought I'd be thanking Q."

"He kept up his end of the bargain then." She nodded.

"I still worry that the Admiral's prediction will come to pass." She caressed Owen's sleeping face where he rested against her side. "I couldn't bear to lose him, Chakotay, I couldn't bear to lose either of you." Chakotay reached over and took her hand, raised it to his lips and kissed it.

"You won't. I'm going to stick around for as long as I can, and I'll help you take care of Owen."

"Good. Then you are staying tonight aren't you." He nodded and kissed her hand again.

"For as long as you like." He added softly.

"Forever." He looked startled for a moment.

"If that's what you want."

"It is." She lapsed into silence when they turned onto her mother's drive. "This discussion is tabled until later on tonight. It's going to be a zoo when we arrive. I love you." She nodded toward the approaching house.

"I love you too, Kathryn." He again kissed their entwined fingers.

"They're already out on the porch waiting for us." The car rolled to a stop and Gretchen stepped off her porch to approach the car as the passengers emerged into the night air. Kathryn roused Owen and lifted him off the seat when he protested. He locked his legs around her waist and his left arm around her shoulders. "Okay Owen. We're going inside now." Gretchen met them half way and looked Owen over.

"He looks okay to me." The relief in her voice struck Kathryn's heartstrings. She was still worried about how people would react to Owen.

"He's fine, Mom, just a little sleepy right now. The Doctor said that the medicine would make him drowsy, and he's had a big day. I'm going to get him to bed as soon as we get some food in him and a bath taken."

"That sounds like a good plan." She ushered the three of them up the steps and into the house. Chakotay accepted the sleepy five-year-old as Kathryn discarded her shoes and pulled Owen's off as well. Phoebe took over for her mother telling her to go and enjoy her granddaughters, as she led the trio into the kitchen for some dinner. They got Owen up long enough to eat a plate, though he'd probably never remember that he'd eaten a green bean casserole. Kathryn was thankful that she'd remembered to tell her mother that Chakotay was a vegetarian.

After dinner, Phoebe had returned to the living room to converse with her mother and husband, they ascended the stairs to get Owen bathed. Chakotay took the bottom half and Kathryn the top. Owen was soon spotless and in his clean pair of pajamas. He was awake enough now that he didn't want to go to bed, but still drowsy enough to sit calmly in Chakotay's lap and doze, so he and Chakotay joined the rest of the family downstairs as Kathryn took a lengthy bath to calm her nerves. She appeared in a clean dress a bit later and it was Chakotay's turn. Kathryn had informed her mother that after the scare with Owen he'd be staying with them and she'd be sharing her mother's room. It was Kathryn's turn to cradle Owen in Chakotay's absence.

When Chakotay reappeared it was nearing 2200 hours and both girls were fast asleep and tucked into their mother's old bed. Kathryn and Phoebe went to finish cleaning the kitchen for their mother so that she could bathe in peace. Ben sat in the living room with Chakotay and Owen who was again dozing and ready for bed.

When Phoebe and Kathryn had finished the four retired upstairs and parted ways to enter separate rooms. Phoebe and her husband to one room and Kathryn, Chakotay and Owen into the other. She wanted to sit with them until Owen had fallen asleep completely. She and Chakotay sat on the bed with Owen between them holding onto one another. She was reluctant to leave when her little fox finally drifted off. She kissed his face and bade him and Chakotay sleep well. She kissed Chakotay softly as well and took her nightgown with her to change and join her mother in the bed.

Chapter 37

She tossed and turned for quite sometime before Gretchen finally asked, in exasperation, "what in the world is wrong, Katie bird."

The use of her childhood nickname threw her for a minute. "You haven't called me that since I was a little girl, Mom."

"I know. It was the last time you slept in the bed with your father and me. You wiggled around so much I didn't think we'd ever get to sleep. I finally asked you, `please little Katie bird, go to sleep for mommy,' and you did."

"I'm sorry, Mom. I'm just having a hard time relaxing without Owen's breathing. It usually lulls me to sleep. Plus I'm still worried about him. Before we got home I got a bad glimpse at the future. Owen wasn't in it. I'm afraid that it's a fate I can't change."

"It's nonsense, Kath. Don't worry about him. I know you too well, and you'll never let anything happen to him. If listening to him breathe will help you sleep go in there and sleep with those two. I'm sure Owen needs you as much as you do him, and it'll give you a chance to be with the man you love. Phoebe told me what you two talked about on your walk. Go to him sweetheart, be happy." Gretchen kissed the bridge of her daughter's nose and then pushed her out of the bed. Kathryn smiled at her and left the room. She walked across the hall and into her old bedroom. The only light in the room came from the shutters that were still open. She smiled and went to close them, quietly, as the soft breathing of her Owen mixed with the deep even breaths from Chakotay. She noticed that her former first officer, the man she loved, was curled around Owen protectively leaving ample room for her to crawl in behind him.

She crossed to the bed and slipped between the covers behind him wrapping her arms around him as she did. He roused at the contact. "Kathryn? What are you doing?"

"Getting comfortable. I was tossing and turning in there with Mom and she sent me to you two."

"I thought we were going to go slow, beautiful." He said rearranging himself to look at her, careful not to dislodge either of the bed's other occupants. It was rather small for three. She let him settle on his back and then claimed his chest for her new pillow. Again her arm slipped around him, and Owen slumbered on oblivious.

"I don't want to go slow, Chakotay. We went slow for seven years. Do you want to know what Phoebe and I talked about today on our walk? What we were coming back to the house for?"

He didn't know where she was going but decided to follow her. "I'd love to."

"She asked about you and me. She wanted to know what was between us. I told her what we talked about last night, but Chakotay, I wasn't entirely honest last night. I want to be with you. I don't want to feel awkward in front of others. I told Phoebe that I want to love you, and be loved by you, and have children with you, and be deliriously happy. We were coming back to the house so I could steal you away for a walk to talk about this, but then Owen...," she trailed off not wanting to think about it, "and well I got sidetracked, but I don't want to wait any longer. I want you and I want you to want me, and I want to be together. I said forever in the car and I meant it."

"I had no doubts, Kathryn, but I don't want to push. Every time I push you run away."

"No more." She proved it by raising her head and pressing her lips to his as she lie full on top of him, holding him close when he would have pulled away as she deepened her assault on his mouth. The heat of his chest through the thin night gown was delicious. He felt her soft warmth too and wanted nothing more than to claim her right then, but not with Owen sharing the bed. Soon but not tonight, still he let her explore for a while.

She kissed his lips, his eyes, his dimples, and his chin. She traced his tattoo with a finger and then with her lips. She told him how much she loved him with these actions. She begged for forgiveness as she kissed the hollow of his throat, and the skin above his heart, finally she returned to his lips kissing him needing to know if he'd forgiven her and he showed her he had when he allowed her questing tongue entry for the first time.

She gasped into his mouth and choked on a sob as she was granted that forgiveness. Then it was his turn to explore her face and neck. Her brow he was familiar with, her lips were becoming his favorite spot, her cheek bones had been visited once. Her chin was new territory as were her ears and the pulse in the hollow of her throat. He longed to take this further but as Owen sighed beside them they disengaged their lips and simply let hands take over. His left hand wandered her back while hers traced the hard planes of his chest. This wasn't arousing exploration, it was calm, soothing and forgiving and tender.

They'd soon drifted into sleep their hands and minds slowing and finally stopping activities completely. Owen eventually gravitated slowly to them and Chakotay unconsciously put his free arm around the boy. They slept that way only waking once to allow Chakotay to switch positions. Kathryn woke once and pulled Owen closer to them, seeing that he'd drifted too close to the edge for her comfort.

Gretchen looked in on them in the wee hours of the morning and smiled at the image they made. They'd shifted sometime in the night and now Chakotay was resting on one side of the bed, Owen was atop his chest and stomach. Chakotay's right hand was steady on his little chest. Kathryn was snuggled up close to Chakotay's left side, and had her right arm across Owen's legs. Her head rested just beside Owen's on Chakotay's upper chest just above his heart. The peace around the three was tangible, and she left before she could disturb that aura. It would be three hours before they awakened.

Chapter 38

Owen stretched atop Chakotay starting to rouse from his restful night's sleep. He unconsciously raised his arms over his head in doing so and yelped as his shoulder protested the abuse. It was stiff this morning. Kathryn was instantly worried and wide awake.

"What, are you okay, sweetheart?" Owen rolled off Chakotay's chest and sat up. His actions in turn woke the former commander.

"Yes, I just stretched too hard, Mama. My shoulder is still sore. Sorry I woke you up." The sounds of the active household drifted lightly to them. "You still look tired Mama, go back to sleep. I'm not sleepy anymore, I'll go see what everyone is doing. Don't worry, I'll stay inside and take it easy."

"Okay, but you don't have to stay inside, just be careful and don't wander too far if you do go out."

"I will." He leaned back across Chakotay, who'd been listening silently to mother and son. Owen kissed his mother and left the bed, he gathered his clothes and changed then left the room still adjusting the sling as he closed the door quietly. They could hear his soft steps recede down the hall and fade away when he reached the stairs.

"Good morning." Chakotay finally said.

Kathryn's mouth quirked in her trademark smirk. "Not yet, it's not. I'm going to take my son's orders and sleep a little longer." She slipped her arms back around him and rested her head in the crook of his neck with her breath caressing just above his pulse. He shivered with the sensation, his arms coming to hold her possessively. "I love you." She whispered before succumbing to sleep. He smiled hugging her tight to tell her he loved her as well.

Sometime in her sleep Kathryn turned onto her side, her back to Chakotay, and he spooned up against her entwining his fingers with hers above her stomach and his right leg resting across hers. They awoke in this position just over an hour after Owen had left them. It was Chakotay who woke her this time, his lips teasing the back of her neck. "Now this, this is good morning." She stated in a heavy morning voice filled with content. She raised their hands to her lips and kissed the center of his palm delicately.

"It certainly is, I don't want to move."

"Afraid you'll wake up?" He nodded against her. "Me too." She rolled in his arms to face him re-engaging their legs when she had, but raising her hands to frame his face. She kissed him sweetly, lingering as long as the frailties of Human lungs would allow. "Good morning, Chakotay."

"Good morning, my love, now I know I'm dreaming. Ouch!" He exclaimed as she pinched his arm mercilessly. "What was that for?"

"You aren't dreaming, Chakotay," she grinned deviously, "you're mine."

"I didn't know there was any dispute of that."

"There isn't, not anymore." She kissed him to prove it.

"I could get used to this, but I have a sneaky suspicion that if we don't appear downstairs soon a certain young someone will be banging the door down." As if he'd conjured them up there were footfalls out in the hall, then a muffled voice.

"Wait, Ally, we need to be quiet. I had Mommy all worried last night and she needs to rest, so walk softly." The foot steps disappeared and a few seconds later they heard a door open and rustling on the other side of the wall at their heads, and then the door closing.

"Just when I think I can't possibly love him more than I already do, he says or does something like that." Her eyes were misty and her voice full.

"He's you Kathryn, he's destined to be remarkable."

"I suppose so. Let's get up." She kissed him again and rose from the bed. She grabbed one of her dresses from the closet and disappeared so he could change too. He made the bed first, then donned the shirt and pants that he'd packed the day before. She returned to put away her robe and toss the night gown in the hamper and they left the room hand-in-hand.

Chapter 39

They parted ways at the bottom of the stairs, Chakotay headed to the Kitchen and Kathryn detouring to the living room where Owen and Ally were playing a game of Kadis-khat on the floor. She stole up behind her son and encircled him with her arms pulling him close, but being careful of the sling enclosed arm. "Good morning, my Owen."

"Good morning, Mommy. Did you sleep good?" He looked up at her over his shoulder bright-eyed and content.

"Very well, thank you." She kissed his forehead softly.

"What did you do that for, Mama?" He asked perceptively.

"For taking such good care of me."

"You're welcome," he returned her kiss by craning his neck to reach her cheek. "Uh oh, it's my move. Naomi showed me a good one to counter that positioning."

"Then I'll let you get back to it. I love you, little fox." She kissed him again.

"Love you too, Mama." She let him go and watched as he executed his move. He was right it was a good counter. Then she stood and followed Chakotay into the kitchen.

She entered the kitchen just as Chakotay turned from the counter with a cup of coffee in his hand. She took a deep breath of her mother's kitchen in the morning. It had become her habit to take in this familiar scent, and dissect the aromas that it was made of. Coffee was foremost what she smelled. Behind the coffee was the lingering whiff of Gretchen's prepared breakfast and the undertones of the breeze and sunshine that flowed through the open windows and her mother's lavender bath oils and hand cream. A scent that would follow her throughout the day.

Chakotay met her half-way and slipped the cup in her hands. She kissed him for it. "Just like you like it, black with lots of caffeine."

"Thank you, Chakotay." She then let her hands caress his as she pulled away. Again showing her love for him openly in front of others. "Good morning all." A chorus of good mornings answered. No one really looked up from their individual interests though. Gretchen and Ben were passing portions of the news back and forth, and Phoebe was helping Lissy finish her breakfast, and they were all conversing comfortably.

Chakotay returned to the counter to fix his morning tea while Kathryn settled into a chair to read the news as it was passed to her. "Breakfast's in the warmer, you two." Gretchen interrupted herself from the conversation she'd been holding with Ben about Ally's grades in school. It reminded Kathryn of a conversation she and her mother had when she'd told her about Owen and his troubles adjusting to life off of Voyager.

"Speaking of school, Chakotay, I had a thought about Owen and Naomi. They're so used to having just the two of them in the classroom, and the diversity of the teaching methods we used on Voyager, well, I'm worried if putting them in a normal classroom setting might not be the right thing to do. Owen is having a hard enough time adjusting to life here. I was thinking that maybe if we kept his lessons the same, at least. He might have an easier time with everything."

"Sound reasoning, but are you going to keep him in private lessons for the rest of his education, or were you thinking of putting him in school at a later time. I don't think Naomi will have too much trouble settling in. Owen, though, I can see why you're worried." He'd spoken as though he'd read her mind.

"I was thinking of putting him in school when the next beginning semester started. The classes have already been in session for four months. I'm sure he'd have no trouble where content is concerned, but I don't want to stick him in an unfamiliar setting in the middle of the curriculum. The other side though is if we don't put him in a normal school now, he'll have to go through another period of adjustment when we do put him in a regular classroom."

"I think you're over-analyzing, Kathryn. Worrying about something before you really need to." Chakotay knew her too well, sometimes. Phoebe, being a counselor of sorts, listened to the exchange and formulated a theory while they discussed the options. She didn't miss her sister's use of plurals either. Kathryn was speaking like this involved both herself and Chakotay as parents rather than herself alone.

"Kath, why don't you talk to the school that you'd like to enroll him in and see if he can sit in and try out the classroom. I'm sure they would allow it, and I can guarantee that Owen will let you know if he likes it or not. He could observe for, say, a week and if at the end of that week he doesn't like it you'll know to go with the private tutor. If he does like it you can enroll him and that would solve the problem. Plus you won't have to worry about the adjustment so much if he does like it. It's better than just springing the new routine on him."

"I think that's a good idea, Kathryn, remember what I said last year about asking his input about things involving him. Your asking him later on helped with the situation didn't it?"

"Yes, I didn't have any problems after I asked his opinion. He was crystal clear that he didn't want to go back to Fair Haven."

"See, I told you he was perceptive."

"I knew that already. If he wasn't he wouldn't have the nick-name that he does. He picks up Tom's sarcastic wit faster than any child has a right. I'll try that. It sounds like the best approach. First things first, I need to find a house or an apartment in San Francisco." She was perusing the classified ads as she spoke.

"Why there," Chakotay was curious. Would she return to Starfleet as a captain?

"Habit mostly, and to be close to the job offers. I've had plenty, and I must say that the science position at HQ is the best so far. I like the city too." She smiled innocently, "why don't you help Owen and I look. You may as well like the house too."

"I just might do that." He accepted her offer with a dimpled grin. "If you're going into town to look this week, I'll give you a ride, I promised to go and visit B'ela anyway."

"So you're planning on kidnapping us then, I suppose I have no objection. I'd like to see the baby in a calmer setting anyway. I swear I thought I'd never get to see Miral up close until the banquet. Besides they still have some of Owen's things, and if I ever want to sleep without Owen in my bed again I need to get his Flotter back."

"I had wondered why he was sleeping in the bed with you."

"Now you know. I have to pry the thing away when it gets too dirty, and if he can't find Flotter at bedtime hold your ears." There were chuckles around the table.

"Believe me I know, I've seen first hand what happens when someone takes it away from him." Chakotay said with a grin. "Poor Icheb tried to get a closer look at it one day in the mess hall. Owen had set it aside for a moment, and Icheb picked it up. I swear Owen reached a pitch that had me worried about the view-ports shattering and decompressing the room. Everyone in the room at that moment complained that their ears continued to ring for twenty minutes after it was over. You should have seen the look on Icheb's face. When it registered that the reason Owen was screaming was the toy, he gave it back faster than I knew anyone could move. I was laughing so hard I had to sit down, great tears rolling and all." The others were all laughing now as well.

"Oh, Owen." Kathryn blushed in amused embarrassment, inciting harder laugher around the table.

"What?" Owen had entered just as she'd spoken his name.

"Nothing, little fox, we're just talking. Come here." She beckoned unnecessarily, he was headed for her anyway. "Can I get you something?"

"No, Mama, my shoulder hurts." He looked uncomfortable as he walked over.

"Let me look at it." She lifted his arm out of the sling and felt of the joint. It had stiffened while he and Ally were playing Kadis-Khat. He winced and sucked in a breath as she felt of it. "Sorry, baby, I'll try to help it." She started to massage his shoulder a little.

"Ow, that's too hard, Mama." He informed her trying to pull away.

"I'm sorry, sweetheart." Kathryn let go swiftly.

"Come over here, Owen." Chakotay ordered. "Let the expert have a try." Owen walked over and Chakotay took matters into his own gentle hands. After a few minutes of the massage Owen stated it didn't hurt any longer.

"Thank you, Chakotay." Owen hugged him and returned to his mother's lap.

"I should have known to just send him to you. Mister magic fingers Maquis." Chakotay laughed at that.

"Thanks for trying, Mama." His left hand reached back and took hers. He then pulled it in front of himself and hugged it close while leaning back against her.

"You're welcome, My Owen."

"Mama, can Ally and I go outside. I want to look around some more." He sounded more like he was asking her to come along.

"Sure, I could use some sunshine myself, I'll come too. If it's okay?" She looked down at him.

"Why wouldn't it be, Mama?"

"I have no idea, lets go." She nudged him off her lap as she stood and picked up her coffee, "join us, Chakotay?"

"With pleasure, Captain."

Chapter 40

Kathryn rolled her eyes and departed without waiting for him. She stepped out onto the front porch to a cloudy sky, and a pleasant breeze. Owen and Ally were already out in the yard studying something that Kathryn couldn't see. She didn't even turn when the door behind her opened and shut. She did set her coffee cup down on a small table though.

"If we're back to using each other's rank, I suppose you won't need the company when you go to Tom and `Lanna's." She stated teasingly in answer to the use of her rank, she then stepped away to sit in a chair.

"I don't think so." He reached out and grasped her wrist pulling her back to him. She toppled into his arms. "You're stuck with me, besides I'm the one with the transport. You need me."

Abruptly all the banter and mischief left her, and her half-hearted attempts at escape ceased. "Yes I do, but not because you have a transport."

"I love you too, Kathryn." He smiled softly at her sincerity. Kathryn stretched up and kissed the tip of his chin, and then wrapped her arms around behind him hugging tightly. Behind her a squeal of "Hey! give that back!" sounded and it was shortly followed by Owen's spirited giggles and the pounding of feet. Kathryn turned around keeping Chakotay close and watched Ally chase her son around the yard, trying to re-attain whatever it was that he clutched in his left hand. For the moment she wouldn't interfere.

Ally was older and slightly taller, but Owen was quick on his little feet and evaded her easily. She eventually gave up the direct approach and started to use her smarts to try and catch him. She was between Owen and the house near a tree that Kathryn remembered her father planting just before she'd entered the academy. It was a towering shade tree now.

Shortly Owen sensed that he was no longer being pursued and turned around to look for her. "Where did she go?" He called back to them.

Kathryn shrugged, "I don't know, sweetheart." She wouldn't give him the advantage unfairly.

Chakotay, though, nodded toward the tree that Ally was hidden behind. Owen nodded back and grinned. He sneaked up to the tree and then slinked around the other side. He yelled "Boo!" startling Ally, who screamed and started to chase him again.

Kathryn brushed her head against Chakotay's chest affectionately, "that was cheating Commander." She admonished lightly.

"Ahh, yes it was, Ma'am, but it helped Owen." He said in a playful tone.

"No excuse, that was unfair."

"It's just a game, and it can't be undone. They're having fun." They watched for a few moments and Kathryn noticed that Ally was beginning to look disgusted. She was about to interfere and order Owen to give the item back when Ally just stopped.

"Forget it, I quit, it's just a stupid snail shell anyway. I can get another one." Owen stopped then too, and turned back to her. He looked upset that she'd stopped.

"Here Ally," he held out the shell, "I didn't really want it. I just wanted you to chase me."

"Why didn't you just say so?" She accepted the shell from him.

"I like to play chase, I play with Naomi and Flotter all the time. Don't you like to play chasing games, Ally?"

"Yeah, I do, when you're it!" She quickly tapped his hand and took off running again. Owen was in hot pursuit and they were on a direct course for the porch. Kathryn saw their intent and curved the idea before it could take place.

"Hold it, leave us out of this." She commanded and pointed back toward the yard. Chakotay noted a suspicious twinkle in Owen's bright blues, and as Ally pulled around and headed behind the house Owen bounded up the steps. He grinned Kathryn's mischievous grin and tapped his mother once on the leg.

"You're it now, Mama." He had the gall to giggle before he vaulted off the steps and trailed Ally.

"Little turkey," Kathryn took three steps after him and then turned, "wait a minute, I detest being it." She returned to Chakotay and kissed him softly. She tapped his chest while he regained his equilibrium and stated, "you're it. Catch us if you can."

She heard him mutter something that sounded suspiciously like `vixen' before she was out of earshot around the corner of the house. It became apparent after a few minutes to the children that the game had evolved into something else. They were being completely ignored by Chakotay. Ally gave up and returned to the porch, but Owen was still trotting after his Mama and Chakotay, as she led them further and further from the house. They'd left him far behind though and he was now following their trail in the dirt.

Kathryn had the same advantages as Owen, but Chakotay was no slouch. During their journey, while she'd been holed up in her readyroom going over reports and drinking coffee, Chakotay had spent his day's off boxing, so what he lacked in speed he made up for in endurance. Thanks to that endurance he was closer than Kathryn expected when she stopped to double back toward the house. She'd just managed her turn when Chakotay wrapped his arms around her shoulders and allowed his momentum to take them both into the soft, freshly-plowed earth. She had expected the landing to be painful, but he'd caught himself enough to prevent harming her.

"Did I ever tell you I hated to play tag as a kid, Kathryn?"

"No, but it doesn't matter now anyway. You got me." He was drowning in her eyes.

"Yes, I did, and I'm not letting go either." He was out of breath, but that wasn't the cause of the huskiness in his voice.

"Good, I wouldn't let you." She lifted her head and captured his lips with her own. He surrendered gratefully with a groan, and drank of her as though she were the glass of water he desired after the exertion. Kathryn smiled and teased him with an arch of her back beneath him, bringing their hips into contact. He jerked out of the kiss in surprise at the jolt of desire that ran through him.

"Spirits woman." He tried to still his racing heart.

"What, you didn't like that?" She asked innocently.

"No, I definitely enjoyed that, perhaps too much. That's the problem. You shouldn't make suggestions when they can't be acted upon."

"True, but what if I told you it was a promise for later."

"I'd say we need to get busy looking for you a house. That's a promise I'd like to follow through on at the earliest opportunity."

Kathryn's playful demeanor changed once more, "how about we look for us a home?"

"Move in together?" He was unsure if he'd heard correctly, but his heart soared with hope.

"Yes, I'd like the chance to follow through with my promise too." She was afraid he'd say no. That he'd be against living together while still so new with their relationship.

"I would love to, but only if I can look forward to marrying you soon after." He watched her face, scared she wouldn't catch the sincerity behind the odd wording.

"I thought you'd never ask." She pulled him back down and kissed him hard.

"I take it that's a yes." He stated after they'd pulled apart.

"Yes."

"Good." He kissed her once again. "Spirits, I love you."

"I know, and I know you know I love you too."

Chapter 41

He tightened his grip on her and they held each other intimately for a time, until Kathryn saw movement from the corner of her eye. "Watch your back, Commander, there appears to be a sneak attack in progress." She'd barely uttered the words when Owen landed on Chakotay's back with a thud.

"Hey, you were supposed to play with us, too." He sounded a little dejected. Chakotay grinned at her momentarily then rolled to his left dumping Owen in the dirt with them. "Woah!" Kathryn hear his oomph and then a sneeze as the dust rose. "Now that's more like it." Owen got up not bothering to dust off and tackled Chakotay again, or tried to. The dark man was ready for the attack and had Owen on his back again holding him there while Kathryn propped herself up to watch their play. She was beginning to realize that their relationship was reality and that Chakotay was going to be Owen's father in more than name and feeling.

"Looks like I won again, little man, you're still not big enough."

"It's not over yet, Chakotay." Owen talked big, but he was still immobile on the ground.

"Yes it is, you two. Dr. Crusher said rest, not roll around in the dirt." Kathryn stated in her, `that's enough young man,' mommy tone.

"Aw, but Mama, I'm not rolling around in the dirt, I'm just laying in it." He whined.

"That's still, enough." She found herself having trouble suppressing a grin.

"Yes, Ma'am." He sounded disappointed. Chakotay chuckled, but before he could join in Owen's insolence there came the soft roll of thunder in the distance.

"We'd better get back to the house." He said and got to his feet. He picked Owen up and set him on his feet . Chakotay offered his hand to Kathryn. She took it and he pulled her up gently. He dusted her off as she dusted him.

"Thank you."

"My pleasure." He stated while his hand rested on her softly rounded bottom.

"Actually, it's ours, I think." She reached up to wipe a smudge from his tattoo delicately.

Owen was still unhappy. "Why do we have to go?" He broke into their moment.

"It's going to rain, that's why." Kathryn said, "come here you little dust mite." He stepped closer to her and Kathryn patted him down sending dust flying, mother and son sneezed simultaneously. "Where is Ally, anyway?"

"She got tired of following you and went back to the house." He uttered as though he were astounded that the girl had quit, which he was. "Is it going to rain like in Flotter's forest, Mama." The thunder was drawing closer.

"Yes, I think so."

"It won't flood though, will it?" He sounded a little apprehensive.

"No, it has to rain very hard for a very long time for it to flood. This will be a shower like Trebus likes." She stated to reassure him.

"But Trebus hates water, that's why he keeps getting termites."

"No, my Owen, Trebus keeps getting termites because he doesn't like baths. A rainstorm is like a drink of water for Trebus."

"But then why do we have to go back?"

"Because what a tree thinks is a nice drink of water will leave us soaked through." Chakotay answered while lifting Owen up to his shoulders. The wind picked up sending a puff of dust through the air, as a precursor to the sky opening on them. The rain started as a light sprinkle, but by the time the three of them reached the house it was pouring. They were dripping as they walked up onto the porch. Ally was swinging on the swing at the end of the porch.

"You're all wet." She stated.

"Of course we are. It's raining." Owen shook his head in aggravation at her statement of the obvious, as Chakotay lifted him off his shoulders and set him on his feet.

"I'll get some towels, Grandma doesn't like water drops on her floor." Her voice held the aire of one who'd seen first hand how much Grandma disliked droplets on the floor.

"Thank you, Ally." Kathryn acknowledged her niece, and the sandy-haired little girl jumped off the swing and ran inside. She came back with three fluffy towels and handed one to each of them.

Chakotay took care of himself as Kathryn dealt with her son and herself as best she could. By the time their clothes stopped dripping, Owen's teeth were chattering with cold. Kathryn wrapped him in a towel and carried him upstairs to change. Chakotay grabbed his extras and was headed into the bathroom to change, but then realized that they were now officially together and it wasn't necessary.

"Mama," Owen said as she helped him change, "can we read my book since it's raining out."

"Sure, my Owen, you get the book and tell your cousins while I get changed."

"Okay." He pulled his shirt down over his own head and fought to get his arms through, but didn't have too much trouble. The book they were reading was on the night-stand. Owen grabbed it and left the room in search of Ally and Lissy.

Kathryn pulled off her water-logged dress and, unselfconscious of her state of undress, selected a pair of jeans and a soft, light-weight sweater to change into. Chakotay was already finished changing and watched her the whole time. When she turned after pulling on the pants, and saw him watching she grinned playfully, "enjoying the view, love."

"Most definitely, Kathryn. It's a wonderful view. Aren't you going to change your undergarments as well though?"

"I think not, mister. I've already made a promise I can't keep today, wouldn't want you calling me a tease now, would I?"

"Nope, wouldn't want that at all, you tease." He chuckled and dodged the pillow thrown at him.

"Get out of here, you flirt."

"Only if I get a kiss first, my beautiful Captain." She rolled her eyes but strode over, still only half dressed, and planted a kiss on his forehead.

"There, now get."

"That's it?" He pouted.

"For now."

"Boy, some fiancée you are. Don't even give me a proper kiss before parting ways."

"It's not like I won't see you in a few minutes, Chakotay. What have I gotten myself into? I didn't know I was signing on to care for another five-year-old." She turned to go back to dressing, and Chakotay grabbed her hips from behind, and pulled her back against him.

"You don't get away that easy, beautiful." He nuzzled her neck through her short hair, causing little goose bumps to raise on her skin. She let him hold her there with a warm, dark arm resting low around her waist. His other hand moved from her hip to caress the silken skin of her belly.

"Gods, Chakotay. Who's making promises now?" She gasped as he drew a circle around her navel. She decided he'd persuaded her and turned to capture his mouth, tangling her hands in his short hair.

"Better," he pulled away softly bestowing small kisses on her lips, "much better."

"I concede your point." She kissed him again quickly. "But I need to finish getting dressed."

"See you downstairs then." He smoothed his hair down and left her alone. The rain didn't let up for the rest of the afternoon, and Gretchen Janeway found her house filled with stories and laughter for the first time in many years.

Chapter 42

Phoebe and her family left around dusk when the storm finally let up. Gretchen and Kathryn left Owen snuggled in Chakotay's lap listening in rapt attention to a tale he was spinning for his audience, and slipped into the kitchen for some mother- daughter time.

"You three seem much more content today, Kathryn." Gretchen determined as they sat drinking coffee together.

"We are, Mom. I asked Chakotay to move in with us, which he countered with a marriage proposal." She smiled. "I don't know what happened, but there was no way I was going to turn him down. So, I guess we're engaged, it's crazy. Seven years of dancing around each other, and two weeks after we get home, in which time we barely see each other, and we're getting married." She had a dreamy look in her eyes. Gretchen was overcome.

"Oh Kath, I'm so happy for you. Is that what all that banter about a house was this morning?"

"Yes, I knew I didn't want to spend another night without him after last night. Is that wrong?" She was caught up in a whirlwind of emotion just then, talking about her newly defined relationship helped her to grasp the events more certainly now, and it was wonderfully frightening.

"No, it's not, you both deserve some happiness. Chakotay's an extraordinary man, Kath. I was able to have a good conversation with him earlier, and I can see why you love him so much." She smiled at her daughter sincerely. She had always known, since her Kathryn was a little girl, that it would take someone special to capture her heart, and she'd known even at the time of Kathryn's first serious relationship that when she found and accepted that man the relationship would move immeasurably fast. So she wasn't too surprised at Kathryn's announcement. After she'd talked with Chakotay that afternoon she'd known that he was the one, and she was happy for them both.

"Thank you, Mom." Their conversation moved on to other things after that. Chakotay kept Owen captivated with stories and games until it was time to turn in so that Kathryn could have a peaceful few hours with her mother before they found a place and moved in.

Before they turned in, Kathryn moved the three of them into her mother's guest room, which held a larger bed. She and Owen curled up and read another chapter, while Chakotay showered. They both were sound asleep when Chakotay slid into bed a bit later. Kathryn settled back against his chest when he kissed her hair and they slept.

They spent two more day's at Gretchen's home before they decided, on Wednesday morning to head to Tom and B'elanna's. They'd spent time looking for prospective homes and were planning on dropping by to tour a few of the ones that they'd found interesting. They were also going to pick out an engagement ring and wedding set today.

They'd stayed long enough to have breakfast and help with the cleanup. Chakotay called Tom to make sure it was okay to drop by that afternoon, and they set out. The trip to the transport station was quiet. Owen, who'd slept through the two previous drives to the house, was occupied looking out the back windows at the scenery.

His Mama and Chakotay had sat with him and told him they wanted to get married. Owen didn't see a problem with this, and wondered why Chakotay had asked his permission. Of course he'd given it without hesitation, and he had moved on to other things that were less confusing than adults and their worries. Now he was ready to see B'elanna and Tom again.

Chakotay and the salespeople expected Owen to be a nuisance in the jewelry stores, but Kathryn had taken a moment before entering the first store to have a talk with him. She explained what they were doing and asked him to be patient with them, promising that they'd do their best not to take too long. He surprised even her though, by walking around, with his hands in his pockets, looking at all the different bits of jewelry, or sitting contentedly in his mother's or Chakotay's laps, alternately. Listening while they were looking at engagement bands and wedding sets.

They'd gone through four stores before they found a set that they both liked, but it was two stores later that Owen found the engagement ring they bought. Kathryn and Chakotay had begun to get discouraged as they listened to the saleswoman, wondering if they should call it quits for the day and look more at another time.

"Look Mama, this one is pretty." Owen's statement was unexpected, since he'd been so quiet at all the other stores. Kathryn turned and saw that he was across the shop looking into a case display.

"Which one?" She was grateful for the distraction, none of the rings the woman was showing them had satisfied her. She was looking for something that would jump out at her and say I'm the one for you both. She rose and crossed to where he was bent and pointing into the display. She looked in and immediately knew the one he indicated. It was a plain band of white gold with a stone that matched the color of both sets of eyes gazing at it.

"Oh, Chakotay, he's right. It's perfect."

Chakotay came over to look too. He became as captivated as both Janeway's were. "It is perfect. It suits you."

"No, it suits us."

"This is a little unconventional for an engagement ring." The saleswoman was now standing behind the case containing the ring.

"All the better, our relationship has proven to be less than conventional." Kathryn said.

"What sort of stone is that?" Chakotay asked.

"This is a Neptune's Tear Diamond. It isn't like the regular white diamonds you find here on earth. It's a Bajoran jewel, and can be easily shaped to fit a set. I can have this stone type put in any set you want. If you'd just choose a set."

"We want this ring." Chakotay stated decisively. He looked over to Kathryn, who nodded fervently. The saleswoman tried for a few minutes more to get them to design a setting for a stone. Chakotay had grown more and more annoyed by the woman. He knew that she had to try for the more expensive sale, but he and Kathryn had made their decision. Finally, Owen had grown tired of her gimmicks as well and started to fidget and whine, and the saleswoman had given in. They left the store with Owen's discovery.

Chakotay suggested calling it quits for the moment on rings. They'd accomplished half of their goal and weren't likely to get lucky twice. They stopped at a toy store that Owen had spied and made up for the boring morning by letting him run around and look at all the neat toys. He left that store with a new toy Trebus and they went to find a restaurant for lunch. Chakotay held Kathryn's hand while they walked and ever-so-gently slipped the ring onto her finger, and pecked her cheek. She smiled through the tears in her eyes and he wrapped an arm around her waist not missing a step.

Chapter 43

The car came to a gentle stop at the curb in front of Tom and B'elanna's home. They were still in a temporary house that Admiral Paris owned. He insisted that the

couple could stay there as long as they liked, but they had already started looking

for a new place. The house was nice and the neighborhood was beautiful, but they

were too close to the Admiral. Tom wanted his independence from his parents and

as long as he lived in this house he'd never get it. Tom met them at the door with

Flotter in hand. "Welcome to the temporary Paris paradise."

"Yeah right Tom." Owen stated seizing Flotter and hugging the toy tight before

smiling up at the man who sported a boyish twinkle in his blue eyes. "Hi."

"Hi yourself, monster. It's about time you came for that thing. I thought you liked it so much you couldn't live without it."

"I do, but I had Mama and Chakotay to help me sleep." Tom looked up at his commanding officers sharply, and noted the clasped hands. "Is B'elanna inside?"

"Of course, come on in. She's back in the nursery." He stepped aside and allowed entry. Owen toed off his shoes and disappeared. "Captain," she found herself on the receiving end of his hug which she returned. "Old man," he shook Chakotay's hand as the door closed behind them.

They stood on a raised landing in a lavishly furnished den. Owen's discarded shoes sat askew by the door. Owen had disappeared down a hall on the opposite wall. To their left stood a bar separating the dinning/kitchen and the den. The old wood dinning table stood perpendicular to the bar, if an oval table can stand perpendicular to anything.

"Make yourselves at home." Tom offered, "if you would though leave your shoes

here. Tracks are murder on that white carpet. What Dad was thinking when he put

in white carpet escapes me. Kathryn and Chakotay used each other for balance as they took off their shoes and kicked them over by the pile where Owen's lay. Tom watched this as well. "B'e is changing the baby. I think more of Miral's lunch ended up on her than in her. She'll be out in a minute or two."

"This is a nice home, Tom." Kathryn observed looking around.

"It'll do for now." Tom agreed, "how about a tour?"

"Sure."

"Well, you've seen the kitchen, dining room and den. Down the hall there is the guest bathroom on the right, closet on the left. Down at the end is Miral's nursery

on the left and the guest room on the right. Through that door," he indicated a door on the opposite wall from the dinning area to the left of a handsome fireplace,

"is the master bedroom. There's a laundry off the kitchen and a door to the backyard in the laundry. They hadn't moved an inch from where they stood in the den the whole time.

"Nice tour Tom." Chakotay said demurely.

"Thanks, if you want a look," he made a sweeping gesture with his arm, "have

at it." He settled into a seat in the den.

"I think I will." Kathryn let her hand linger on Chakotay's for a moment before

heading to the hall, where she could hear Owen talking.

The baby's nursery was gaily decorated with the mix of her parents' different traditions. There was an open arch connecting the baby's room with Tom and B'elanna's. Miral's crib stood against the wall just inside the door for easy access at

night. The changing table was located at the end of the crib. B'elanna stood before

it, and Owen sat on a chair at the end talking to her as she worked. Kathryn could just make out a tiny pair of feet that kicked every-so-often.

"-into the other room so we could all fit." He must have caught sight of her movement for he turned and smiled at her. "Hi, Mama."

"Hey there, what are the three of you doing in here?" She walked over and

kissed the top of Owen's head.

"Changing a stinky diaper." He answered with his nose wrinkled in disgust.

"Hello, Captain." B'elanna said concentrating on the bundle in front of her.

"I'd offer some help, but it looks like you're done here."

"Yep, all done except disposal." She indicated the rolled and discarded diaper.

"That's my job." Owen said, "you have to carry Miral." He didn't wait for B'elanna or his Mama to answer to grab the diaper and disappear out the door. He liked to help even if he didn't like the crying.

Chapter 44

The air after Owen's departure was a little tense. Kathryn didn't know what Owen had said and B'elanna didn't know how Kathryn would react if she commented. Kathryn was a little worried about B'elanna's reaction to them. She knew that her treatment of Chakotay was a sore point with the younger woman. B'elanna didn't want to sound intrusive.

"So how much did that "little bird" tell you." Kathryn finally asked playing with

a tiny sensitive foot.

"Only that you had to move to a different room because yours was too small for

three people to sleep in the bed."

"I see, may I?" She indicated Miral.

"Of course, I'm surprised it's taken you this long to ask." She watched her captain lift her daughter into her arms and cradle her close to her breast. She then walked to sit in the rocker in front of the window.

"So, what's your verdict," She looked from daughter to mother, "thumbs up or thumbs down, as the Romans say." That was the opening that B'elanna had been looking for.

"It's about damn time you screwed your head on straight, Captain. You have no

idea how frustrating it was to watch two people whom you love and admire, who obviously love each other dance around a relationship for seven years. Seeing one who is ready to give love and share life waste it on the other who is too scared to reach out and save herself, but instead hides behind duty." She let that settle in and began again. Kathryn let her knowing she deserved all of it.

"We watched the two of you, Captain, and I didn't know whether to be angry at you or pity you or offer you a shoulder for comfort. Now, looking back, I wish I'd offered the shoulder. You were hurting enough without my hostility directed at you.

I'm sorry."

"Don't be, I deserved that anger, but not from you. He needed to be the one to express it to me. It was his right." She paused when Miral gurgled in her arms to coo back at her. "However, you and he are closer than family and I understand. I just want you to know that I'll spend the rest of his life making it up to him. I owe him a lot, and I love him." B'elanna was speechless at that moment. The woman before her was not known to admit so much in one sentence.

Kathryn gave her the time she needed and looked back down at the infant in her

arms. She grasped the tiny hand that had found it's way out of the blanket and was flailing against her. B'elanna was shocked her captain was apologizing, something that she'd never heard Kathryn Janeway do, even when she knew and admitted she was wrong. She hadn't known that Janeway was capable of such talk. Oh, she'd known that she could feel it, there was no other way to explain her attachment to her son or the cold determination that drove her to get her crew home, but to vocalize it, no.

"We thought you were afraid of getting too close, maybe of losing him." She stated finally.

"No, there is that fear, but fear alone has never stopped me before. I kept him at bay because I had a previous obligation and I couldn't sacrifice one for the other or vice versa, and I couldn't have both. So I waited until it was almost too late."

"What about when Owen appeared? You had both of them then."

"No, B'elanna, you remember the void. I would have left him with all of you and stayed there. Owen came second, a very close second that sometimes could be mistaken for first, but when it came down to it the ship took precedence. That's why I want to stay on Earth for a while. I owe him time too." Her voice had cracked at the last, and B'elanna thought that a change of subject would be good right now. The captain felt guilty enough for more than her actions toward the two people she loved most.

"I was so mad at Chakotay for that. I've made my peace with Seven, but she just isn't right for him." She came to kneel in front of Kathryn now, very serious. "You had given up hadn't you, that's why he wasn't present at Owen's trials."

"After I found out about Seven, yes. I accepted that I'd waited too long and that it was foolish to think he would wait until I was free to love him. I hoped he'd found happiness and took comfort knowing that I had my Owen. I refuse to think what might have happened if I hadn't had him."

"Or if he'd been taken away." B'elanna finished the thought for her. "That's why you looked so horrible, if you'd lost Owen you'd have lost everything."

"Yes," she nodded softly, "and somehow I've managed to regain it, and there is no way I'll let go now."

"Good, it's about time too." She reached up and squeezed Kathryn's upper arm.

For the first time one of her crew other than Chakotay was offering emotional support.

"Thank you `Lanna. You don't know how much I feared that you wouldn't approve."

"How could I not. He finally got what he wanted." Miral punctuated B'elanna's

statement with a sneeze.

"Bless you, precious." Kathryn smiled down at the infant. "Goodness what a yawn." It was B'elanna's turn to smile as she watched her captain coo and play with the baby. "You know sometimes I wish that I'd had Owen when he was this size, but I wouldn't trade him for the world."

"I couldn't have seen you with an infant, Captain. It was a stretch with Owen as a toddler. It took some getting used to. I guess none of us really saw you as a motherly type. You were the `captain.' you had to make all those decisions that no one else wanted to make."

"Oh, B'elanna the only difference between being a mother and a captain is the content. I still have to make the unpopular decisions and back them up, but with Owen it's usually over bedtime or holodeck programs he wanted to try, not whether we would fire on a ship or try diplomacy until they opened fire. In a way being a mother is harder. None of you had any disarming charms like Owen does. Except maybe Chakotay. Those-"

"-Dimples. I know, believe me." They both laughed at that.

"What about my dimples?" Chakotay poked his head in the door.

"They should be classified as deadly weapons." Kathryn shot at him.

"Kathryn, they already are." He shot back. "Are you two going to hide in here all afternoon. Hello B'ela."

"Hi, Old man." B'elanna stood and embraced him. "Congratulations."

"For what?" Kathryn raised her hand to show the ring. "Oh, thank you. You told her without me?"

"No, actually it was Owen."

"And I just left him in there alone with Tom."

"Oh well, it's no big secret anyway."

"True, now, are you going to hand over my Goddaughter or am I going to have to take her by force?"

"Why be difficult? Here," She offered the infant, "be gentle, sir."

"Yes ma'am." He stooped and accepted Miral with a grin. "Let's get back out there."

"Way ahead of you big guy." B'elanna called back she and Kathryn were already

halfway down the hall. Chakotay didn't mind he was totally enamored of the tiny girl in his arms. He stood there for a few minutes just watching her doze. When he snapped out of his trance he kissed the soft ridges on her forehead and followed the ladies. Tom had a smug look on his face when Chakotay joined them in the den.

"So you got the whole story from him did you." Kathryn was saying.

"Yep, including something about marriage." Tom's grin made Chakotay want to hit him on principle.

"Married," B'elanna said softly, "when?"

"Soon, we haven't set a date or anything, but soon." Chakotay took a seat beside Kathryn and Owen. Kathryn just smiled and pulled Owen closer for a hug.

"Congratulations, both of you." Tom said all banter gone now. "I will be the first to admit that we thought you were together on-board at first, but had a falling out or something. It's good to know you are really getting together now, and I'm sorry for the few childish attempts to push you both closer. We just wanted to see you happy." He smiled ruefully.

"Thank you, Paris, we never could prove it was you all those times. You've confirmed it for us now though, and I have it from a reliable source that pay-backs

are hell."

"I'll be sure to watch my back."

"I told you all those tricks were pointless, Tom."

"Don't you pretend that you didn't help B'e." Tom seated himself beside his wife. He studied Kathryn, Chakotay, Owen and Miral for a moment and his trademark twinkle flashed. "Look B'e they're a cute little family over there." He teased as was his nature.

"Watch it Mr. Paris, we may not be on Voyager, but I'm still the Captain."

"Yes ma'am." He flashed a toothy grin. Owen rolled his eyes getting restless.

"Tom, may I go play your game?"

"Sure, Owen. You know where it is, and where to go on the terminal. Have at it." Owen nodded kissed his mama on the cheek and bolted into B'elanna and Tom's room before she could protest.

"How has Owen been?" B'elanna asked abruptly.

"Pretty well, Mom said that he had nightmares while he was here. He's only had

one since we've been in Indiana, but then he's been sleeping with us."

Tom chose not to comment on her usage of us. "Voyager disappearing or about

the hearing?"

"Voyager disappearing. He's had nightmares about the hearing?" She looked worried.

"I'll say, those were the worst." Tom answered.

"I slept with him on those nights." B'elanna continued. "He told me about it before he went back to sleep one night. He said that Neychev pulled him from your arms and they locked him away in a brig. He said when he asked to see us we shunned him like we didn't want him anymore."

Chakotay looked up from Miral at this, "he said something like that at the banquet. He was afraid to meet your mother and sister. He was worried that they wouldn't want to meet him because of the trial."

"My poor Owen. That damn fool woman. Neychev was the only one that dared to say anything that might have undermined his sense of belonging. I swear I want

to hit her so much." She was fuming now.

"It's all right, Kathryn, I had a talk with him and I think that we've side stepped any more problems with that."

"I hope so. I wish that they'd have let me keep him out of the courtroom. Owen, Admiral Owen, fought them over it, but they wouldn't relent. Thank you for talking with him. He always seems to take things better when they come from you. I hope he wasn't too much trouble." She looked back to B'elanna and Tom.

"Never. He's a delight to have around. I admit that I miss him more than Voyager itself. I just felt so bad that he was having nightmares."

"Did he mention anything about The Admiral?" Chakotay asked.

"No, not directly. Though she certainly made an impression there. Why?"

"Just curious. He woke me up a couple nights ago to ask about her. He'd had a

dream and she was in it. Nothing bad, but he wondered some things." Chakotay was clearly reluctant to talk about a confidence.

"Why didn't you wake me?" Kathryn was curious and wondered what Owen would have asked.

"He asked me not to. In his words, `Mommy gets all stiff when she hears about her or when they were in a room together.' I swear if anyone can read you, Kathryn, it's that little kid in there."

She smiled proudly, "oh, like a book, Chakotay, like a book. That was part of the problem at the trial. I was under a lot of stress and he was feeding on that and it was that much harder on him." She was silent for a moment. "Speaking of my renegade older self, what did you all think of her? Was she as much of a pain as I found her, at first."

"I thought she was amazing in engineering. She knew the warpcore almost better than I did. She merged flawlessly after the initial shock wore off."

"She was one hell of a sparring partner, I'll tell you that. She stayed a jab ahead of me the whole time."

"Like that's anything new Tom." B'elanna threw in.

"She's got you there Tom, but I agree, she kept me on my toes too." Kathryn added.

Chakotay was solemn and quiet when he answered. "I felt for her. The first night she was aboard she let herself into my quarters. I found her standing in my living room watching the stars out the view ports." Chakotay lay his sleeping goddaughter lengthwise on his thighs. Her tiny fists rested beside her head on his knees, and he began to tell them what he'd found in his quarters that evening.

_*I must have missed this. I certainly don't remember it.*_

Chapter 45

After the day he'd had Chakotay was exhausted, he wanted nothing more than to have a light meal and read reports until he fell asleep at his desk. He really had no preference where he fell asleep after seven years of constant duty, so long as he slept, be it in a bed on the couch or at his desk, he didn't care. He could live with the resulting aches and pains without complaint.

On this night when he wanted nothing more that a little food and a lot of rest he entered his quarters and immediately his ears picked up on an unfamiliar sound. He recognized it sub-consciously as weeping, but he was so accustomed to the sound of silence when he entered that it took his conscious mind a little time to catch up. The engines and occasionally Owen's laughter or tantrums could be heard but always muffled coming from without. This weeping was from within and he had no idea how to react to it.

The figure standing in front of his viewports, with her arms wrapped protectively around herself; her hair a stark white in the light of the stars at which she gazed in her misery was a bigger shock than the sounds she made. He was confused by her presence and even more so by her tears. He just stood there with his arm halfway to tossing the PADDs on his desk. If she'd heard him enter she didn't acknowledge him and being Kathryn, younger or older, he knew she didn't like to cry or show weakness in any form in front of others, and that he had to make her aware of his presence.

"Admiral."

"Kathryn, and good evening to you, Chakotay." She turned and he was startled yet again when she made no move to hide her tears. "Would it be too much hassle for you to listen to the woes of an old woman in desperate need of a friend?"

"Never. I was just going to replicate dinner, would you like something?"

"No, I've just had my fill next door. That's why I'm feeling so lost partly. I thought I would be okay, when I was contemplating doing this, and even after it started I thought I'd be okay, but I still miss him so much. I can still see him the day my life was destroyed."

Chakotay knew she was speaking of her own Owen and moved to stand near at hand, in case she needed him. It was a reflex with Kathryn, he needed to be by her side. Chakotay didn't say anything, allowing her to speak at her leisure.

"And now I'm here and he's back to the little boy I love so boundlessly. My little Owen. Yet, he's not. I try to distinguish between them, like with the Seven I knew and the Seven I see here, or you now, and the friend I so desperately wish I could talk to, yet know even if I were home it would be impossible. I miss you as surely as I miss my son, Chakotay." Now he did reach out and put a gentle hand on her shoulder.

"Kathryn, what is it between us that we don't even speak." He hoped that it wasn't Seven, but feared that it might be. She allayed his fear when she turned to him.

"Death, Chakotay, I've been alone for six months now." The look on her face was indescribable except for the loneliness he saw there.

"Kathryn, I'm sorry." He didn't know what else to say, what could be said in this situation, so he squeezed her shoulder softly. He was, yet again, startled when she closed the distance between them and let her head fall to his chest while wrapping her arms around him.

"It's not your fault. Your death was something of a blessing, all things considered. You'd been miserable for a very long time. Not really ill, but just empty. So much loss." She fell silent then and didn't attempt to continue as her tears fell again. His arms came to hug her instinctively, after a few moments she composed herself, "and though I tried to help you I was too late. I'd thrown away the only thing besides my son that I really cared about, and even that was eventually taken from me."

"Is that why you came here?" He meant his future fate, but she went another direction with his question while still answering the original meaning.

"Partly, yes, for Owen. If you all get home now, Starfleet will have a much harder time being cold and calculating to a small child. She might succeed with her Owen so young and be able to keep her son when I lost mine."

"Starfleet took him?" Chakotay was shocked, even though he knew how clones were viewed.

"No, they didn't take him, they killed him. Starfleet believes that clones are a danger to the balance of all things in existence. I fought them we all did, but we lost, and he was destroyed." She fell silent again for a moment and her expression twisted as though in physical pain. "It was all very humane. He sat on a biobed and they gave him a hypospray, then he lay back and I watched my baby fall asleep. I lost him."

"I can imagine your reaction to that." His frame of reference was wide where Kathryn and losing Owen was concerned, or so he thought.

"No you can't. You have seen just the tip of how deep her love for that child runs. I watched him grow up, and helped him learn about life, I held him after the first love of his life crushed his heart. You think she loves that boy now, you watch

while he grows. There is a bond there that is more than that of a mother and a son. It's unique in this life, but the closest you'd come to defining that bond is that of mother and child. It's more intense than that somehow. I'd have given everything to stop what happened. I'd have betrayed everything that I held so highly in my life. I'd have betrayed any friend of any consequence to keep my son, and so would she if she were faced with that prospect." She stepped away from him agitated. He missed her suddenly, and was puzzled by the feeling. "If I hadn't already been an admiral at that point they would have dismissed me. As it is I spent quite a lot of time with counselors, but none of them helped. Only one person pulled me back from the hell I dwelt in and made me go on, and that was in revenge for me doing the same to him years earlier. He understood me completely, and got me back on my feet and kept me there. That was ten years ago, Chakotay, and until six months ago when you died we didn't go more than a day with out seeing or speaking to one another."

"Oh, Kathryn." His voice was a mere whisper the ache that he'd felt when Owen had been poisoned had come and gone with other trials over that last couple years,

but now it was almost unbearable.

"I don't think I can take it anymore." Admiral Janeway closed her eyes and decided that her Harry had been right. She wasn't thinking with an unclouded mind, she was acting out of loss and being driven by grief. Yet it was all she had left. Pain and determination were very powerful emotions to have driving you. The battle that raged constantly between them was unbearable though and she was being slowly destroyed by it. For the most part her determination was the stronger of the two, but there were times when the pain took over. When the pain reared its head it consumed her as it had when she'd excused herself from her former quarters earlier that night.

Chakotay needed to do something to help her, in essence she was the same as the woman he could hear through the bulkhead even now. In some tiny part of his brain he knew the sounds were being made while Owen had his bath for the evening, but that part was so small and the rest of him was crying out to help the one before him.

"Kathryn, I'm here, let me help you. I may not be the same as your Chakotay, but I can help you in whatever way you'll let me." He dipped his head to catch her eye. "I can listen, talk, or I can just be there for you to cry with." This was fast becoming bizarre, this was Kathryn yet it wasn't. He loved her and wanted to take her pain, but was involved with another. He was thoroughly confused and let his mind catch up and get comfortable by simply following his instincts. He enfolded this older incarnation of his soul in his arms and held her tightly.

She broke down then and he raised a hand to stroke the steel gray hair under his chin. She still smelled like Kathryn which was oddly surprising. He indulged and let his face rest on her head as she heaved with sobs. "I must not have been too much help if it still hurts you like this."

"You can't take someone else's pain when you're consumed yourself. Chakotay, we failed miserably to help each other in that area. All we could do was be there for one another to make sure that the pain didn't win." After that they fell silent and eventually they moved to the couch, and Chakotay held her there. No other words were spoken.

Chapter 46

"I woke up there and she'd gone." Chakotay finished his tale. He looked down at his Kathryn with her head resting on his shoulder. "As I sat there holding your future, I vowed to myself that I wouldn't let you end up that way. It tore me apart inside to see your pain. I think it was then that I realized that whatever Seven and I had it could never work. The Admiral's actions confused and frightened me that night, more so than when she looked at me so oddly that morning."

"That was why she held him so tightly at lunch then. It must have been like seeing a ghost. Worse she had to be around all the people she had accepted as dead. It's scary to think that would have been me." She shivered at the thought and Chakotay slipped an arm around her to rub her shoulder in comfort. "She scared Owen at first. He didn't know she and I were the same person, I didn't know how to explain it to him where he'd understand, though I did try after she'd left. She had called him `my little fox,' I told him that it was my special name for him. It scared him he didn't know that she knew the name, and when she said it he pulled away from her. She must have been crushed." Kathryn's hand came up to hold Chakotay's where it was on her shoulder.

"A lot of the crew got a weird feeling from her the first time they saw her." Tom said solemnly.

"She lost a lot of people Tom. I bet every one of the crew that got that feeling were the ones she lost." Kathryn answered. Their conversation continued on this track for a time while they remembered and thanked their futuristic savior once more. They moved on to reminiscing about events on Voyager for a time. Eventually, late in the afternoon, Owen reappeared looking drowsy, to sit in his Mama's lap. He joined their talk for a while but ended up sleeping in Kathryn's arms. By this time the conversation had turned to their future plans. Tom and B'elanna had stayed in Starfleet only under the assurance that they'd be able to stay together at work and home whether it was on a ship, a colony, or here on earth.

"They're looking for someone to design a new class of ship." Tom was saying as B'elanna returned from the kitchen with a bottle for Miral. She accepted the baby from Chakotay and returned to Tom's side to feed her daughter.

"That sounds perfect for you both. The Flier is proof that you are good at what you do. They'd be crazy to turn you away." Chakotay said getting more comfortable on the couch so that he could hold Kathryn closer.

"Well, we have to apply first. We were kinda waiting to see what the two of you would do about Voyager. Because if you're going back out whether on Voyager or another ship we want to be there." B'elanna said a little shyly.

"Almost the whole crew is waiting to see what you'll do. They're taking this time to try new things sure, but the moment you announce you're going back out, they'd drop the new projects and join back up, but they want to remain a crew." Tom added watching his commanding officer's faces. Chakotay had known about this, Tom had spoken of it while Kathryn had been speaking with B'elanna earlier.

"I was planning on staying planet-side for a while. I'm tired of putting duty ahead of Owen and myself. I want to simply be mommy for a while, not Captain. The only way I'd be going back out is if I got a larger ship where my family could go with me. Voyager still just isn't big enough for that."

B'elanna's eyes lit up at this. "It could be. She's going into dry dock for a while for repairs, and we could do a complete overhaul and refit her to our liking while we're at it. Make her a family ship, I know for a fact that over three-fourths of the crew would rather stay with her than have to readjust to a new ship and crew. We like where we are. More importantly we like what we are together, family."

"What about Chakotay and me? Our relationship would violate regs, they'd split us up and I don't want that. They'd never let him be my first officer if we were married. I could fight them for it, but after the trial, I don't think their going to be too understanding.

Tom spoke up here, "Dad said that Neychev was the only one that strictly opposed Owen, and she's a hag anyway. The others were open-minded but wanted to see for themselves, and they did have to follow procedure."

"Kathryn, remember what Crusher said? They want you back and badly enough that they'd consent to anything if you were adamant that it was the only way you'd return. I've spoken to a few people myself, and since the war Starfleet is short on well trained and tried captains. Too many of the officers holding the position now are fresh from command school, and in charge of ships that until they were available were being captained by field promoted commanders."

"If that's really true, then they would be crazy to let you remain as my first officer. You're as qualified to captain as I am, and you've commanded your own ship before."

"True, but I've already refused their offer. I don't want another ship. Voyager is home, and I won't go out on any other ship. I'm not saying jump on it now. We have time. We make a few inquiries and like B'e said Voyager will be out of commission for a while. We look into this discuss it with Admiral Paris for starters. In the mean time, we follow through on the wedding, getting a house. It can't hurt to look into it though. It's just another job to consider."

"Going back out on Voyager would make Owen's day. He didn't want to stay on earth in the first place. He hates it here."

"That's not true and you know it, Kathryn. He's just homesick. He hasn't complained where I've heard him." Chakotay admonished. Kathryn smiled at him then turned serious again.

"If we do this we would have to have full control of the refit. I don't want some stranger that is fresh from training cutting up my ship. We'll need free reign to design it how we want it. We'd need to find a house close by so that we could beam directly to the dock to work on her."

"We've already got two or three prospects right now, Kathryn. They may be a little extravagant for our tastes, but I think we'll survive that. We could go look at them now if you wanted. Owen can start school there at Starfleet HQ. He'd be close to us if we were needed. This could work Kathryn, all we have to do is get Starfleet to agree with us."

"What about our vacation, Chakotay? I thought we were taking some time off from the action." She turned to look directly at him.

"I wouldn't mind a little action, Kathryn, just not the Delta Quadrant equivalent. In the well explored Alpha Quadrant action has a different meaning." He winked at her.

"True, am I really letting the three of you talk me into this?" Captain Janeway looked between the three officers sitting with her.

"It's a good idea Kathryn. At least for now, Starfleet needs all the help they can get. They have all the capable ships in the fleet patrolling our borders. What if we took an idea for a mission of mercy to the admiralty? A ship that will go out to the refugees and the damaged worlds to help them rebuild."

"A ship of good will." She thought silently for a moment. "I like the sound of that. If we present it right the admiralty might go for it. Let's do it. I'll contact Owen in the morning to set up a meeting and we can take a look at the houses on our list so far. As soon as we find one we can start moving in. Where we stay in the meantime it's up to you, I'm happy at Mom's, but Owen and I could move in with you in quarters-" Chakotay put a finger on her lips to silence her.

"Slow down Kathryn, one thing at a time. We'll look at the houses tomorrow and if your mother won't mind me we'll stay with her, my quarters are smaller that the crew cabins on voyager, the three of us won't fit."

"Sounds like a plan, Let's keep this quiet though. I don't want to get anyone's hopes up and then have them fall through." Her hand was stroking Owen's hair as she said this, and the others understood that she wasn't talking about the crew at all.

Chapter 47

The next day found them in the midst of chaos. Kathryn was blind-sided when the requested meeting was set for that afternoon and that left only the morning to try and refine their idea. Chakotay and Kathryn finally decided that since it was informal finesse was less important than getting the idea out there. This left free time to tour a few houses They toured a few and none were satisfactory the first was too far from HQ and the second was a bit small for their liking, the third was much too large and the fourth was in disrepair. By the fifth house they were tired of looking and it was time for the meeting.

Kathryn drove them to Admiral Paris's home and they found themselves faced with half of Starfleet's admiralty. Owen Paris and his family were celebrating Tom's return unofficially, and he'd invited old family friends that just happened to be on the admiralty board with him. So, Chakotay and Kathryn were understandably nervous to be pitching this idea.

Kathryn was thankful, however that Tom and B'elanna were present. She left Owen with them while she and Chakotay spoke with Paris. He greeted them less than formally and showed them into his office.

"Have a seat and lets hear this idea Kathryn, then you can join us for the cook out." The other three admirals settled around on small couches that were placed in the room for just such a meeting. "I hope you don't mind that I included these others. I thought that it might be a better preliminary if you got more than just my opinion."

"So, how much did Tom tell you?" Kathryn answered.

"Enough that I knew it would be better if others heard it too. It is a sound idea but explain it to us." He smiled knowingly and sat behind his desk.

The next two hours were spent outlining the ideas they'd talked over the afternoon before and making it clear that if one thing was vetoed then the whole thing was off. Especially where families on Voyager and where a Command relationship were concerned. Paris seemed to like it and the others looked intrigued.

"A family ship to help the hardest hit colonies and worlds. A ship that can not be used for deliberate battles. Voyagers weapons could be retained, but for defense purposes only." Paris was saying as his wife brought in drinks for them all. "That could build bridges between the worlds that supported the Maquis and Starfleet. Having Chakotay and the other Voyager Maquis on this mission would be a sign of goodwill toward the Maquis and it's support. Worlds like Bajor who were hit hardest still hold animosity that we didn't do something sooner."

Another of the admirals stepped in. "They were the biggest faction of Maquis and when they were killed Bajor took it hard. This mission, if it were launched, would be Starfleet saying `we screwed up, but we aren't going to turn our backs again."

"It will be hard to sell this to the others though." Spoke another Admiral. "The mission itself will be approved quickly I'm sure, but certain Admirals may object to the command team being romantically involved. Still that could be part of the hype of the tour. Starfleet sends a family to help other families, you might be able to sell that, but I don't envy you at all."

"If we had to we'd hide the fact that we were married from these certain admirals until it was too late to do anything about it." Chakotay spoke before Kathryn could. "We wouldn't like it, but we'd survive it as long as we get to work together. You've all seen the reports from Voyager, I don't think that anyone could miss how in love we were out there, and we still worked well together."

"If you two pitch this to the rest like that I don't see how they could say no." Paris said in hopes of winding the meeting down. "When are you planning on talking to them?"

"As soon as may be possible, Owen. We want to get the go ahead or shot down as soon as possible so that we can move forward whether it's to refit Voyager or to find new jobs. Neither Chakotay or I want more active combat. We want to finally be together and possibly have a family."

"I'll set the appropriate meetings for as soon as I can then. In the mean time, are the two of you married now?" He asked with a twinkle in his eye.

Kathryn glanced at Chakotay and he nodded. "Not yet, but we'd like to be before the meetings about Voyager. We want to present a front that says either you take both or you get none. We aren't kidding about wanting to be together, and we want to be able to follow through with our statements honestly, by showing that what Chakotay and I have is forever and we won't be apart. We've wasted enough time already."

"All right, two weeks, how's that?"

"Better make it three, we need to find a house and move in. I'm going to need time to start Owen in school too."

"Plus I'd like a short honeymoon at least." Chakotay added.

"Okay three weeks, get to it, but for now come eat and enjoy being home." Owen stated as the others stood and filed out. Kathryn and Chakotay held back a moment, "was there something else?"

"Yes, we'd like you to marry us." Chakotay said. "Not today, but as soon as may be possible."

"I'd be honored." Paris beamed. They worked out that they'd get married a few days after finding the house and then joined the others out in the spacious back yard of Admiral Paris's home.

Chapter 48

The next three day's were spent transporting between Gretchen Janeway's home and San Francisco where they searched almost desperately for a suitable house. Most were too fancy for either of them and others just didn't sit right. They'd come to the point, after three days of nothing, to throwing in the towel and staying in Chakotay's on base quarters. Until they were contacted by Kathryn's old academy roommate, Lettie Garrett, who'd been trying to get in touch with her since she'd heard of Voyager's return, but at first had been out of contact and then couldn't find her.

She'd offered the use of her vacation home there in San Francisco. She was getting ready to sell anyway and they may as well take a look. They found that it was a bit large for them but that it didn't hold the same feeling of awkwardness that the other houses had, and decided that this would do until they knew for sure that Voyager's refit would be taking place at the space dock here, or at Utopia Planitia's ship yard.

What sold them on this house finally was the quaint look of it. It was clearly two story, and more along the lines of her mother's home than the sleek new buildings of the twenty-fourth century. Kathryn found herself amused by the thought that everything she had hated about her home as a child she was drawn to now. She'd always wanted to live in a house that fit more with the look of the twenty-fourth century and now she wanted the comfort that the antiquated twenty-first and second centuries conveyed for her family.

The house lay on a quarter acre of land, a luxury in the area in and around San Francisco. Kathryn was glad for this luxury it would give Owen a proper yard to play in. The house itself was 900 square foot and was comprised of two stories. The first floor held the kitchen, dining, living rooms, a guest lavatory, a spacious office and a small coat closet in the entry. The second floor was made up of five bedrooms, two bath, and a smaller office.

They'd ironed out the details with Lettie on a possibly temporary arrangement, and begun the strain of moving them in. They'd enlisted Tom and B'elanna's help, and welcomed Harry Kim into the fold when he turned up on the second and last day of the move. They'd started with small furniture and clothing, and this day had

moved the larger furniture. There was a fair bit of room in the house, but the way the furniture was placed took up some of that space. The smaller office upstairs was to be Chakotay's meditation room, and one of the spare bedrooms was to be a playroom for Owen. A place where he could create mayhem and chaos and not worry about getting into trouble for making a mess of things so long as it was cleaned up afterward.

Now in the cool of late evening most of the furniture was in place, just the way Kathryn wanted it, and the only thing left was to unpack the small decorative items and toys and such. They'd reached a consensus that such things could wait until they knew for sure they were staying in this house, and the group of movers had been fed and were settled in the living room in exhausted conversation. The discussion consisted of their impending presentation for the Admiralty. Although, some of the group were too tired to participate intelligibly. Tom was stretched out face down on the floor and B'elanna was massaging the knots out of his lower back while Harry played with Miral, the little girl was starting to become more animated.

Kathryn lounged on one end of their larger couch with Chakotay spread out along the length of it with his head resting in her lap. Owen, already asleep for he'd worked as hard as the others, draped along Chakotay's torso. B'elanna and Kathryn were already discussing the changes they wanted to make in the crew quarters to accommodate families. Harry was keeping with the conversation but only occasionally offered comment. Tom even added a comment here and there, but Chakotay, with Kathryn running her fingers through his thick, dark hair and occasionally tracing the lines of his tattoo, was fading fast. Harry was making a concerted effort not to watch the command team too closely for too long. He was still getting used to their open displays of affection.

During one of the brief, but comfortable, lulls in the conversation Harry noticed an unpleasant odor. "Uh oh, ah, B'elanna. I think Miral needs your mothering touch."

"Already, I just changed her a little while ago."

"And I'll bet that was mostly inoffensive." Harry had his nose screwed up, and Kathryn laughed at his discomfort.

"At ease, Harry, I'll take care of the baby." She tried to ease out from under Chakotay's head, but he still woke from his doze.

"Where do you think you're going, and depriving me of my pillow." He asked playfully.

"Diaper duty, want to help?" She looked back as she lifted little Miral out of Harry's arms.

"Love to, what time is it, anyway?" Harry answered this one.

"2200 hours." Chakotay nodded and sat up gingerly so Owen wouldn't be disturbed.

"Well, I should get Owen to bed then." He stood and started for the stairs.

"I'll be up in a minute to say goodnight. Make sure Flotter is in the bed, it should be there already, but..."

"I know I'll take care of it." Kathryn nodded and she disappeared into the bathroom with the baby and the diaper bag.

Chakotay carried Owen up the stairs and down the left hall at the top to his room. Just beyond Owen's room at the end, the door to his and Kathryn's own room stood open. Chakotay pulled back the covers and lay Owen into bed. He didn't remember Owen changing into pajamas, but he had and hardly stirred as Chakotay tugged the covers up around him. He turned looking around the room for Flotter and found the toy laying discarded on the desk in front of the room's sole window. He retrieved the blue confection and returned to the boy's bedside. He tucked Flotter in with Owen and bent to kiss the smooth forehead goodnight.

"Where's Mama?" Came a drowsy inquiry as the small arms latched onto Flotter.

"She's downstairs changing Miral's diaper. She'll be up in a bit to say goodnight. Would you like a story while we wait.?"

"Okay." Chakotay sat and began his tale. Owen reached over and held the large tan hand while he listened and drifted back into sleep. After Chakotay was sure the boy would be all right he turned out the lights making sure that the night-light was incandescently shining, and made his way into his own room. He changed into a comfortable t-shirt and pair of sweat pants. He met Kathryn in the hall as she was leaving Owen's room, and they descended together.

Tom was now dozing on the floor and B'elanna was seated on the couch holding her daughter and conversing quietly with Harry. Both looked up as Kathryn and Chakotay returned. "I hate to break up the party, but if helmboy is any indication we should get going."

"It is late isn't it?" Kathryn stated. "Thanks for the help, and we'll contact you when we decide on a day for the ceremony. Keep thinking about the refit, I will too, and maybe by the time we get approval the only thing we'll have left is to present the plan." B'elanna was standing now and Kathryn embraced her and kissed little Miral softly. Harry and Chakotay woke Tom and got him on his feet. They shook hands and gave hugs to their captain and took their leave.

"See ya soon." Tom said as they walked out.

"Drive safely, Mr. Paris." Kathryn replied.

"I don't think that'll be a problem. B'e is driving tonight." Chakotay and Kathryn walked them out waved a last time and returned to the warmth of their home.

"Computer, secure doors and turn off interior lights." Chakotay commanded as they retreated upstairs.

"Mama?" Owen called softly from the end of the hall.

"Uh oh," Kathryn said. "I'll join you shortly." She kissed him softly in parting and peeled off to enter Owen's room. "What is it, little fox?"

"I need a drink and a little music again." He said heavily with a yawn.

"Okay, here's your water, my angel." She sat on the bed and handed him the glass from his night stand. "And I've got a special program for you to sleep with tonight. Tom helped me install it this afternoon. Want to give it a try?"

"Okay."

"Computer run audio, Owen's home zero-one." The computer beeped its acknowledgment, and the sounds of Voyager at warp permeated the room.

"It's my home, Mama." Owen sounded awed even through his sleepiness.

"Yes it is, my love. Tom got a recording last week while he took Voyager out for Starfleet to check her performance. Now no matter where you are, you can hear the engines like you did there." She watched Owen for a moment as he drifted into an easy sleep once more, and took the half-empty cup from his hands. "Your drink is on the stand beside you, baby, sleep well."

"Night, Mama." She kissed him softly and pulled the covers up to his chin as he rolled onto his side and cuddled Flotter. His breathing was already the same she associated with his peaceful sleep. Kathryn left his room again and entered hers.

Chakotay was already on his side of the bed dozing atop the covers with a PADD

in one hand and his ankles crossed comfortably. She walked over and gently pulled

the PADD out of his hand. "Hey, love, get into bed properly, I'll be back after I change into my night gown." He opened dark eyes and smiled at her. Then took her face in his hands and pulled her closer to kiss her thoroughly.

"Okay, I'll be waiting." He said when he released her. She pecked his lips again and went to change. She wasn't long in the bathroom, so when she returned to find him under the covers with his back to her she wondered if he were really asleep, or if he had decided he wanted to play a little. Kathryn watched for a moment and noted his breathing was erratic for someone supposedly sleeping.

Chapter 49

Kathryn crawled in behind him and slid over until her body made contact with his. She propped herself up on an elbow, feeling the slight shiver of his body as she did. Smiling she kissed the skin just behind and below his ear and was rewarded with a strangled gasp. "Are you asleep, love?" She slid her free hand around his bare torso just to feel his silken skin.

"Not after that." His hand seized hers and raised it to his lips. This time she gasped as his tongue traced the lines of her palm.

"Good, I seem to remember making a promise about a week ago that we couldn't follow through on." Her normally sensual tone had lowered to down right sultry, "want to cash in on it?" He gasped again when she kissed the center of his back.

"Love to." His voice had deepened with desire while her own tongue traced the curve of his ear. "Spirits, woman, what you do to me with a single gesture."

"Really?" He felt her hand below the covers skim down his chest and dance over his waist to then trace the beginnings of his erection. They both felt him jerk into her hand. "I guess so." Again her voice had lowered to a more arousing tone and she kissed his neck again.

He quickly turned to face her unable to take anymore of her teasing. "I love you, Kathryn."

"Show me." Her voice had transformed from arousing to breathy and that in itself was more arousing that the earlier seductive tone. He found himself growing harder just from that change.

"Computer, privacy lock on the master bedroom door, and dim lights to one-third." He called and rolled her onto her back, kissing her deeply as he settled over her stroking her tongue with his own. She let out a humming sigh into his mouth, and arched against him when his palms found her breasts. He was overwhelmed with the love he held for her and kissed her still more passionately. His dreams were nothing compared to actually having his Kathryn in his arms, moaning under his ministrations, and shivering with her desire.

After seven years of longing, both had envisioned their first joining to be furiously intense, but ultimately short, though they hoped that it would be something touching and special. Both were then surprised when the passion and lust fell to the background and their loving was gentle and slow, yet as intense as they'd thought it would be. A constant over the years had been the games of eye-tag they'd played, it manifested once again now as they explored once forbidden motions and actions.

The ease with which they came together was something of a surprise as well. They'd seen each other unclothed and lived together for seven years, but they'd never had more physical contact than that of a caress of the hand or the occasional backrub. Now when they should be struggling to learn to please one another they found that it was almost as if they'd been lovers all along. Instinctively, almost, they knew what to do to prolong their pleasure, and which zones of each other's bodies were the most erogenous. The frenzied pace never came and when they reached their pinnacle it was to a rhythm that had Chakotay hardly moving at all, within Kathryn's womb.

The seven years of passion between them culminated in the most overwhelming orgasm either had ever hoped to experience. It crashed over and over them like the tides upon the shore, and throughout it all they held each other tightly knowing that the emotions would soon overtake them. Their passion was mostly silent too, the familiarity that they found coming together made words unnecessary a sigh worked as well as a scream and the only thing either of them intoned, the other's name, was done so in a whisper.

When Kathryn regained her senses she found that this had been the most poignant moment in her life. He was still heavily pressing her into the mattress and regaining his strength, or so she supposed, until she felt his tears on her neck. The emotions had been too much for him after yearning for her for so long. All the love, longing, frustration, anger and every other emotion she'd caused in him over the last seven years broke upon him like the flood waters on an overtaxed dam.

She held him tightly to her as the emotions began to overpower her too. She felt once again guilt, sorrow, determination that had kept them apart, and overshadowing everything, the deepest most boundless love she'd ever felt for another. Their tears were as much a part of this night as their coupling had been, for the tears released all the feelings that were of the past, and would allow them to move forward without a need to look back at the hard times in the Delta Quadrant.

He pulled away after the tears had purged themselves and looked upon her wet face. "I'm sorry for that."

"You shouldn't be. It was bound to happen. The emotion and history between us wouldn't allow for anything less than tears in release." She kissed him luxuriously. "I love you, so much, and this is the only way I know to deal with the intensity that I feel at finally being with you truly. I think that it's much the same for you." He nodded and moved to roll off of her. Kathryn wrapped her legs around him quickly. "Don't you dare even think of leaving me after the most profound moments in my life.

"Aren't I getting a little heavy?" He smiled softly down at her.

"I like it, makes me feel safe and protected. I used to love this feeling as a child, and while we were out there I got used to the fact that it was my turn to give others that feeling at the expense of my own security. I'd like to feel protected for once."

"Then I'll stay." He lowered himself back onto her and she ran her fingers through his hair. "Incidentally, Kathryn, thank you." Chakotay said softly beside her ear.

"What for?" Her hands caressed down his back and up again into his hair.

"Everything. Tonight, getting us home, loving me, just everything that you've given me. Owen. I really do adore that kid of yours."

"You're welcome. He's yours too you know. He always has been, and it really should be me thanking you. You continued to love me even when I was at my worst, and when I hurt you or used you...Gods I'm so sorry."

"My Kathryn," he dipped his head and kissed the skin between her breasts, "I love you. Marry me, before we start fighting for Voyager. As soon as we can, now if we can rouse all the right people."

"In a couple of days, we've done everything that we can and I'll let the others get their rest. We need time to contact everyone. Admiral Owen will be free at a moment's notice and I'd like our Owen to be part of the process, I want to let my mother know, and I'd like to have Tuvok there."

"So that's a yes."

"Of course, why would I say anything else. You complete me, Chakotay." At these words tears again glistened in his eyes. "Sleep, Angry Warrior, we're going to be very busy over the next few days. I'm not going anywhere." He did as she said and closed his eyes while still pressing her into the mattress with his weight and joined as they were. Eventually she slept as well, and some where in there they separated and Kathryn woke later with Chakotay's face between her breasts, still deeply asleep.

The dawn found them amidst another bout of lovemaking, and then they slept again before the alarm went off at 0800. They came together again in their shared shower, and decided that they'd better dress themselves rather that help one another. Chakotay was done sooner and went to wake Owen. He needn't have worried, Owen was downstairs already reading the morning funnies in his pajamas. Chakotay started the coffee and breakfast while waiting for Kathryn to join them. Owen abandoned the comics for Chakotay's company.

He found himself lifted off the floor and placed on the counter to watch Chakotay prepare the meal. Kathryn joined them presently and kissed her Owen on the bridge of his nose. "Good morning, my Owen, how did you sleep?"

"Very well, no bad dreams." He held onto her neck when she straightened and was pulled into her arms.

"I'm glad. Chakotay and I talked about some things last night, and I want to talk to you now."

"What?" Owen's head cocked to one side and looked inquisitive.

Kathryn walked over to the table and sat placing Owen in her lap. "Remember how we told you we want to get married sometime." He nodded. "Well, we want to get married within the next few days. What do you think about that?"

"I think if you want to you should. It doesn't matter what I think."

"Yes it does, my angel, you're a part of our family. We want you to be happy too." She knew that Chakotay could hear them, but he wanted her to have the time with Owen and not interfere.

"I am happy. You're here and I'll get to see Chakotay everyday and all the time.

That makes me happy, Mama. I was afraid that I wouldn't see him anymore and now it's just like at home. But, how would being married make it different?" This last was said with a little trepidation. He was afraid of something.

"It will mean that you'll have a Mama and a daddy, nothing bad." She took a guess at his fear. "We won't let anything bad happen."

"Good. Every time something gets different it's bad lately."

"I know, little man," Chakotay brought Kathryn a cup of coffee, "it's been a rough few weeks for you hasn't it." He got a nod in return and reached down to kiss the auburn haired boy on Kathryn's lap. He had one for Kathryn too, and then returned to the kitchen.

"You are the most amazing little one a mommy could hope for." He smiled her lopsided smile and leaned forward for a hug. The next thing any of them knew there was a brief flash of light and Owen was clutching Kathryn in terror.

Chapter 50

"Damn it, Q, couldn't you give us a little warning." Kathryn yelled trying to soothe Owen.

"Sorry, but did I hear correctly, you're really going to get married." He looked from Kathryn, rocking Owen in the chair, to Chakotay standing in the doorway of the kitchen looking livid.

"Yes, we are getting married in a couple of days time, if we can swing it."

"Well, it's about time. You two have no idea the trouble I've gone to trying to get the two of you together."

"Why don't you enlighten us?" Kathryn was genuinely curious.

"Forget it, by the time I got to the end you'd want my head served to you on a platter."

"I already want your head on a platter."

"Well, Owen is one of those direct attempts to bring you two closer. My confession of an experiment wasn't entirely accurate. He was just an ingredient, not the experiment itself. No, that was the two of you. I had no idea that you were so strong willed that even a Q couldn't manipulate you."

"I'll take that as a compliment." She continued to rock Owen. "It's all right, my Owen. He's not going to hurt you. We won't let him." He nodded into her, but didn't let go. "Q this is ridiculous would you please come here and help me. You've admitted to me it was a mistake, but that doesn't help him. After that night at Mom's I believe that you are `a Q of your word' and will not take him again or harm him in any way, but he doesn't." Chakotay had come out of the kitchen to watch intently. He knew Kathryn wanted Owen to know that Q wasn't a threat, and he was curious to see how she'd handle this.

"What do you need me to do, Kathy? I am at your service, as long as I can attend the wedding. Like I said, I've worked very hard on the two of you. You're harder than Picard and Crusher, and they're no cake walk." Kathryn looked to Chakotay who shrugged indifference.

"Fair enough, I want you to sit here," she indicated a chair closer to her and Owen, "for the time being, I might need a visual aid in a moment. I don't know if he'll remember your son or not." Kathryn took a steadying breath and looked down at her Owen. "Owen, look up at Mommy." She smiled a soft encouraging smile when he did. "Have I ever lied to you, little fox?"

"No," was his tentative answer accompanied by the shake of his head.

"That's right, I never lie to you, and I never will. So you know you can trust me." He nodded." "Good, do you remember the boy we had visiting on Voyager a few months ago? The one I was teaching?" She nodded at Q, and a picture of Q2 appeared. "This boy." Owen glanced at the picture and nodded. He'd rather liked Q2 after a while. The older boy had been loads of fun. "Good, you see, this man here, that you are so scared of, is his father. He and I made a deal when he asked me to teach his son."

"What kind of deal?"

"Well, in return for my help he promised me to never scare you again. He won't take you from me and he won't hurt you. He wasn't trying to scare you when he took you away, sweetheart. He wanted to see if I was really a good mommy to you." She nodded to Q for his intervention.

"Owen, I am so very sorry that I've caused you such distress. She's right. I was testing her, and in so doing I harmed you. It wasn't my intent and I am deeply sorry I did. Sometimes we Q forget that young humans are so fragile emotionally."

"Do you understand what we're saying?" Kathryn asked him, and Owen nodded. "You don't need to be scared of me any longer. If you ever need help, just call for Uncle Q, and I'll be there to help."

Owen looked side-long at his mama then to Chakotay who was still watching and faced Q squarely. "I don't want your help." He stated indignantly, then hopped down from Kathryn's lap and pulled Chakotay back into the kitchen.

"I think I made him too much like you. He has that same stubborn streak and he's dead set against trusting me."

"That's an understatement, Q." Kathryn paused unsure if she wanted to bolster the omniscient's ego any further, but then decided she had nothing to lose. "I want to thank you Q."

"Really, what for?" He was genuinely stunned at her words.

"For my stubborn duplicate. You granted a wish I'd long desired, but had come to believe would never come to pass. You gave me Owen and I'm grateful." She waited for the smug arrogance to set in. For once though, Q surprised her pleasantly.

"You're welcome, Kathy. Well, look at that, I've got to run, an appointment with another of my favorite mortals. Ta ta," and he blinked away. Kathryn shook her head at him and followed Owen's path to the kitchen. Owen was sitting on the counter again watching Chakotay replicate breakfast.

She walked in and hugged her Owen. "Are you Okay?"

"Yes, I'm not scared, but I still don't like him."

"I know, you don't have to like him, but I don't want you to be scared of him. Just between us, I don't like him too well either." He smiled at her conspiratorial whispers.

"Neither do I." Chakotay said beside them. "But he does have his uses occasionally. I think."

"Sure, sometimes." Both adults knew she was thinking of Owen, but Kathryn still wanted Owen to think of himself as any other child and not that he'd been created by Q, so neither said it aloud.

"Kathryn, what are we going to do about the wedding?" Chakotay changed the direction of the conversation.

"I thought I'd call Admiral Paris after breakfast and set it up for tomorrow and then let Mom and Phoebe and the command staff know. I think everyone except Tuvok is available."

"Okay, what about wedding bands we still haven't found a set."

"So we look today. I'm sure we can find something."

"Okay." He leaned across Owen for a kiss. Owen made a face and shook his head.

"Mushy stuff." That comment earned him a tickle from Chakotay.

"Your Mom gives the best mushy stuff." He said when he'd finished retaliating.

"Yeah, I guess so. Can we eat now?"

"I'll bring it out, you two go sit down." Chakotay stated, and Kathryn lifted Owen back off the counter and carried him out to breakfast.

Chakotay joined them in short order and before long they were recycling the leftovers. Kathryn made the call to Owen Paris while Chakotay went with Owen to change him out of his pajamas.

"Yes, ah, hello Kathryn." Mrs. Paris answered.

"Hello, how are you?"

"Just fine, how can I help you this morning, Kathryn?"

"I was hoping to talk with Owen for a moment, if he's free." Her nerves were rising and she felt the urge to pace, but quelled it.

"I'll send you to him in the office." The screen blinked to a stand by and then Owen Paris himself answered.

"Morning Kathryn, what can I do for you so early?"

"How is your agenda for tomorrow looking, Owen?"

"So far it's pretty clear. After the party and our discussion I've left it open for you. I take it you're ready."

"Yes. We'll be out today looking for a wedding set, but by tomorrow night we intend to be married. It'll be small. I'm going to have Mom and Phoebe transport in tonight, and Tom and B'elanna and probably Harry Kim will be there also. Other than Chakotay, Owen and myself that's all."

"Okay, 1600 hours tomorrow then."

"Sounds fine. Thank you Owen." She was aglow with happiness as she signed off.

"It's all set then." Chakotay's voice came from behind her.

"Tomorrow at 4 o'clock." She turned and slid into his arms kissing his lips as she did.

"Good. We'd better get going then. Let your mother know, while I finish getting ready." Chakotay kissed her cheek then let go to find his and Owen's shoes. Kathryn made the call to her mother, and informed her what was going on. She and Phoebe agreed to transport into Starfleet HQ that evening, and they signed off.

The search for rings was much quicker than the first attempt and left the new family with quite a lot of time on their hands. Kathryn, knowing the area best, took Owen and Chakotay on a tour of the city. By lunch they had settled in golden gate park to eat their fill. Kathryn and Chakotay sat and watched Owen play with some other children that were throwing a Frisbee and chasing a golden retriever around.

"Have you thought about getting another dog, Kathryn?" Chakotay asked her after they'd watched Owen get clobbered by the retriever and stand up again laughing madly to rejoin the chase.

"I did at first, but now I think I'll wait to see if we're going back out on Voyager before I decide to buy a pet. We wouldn't be able to take a dog with us into space. A cat perhaps, or something small, but not a dog like that one, or like Molly." She sounded wistful.

"How do you feel about small dogs, like a Shih Tzu or maybe a Pug something like that?"

"I don't know. I'd still rather wait to see what will happen before I get an animal for him or myself." She settled further back into his chest.

He nodded, "I see your point, but every kid needs a pet of some kind."

"Look Dad, if you want to get him a dog go ahead, but I'm not taking care of it when it's time to go out for a walk." She grinned when he sat speechless at her outburst. The look on his face was priceless, and she knew her use of the word dad would conjure just such a reaction. "You are now, you know, officially his dad."

"I know, but he still calls me by my name. It just doesn't feel like it, I guess, without the term dad, being used."

"Please, he's always thought of you as his father. You've said you felt the same before now. We just have to start referring to you as dad with him, and not Chakotay. He'll pick up on it eventually, and when we have a baby it'll call you daddy and that will be an example too." She entwined their fingers.

"Thank you, Kathryn." He kissed the nape of her neck as his arms tightened.

"You're welcome, Daddy." She hugged his arms since that was the only part of him she could reach. "What time is it?" She asked after a few more minutes of watching Owen play.

"1500, why?"

"We should get going, I want to finish putting the house in order before Mom gets here. She'll do it for us if we don't have it done." Kathryn extricated herself from him and began gathering their things together. "Owen! it's time to go, sweetheart."

"Okay, Mama." The five year old turned back to his new friends for a moment to say good bye. He then came running back to her and Chakotay.

"Can I help with something Mama?"

She smiled at Chakotay, might as well start now, she thought. "Yes, you and daddy can go and find the car."

"Okay, come on, Chakotay." Owen took off at a trot toward the parking lots.

"See, he knows you're his daddy." Chakotay kissed her nose and grabbed a handful of their meal refuse.

"Okay, I concede. Let's go, he's already waiting at the car for us." Chakotay followed their son and deposited the trash in a receptacle on the way. Kathryn finished and joined them.

They spent the rest of the afternoon finishing with the unpacking, and by the time Chakotay returned to the house with Gretchen and Phoebe and the girls, Owen was playing in his playroom. Kathryn was working on the details of tomorrow's ceremony, and had informed the rest of their guests that they were expected, when the door opened to admit the group of travelers.

She rose from the couch to greet them and called Owen downstairs. He appeared to receive the welcome hugs from his aunt and grandma and then he and Ally disappeared back up the stairs to play before bed. Kathryn and Chakotay gave a tour of the house to their guests and helped them to get their things settled in the guest rooms accompanied by the squeals of the older two children wearing themselves out in the playroom. Then it was dinner time and they turned in early to be ready for the next day.

Chapter 51

Chakotay woke to a silent, empty room, and being that this house was a little more modern than Gretchen's it was better sound-proofed so he couldn't hear the ruckus down in the living room. He made himself presentable and joined his soon-to-be wife and in-laws until B'elanna arrived with Miral and told Chakotay in no uncertain terms that he was going with Tom and Harry to the Paris's to get things ready. While she and the other ladies fussed over Kathryn.

"I'd like to see this, but I can take a hint. I'm not wanted."

"What about me, Mama? What am I gonna do today?" Owen asked tugging on one end of his Flotter while Lissy squealed and tugged on the other. "That's mine, let GO!"

"Whoa, hold on." Phoebe intervened. "Lissy, this is Owen's toy. Here is one of yours." She plucked the toy from her daughter's hands and left it to Owen.

"You're going with Dad and Tom. I think we have enough howling banshees here." She indicated the now squalling Lissy, and a cranky Miral.

"Oh good. Can we leave now?" He looked up at Chakotay and stuck his fingers in his ears to drown out the cacophony.

"Nope, your mom needs a kiss first." Owen rushed over to Kathryn where she sat and climbed into her already crowded lap, nudging Ally over, to give her a perfunctory peck.

"Okay, let's go."

"Hold it, you." Kathryn grabbed hold of his back pocket and pulled him back to her. "That wasn't very convincing." She planted a better kiss on his forehead and then sent him on his way. Chakotay came over and kissed her as well. "See you there, love."

"I'll be waiting for you." Chakotay returned affectionately, then hauled Owen up over a shoulder so that the boy's head and shoulders dangled across his back he headed out to the entry. "You put those shoes on, sir, while I get our suits." Owen nodded and set about putting his little shoes on. Chakotay returned with the garment bags they'd picked up from the store yesterday and they walked out the door.

As soon as the door shut, the girls started in on getting Kathryn ready. She was exasperated by the attention and the trouble. This was going to be simple, after all. Outside Chakotay and Owen were pulled into Tom and B'elanna's car by Captain Proton and Buster Kincaid's alter egos, and driven across town to Admiral Paris's residence.

They were greeted by a buzz of activity and Admiral Paris when they arrived. He ushered them in the door with a flourish while directing the florist where to set up the assortment of flowers on the dining table.

"What's going on here, Dad?" Tom asked with eyes widened at the bustle in the house.

"I'm getting the house ready for a wedding, Tom." He turned to Chakotay and Owen. "I hope you don't mind, but I've expanded things considerably since Kathryn's call yesterday. I thought I'd surprise Kathryn with a slightly larger wedding than you had planned. I've turned my back yard into a rose garden overnight for this. I've also taken the liberty of inviting a few more people. Old friends of Kathryn's mostly, though B'elanna helped me track down a few of yours as well. I know you wanted this simple, but Kathryn's like a daughter to me, and in the absence of her own father I took it upon myself to give her a beautiful ceremony." He was speaking as they traversed the house. Harry and Tom following along gaping at the decorations that had appeared so quickly since they'd been here the day before.

"Thank you, Admiral. She'll love it. I know she said she wanted a small wedding, but what woman doesn't dream of something extravagant. Deep down that is what Kathryn wants, she's all utilitarian on the surface, but underneath is a woman just like any other, and she deserves all the fuss. For myself, I don't really care what the wedding is like as long as she is my wife at the end of everything. So run me through the changes."

"Nothing major. Owen here will still be your ring bearer," He said as he reached out to ruffle the hair of the boy in Chakotay's arms, "and you and Kathryn will be the only ones up front with me besides him, but the witnesses have turned into guests, and there are a few more of them." Paris paused to think for a moment. "Oh yes, I've found someone to escort the bride as well. Come on out back, I'll show you what I've done and introduce you." He led them out onto the porch where a group of people stood admiring the transformation of the yard.

Among the group were Tom's mother and sisters and a couple that none of the officers knew as well as Voyager's own Holo-doctor. Of the couple they didn't know Chakotay thought the man looked vaguely familiar. The woman held a small child in her arms and another that looked similar enough to be a sibling stood holding the man's hand.

"Doc!" Harry called as he stepped out behind them, and the group turned at the exclamation.

"Hello gentlemen. Owen, how are you?" The doctor addressed his friends.

"Okay." Owen stated as they began the greetings and introductions. Chakotay stepped over with the Admiral and Owen to the couple and Chakotay finally figured out why the man was familiar when Paris introduced him as Mark Johnson. He had changed a bit in the time since he and Kathryn had taken the picture that had graced her readyroom. Chakotay had felt threatened by this man for the longest, but now he found that the feeling had disappeared and been replaced by a curiosity.

"Hello, I finally get to meet the famous Mark that Kathryn spoke of."

He shifted Owen to one arm and shook the other man's hand.

"All good, I hope." He smiled through the comment.

"Mostly, yes. I admit after she got your letter she wasn't happy but it was to be expected under the circumstances." Chakotay answered. "I've been curious about you since then. She soon had more immediate things to go on about than ex-fiancée's."

"Ah, yes, and how is young Owen? Excited about all this.?" He brought his attention to bear on the boy holding onto Chakotay affectionately.

Owen shrugged and laid his head on Chakotay's shoulder. "I guess so. Mama's gonna marry Chakotay today. I think it's all crazy cause he's around all the time and nothin's gonna change anyway, and everyone's acting weird."

"Adults are like that sometimes, little man." Chakotay chuckled at Owen's reply. The doctor chose that moment to come over for a better look at his young patient.

"Well, I don't see any adverse effects from the fall I heard about."

"No, my arm isn't even sore anymore. Look," Owen lifted his arm as high up as he could and swung it around a bit. "See, I'm all better." He didn't want another check up. Like his mother he didn't like to spend too much time being poked and prodded.

"Good, I was worried when I heard about it."

"He's fine, Doc. We took him to Starfleet Medical and Dr. Crusher was on hand to take care of him. Kathryn's been after him to take it easy too. I was shocked the first time she admonished him for not listening to his doctor's instructions. She never listened to you." Chakotay said seriously yet with a hint of mirth.

"I'll say, keeping Captain Janeway out of her Readyroom or off the bridge when she was ill or injured was a tax on even my program's parameters." This had the whole group of them chuckling, and the banter continued in this manner for a while as they all got to know each other. Paris eventually got around to giving them a tour of the grounds and showed Owen and Chakotay what they'd be expected to do during the ceremony.

At around fifteen hundred, other guests began arriving and Chakotay took Owen inside to get changed for the ceremony. Chakotay wore a pair of tan slacks with a cream colored shirt and a dark brown vest. He knew that Kathryn would be wearing a simple dress like she'd worn on New Earth and knew that this would match it perfectly. Owen was wearing a similar ensemble that was casually dressy.

They made their way back outside greeting people along the way. It had only taken them fifteen minutes to change, but there were considerably many more guests than there had been. Tom and Harry were speaking with a few of the old crew who were present. Chakotay made his way through the crowd to them. He shook hands with Ayala and hugged Sam and Naomi.

"How are you, Naomi?"

"Just fine, I've had a wonderful time getting to know my father over the last few weeks and I'm in school now. It was hard adjusting to the way they do things after all my tutors on Voyager, but I've got the hang of it now."

Chakotay had left Owen a little behind in his haste to see his crewmen and Owen had finally found them. "Naomi!" He came running. He hadn't seen his surrogate sister since the night Chakotay had accompanied them to Indiana.

"Hi Owen. What have you been up to lately? Are you in school?"

"No, Mama and Chakotay got me a tutor. Mama says that maybe later when everything calms down and a new semester starts I'll get to go to a real school, but I don't mind my tutor. I am the only one in my class so I can ask anything I want and interrupt as much as I need to. I miss having you to play with all the time though."

"Yeah, it has been kind of lonely at home. No holodeck to run off to." Owen nodded agreement.

"Nope, but sometimes we go to the park and play with the other kids there. One day they even had a dog and I got to play with him. Mama says that we might get a dog later on, but I want one now." Admiral Paris came up to them at this point and called Chakotay and Owen away for a moment to discuss a few details. By the time they were finished, B'elanna had come out to let them know that the bride had arrived and Paris bustled off to surprise Kathryn.

Chapter 52

Kathryn was ushered into the house by her entourage and B'elanna went off to

find Admiral Paris. Kathryn was ready for the ceremony in a simple, but elegant dress that Chakotay had helped her choose the night before. She looked around the room while waiting for the Admiral to appear noting the roses and other flowers he'd arranged in his home. Before she got a closer look than that, however B'elanna and Paris entered the room and she was caught up in a great fatherly hug. "Owen you've outdone yourself. This is beautiful." She stated returning his embrace.

"You have no idea, Kathryn. I've got a surprise for you. I hope you don't mind;

your groom didn't, but I don't think that anything could upset him today. Except maybe you standing him up."

"What kind of surprise, Owen?" She'd always been wary of surprises.

"I've expanded your quaint ceremony to accommodate a few extra guests that's

all. I've invited a few of your old friends and a few of Chakotay's as well. I've arranged for someone to walk you down the aisle as well." He beckoned to B'elanna who disappeared out the door momentarily and reappeared with Mark in tow.

"Mark?" She was genuinely stunned.

"Hello Kath." He enveloped her in a hug. "Congratulations. Would you let me have the honor of escorting you to your husband?" He was as he'd always been, gentle handed, and friendly. "I'll understand if not, and we have a back-up, but it would be my pleasure to walk you down to Chakotay."

"Of course, Mark. Thank you, I don't know what to say." She speared Paris with a look. "How did you do this, and who was your back up?"

"An admiral can get a lot done in a small amount of time, and Commander Data,

I believe you know him, was our back up. Now he's just another guest."

"And how many guests are there?"

"Between thirty and forty. I lost count. A few more of the enterprise crew that

expressed interest in being here, some of your crew, we tried to get Tuvok here, but he's still undergoing the treatment for his illness, some of the former Maquis that B'elanna helped me track down for Chakotay's half, and the family members we found he had living in Ohio. That last is a surprise we have yet to spring on him, though so don't spoil it. I want to wait until after the ceremony. I would like you to meet one of them though." He left the room for a moment. When he returned there was a young woman with him. She had short hair that was as dark as Chakotay's and the same skin tone, but her eyes were a dark, penetrating green.

There was a gentleness in her eyes that Kathryn would always attribute to Chakotay, but her gaze was calculating in a way that Chakotay could wear at times, but in her eyes it seemed to be a part of who she was.

Kathryn knew instantly that this was Chakotay's sister. "Chenoa?" She asked to be positive.

"Yes. You are the one that has my brother walking around in such a cloud of happiness that he hasn't noticed his family yet." The woman's voice was like the cooing of a dove.

"Yes, but he told me you were dead. I mean I don't mean to be rude, but how is this possible?" Chakotay's sister opened her mouth to speak, but Kathryn stopped her. "No wait. Wait until Chakotay can hear it too. As curious as I am, it isn't right without him. I'm so happy that you are here though. Seeing you will ease a pain in him that I can't help with." The younger woman smiled and the calculating look disappeared from her gaze. Kathryn suddenly felt she'd passed a test, and promptly realized she had. Chenoa had been scrutinizing her sincerity toward Chakotay.

"I am pleased to meet you. I'm looking forward to getting to know you better. Now is not the time though. You have a ceremony to get to, and I wouldn't want to

keep my brother waiting." Kathryn reached out and took the younger woman's hand.

"I'm glad I get the chance to know you too. I feel I already do as much as Chakotay told me of you. I'd ask you to stand up there with us, but that would spoil the surprise and delay the ceremony as well. We'll talk a little later." There was a flash of light that Kathryn was beginning to get used to.

"I didn't miss anything did I?" Q asked.

Kathryn rolled her eyes toward the skies. "Not yet, go out there and find a seat." Q disappeared, and Chenoa and B'elanna and the other ladies followed him out leaving Kathryn with Mark and Owen Paris.

"By the way, Kathryn, you look beautiful. Your father would be so proud." He smiled that smile she'd known since her academy days, the one she'd thought was lost when they'd been tortured by the Cardassians. She was relieved that it hadn't been lost, only misplaced for a while.

"Thank you, Owen. I don't know how proud seeing that I'm marrying a Maquis, but I'd like to think he would."

"I know he would, Kathryn. I'm proud, and I was more opposed to the Maquis than he ever would have been. I promise you nothing you could ever do would mar the pride your father had when he spoke of you." Tears welled in her eyes as the Admiral went on about her father and relayed a few of the things he'd said about her. "Don't start that yet, wouldn't want all the work they did on your make-up to run prematurely." He gathered her in a fatherly hug. "I just wanted you to know those things. He should have been able to say those things to you not about you, but his career got in the way of his life. I'm happy you're trying to find a way to merge the two of them, and not have the regrets he and I share where our families are concerned."

"Thank you, sir. I appreciate it. I just wish he could be here, but since he can't I'm glad you are here." She returned the hug briefly before he pulled away.

"Now, let's get you out there, Chakotay was enough of a wreck when I left him. No need to torture him by keeping him waiting." He kissed her cheek and went to get things started.

"Ready?" Mark asked stepping from the background to offer his arm.

"Most definitely." She grasped his bicep and they stepped out to the porch to wait for Paris's cue to join them.

Chakotay and Owen stood in their places waiting for the Admiral to reappear and get things rolling. Chakotay got more jumpy by the minute. He wasn't worried about Kathryn but he was anxious to begin their life together, and the longer he waited the more he wished they'd just eloped two nights ago.

Owen, on the other hand, was bored nearly to tears. He had to stand here and hold this little box and he wanted to be playing with the other children he saw among the guests. Chakotay shifted feet again and Owen looked up at him. He was watching the aisle that Owen's mama was supposed to walk down with a nervous expression. He shook his head at the man beside him and reached up to take his hand.

Owen's hand stole into his and Chakotay looked down at him. Owen smiled up at him calmly. Chakotay smiled back and let go of Owen's hand to put his arm around his boy. Owen leaned against him content for a little longer. While he was distracted with Owen Chakotay missed seeing the group of ladies exit the house and take their seats. When he looked back up though he noticed Gretchen and Phoebe now sitting beside Ben and the girls.

"Your Grandma and Aunt are here, things must be almost ready inside." Chakotay informed Owen. He caught Gretchen's eye and nodded. She smiled softly and nodded back to say that it was just about to begin. A few minutes later Paris had made his way to them and then after he'd taken his place and called for the guests to rise, Kathryn was being escorted to him.

The agreement was that things would be simple and the music would be reserved for the reception that Paris had orchestrated. His bride came to him with the sounds of the afternoon breeze and the birds accompanying her. He'd known what she was going to wear, he'd helped pick it out, but somehow it looked more beautiful now than he'd remembered it looking last night. She was the only thing he could see at this moment.

The group around them disappeared and his vision only registered Kathryn. There was a gleam in her eyes and she radiated happiness, and she was looking at him alone as he was looking at her. He wondered briefly if he looked to her like she did to him, but he doubted he looked that good.

He would have been wrong though. Kathryn was just as entranced by him. He stood there beside Paris. Tall and proud, and absolutely, unimaginably handsome in her eyes. The only one other than he that she noticed was her Owen holding the ring box in his hands, and close enough to Chakotay for him to have an arm around their son.

She noted he was subdued, for once, and looked as entranced as Chakotay watching her walk toward them. Finally she and Mark reached them, and he turned to her and kissed her cheek delicately. "Be happy, Kath, and you," he turned to Chakotay, "take good care of her."

"I most certainly will, rest assured." They shook hands then. Owen was silent until Mark had moved to take his seat beside his wife.

"You look pretty, Mama." He said it just loud enough for the first few rows to hear and there were chuckles from some of the guests at his remark.

"Thank you, Sweetheart." She smiled and they turned to face Admiral Paris. Chakotay helped Owen maneuver to his assigned position between and just behind them. Paris began then in a traditional manner speaking of the gravity of the commitment they were making to one another. His words only registered as secondary to the thoughts of the bride and groom though.

The two of them were thinking back over the trials and good times they'd had as Paris spoke of the fights that were sure to come and compromises they'd have to make. Both knew how right he was, and they knew in their hearts that they'd do their best to work through the differences they'd face as surely as they had in the past. That the most important thing between them was their friendship. Finally, after a fair bit, Paris got to the vows and turned the ceremony over to them momentarily.

"I once told you an ancient legend, Kathryn, about an angry warrior, and how he found peace. What I didn't tell you was that it was the story of my life, although I have a sneaky suspicion you knew that. I want you to know that the legend continues to grow as we grow together. There is much more to that legend now and it is far from finished. I look forward to writing the rest of it with you and Owen and any future children by my side." He looked down to Owen then and found him ready with Kathryn's ring. He took the ring gently and with a hand that shook placed it on her finger.

"Chakotay, you offered your heart to me before I was ready to accept it. You were more patient than any man has a right to be with the woman he loves. Not only did you accept my hesitation, but you stood beside me through it and you extended that love to encompass my child as well as myself. You were my enemy, and then my comrade, then my friend and finally my love. Now, you are my life, and my future. A very long time ago I said, `Three years ago I didn't even know your name, and today I can't imagine a day without you.' That sentiment still rings true in my heart, more so now than even then. Then I meant it as one friend to another, now I feel it as your wife, and as your partner in this life. I look forward to what tomorrow with you will bring." She accepted the matching ring from Owen and slipped it onto Chakotay's finger. She then raised her left hand as she had so long ago on New Earth.

Chakotay saw her gesture and bit his lower lip to stifle his gasp of surprise. He raised his right hand and entwined their fingers as he had the last time she'd made this gesture. This was Paris's cue to finish the ceremony and he stepped forward to speak the last few lines and bid Chakotay to kiss the bride. As soon as the phrase left his mouth Chakotay and Kathryn came together and finalized the traditional ceremony. They broke apart and Paris presented them to the crowd. Chakotay lifted Owen from the ground and held Kathryn's hand as they walked back down the aisle and into the house.

Paris was behind them and the guests followed a row at a time to greet the new family. Chakotay set Owen back on his feet to shake hands with the guests, and Owen slipped between the newlyweds to hold onto his mama. By the end of the line both were very grateful that Paris only invited forty guests. They were both surprised to see almost the entire command staff of the enterprise had shown up. The only one not present was Gordi LaForge.

"Congratulations to the both of you," Picard stated shaking Chakotay's hand, and bestowing a chaste kiss on Kathryn's cheek. He even shook Owen's little hand after Kathryn had persuaded the boy to let go of her. When Beverly Crusher stepped over behind Picard though, Owen had a hug and a bright smile for her.

Finally, the line ended and Paris pulled the couple and Owen out of the room stating that they needed to take pictures, and attend to a few small details. Chakotay again gathered Owen into his arms and he and Kathryn followed Paris out of the room and back out to the yard. A small group of people stood just off the porch, and Kathryn took Owen from Chakotay urging him forward to speak to the group who had their backs turned at the moment. At their approach, the group turned, and Chakotay got his first good look at them. The first two of the five faces were a surprise, but not overly so. The third, fourth and fifth faces, however made him go white with shock.

Chapter 53

Chakotay felt as though he'd seen ghosts, which for all intents and purposes he had. "How?"

"We were not there, Chakotay." Chenoa, the oldest of the three apparitions stepped forward to him. He reached out slowly and her hand met his half-way. "We are real, my brother." She said into the silence.

"I don't know how to believe it."

"Believe it, big brother. We've been here on earth the whole time. Father sent us here before the Cardassians showed up, but only just barely." Tama said living up to the meaning of her name. Her tongue still flashed as fast as a thunderbolt.

"Come here." The three of them came to him and he embraced them fiercely. "Spirits, thank you." Tears streamed down as he held his sisters. "How, why didn't you contact me after the colony fell. I believed you were dead."

"We tried, but you were cut off and then you were with the Maquis, and finally you were lost. We heard about it over the news." Chenoa told him softly. "Father smuggled us out to Uncle Tyee and Aunt Kachine here on Earth. He didn't have time to tell you what he'd done before the attack."

"What about Chayton?" Chakotay asked of their brother.

"He followed you into the Maquis. We lost him when they were massacred." Chakotay's eyes closed at the renewed loss of his younger brother. Litonya, his youngest sister, spoke then timid as a butterfly with the man she barely remembered.

"At least we have you back, Chakotay." He'd been near twenty when Litonya was born and had seen her only a few times before he'd thought them lost, but the few times he'd seen her he'd doted on her. He loosened his hold on the three of them to place a hand on her face.

"Yes, and I have the three of you again, Tony. Spirits this is a wonderful day." He turned to Kathryn who was speaking with his Aunt and Uncle. "Come and meet your sister and nephew." The three followed him over to the others. No one had noticed Paris disappear back into the house. His Aunt and Uncle pulled themselves out of their conversation with Kathryn to hug him and welcome him home. Kathryn turned to Chenoa and the others when Chakotay pulled her and Owen over.

"Kathryn these are my sisters. Chenoa, the eldest, Tama, and Litonya." Kathryn smiled softly at the reverence in his voice.

"I'm pleased to meet you all."

"I didn't know you had sisters, Chakotay." Owen said while studying the women beside them.

"For a long time I didn't think I had sisters anymore, Owen. So I didn't speak of them much."

Owen pulled away from Kathryn and Chakotay received the boy. "Why not?"

"I thought they had died a long time ago."

"Oh, why?" He asked again.

"I'll tell you later. For now we should return inside before out guests think we've abandoned them." Chakotay suggested setting Owen back on his feet, and taking Kathryn's and Chenoa's hands. The other two fell into step behind them with Owen. Litonya took to the little one's charm and innocent curiosity instantly. The big blue eyes didn't hurt either, and by the time they entered the reception again Owen was in the young woman's arms at ease with her as though he'd known her his whole life.

The reception was like most other receptions opening gifts, dinner inoffensive to those of the vegetarian persuasion. Tom Paris proposed a toast to the happy couple. Thanking them for being stubborn enough to wait until they got back to the Alpha quadrant when the betting pools on them were null and void. Then came the cutting of the cake. When Chakotay smeared icing across Kathryn's cheeks and she retaliated the crowd got a good laugh at Owen's admonishment of both of them, `You're not supposed to do that with your food,' and their retaliating with icing smeared on his face as well. Finally, the crowd returned to the backyard where a dance floor had been set up. The first dance was reserved as always for the bride and groom, but before long there were an abundance of dancers.

Chakotay was reunited with Chenoa's husband and family as well as introduced to Tama's. Litonya was still single at barely twenty-five. At one point during the festivities, while Kathryn danced with her son, Chakotay sat watching his family, new and old out on the dance floor. He felt a familiar pair of arms circle his neck from behind and a voice asked, "How you feeling, Old Man?"

"Truly blessed, B'ela, truly blessed. Did you have anything to do with finding my sisters?" He reached up to take her hands still watching Kathryn with Tom now. Owen was still out there as well, dancing with Litonya. He smiled at his little sister making Owen giggle.

"Not really. They contacted Starfleet trying to find you when Voyager's return was broadcast. Whoever they got told them that the best person to ask for your whereabouts was Tom's father. He set everything up. I hadn't even met them before today." She hugged him from behind.

"Thank you, anyway. Kathryn looks wonderful, and I think you are to thank for that."

"Not really, her mother and sister helped. Besides, you'd think she was gorgeous even if she looked like a drowned rat." This statement earned her a chuckle.

"Too true. Thank you for being a friend then. She and I both needed you to be."

"Your friend or hers."

"Both B'ela, you helped the pain of losing my younger siblings bearable, and you were her friend when she needed one." He felt her smile.

"It was my pleasure Chakotay. You were my family when I needed one too, and so was she. How about a dance, Old Man?" She let go of him so he could stand.

"Sure, but after this one I want you to cut in on your husband and my wife. I want another turn with her." B'elanna agreed and he led her onto the floor. They slipped in with the other dancers easily, and when the song ended Chakotay took

possession of his wife's hand and pulled her close for the next dance.

"Hello wife." He whispered in her ear as he kissed it, and he felt her shiver against him.

"Hi, my husband. Miss me already?" She settled further against him as the music started and they began to sway.

"Am I that transparent?" She chuckled and nodded. "Good, I wouldn't have it any other way between us." She gave him her crooked smile before resting her head above his heart. They danced uninterrupted through the next two songs. At the start of the third, Owen came up and tugged on Chakotay's pants. He and Kathryn disentangled just long enough for Chakotay to lift Owen off the floor with one arm.

Kathryn re-wrapped her arms around Chakotay, including Owen now, and they continued dancing. Owen put an arm around each of their necks and hugged them. He let go of his mama then and turned to rest his head on Chakotay's shoulder where he promptly dozed off. "It's almost time to go, Kathryn." Chakotay informed.

"I know, and a part of me doesn't want to." She caressed Owen's face softly with the backs of her fingers.

"It's only five days, my love, and I'll keep you so busy you won't miss him." He grinned lasciviously.

"I don't doubt it. I just can't help it. The last time I was away from him for more than a day or two was when Q took him." She sighed.

"He'll be with your mother and Tom and B'ela will pick him up the day before we get home. He'll be fine." She nodded and he kissed her softly. "You can always call him if you need to."

"I know, let's get going, Angry Warrior. If we don't I don't think we will." She let go of him and pulled Owen into her own arms. "Go talk to your sisters while I get his things from the car and leave them with Mom." He nodded and they parted with another kiss. Chakotay found Tama first and pulled her into a hug.

"We're getting ready to head out. I'll contact you when we get back. We'll get

together and have time for a proper reunion between the four of us." She hugged him back and agreed giving him information he'd need to contact her. He repeated this process with Chenoa and Litonya, and by the time he got to Litonya, Kathryn had returned Owen still on her hip. He was awake now, though. Kathryn had made her rounds with his sisters and her family and was as ready to go as she could be.

"Go to Daddy, my Owen." She transferred the boy as he leaned to Chakotay. "Litonya, I look forward to seeing you again soon. Thank you for keeping Owen occupied earlier. He truly enjoys your company."

"It was my pleasure, I assure you. I love children and I have spoiled all my other nieces and nephews since they were born. I have to make up for time with my new nephew." She pulled Kathryn into a hug. "Enjoy your week together."

"We will," on impulse Kathryn added, "and if you want to spend time with Owen, I'll leave you my mother's contact information. He'll be ready for a distraction in a couple of days."

"Thank you. I'd like that."

"Me too." Owen stated from Chakotay's arms. Litonya leaned closer and kissed

Owen's cheek.

"You have fun and when I have some free time later this week I'll get in touch with you for a time to visit." Owen nodded.

Chakotay hugged his baby sister once more and they took their leave. They left Owen with Gretchen and then with a barrage of bird seed escorting them they left the reception heading for a transport station. Chakotay had arranged their honeymoon for a week long stay at the Janeway family cabin on Lake George. He made arrangements for sailing, but wondered if they'd actually use the boat.

They materialized on the porch of the cabin and Kathryn's eyes lit up with glee. "Oh, Chakotay." He smiled at her tone so filled with love.

"I thought you'd like this. So did your mother." He tapped in a code on the panel by the door and it swished open. Chakotay turned and pulled Kathryn close for a kiss. He cupped her face in both his hands caressing her cheek bones with his thumbs when they pulled apart. "I love you, wife."

"I love you too, so much, Chakotay." The way she said his name, more a sigh than a word sent shivers up and down his spine. "You were right. I love this. Thank you." He smiled at her then scooped her into his arms and carried her inside. The door closed and he called for it to lock.

"Direct me to the bedroom, love." Kathryn smiled at him.

"You don't waste any time do you?" She giggled at the look of frustration he sent her.

"I don't hear any complaints do I?" Kathryn shook her head and directed him to the stairs. There was only one room upstairs and it was theirs. He carried her into

the room and deposited her on the edge of the bed. He kissed her tenderly while he undid the buttons in the front of her dress. She pushed the vest off his shoulders and started in on his shirt buttons.

"Did I ever tell you how good you look in this outfit?" She kissed the center of

his chest as it was revealed.

"No, but then I didn't tell you how beautiful you are in these types of dresses

either."

"Yes you did. Every time I wear them you can't take your eyes off me. That says it all." She kissed his closed eyes while he pushed the dress off her shoulders. As it fell she raised up on her knees and pulled him close until their stomachs grazed and they both gasped at the contact. "You'd think we'd get used to that feeling." She said as he wrapped his arms around her bringing them into full contact.

"Yes, you would, but I hope we never do."

"Me too." Chakotay pushed her back onto the bed and the world faded into the background for a few beautiful hours.

The end...for now.


End file.
